Naturals, what was the determining factor that made you go natural?

Hated going to the salon, hated the relaxing process, and realized that relaxing was not something that I had to do. If I didn't like it, I could just stop. So I did. I haven't missed my relaxer at all.

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i had nothing to lose. i already had EL/NL hair with scraggly ends. My poor mom, no sense of hair care. Permed our hair every 2 weeks. I figured there was a better way. My first BC was December 25, '08. By now, I would have been atleast APL, but i permed again after pressure from my family to relax. Here I am, 7 months natural, BC'ed on Dec. 16. I really want to be healthier now, and finally have my goal hair length

I forgot to mention that I hate going to salons. I calculated that I was spending an average of $2500 a year at the salon. Besides the money, I was wasting about 5 hours at the salon every Saturday. I could've done my own hair but I liked having the stylist do it. Maybe I liked fried hair and giving my money away, I dunno.

Becoming natural has left me no Choice but to become a DIYer since the ladies at the salon cringe when they see my long, THICK, waist length hair. I save money but it has also made me care for my own hair.

ETA: OP good luck!

Years ago I went natural because my relaxed hair was always breaking off and never grew past shoulder length. After BC'ing I remained natural for about 7 years. I made it past shoulder length, but here's the problem: I like wearing my hair straight. Another problem: I exercise several times a week and sweat...a lot (spin, kickboxing, running, etc.).

So, after lurking on this site for a couple of years, I decided I knew enough about my hair and hair products to relax and have healthy hair. I cut off a couple of inches, relaxed and haven't looked back. That was two years ago and it was the BEST decision I've ever made for ME. I stretch my relaxers 14-16 weeks. My hair feels good. My ends look great. My hair doesn't take five hours to air dry and I can wear it straight without fearing reversion.

To answer the original question, convenience and personal hair style preferences were the determining factors for me relaxing.

Duh! Just realized I misread the question. My first post and it's a fail. Sorry!

I am transitioning so I hope its fine to post here.

I am soooo over relaxers. The risk is too much just get "straight" hair. Along with the constant upkeep just so the weakened hair won't break off. Hair is prone to splits, constant breakage, and it never seems to get past a certain point.. Also my relaxed hair doesn't hold a candle to my natural hair. I can clearly see how limp and thin my relaxed hair is compared to the NG.

It will be like getting out of jail when I finally cut these relaxed ends off. They will not be missed.

When I get sick of spending every GOT DAMN weekend, well either Sat or Sun, in the Dominican salon for at least 4 hrs so I could do a combination of the following: be there at 7:30am to get in line b/c doors open at 8am and if you get there late you extend your time in the salon, get a hot oil treatment & wash or wash & dc, then roller set (TOOK OVER AN HOUR EVERY TIME ON THOSE LARGE GREY/BLACK ROLLERS - OMG!!!!) and wrap it up.

Also when I got sick of babysitting my relaxed hair like it was a disabled newborn : not too much heat when blowing or curling, careful on the tension of hair bands, don't wear a ponytail too often, be super duper slow and careful every time a comb or brush hits those precious strands, don't EVER get a blow out, counting how many stray pieces of hair ended up on the floor/counter/sink/tub and checking for breakage or shedding, constantly worrying about every loose strand was a sign of not enough protein or not enough moisture ... It became obsessive and not fun... I no longer enjoyed 24"-26" of straight hair that couldn't hold a curl longer than an hour to save it's life!!! I worked hard to get that length, I mean I was dedicated... 7 years of weekends at a salon I will never get back

Cutting it off was terrifying b/c I hadn't been natural since I was a little girl (7yrs old, 30 now) but I was so glad I gave those relaxed strands the biggest I was able too - THE SCISSORS - so I haven't looked back since. Yes I had a moments of doubt but I am so glad I stuck it out

This thread sealed the deal for me.
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=141693

The OP asks "If you could wake up in the morning and have MBL hair... would you want it to be LONG & RELAXED or LONG & NATURAL?"

And that made it everything simple for me. I wanted long and natural hair so I stopped toying with the idea of staying relaxed to see how long I could get it with good hair practices, because I knew once I achieved long relaxed hair it would not be what I truly wanted.

The determining factor for me was during a relaxer stretch. I stretched for about 4 months while my hair was in braids. When i finally took them down, I saw how thick my natural new growth was and how thin and over processed my relaxed ends are. I did my own big chop right then. Plus, it was too much work for me to get my hair straight. Just a relaxer was not enough. I also had to flat iron it just to get it to lay right. Obviously my hair didn't want to be straight so I figured I might as well go natural.

