Abstinence Challenge 365, 24-7

[phynestone]

I wish I could say the same. I know couple after couple who did the do regularly before getting married and they still are, happily. Maybe they went through things I'm not aware of, but it can be discouraging to know that I waited (barely) before marrying only to marry the devil incarnate and end up divorced anyway. I mean, I saved myself, and here I am, divorced.

I don't want to get anybody down but all I would say is not to look at others. When I look at others, I get angry and question God. I start wondering what was the point of waiting when I didn't get a reward for saving myself, I got a painful, horrible marriage and years of misery.

That said, I'm still saving myself for re-marriage, if only to strengthen and purify my mind and spirit. Knowing that I am sacrificing daily to resist temptation makes me less willing to fall for some dude who can't wait for me. I did buy that ring to celebrate a year and it reminds me that what I am saving is precious and valuable. Prayerfully my next husband will be my final one, and my latter will be GREATER than my former!!!

This spoke to me. I can name a few ladies who went through the same thing. I wonder why is that.

I can't relate, but I just want you to know that I HEARD you.

 

[stephluv]

its time for me!! I would love to join if I can...i know its his will and his way.

 

[blackbarbietea]

There should also be a focus on NO MASTURBATION

 

[blackbarbietea]

Anywho's I'd LOVE to join!!

 

[blackbarbietea]

Lord I haven't laid with a man in about 5 years..however the self laying is another story..I wonder if it's possible to break..scratch that I know it's possible to break I just wonder if Im ready..I mean I met a nice guy Friday not saying anything will come of it since his technically taken but he said he can only hold out for 3 months..I was like wow that doesn't match my thoughts unless we are married in that time frame..I need help ladies..

44

LOL What's technically taken? That should be a big neon sign right there.

 

[blackbarbietea]

It will be one year in 13 days. I am really committed to doing this. No going back now. I am not giving myself to anyone without the promise of marriage. Period. When I think about time I lost with a man that I knew wasn't going to marry me, but I had to prove everyone wrong; I get mad. I get really angry, but I hold on to faith that the right man will come along, and will want to be with me for me, and will be just what I have been waiting for. I hear moonstone is for purity. I know I am not pure or anything like that, but the symbolism is enough for me.

If you're a christian, if you believe Jesus died on the cross and rose again. Then when you sin, if you repent, God forgives you and whipes your slate clean. You are pure. We all deal with struggles and things like that, but the important thing is to no matter what, get up, whipe yourself off, repent and move on. Satan will try to get you to sin, and if you should fall into sin, then he will try to tell you that you are so dirty, and you shouldn't repent. or ask for forgiveness again. That's a trap. Please don't believe the lie that you're impure. Read your bible, pray, fall in love with Jesus, seek his face and you won't be able to believe how far he can take you. It's all about renewing your mind. <3

 

[blackbarbietea]

Sigh....

I'm writing because I was tested last night. I almost gave in but thankfully God kept me strong and I walked away a winner. However, I am disappointed that I placed myself in a situation where I was tested. I knew better but for some reason my good judgment didn't kick in fast enough. I'm a little sad right now but I'm trying to hold on to the lesson I learned. God showed me a weakness that I didn't know I had and he also showed me that His power was strong enough to keep my from tripping over my weakness. Please pray that God will keep me focused and help me strengthen all areas where I am weak. I'm praying for myself and for all of you ladies. Happy New Year!

Don't let guilt cause you to fall. Ask for forgiveness, repent, and move on and don't ever let yourself get into a situation like that again. Analyze the small steps you and he took to get to that almost point and be a stickler and don't go that way again. <3

 

[blackbarbietea]

in an effort to stay faithful to the Lord and prevent lust, etc, etc, I actually napped with a pillow between my boyfriend's "manhood" and my bum today lol he didnt say anything but he was probably to tired to care lol

eh...im glad you're trying, but don't you think thats still kinda playing with fire, napping with your bf in the same bed?

 

[Curly CoCo]

I am seriously thinking about quitting this challenge, Im so confused. In a way I dont because I've been a virgin all my life..

 

[LovingLady]

I am seriously thinking about quitting this challenge, Im so confused. In a way I dont because I've been a virgin all my life..

Don't quite now, you have come so far.

 

[Curly CoCo]

^^ Thanks. I don't believe dat I will quit, maybe Im just speaking out of frustration. It's like I dont want to disappoint God but I'm not sure if I made the right decision by taking a pledge of abstinence at a young age. I can't help but feel like I'm missing out on something though.

 

[Vonnieluvs08]

^^ Thanks. I don't believe dat I will quit, maybe Im just speaking out of frustration. It's like I dont want to disappoint God but I'm not sure if I made the right decision by taking a pledge of abstinence at a young age. I can't help but feel like I'm missing out on something though.

Curly CoCo- You aren't missing out on anything. Honestly!

