To all veteran self-relaxers

Hi,

I have just moved 3,000 miles away from my hairstylist of 9 years and I am not ready to be worried whether a new one will get scissor-happy on me, etc. I am ready to relax my own hair, but I need some tips and encouragement to get over the fear that I am going to burn all my hair off. To those who do it yourselves: do you get help, or if not, how do you do it on your own? Any help regarding your methods or do's and dont's would be greatly appreciated. And, if this is a post that has been done by someone else already, I would appreciate the link also. Thank you so much for your help. I know they come with instructions, but is there something that the instructions didn't lay out that you had to learn yourselves?

Hoping for a response...(is there a begging Graemlin?)

Does no-one do their own, or is it so easy that it bears no explanation and I am just worrying over nothing? Or should I just find a salon? Any suggestions?

I prefer to have my friend relax my hair but because I travel so much sometimes I am forced to do it myself. Just make sure you have everything you need (applicator brush etc.) so you will not have to stop at anytime during the process. Make sure you have a good stand up mirror so you can see the back of your hair as you apply the relaxer. I base my scalp & hairline really good. Because my hair is thicker in the middle and I burn easier on the edges, I section my hair into six sections, three on each side. And start with the middle section on one side and then the middle section on the other side. Using the tail of the applicator brush I section the hair into smaller sections and apply the relaxer to the new growth. The key is to move as quickly as possible to prevent the relaxer from sitting too long on those first sections.

I have noticed on the board that some people even relax 1/2 their hair one day and the other 1/2 the following day, because it can be a tedious process.

Good luck, with practice you will get the hang of it. If possible have someone their with you the first time you try it so, they can let you know if you are missing sections or if you are overlapping the relaxer onto the already relaxed hair.

Thank you so much!!!! I travel a lot as well and have often been overseas when I needed a relaxer and had to wait to return stateside because I do not know how to do it myself. I no longer want to be crippled by not having this ability. Your response is very helpful, encouraging and MUCH APPRECIATED.

Well here are my suggestions (only have a few):
1.Base your hair very well, in my opinion this was the most time consuming because I swear, I would try to cover every inch of scalp, ears and neck. You will prob. need more petroleum or scalp protectant that the relaxer kit will give you.
2. Use a timer, use a timer, use a timer! or better yet, use two! Your hair should have all the relaxer applied to it within 7 or 8min, and the rest of the time you should smooth it out and let it sit UP TO THE MAX TIME. I never went past the 15 min. my hair had to take, EVER.
3. Rinse your hair with warm water for at least 5 continous minutes BEFORE you shampoo. This is also tedious but I never got burns on my scalp or overprocessed until the one time I didn't do my usual 5 min.
4. Shampoo 2 or 3(pref.3) times with neutralizing shampoo and 1 time with your fave. moisturizing shampoo. Rinse VERY WELL after each shampoo.
5. Condition with a deep conditioner in addition to or instead of the conditioner they give you in the kit.

6. Lastly, get a real box of latex gloves (like medical supply ones)....the things they give you in the kits are useless.

As you can see, my relaxing my hair would take a good while but I think that taking my time to do all these things helped me get to and maintain my length for all those years of relaxing. If you look at my old pic in the link below, my hair was that long after 7 or 8 years of my relaxing my hair all by myself.

Good luck to you!

I'm a veteran renegade relaxer: I don't use gloves, I don't base (I use no-lye), I don't use a clock/timer and I don't use neutralizing poo. I DO relax my hair from beginning to end all by myself and basically employ the same principles some others mentioned. I part my hair in three sections: two ponytails on each side of my head and one in the back. Then I start to perm each section. I simply put the perm on the new growth (I do not smooth at this time). I do all sections, BUT I DO NOT DO MY EDGES UNTIL LAST! For me, my edges and my kitchen will burn quickly if I do them first. Only after I've done my whole head AND gone back and smoothed, do I do my edges/kitchen. Then I rinse out.

You can definitely perm your own head w/o losing any hair. Like someone else mentioned, make sure you have everything in front of you, readily available: gloves, poo, etc.

What are you neutralizing your hair wih, Dolce Dawn?

Dolce, you said that you don't use a neutralizing shampoo? What do you use to neutralize then?

I would also recc. leaving in the neutralizing shampoo for about 2-5 minutes (2nd or 3rd wash). I read somewhere that this gives it time for the neutralizing shampoo to work it's way into the cortex as well. That way your sure that it's neutralized on the outside as well as the inside.