My last relaxer was in the late 90s. No matter who did my hair (at home or at a salon) I always had scalp irritation. In 1997, my hair fell out in the middle, but even then I relaxed my hair 1 or 2 more times.

I moved to a new city and needed a hair stylist. The one I found had a funky attitude but she did good hair so I kept going back. Getting an appointment was hell, though. I tried applying the relaxer myself, but, ended up with scalp burns and my hair fell out. Went back to the funky attitude stylist and got a super short, but, very cute hair cut. A few years later, I finally got sick of the hair stylist attitude. So, I found a new one. The new stylist wasn't as good, but, she was cheerful and I could easily get an appointment. However, she constantly showed up late to appointments and would bring her 2 kids with her to the salon. The kids were cute, but, annoying.

After years of relaxers and dealing with awful hair stylist, I decided to go natural. I had no idea there would so much info online to help me. I was scared and had no clue how to grow my relaxer out without all my hair breaking off. So, I started researching and found hair boards. I grew my relaxer out during an 18 month transition. I now have a head full of healthy natural hair. I will never go back to a relaxer.

I was supporting a loved one during a horrible bout of alopecia. We had tried everything to get her hair to grow back, because my relaxed hair was thriving thanks to boards, but her hair never improved. It was easy for me to stop relaxing after supporting her through those trials.

Oh, an I've always wanted big, thick Chaka Khan hair. My relaxed hair was never going to look like that.

I got tired of having flat, limp hair with the pain of paying high costs financially and time-wise.

I can't wait until I cut the final relaxed end.

Thinning hair, & this area that completely broke off. It looked like I shaved it or something. It would grow, but the Relaxer would always break that section off. Also, my scalp got really irritated with relaxing. I like straight hair, but I NEVER wore my hair out (I didn't like the way it looked) & when I thought of relaxing, it made me nervous like "I hope it comes out well this time."

quirkydimples said:

Duh! Just realized I misread the question. My first post and it's a fail. Sorry!

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quirkydimples LOL no worries! I do that all the time. Oh and welcome to the forum.

Thin hair and a constant irritated scalp.

Two things, first was the birth of my dd a few years ago and realizing that I had no clue how to care for her natural 4 something hair. Johnson's baby shampoo (and no f/u conditioning) left her hair dry and brittle. I took to the net, found LCHF, implemented many of the recommended pratices and viola her hair thrived and grew to unbelievale lenghts. Meanwhile on the other side of clueless, I decided to texlax my own hair after growing it to shoulder length doing C&G braids for 2 yrs which lead to massive hair breakage. Many frustrating months of trying to fix my crumbling texlaxed hair, the lightbulb finally went off -- dd's hair was thriving, mine not so much. I also thought what kind of example do i want to set for when she takes over the care of her own hair. So long story short, I am now 30 mths natural and lovin my hair. Love it. I can say with absolute certainty that I will never go back to relaxers.

I could not find a good stylist in my area and I was crap at applying a relaxer. Also my last visit to the crappy stylist she decided to pull the relaxer through my hair (thankfully I had coated my hair before I came in), but my hair broke out.

I used to watch natural hair ladies on YouTube and look at pictures on Fotki. At that time, I didn't have any intentions on going natural. I didn't think it was for me or my hair

After two years of being on this forum with limited progress I considered going natural but hadn't made a definitive decision. It was more of a passing thought. However, I decided to do a six month relaxer stretch. Well one day during month 4 of my stretch I was chillin' at home watching TV, browsing this site and YouTube. I think I saw a natural lady on TV and for whatever reason I was compelled to go to the bathroom, slather conditioner on my hair and commence to cutting. I did not plan to do this, at all. But I will say it's one of the best decisions I've made for my hair and my only regret is that I didn't do it sooner.

Tired of the perm burns, no matter how "mild" my scalp would always be on fire. I'm never going back!!!!!

LongLeggedLife said:

When I discovered it was an option. When I went to college, I finally saw real ladies with beautiful natural hair & thought 'my hair can be like that?? What have I been waiting for?!'
I was raised that a relaxer was what you were supposed to do & had never really considered the alternatives.

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This was so me! At least you figured this out when you went to college. I didn't get it until I was forty! In my head, being natural meant you had a twa or you had to keep it pressed. I didn't know naturals had options. When I started seeing coils, twists, braids, twist-outs and wash and go's I realized I could do it. I was sick of the salon. I was tired of my relaxed hair only looking good right after my appointment and I was tired of my hair getting to near shoulder length and then thinning and breaking off. I'm so glad I went natural and I wished I had done it sooner.

