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Black Woman Killed After Giving Money To Pandhandler

chocolat79

Well-Known Member
Thankfully, I haven’t had terrible experiences with panhandlers, but one time in ATL, I was going to give this BM some money because it was my last day going to that job and he was at that intersection, but as I was getting ready to roll down my window, he walks toward me with his crayon out and stared at me. Since then, no one gets nada. I live in SoCal now and these crazy expensive taxes we pay gonna have to suffice.

SF panhandlers are crazy bold. I like visiting the city, but anywhere around Union Sq is too much
 

Ms. Tarabotti

Well-Known Member
May that poor woman R.I.P. Here in NYC you see some of the same people panhandling for years. The worse is when your in a store or the bank. I used to give food and not money. I had bad experiences where I got cussed out in union square in frisco. And I never roll down a car window, and all doors stay locked.

Nope, don't give to anybody. All car doors are locked and money is put away before leaving any establishment.

I hear the same stories year after year, each time embellishing a little more to gain sympathy. I remember seeing this guy walking jerkily through the cars asking for money for 'his condition'. At one stop, he got off and walked smoothly out the door- so much for his condition.
 

Everything Zen

Well-Known Member
I felt guilty for ignoring this BW outside of Walgreens last week who tried to interrupt me when I was on the phone (it’s my signature move to avoid panhandlers, beggars, etc. bc in general it’s rude as hell to interrupt someone’s conversation) trying to beg for something. It was just one of those days where EVERYONE is demanding something from you, it was late and I just wanted to get home. After this thread my conscience is clear. :yep:
 

cocosweet

Well-Known Member
I felt guilty for ignoring this BW outside of Walgreens last week who tried to interrupt me when I was on the phone (it’s my signature move to avoid panhandlers, beggars, etc. bc in general it’s rude as hell to interrupt someone’s conversation) trying to beg for something. It was just one of those days where EVERYONE is demanding something from you, it was late and I just wanted to get home. After this thread my conscience is clear. :yep:
That’s the other thing. There’s too many of them!
 

intellectualuva

Well-Known Member
My friend is saying the story doesn’t sound right. Why didn’t he press the gas and drive off.

They assumed the man came up to say thank you as he was with the woman who was still lingering. Instead he stabbed her in the process of trying to steal her wallet which she still had nearby and I thought he sped off from there.

I hope that's the case and this man didnt set this sista up.
 

ScorpioBeauty09

Well-Known Member
A dadgum shame. I stopped giving to panhandlers once I noticed:
Increased sense of entitlement

Asking for more money

Refusing food (even though you claimed you wanted the money for food).

I really loathe begging.
This. I was out to dinner with SO a few months ago. It was a place where you ordered your food before sitting down. It was still summer so we ate outside even though it was nighttime. Before we walked in I noticed an older BW who was homeless around. When we came outside to sit she was still there and I noticed she kept watching me. :look: It was then I realized I was the only black person in the area. SO is Latino and there was an Asian family eating close to us. There was a white family but they just left. All of a sudden the homeless BW pops up in my face and asks me for some money. I was irritated and creeped out but ended up giving her some cash I had.

When I was a child, my mom would go off on panhandlers who would approach her while she was out with me or my sisters. She can't stand it.
 

ThirdEyeBeauty

Well-Known Member
You ladies are right. Many times they act entitled. I have given complete strangers rides and often times they acted ungrateful and one time was really bad so never again. I don't give to the ones at intersections anymore but I have had people approached me while walking out of businesses. I usually do not carry cash so it is often a no unless I am near my car (I used to carry change but not anymore). There was one time a man asked me for an exact amount for something and if I give him that amount he would have what he needed. So I gave him that amount and more. It was awhile ago so I cannot remember exactly but I heard him tell another not to far from me the exact same line. I am done helping panhandlers.

This story is tragic.
 