I know you're like well you did the deed but honestly I wish I had waited. And to top it off I got HPV from my bf of the time and didn't even know and we were safe. That was just the first of a few health problems I've had because of sex. I still am nervous that I may have contracted something more deadly despite all my healthy tests. If I had never done it I wouldn't be paranoid. One day I have to tell my future husband all this and pray he will still marry me and us be able to have a healthy marriage.

Also every time you engage in sex or intimacy with another person you give them a piece of yourself. Yes Christ can restore us but that is still a part of you that another person has shared. You will have to build all of that back up with your future husband. And women like to compare everything (clothes, bodies, partners) and you don't wanna have that mental turmoil if your husband doesn't live up to previous lovers.

If I could do that part of my life over I would have waited until marriage like I originally planned.

 

[Curly CoCo]

^^ Thanks very much for sharing that story. It's people like you that get me inspired to keep the precious gift of virginity that God have given me. It helps me see that it would be well worth the wait, so I won't give up or quit da challenge. Im in it to win it! lol

 

[LovinLocks]

In the name of my Lord, Jesus Christ, I confess the need to live a God-filled life in chasteness and full morality and that as a Christian my light is to shine as a Godly woman participating in Proverbs 15:20. I have years of uncleanness in God's eyes to overcome in this regard. In faith I ask for help from Holy Spirit to live up to my dedication. Amen!

Ladies, work it, in Christ's name. Gather your prayer warriors - whatever you need to be victorious in your walks of celibacy. This is the first time in my life that I am SERIOUSLY making this an integral part of myself. I have seen the ravages of ignoring God's physical and spiritual laws and the BUCK STOPS HERE, in Jesus' name. Obviously can't do it on my own, but through him I can do all things . . . as the scripture says.

 

[LovinLocks]

There should also be a focus on NO MASTURBATION

EXACTLY!!! I am so glad this challenge includes the real 'cause there's no need in us half stepping. It is so difficult to explain to folk why masturbation is a no-no too. Let's keep walkin' this walk ladies!

 

[Curly CoCo]

Hope u ladies are doin ok.

 

[blackbarbietea]

It's hard once you get started and unfortunate for most people, they start (masturbating) as such a young age.

 

[NaturallySweet73]

This wont' be an issue for me............lol IM IN!!!!! Ill be watching my back though or allowing the Lord to watch it b/c of this challenge I have been celebit for 6 years now, not through my own power by with the help of God!


@ all those that do have issues with this and who have issues with masterbation...........Pray, prayer, prayer(Mark 13:38;Matthew 26:41 Prayer gives you the strenghth to resist temptation) , Word, Word, Word (Ephesians 5:26 The Word ofGod Cleanses your mind daily so we have to be in it daily), fasting, fasting, fasting (Matthew 17:21; Mark 9:29 when we are having a heck of a time stopping ourselves the best thing to do is to FAST, b/c there may be more going on the the Lord needs to conquer our flesh)............you might also want to dump shows, movies, conversation, jokes and music that refer to sexual themes! I was/ and could be a trigger!

But the more you are in you word and prayer the less even the thoughts will trouble you and i speak from experience.

 

[softblackcotton]

I'm a 26 year old virgin who has never had a real relationship, so my life has been an Abstinence Challege 365, 24-7 by default. This is going to be a piece of lemon cake.

 

[hairluva28]

I am in. I have tried multiple times to be abstinent in the past but wasn't really committed. I have now gone a year without dating or sexual contact. I am more committed now than I have ever been and am determined to stay absstinent for God's glory. I'm reading a great book that's helping me BOUNDARIES IN DATING. Its a christian book about dating in a Godly way, a must have!!!

 

[phynestone]

^^^^Awesome book! Very helpful.

 

[KynkiChyck]

Keepin courtship alive...

Checkin' back in...and WHEW!

Only from the grace of the Lord Jesus I have made the 4 1/2 year mark of abstaining...I am proud of my success of not giving in to emotion, the devil and my physical urges.

On the other hand, I'm upset. :heated:

WHY?

I tire of defending my stance on sex b4 marriage...when I was reaching my four year mark I told two close females that I abstained...girlfriends just about lost their minds and stated they couldn't imagine going 4 weeks w/o it... but in the end I think they felt awkward bout it...the one started treating me different afterwards, and she has no prob dressing scandulous to get a man (and still doesn't have one) . If more women would exercise self-control ; the power that we possess over men, there would not be so much promiscuity going around...then again maybe they think like frogs http://www.physorg.com/news/2011-02-promiscuity-frog-world.html

There was a highly educated brother (former co-worker) who was attracted to me holding a high adminstrative position in a church. I started making convo w/him primarily because he was saved (but found out later he was engaged). He flat told me there was no way he would hold out til marriage...

