My new friend said....

lana · Jul 11, 2007

My new friend said that she loves my hair and she just wants to rip it out when I'm not looking.

I was stunned. We were riding together in my car and I had both hands on the wheel but I looked at her like she was crazy and gave a nervous laugh. Really I wanted to reach out for a weapon.

What is wrong with her for saying this? Am I just taking it the wrong way? Because she put her hand in my hair and pulled it later on that day. I'm not joking! I almost slapped her.

We went out and had a drink and we had a nice time together. But this girl might be a trip. What? Am I overreacting?

I don't have many female friends my own age (I have two close female friends that are a lot older). I was hoping to get to know her better since she's only a few years older than me...now I'm hesitant.

ThursdayGirl · Jul 11, 2007

lana said:
My new friend said that she loves my hair and she just wants to rip it out when I'm not looking.

I was stunned. We were riding together in my car and I had both hands on the wheel but I looked at her like she was crazy and gave a nervous laugh. Really I wanted to reach out for a weapon.

What is wrong with her for saying this? Am I just taking it the wrong way? Because she put her hand in my hair and pulled it later on that day. I'm not joking! I almost slapped her.

We went out and had a drink and we had a nice time together. But this girl might be a trip. What? Am I overreacting?

I don't have many female friends my own age (I have two close female friends that are a lot older). I was hoping to get to know her better since she's only a few years older than me...now I'm hesitant.

What a weird occurrence. Do you think she's insinuating that you have a weave? Maybe that tug was a weave-check? or is she just a crazy/playful friend. I think I would distance myself from her. That's a really weird/violent thing to say to a "friend".

Hidden_Angel · Jul 11, 2007

Wow, honestly it truely depends on the matter of way she spoke it. Does she have a past history of doing rather Ubseen things? I would have said "Are you kidding me?" Honestly and if your still feeling scared I'd say wear your hair UP AROUND HER so if you feel any hands you know its her!

sunnydaze · Jul 11, 2007

I see her as complimenting you and she was making a joke.

crlsweetie912 · Jul 11, 2007

I just think that she was saying that she was envious (but in a positive way). Like I could say that I wanted dlewis' hair and would rip it out if I had to, but not literally, just meaning that I love her hair. I hope that makes sense!

lana · Jul 11, 2007

I just found it strange. We were talking about hair and I was telling her it's my favorite subject. She was asking how I got my hair so thick, what I do and I was hesitant to say too much because I have found that if people really want to know they'll ask for details. I just lightly explained that I do my own texlax and trims.

Then she said "It's so thick, I just want to rip your hair out." I think she was playing, but I just don't play like that. I'm quick to find fault with people, I'm working on that, and I'm quick to throw people "away" if they offend me and I'm working on that too. Cause I'm not perfect myself (laughs).

But I'm just protective of my hair, as I should be and I don't want to be friends with jealous females. She has "okay" hair.

My hair really doesn't look like a weave, although three people I saw recently did ask me if it's a weave, I guess it's really thick, but I'm a 4a/b - what do they expect? (laughs)

gimbap · Jul 11, 2007

sunnydaze said:
I see her as complimenting you and she was making a joke.

That's what I think too. I wouldn't take her comment that seriously.

KnottyGurl · Jul 11, 2007

Maybe she wanted to rip your hair off and put it on her head *shrug* The tug she gave your hair later did seem like a weave check, but I would make sure she knew that I don't just let people put their hands in my w/o being asked. Anyway, if bothered you that much, I would just casually ask her what she meant by it. Otherwise, I would just blow it off, but keep my eyes and ears open for any other strange behavior. :ohwell:

kittenz · Jul 11, 2007

lana said:
My new friend said that she loves my hair and she just wants to rip it out when I'm not looking.

I was stunned. We were riding together in my car and I had both hands on the wheel but I looked at her like she was crazy and gave a nervous laugh. Really I wanted to reach out for a weapon.

What is wrong with her for saying this? Am I just taking it the wrong way? Because she put her hand in my hair and pulled it later on that day. I'm not joking! I almost slapped her.

We went out and had a drink and we had a nice time together. But this girl might be a trip. What? Am I overreacting?

I don't have many female friends my own age (I have two close female friends that are a lot older). I was hoping to get to know her better since she's only a few years older than me...now I'm hesitant.