Somewhere around December 2003, I was combing my hair when I noticed a bald spot at the top of my head. It was in the shape and size of a nickel. I panicked and immediately called my hairstylist. He told me that he didn't know what could have caused it but I should see a dermatologist immediately. I made an appointment and a few days later was told that I was suffering from alopecia areata.

The doctor gave me a foam like medicine to put on my head for a few weeks. I did this but nothing happened so he gave me a corticosteroid injection in my head. I never felt so humiliated and broke down in my life. I cried like a baby in my car. After I gathered myself, I was determined to figure out what was going on with me and not accept discouragement. The doctor had informed me that I couldn't get a relaxer for a while so I decided to finally do what I always wanted to do...GO NATURAL!


I went to my hairstylist for a couple of months to get my hair washed and flat ironed. After a few months, my hair started to grow back. He told me that when I was ready, to let him know and he would cut off my hair all at once. I didn't have the nerve to cut all of my hair at once so I decided to transition. I transitioned not only my hair but my mind for 14 months. Some people can big chop right away, but for me I had to ready my mind so that I would never look back.

bumping...

I was tired of being dependent on relaxers and my hair was so thin. Best hair decision I ever made.

Me I just became plum lazy. I was going to stretch for 6 months then it turned into 9 months. Then I pushed it to my birthday then finally I said screw it and gave up relaxing all together. I liked the way my new growth felt. Now almost 3.5 years later I am all natural. Now all I have to do it cut off this heat damage

When the doctor told me to, my scalp was inflamed.

I first permed my hair at 12 and cut it short less than 1 year later, due to breakage, and rocked it in a short pixie cut since. At 19, I decided that I wanted to rock my natural hair. I got scalp burns from relaxers sometimes but that wasn't the reason why I wanted my natural hair. I always felt like I was dependent on the relaxer to give me curly hair (texlaxed). Also, I wanted to travel and I felt like I would SOL once my relaxer started growing out.

From the age of 19-29, I went through a cycle of shaving my head and then texlaxing after 3 months or so. I found BHM and saw all of the gorgeous heads over there. The ladies in the Natural section were so supportive that it made it easier for me to continue growing.

Since I've been on both boards, I've gained so much knowledge and confidence in my ability to grow my hair long. I've realized that my fine hair would not look very good long and relaxed. I'm hoping for long, full hair.

My decision was much like others. I was only happy with my hair in the days after getting it done. My stylist was amazing and promoted stretching and texlaxing and was the queen of customer service, but I hated my thin, dry, SL hair the rest of the time. I was programmed to think that my 4A/4B hair was supposed to always be pressed, relaxed or flat ironed into submission every day.

Secretly I always loved big curly/crinkly hair. I didn't know what to call it but as a child I would wet my Christie doll's hair in and put it in tiny braids, lay her on the air vent LOL! to dry, then release her braids for a big crinkly fro. Which is now my go to style!

In 2008, I stretched my texlax for 9 months when pregnant with DS#2. During those months I roller set, got blow outs and got kinky twists. I loved the feel of my wavy crinkly roots that I hadn't seen since I was 10. I got my last touch up in December 2008 and immediately regretted it. I decided then to stop getting a texlax and see what happened.

I transitioned for 16 months, then let go of my ends in April 2010. It was my best decision ever about my hair. My longest length is a smidge past BSL and my hair is thicker, longer and in the best condition in my adult life. LHCF has guided me every step of the way. The archives are the encyclopedia for healthy hair.

I preach the beauty of natural hair in stores, airports, at parties. I've converted family and friends who have been amazed at my progress. I love my natural hair and I can't foresee why I'd go back to relaxed when today it's been roller set, in a week it'll be in a braid and curl or a pony tail or a bun. The versatility and health of my natural hair have me hooked for life!

Enjoy the transition OP!

Thanks everyone, awesome testimonies. I'll give mine. I've never seen my hair natural for over 20 yrs. isn't that a shame? I have managed to retain length relaxed so I dont really have relaxer horror stories. One day I watched Hair Crush on YouTube. The video was something like "why I decided to go natural" my eyes were opened and I found myself agreeing wholeheartedly with everything Chime said. Down the line, maybe months ago, I watched the same video again and my attitude about my Hair started changing. Lastly, I watched fusionofcultures on YouTube do her BC and I was just amazed at how gorgeous her natural hair texture was. Now my hair is curly. I don't expect it to look like a 4a when wet. Everyone (seems like) on here runs to claim 4a but me,nah, I'm definitely 4B. No zig zag, no tight wave or curl. Fusionofcultures solidified my decision but I wanted to be sure. All of that, paired with the all of these testimonies have led me to go ahead and do it. Thanks everyone for their answers.