It seems like the epitome of everyday is immorale..."do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law" :mob: is the modern day definition of virtue, purity. It sure would be nice to conversate with a man who truly loves the LORD JESUS and has the utmost respect for a woman.

Though I speak out in frustration let's keep our virtue to the sky so He can fulfill our desire for a godly man.

 

[Renewed1]

Re: Keepin courtship alive...

It sure would be nice to conversate with a man who truly loves the LORD JESUS and has the utmost respect for a woman.

I so agree. It's almost like a dime a dozen to speak to a man that WANTS to talk about God AND wants to wait until marriage for sex.

 

[stephluv]

Re: Keepin courtship alive...

I so agree. It's almost like a dime a dozen to speak to a man that WANTS to talk about God AND wants to wait until marriage for sex.

^^^^ITA Just praying and enjoying myself has been helping me alot

 

[stephluv]

Re: Keepin courtship alive...

Checkin' back in...and WHEW!

Only from the grace of the Lord Jesus I have made the 4 1/2 year mark of abstaining...I am proud of my success of not giving in to emotion, the devil and my physical urges.

On the other hand, I'm upset. :heated:

WHY?

I tire of defending my stance on sex b4 marriage...when I was reaching my four year mark I told two close females that I abstained...girlfriends just about lost their minds and stated they couldn't imagine going 4 weeks w/o it... but in the end I think they felt awkward bout it...the one started treating me different afterwards, and she has no prob dressing scandulous to get a man (and still doesn't have one) . If more women would exercise self-control ; the power that we possess over men, there would not be so much promiscuity going around...then again maybe they think like frogs http://www.physorg.com/news/2011-02-promiscuity-frog-world.html

There was a highly educated brother (former co-worker) who was attracted to me holding a high adminstrative position in a church. I started making convo w/him primarily because he was saved (but found out later he was engaged). He flat told me there was no way he would hold out til marriage...

It seems like the epitome of everyday is immorale..."do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law" :mob: is the modern day definition of virtue, purity. It sure would be nice to conversate with a man who truly loves the LORD JESUS and has the utmost respect for a woman.

Though I speak out in frustration let's keep our virtue to the sky so He can fulfill our desire for a godly man.

I really needed to read this

 

[DaiseeDay]

I'm in.

I've never had sexual intercourse, never even had a boyfriend, but I haven't always been exactly pure. I dedicated my life to God about two and a half years ago and set myself apart for Him and I'm waiting for the one He's chosen for me. I don't believe in dating like the rest of the world either - it's kinda personal to me though because I believe God has revealed who He wants me to marry - which makes waiting for him even harder. I have struggled with some things, but I trust God to help me through them. I've wanted to give up at times especially going through High School, I've wanted to just date any ol guy who showed me attention, but I know that's not what God wants for me, so that would be wrong. Part of my motivation is seeing some men that are "Christians", but so un-godly and disrespectful that it's hard to believe they actually have a relationship with the Lord. It's like God puh-leez have a godly husband out there for me, I can't marry a guy like that! On the other hand I've met a handful of men who really are in love with the Lord and it's really awesome to know that there really are real men still out there these days and God has one set-apart for me.

This website is awesome for those of us struggling with lust and other sexual sins: http://beggarsdaughter.com/

Right now I'm going through Pure by Rebecca St.James (she wrote and sings the song "Wait For Me" ) and I'm loving it. It's about purity inside and out and being set-apart for God. I find it especially encouraging because I know she's been waiting and walking the walk and now she just got married this year!

-Praying and trusting the Lord for my future husband.

 

[LovelyNaps26]

joining . i need to keep my thoughts pure. i'm still a virgin but impure thoughts are something i struggle with. i've been dating a great Christian guy which has made keeping my thoughts pure even more difficult Paul is right it is better to marry than to burn. Still I believe discipline will help me if and when i marry this young man.

 

[Prudent1]

Hello all! I scan this part of the forum from time to time just to see how everybody is doing. Let me say that this section as well as the CF was the reason I decided to join the forum at all. It was about much more than the hair. Anyway, I pray for all of us and would be totally remiss if I did not share something with you beautiful ladies. I have been listening to an excellent series call The New Rules for Love, Sex, and Dating as taught by Andy Stanley. The entire series is awesome but if you can't listen to anything else, please take the time to listen to part 3 which specifically addresses singles. I believe you will find it very uplifting. Stay strong beautiful women of God. :Rose:
http://www.northpoint.org/messages/the-new-rules-for-love-sex-and-dating

 

[bajandoc86]

I'm most definitely in this challenge!!

 

[Babi]

The only reason I subscribed to LHCF is because I was feeling the topics and the support system that you ladies have on here. This is my second post. I am in. I m really feeling the Christian Fellowship group!
I recently broke up with my boyfriend because he doesn't support my desire to abstain from fornication in order to better my walk in Christ. ( ladies check out the post if you'de like. I need all the advice I could get from fellow christians on that).