Everything Zen

Well-Known Member
You ladies are right. Many times they act entitled. I have given complete strangers rides and often times they acted ungrateful and one time was really bad so never again. I don't give to the ones at intersections anymore but I have had people approached me while walking out of businesses. I usually do not carry cash so it is often a no unless I am near my car (I used to carry change but not anymore). There was one time a man asked me for an exact amount for something and if I give him that amount he would have what he needed. So I gave him that amount and more. It was awhile ago so I cannot remember exactly but I heard him tell another not to far from me the exact same line. I am done helping panhandlers.

This story is tragic.

I am so glad you are no longer giving strangers rides.
 

intellectualuva

Well-Known Member
Whoever said the homeless are going to feel it were right.

https://bsun.md/2EjxbLq

As death of woman who helped panhandler gets national attention, Baltimore homeless see decline in generosity


Justin Morles walked along a traffic median in Baltimore’s Otterbein neighborhood Wednesday gripping a cardboard sign that bore a simple request — he needs help and a job.

However, the homeless man’s pleas to motorists on busy Conway Street were met this week increasingly with a click of car door locks.

Since the story of a woman who was fatally stabbed in Baltimore while helping a panhandler made national news this week, Morles and some of Baltimore’s other homeless citizens who panhandle in the Inner Harbor, Downtown West and Otterbein neighborhoods say they have seen the number of motorists willing to lower their windows dive.

“It’s embarrassing, it’s hurtful,” Morles said of hearing the car doors lock. “They’re acting like I’m not a person.”

Harford County resident Jacquelyn Smith, 54, was fatally stabbed about 12:30 a.m. Saturday after giving money to a woman in the rain at Valley and East Chase streets in Johnston Square.

Smith was seated in the front passenger seat of her car and had rolled down her window to give money to a woman carrying what appeared to be a baby and holding a cardboard sign that said “Please Help me feed my Baby.” A man then approached the car and tried to grab Smith’s wallet. After a struggle, police said, the man took out a knife and stabbed Smith.

The story made national news this week, prompting an outpouring of support for the Smith family and widespread shock and outrage about violence against a good Samaritan.

Some, however, also pointed to Smith’s death as warning to avoid interactions with panhandlers and homeless. Media mogul

Oprah Winfrey tweeted about the incident Tuesday, saying she had lowered her window for panhandlers many times but would “think twice” before doing it again.




For some of the homeless people in Baltimore who depend on panhandling, Smith’s death has dealt a devastating blow to the generosity they count on from motorists.

Morles tried positioning himself near an active construction site on West Conway Street Wednesday, where workers could be seen from the roadway. The 35-year-old hoped the workers’ presence would make drivers feel that it was less risky to roll down their windows for him while they waited for traffic lights to turn green.

“It messes with me,” Morles said of people’s fear of interacting with him.


Morles usually panhandles for about four hours a day, between his morning methadone treatments that stave off his heroin cravings and the 2:30 p.m. deadline to check into a shelter for the night. If Morles misses the check-in, he said, he is not allowed to sleep there for the night.


In those four hours panhandling, Morles asks for job leads and tries to make about $20 — just enough to pay for a pack of cigarettes and some fast food that will keep him full until the next day. On Wednesday, he panhandled for about six hours and made only $4.

“My main thing is I want a job,” he said. The attack “is going to make it harder. Who’s going to take a chance on me now?”

Stereotyping of the homeless is a pervasive problem that tends to gain traction when stories like Smith’s gain attention, said Kevin Lindamood, president and CEO of Health Care for the Homeless in Baltimore.

“What happened last weekend is a horrible crime,” Lindamood said, “but it really has nothing to do with property homelessness and public begging.”

He said the irony of refusing to interact with homeless people and those who panhandle is that it can worsen their isolation and inability to rejoin mainstream society.

“Whenever fear is involved like this, whenever there’s over-generalization from an isolated incident, it tends to dehumanize and other-ize and push us away from one another,” Lindamood said. “If we're really going to change the conversation, we've got to recognize our shared humanity. And that doesn't happen when we're scared of one another.”

Keith Pearson, 32, has been living on the streets of Baltimore since his wife died about three years ago. He often wanders between cars that are stopped at traffic lights near the Baltimore Convention Centerand Camden Yards, asking drivers for change.


Since Smith’s killing, Pearson has noticed people are treating him with more apprehension than usual.