Suggestions
- To avoid overlapping, put vaseline on the already relaxed hair
- If you have thick hair, it might be a good idea to relax the hair in halves. My hair is thick and coily & I cannot effectively apply the relaxer comb through the new growth in 15 minutes
- After rinsing, put conditioner for about 2 minutes before using a neutralizing shampoo.
- When checking to see if relaxed, don't just go by what your hair feels like. I've used motions, and when I touched my new growth, it FELT relaxed, but actually was only texturized, so use your eyes too, not just your hand.

Don't be discouraged if things don't work out exactly as planned. The more you do it, the more you'll get better. I self-relaxed for about 9 months and even though I under processed my hair, it is thicker than it's ever been, so don't give up. Good luck!

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UmSumayyah said:
What are you neutralizing your hair wih, Dolce Dawn?

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UmSumayyah and Honi-

I don't use neutralizing poo b/c it's too harsh on my hair; my hair feels like sandpaper afterwards. When I relax, I use regular poo (Garnier & KeraCare) and then use my Porosity Control conditioner.

You might be thinking, "Okay, this girl has GOT to be bald!" But I'm not. And I'm not saying neutralizing poo is bad, but by nature it stops the chemical process in its tracks and that leaves my hair traumatized. I'd rather gradually stop the process by rinsing thoroughly and using regular poo.

Wow,

Thank you all so much!!!! I think that I am ready to free myself from the tyranny of the hairdresser. I only go to the salon every 2 months anyway to get my retouch so I stopped seeing the point of being so dependent on a person whom I see so infrequently. Armed with all of your suggestions, I feel ready to go it on my own. Now, I have to pick a relaxer---ugggh! More decisions, but you all have helped A LOT. I feel much encouraged!

good luck. i too am a newbie who did my first 2 months ago. All in all it came out well, even though i underprocessed. but to me that is better than overprocessed. i am hoping that it will get better next time

Thanks! Good luck to you, too, on your next go round. How long do you usually wait in between? The longest I have gone is 10 weeks. I generally go every 8 weeks like clockwork. Since I will be doing myself, I might try to space it out...don't know yet.

now that I'm texturized, I plan on doing my own touch-ups.
from many of the tips here, I will be using:
*conditioner on my hair to base the already texturized parts
*mix 1/2 conditioner with the lye relaxer to help evne further with preventing overlapping
*use the basing brush as well as gloves and definitely a timer
*definitely use a neutralizing shampoo for at least 3 times followed by a deep conditioner
*start with coarser/hard to relax sections first


B/c I'm texturizing, I only will be leaving it on for no more than 5 minutes - but since you are relaxing for a straighter finish, I would suggest only going to the max. it says on the container

Hope this helps!

Yes, it does help. Thanks!

i hope everything works out check out my hair album.
http://public.fotki.com/honey04/honey04_hairalbum/ pw smile
leave a comment ill respond.1

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UmSumayyah and Honi-

I don't use neutralizing poo b/c it's too harsh on my hair; my hair feels like sandpaper afterwards. When I relax, I use regular poo (Garnier & KeraCare) and then use my Porosity Control conditioner.


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Probably the Porosity Control conditioner is neutralizing your hair. To make hair more porous or give it elasticty the hair's ph needs to be lowered so most products like this have a ph 5 or lower. Which if that is the case it would give the same result as if you used a neutralizing shampoo. I'm glad you found something that will neutralize your hair without striping it.

Here are the instructions I made for myself in regards relaxing. Even thou I've done my hair for years I still pull this out and go by it word for word so as not to forget anything:

1. Apply Vaseline to your scalp

2. Section the front of your hair from the back. Cover the back with plastic then a scarf it should come down behind your ears like little red ridding hood LOL.

3. Put Motions Moisture Plus Conditioner on the dry already relaxed hair. It has a low ph that will neutralize any relax that gets on the hair you want to protect. (It doesn't matter if you use another relaxer you still can use the Moitions, I like Hawaiian Silky).

4. Relax the front section of your hair only and rinse.

5. Apply the neutralizing shampoo to the front of your head, shampoo and rinse. Apply the neutralizer again and rinse

6. Use either Revlon Realistic Normalizing Rinse or Sea Breeze apply and wait one minute then rinse. (it will give you back elasticity, plus pervent possible scabs although it may ouch a little, trust me it works []).

7. Then apply Motions Moisture Plus conditioner to the entire front half of your hair. Leave it on while you relax the back about 10-20 minutes.

8. Follow steps 2-7, You will have to rinse your entire head to get rid of the relaxer but thats okay simply make sure to follow step 6-7 for the back.

10. Use any other conditioner you like and Style as normal.

As you do your hair take notes, what worked for you what didn't ect. As time goes on you can refer back to them and notice anything you may need to change.

Let us know what happens!