For people who have Big Chopped more than Once

How did you finally decide to go natural?

I feel like I'm so indecisive when it comes to my hair. I've went natural already four times in my life only to relax again. My longest natural stint was 5 years which ended when I relaxed in February of this year. I have not relaxed my hair since and I'm debating whether I should BC yet again or continue relaxing.

When I'm natural, I find it very difficult to keep my hair moisturized. I've tried everything. Trust me I've been on this forum for five years and lurked for longer. I also get very frustrated because of single strand knots. I also found that in my last year of being natural I couldn't really retain much length because of the knot issues, and I hated spending hours detangling my hair. Plus I want long hair. All these things are why I usually end up relaxing. However, I feel like I look better with natural hair.

I just feel like I should make a decision, stay natural or keep relaxing my hair and stick with it. How did you make your decision?

Maybe try texlaxing or doing mostly "out" styles: braid out,twist out, knot out. Or rod sets for awhile to make a level headed decision.

I BC'ed in June after I only transition 2 months because I was fed up. I was a little concerned about how i would look with such short hair but then I remembered I'm cute in the face!!!!

I BC'd twice and trust me I feel you a hun'ned percent on those single strand knots.

F' embracing those lil bastids. What I'm doing differently than the first time around is that once a month after washing my hair I will blow dry with the comb attachment to stretch it out and throw some twist in. I haven't noticed any heat damage, changes in my curl pattern or SSK's.

Bosinse

I heart the quote in your siggy

Crackers Phinn said:

I BC'd twice and trust me I feel you a hun'ned percent on those single strand knots.

F' embracing those lil bastids. What I'm doing differently than the first time around is that once a month after washing my hair I will blow dry with the comb attachment to stretch it out and throw some twist in. I haven't noticed any heat damage, changes in my curl pattern or SSK's.

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Amen! I don't even bother looking for them anymore....really. I'll dust regularly, and my hair is just fine.

What do I know....I BC'd twice, and ended up texturizing 3 weeks ago. Prolly would have been on my way to BSL if I'd left it alone. I just decided that I like my hair best curly, but that I needed to texturize to define the curls and kill the poof a bit. Do whatever keeps you from attacking your hair with scissors again!

The first time I big chopped was about 11 years ago. My hair was weak and a mess due to wearing braids that were too tight all the time and from stylists over processing it. I'd taken the braids out and just said "I'm done" and cut it all off. That decision was based on not knowing how to save what I had and not wanting to rely on someone else anymore.

About 2 years in or so (I didn't officially start tracking things until last year) i decided to get a texturizer because I didn't know how to handle or style my hair...I didn't know about LHCF!! I literally wore my hair in a pony tail puff all the time. The stylist did great..for about 2 years and yes he eventually over processed so that my texturizer looked like a stringy mess, had I known what I know now I could have saved my hair. Instead I went to another other stylist who cut me to chin length, processed me straight and then after about six months of doing my hair she cut it crooked...like 3inches longer on one side. So, I was done yet again!

This time however, I did more research and had found the motowngirl.com website and so gradually transitioned from crooked chin and shoulder length to below shoulder length, at which time I cut the rest off because I felt comfortable with the styles I could wear and the cut would hurt my ego The decision was based: again needing independence but also now feeling like I was equipped for a better journey.

I'd been completely natural until last summer. I loved my natural hair and felt liberated! The styles I wore we're so versatile. But, decided to relax again for several reasons after so many years.
1. I'd found LHCF and no longer viewed relaxers as the devil
2. Felt I could still be independent
3. Was migrating towards straight looks but didn't want the heat..I just needed a change...it felt right
4. My journey had become a hassle, I was doing way too much to it and making products like I was about to open a store. I still have 5 lbs of pure Shea butter in my closet!!

So long post just to say, be thoughtful about what you're after. Think about what makes sense for your lifestyle and personal level of commitment. Whether its a decision to relax or go natural just make sure YOU'RE okay with it - because you are the one that matters. So if you're undecided, just hold off

HHJ

By the way - I've learned to treat my relaxed hair like its natural - with care and have found simplicity. I'm sure that if the other factors listed had not been present I would have learned simplicity being natural as well over time.

Oh one more thing...I'd also discovered during the last natural phase that my hair thrived better when straight. May sound weird but as long as it was mostly straight I had better retention

I've BC'd numerous (about 10) times. I started back in 1999 and my last BC was 2009. The hardest part about staying natural was not knowing what to do in those in-between stages. So I would either cut again or texlax.

In 2009, I found the online community and learned tips for making through the awkward stage. That's been the most helpful for me.

GL!

What is your hair texture. Are you tightly coiled? Thick or thin strands? Density? High or low porosity (or normal)? What are some things you tried? I have been here since 05, thought I tried it all, and I'm still learning new things. Just when I thought I learned it all and failed, I revamped and remixed what everyone else is doing for my own technique. So give some more of your background and hair stats and maybe someone can chime in w/tips.

caliscurls said:

Oh one more thing...I'd also discovered during the last natural phase that my hair thrived better when straight. May sound weird but as long as it was mostly straight I had better retention

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@caliscurls, Thank you for saying that. You confirmed a new theory I have. I think my hair grows longest straight, period. I'm texlaxed, been wearing '-out' styles since I joined the board. Yet, after 3 years of being on a hhj and somewhat decent practices to start with, tbh, I still had the same 'w' breakage at the hemline I had in 09!

That was the beginning of the summer, May-ish. Since then, I've been wearing it straightER (still no heat, though) and dusting every month and, look!, better retention. I just wasted 3 years.

hth @Bosinse (oh, and yes, I've bc'd twice, both times to show my length )

haha i bc'ed in '08, who know what my hair length would have been by now? it's like i learn something new and important about natural hair everyday, and then i go "OH i could've done that to prevent this!" like solving a hard math problem that you guessed on your final only after you left the building.