One passerby spotted him walking down the street this week, turned around and sprinted in the opposite direction. Another man rolled down his window and appeared to jokingly ask if Pearson was going to stab him.

Yesterday was real bad,” he said of panhandling Tuesday. “We’re talking three to four hours, to make not even what it cost to go to Burger King.”

Lee Martin of the Our Daily Bread hot meal program in Baltimore has some advice for those looking to help the homeless in a safe and constructive way. He recommended carrying a list of charitable organizations that offer free services, meals and beds. The strategy gives people an easy way to direct those who struggle with what he called residence poverty to find the organizations that are immediately available to address their needs, he said.

Neighbors who spot people in crisis on the street can also call the United Way of Central Maryland at 211 or the Baltimore City non-emergency help service at 311, Lindamood said. Those services have trained outreach workers who can come offer assistance to those in need of shelter and medical aid, he said.

Pearson said the one aspect of panhandling that people do not seem to consider is that asking for change is better than stealing food out of desperation.

This is the humble way,” he said. “I’d rather humbly ask somebody instead of take.

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intellectualuva

Well-Known Member
That article rubs me the wrong way even though I feel for the homeless. The problem isn't that people are now afraid to help pandhandlers, but that our society is failing in ways that are causing the need for so many people to have to panhandle in the first place.

Where is the story on that??!!

Not that I disagree what the real story is....

They've done stories on the poverty gap and there have been documentaries about it as well.

People all over the country are writing about the rise of poverty, dangerous wealth gap etc....but even if there are policies to address it....there will still always be a segment of the population who will be poor/homeless (and likely an overwhelming number of them mentally ill) will rely on the generosity of strangers. If that generosity is minimized due to fear...people will feel it.
 

Reinventing21

Spreading my wings
^^^ Oh I agree with you definitely that it is important for people to understand how much their generosity is necessary. :yep: No doubt

It is just that I feel that in that article, the writer should have included a reference to those societal issues you listed as well. Otherwise, I feel it lets the government off the hook so to speak.

There are so many things wrong from lack of resources for the mentally ill and challeged to lack of employment, poor schools, charities that misappropriate funds and donations etc., and goverment spending on everything but the above. (Not just our government, but other wealthy goverments with third world poor populations.)

I don't know...Yes, I think an article highlighting the need for continued public generosity is pertinent, but at the same time people need to be reminded to continue to push for real systemic change.
 

Leeda.the.Paladin

Well-Known Member
I dont give money directly to people anymore, we contribute to organizations or donate our time.

The one exception to that is a girl who stopped me at the gas station once and said she’d been kicked out of her house by her relative. She was in her pjs, her hair bonnet still on, she was young and soft spoken, and I could see had everything she owned right there in her car. She was almost about to run out of gas. I happened to have $40 in my purse (very rare for me to have cash!) and gave it all to her. I felt like she and I were supposed to cross paths that day, I felt it from the moment she pulled up. I wonder what happened to her and in hindsight, wish I’d done more.

But no, as a general rule, I dont give money to pan handlers.
 

BillsBackerz67

Well-Known Member
99% of the time I’m always alone so I do don’t roll down my windows to give to anyone. Also if it’s past a certain time at night I don’t wait at red lights at all. I treat it as a stop sign and KIM. There is no reason anyone should have to wait a prolonged period of time for a light to turn green when its dark and desolate out.
 

intellectualuva

Well-Known Member
99% of the time I’m always alone so I do don’t roll down my windows to give to anyone. Also if it’s past a certain time at night I don’t wait at red lights at all. I treat it as a stop sign and KIM. There is no reason anyone should have to wait a prolonged period of time for a light to turn green when its dark and desolate out.

This is what my cousin does. She works nightshift and said she doesn't stop at stopsigns or stoplights depending on how late or early she goes in because she's afraid of carjackings and beggars approaching the car like they had before.
 