Okay is it just me or was this funny to you too. :lachen:

Me and my friends play like this all the time. Maybe it's because we've been friends for a while but I would assume she was joking. If you don't like your touched you should tell her. One of my BF never liked her being touched and she just told me (but I can get away with it now), she's natural. I'd say something like that as a compliment meaning I wanted your hair for myself and the tug would have been an inside joke a little later.

Hidden_Angel · Jul 11, 2007

lana said:
I just found it strange. We were talking about hair and I was telling her it's my favorite subject. She was asking how I got my hair so thick, what I do and I was hesitant to say too much because I have found that if people really want to know they'll ask for details. I just lightly explained that I do my own texlax and trims.

Then she said "It's so thick, I just want to rip your hair out." I think she was playing, but I just don't play like that. I'm quick to find fault with people, I'm working on that, and I'm quick to throw people "away" if they offend me and I'm working on that too. Cause I'm not perfect myself (laughs).

But I'm just protective of my hair, as I should be and I don't want to be friends with jealous females. She has "okay" hair.

My hair really doesn't look like a weave, although three people I saw recently did ask me if it's a weave, I guess it's really thick, but I'm a 4a/b - what do they expect? (laughs)

Ya, my hair is 4a's/4b/ish and its really thick so I know what you mean. but my sister says stuff about other girls hair all the time. I think she was just joking though

bludacious · Jul 11, 2007

Sounds to me as a compliment accompanied by a joke. Personally, I think you are reading too much into it...

lana · Jul 11, 2007

crlsweetie912 said:
I just think that she was saying that she was envious (but in a positive way). Like I could say that I wanted dlewis' hair and would rip it out if I had to, but not literally, just meaning that I love her hair. I hope that makes sense!

Good that's what I was hoping. I'm really trying not to nitpick with people. Cause then you end up with no friends. I like her and we get along well. So I'll just kinda be careful around her and listen to what she says.

IF she says anything else crazy...I'm going to say "What do you mean?" That's not too rude and it isn't offensive.

sunnydaze · Jul 11, 2007

After reading your last post, I still stand by what I said. Her humor just may not be your kind of humor.

IMO, most women who truly hate say nothing while staring hard or say something completely ridiculous.

My sister has a friend with absolutely gorgeous long thick texlaxed hair that always looks like what macherieamour calls "Victoria's Secret" hair. When I am around her I find myself always in a trance by how pretty her hair is. I remember saying something to my sister like " I just want to yank that hair out of her hair". She was like "I know, right?". She knew that I was just saying her hair was incredibly beautiful and that's all.

guesswho · Jul 11, 2007

lana said:
I just found it strange. We were talking about hair and I was telling her it's my favorite subject. She was asking how I got my hair so thick, what I do and I was hesitant to say too much because I have found that if people really want to know they'll ask for details. I just lightly explained that I do my own texlax and trims.

Then she said "It's so thick, I just want to rip your hair out." I think she was playing, but I just don't play like that. I'm quick to find fault with people, I'm working on that, and I'm quick to throw people "away" if they offend me and I'm working on that too. Cause I'm not perfect myself (laughs).

But I'm just protective of my hair, as I should be and I don't want to be friends with jealous females. She has "okay" hair.

My hair really doesn't look like a weave, although three people I saw recently did ask me if it's a weave, I guess it's really thick, but I'm a 4a/b - what do they expect? (laughs)

Ok as you said above and I quote "you are quick to find faults in people and throw people away I'm glad you admitted and said you are working on it

But don't throw her away my friends say thoses things constantly and I know its a compliment its just playing and based on how you explained it was definitely a compliment, so keep her as a friend unless we see the news and she's dragging you by your hair up some block I say its cool

bludacious · Jul 11, 2007

lana said:
Good that's what I was hoping. I'm really trying not to nitpick with people. Cause then you end up with no friends. I like her and we get along well. So I'll just kinda be careful around her and listen to what she says.

IF she says anything else crazy...I'm going to say "What do you mean?" That's not too rude and it isn't offensive.

I have a question. You said you like her friendship and you all get along well. So, why would you even question her? Do you even slightly think this girl will just up and yank your hair out? Please don't take offense to my opinion but I think that would be a little nitpicky. Good friends are hard to come around especially one who compliments you on your progress.

lana · Jul 11, 2007

guesswho said:
Ok as you said above and I quote "you are quick to find faults in people and throw people away I'm glad you admitted and said you are working on it
But don't throw her away my friends say thoses things constantly and I know its a compliment its just playing and based on how you explained it was definitely a compliment, so keep her as a friend unless we see the news and she's dragging you by your hair up some block I say its cool

Girl you had me cracking up. Yeah I try to be polite and sweet all the time cause that's how I was raised, but I think other people should be like that and it's just not fair. I'm working on being more "myself" and not just my mama's daughter. The truth is sometimes I don't feel like being polite or sweet. I like being real so I want to accept other people as they are too. That's why I'm checking with ya'll. I know you'll keep me real. :kiss:

Maynard · Jul 11, 2007

I have said something similar to someone in a joking manner!

I told her I want to take her hair out and glue it to my head, so I can smack folks in the face with my hair...

I hope she didnt get offended....I did laugh after I said it though....

I wouldn't take it seriously, she just has a strange way of complimenting you...

CurliDiva · Jul 11, 2007

Give her the benefit of doubt and assume that she meant it as a JOKE!

but watch her.....

PaperClip · Jul 11, 2007

CurliDiva said:
Give her the benefit of doubt and assume that she meant it as a JOKE!

but watch her.....

Exactly....

victorious · Jul 11, 2007

Bun it if you still feel uneasy until you get a better sense of her humor (since your friendship is new and all).

I say crazy stuff to my friends a lot, and they know I'm being silly.

sareca · Jul 11, 2007

I don't like the "rip your hair out" comments.

tnorenberg · Jul 11, 2007

sareca said:
I don't like the "rip your hair out" comments.

Same here. I don't play like that! Maybe she was joking...keep one hand free around her in case she needs to be smacked to her senses.. :grin:

No seriously.

MizAvalon · Jul 11, 2007

sareca said:
I don't like the "rip your hair out" comments.

Neither do I. :nono:

PapillionRouge · Jul 11, 2007

I think she was just playing with u....

Blackoutzangel05 · Jul 11, 2007

Am I strange cuz I would have taken it like a compliment and jokingly said to her, "yeah just don't let me find you with a lock of my hair in your hand...its gonna be on" :lol:

I believe she was just letting you know that she really liked your hair....but as for the touching, I don't like people touching my hair....period :ohwell:

But that is just me..well I do love my man running his hands through it and stroking it but that is something totally different.. :grin:

XXXtacy · Jul 11, 2007

sareca said:
I don't like the "rip your hair out" comments.

Well, I am glad you and a few others didn't like that comment. I really don't like that kinda talk at all.

That is crazy talk. I don't play with people when they are talking about me and ripping, tearing, slapping, beating, etc in the same sentence. If you feel uncomfortable, then I would definitely pull back and watch her or even discuss this with her. Tell crazy girl, you don't play like that and it makes you uncomfortable. That's is some straight up crazy mess.

We often find ourselves in craziness when we don't put that kinda thing in check.

I don't play with crazy, medicated or home grown.

chocolate01 · Jul 11, 2007

I would probaly take it as a joke. My cousin did the same thing to me. We were in the car and she's like I can't believe how long your hair is now, you chopped it off 2 years ago, I feel like cutting it off because i'm so disgusted by how long it is. Now she was laughing as she said this, I thought it was funny too.

sugarose · Jul 11, 2007

I think it probably was a joke unless you notice she is doing other weird things. I have heard people say things like this before but they were just joking.

DDTexlaxed · Jul 11, 2007

Yeah, sounds kinda creepy! :shocked:

I'd keep an eye on ol' girl when you're around her. If u feel uneasy, remember that. Never ignore the first impression because people usually show who they are the first time you meet. I really do hope she's kidding...

erplexed

DivaRox · Jul 11, 2007

My first thought was :eek:

, but when you balance the one comment with the other positive things you said about her, including calling her a new friend rather than a coworker, associate or something else, I'd say she may just have a zanier sense of humor than what you're used to and this was just a backhanded compliment.

My friend of 15+years has gorgeous midback hair and gets a lot of flack from women for her hair. The ones that truly are hating on her usually are doing so silently with the crazy looks and the rolling eyes and the "who does she think she is" when they get far enough away. The ones who really love her hair(like me) will make comments to let her know we love her hair and yes we wish we had it but are not threatening bodily harm. Crazy folx don't normally announce what they're gonna do to you right? Usually seemingly "normal" people are the ones who will bust out of the blue doing crazy ish and everybody around them will say, oh they seemed so nice. All that to say, she still sounds like a keeper. You'll be able to gauge from her future comments that she makes to you and in reference to other people if she should really be cut loose.

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