BillsBackerz67

Well-Known Member
This is what my cousin does. She works nightshift and said she doesn't stop at stopsigns or stoplights depending on how late or early she goes in because she's afraid of carjackings and beggars approaching the car like they had before.
Yep me working nights was the reason behind all of this. I would either work 11p to 7a or 7p to 3a...there was one light that was 4.5 minutes long for no reason. After a few shifts I said nope not doing this and ran it. I still obey stop signs because of random pedestrians and people driving without headlights though.
 

intellectualuva

Well-Known Member
Yep me working nights was the reason behind all of this. I would either work 11p to 7a or 7p to 3a...there was one light that was 4.5 minutes long for no reason. After a few shifts I said nope not doing this and ran it. I still obey stop signs because of random pedestrians and people driving without headlights though.

I should correct....she does a careful rolling stop at all of them. My cousin isnt blasting through intersections at 30mph for the same reasons you mentioned. Plus in Baltimore, they will walk right in front of your car even outside of intersections....they do not care...so you have to be mindful anyway.
 

intellectualuva

Well-Known Member
This reminds me of something that happened over 10 years ago going to work super early one morning. When I first looked to make the turn down the street lined like woods on both sides to exit the complex, there was no one on the street or even from what I could see between the few cars parked along the street. After I completed the turn and was about to really hit the accelerator, this guy stepped right out from out of nowhere. Had I been going any faster, I would not have been able to avoid him. I swerved around him, drove maybe 20 feet before coming to a stop. In my anger, I wanted to at least roll down a window to curse him out, but something stopped me just as I was about to hit the button and said look in the rearview mirror and said GO. This guy was fully bundled in a hat, hoodie, but I couldn't see his face because while he was facing me, his head was down. I could not even see his race because he was wearing gloves....it was spring...I hit that accelerator and was OUT.

I didn't even think to report suspicious activity, I was so darn scared and just wanted to get to work and off the road.

I have no doubts dude was up to something...I just hope no one else was a victim.
 

anilyn

Well-Known Member
This is one of the many reasons I don't give to panhandlers..a lot them have entitled attitudes. I once gave all the change I had in my car to one at the gas station and he proceeded to hand me back the pennies. Never again....

I politely told a panhandler "I'm sorry, I don't have any cash on me" and he told me the location of the nearest ATM. I was so shocked at the audacity of this dude, I didn't know whether to :lachen: or :angry2:
 

MissNina

Libra Girl
I give panhandlers money, but never at night unless there’s tons of ppl around (like downtown or something) and def not through my car at night. Even during the daytime, if I give money from my car, I never roll my window all the way down and I get the money out before I even call them over to me.

Never had a bad experience, but I feel so bad for that lady’s family. Her poor husband and daughter. I prob won’t stop helping ppl when I feel led, but I will definitely be even more cautious.

This reminds me of something that happened over 10 years ago going to work super early one morning. When I first looked to make the turn down the street lined like woods on both sides to exit the complex, there was no one on the street or even from what I could see between the few cars parked along the street. After I completed the turn and was about to really hit the accelerator, this guy stepped right out from out of nowhere. Had I been going any faster, I would not have been able to avoid him. I swerved around him, drove maybe 20 feet before coming to a stop. In my anger, I wanted to at least roll down a window to curse him out, but something stopped me just as I was about to hit the button and said look in the rearview mirror and said GO. This guy was fully bundled in a hat, hoodie, but I couldn't see his face because while he was facing me, his head was down. I could not even see his race because he was wearing gloves....it was spring...I hit that accelerator and was OUT.

I didn't even think to report suspicious activity, I was so darn scared and just wanted to get to work and off the road.

I have no doubts dude was up to something...I just hope no one else was a victim.

Okay, that’s hella creepy. Yikes.
 

SpiritJunkie

Well-Known Member
99% of the time I’m always alone so I do don’t roll down my windows to give to anyone. Also if it’s past a certain time at night I don’t wait at red lights at all. I treat it as a stop sign and KIM. There is no reason anyone should have to wait a prolonged period of time for a light to turn green when its dark and desolate out.
A few years ago I was driving this guy I was dating car home because he drank too much..after a night out.. I stopped at a red light and someone in a dark hoody was approaching the car... I just sped off. Can’t trust no one.
 
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