Children & The Church (Funny)!!!!!

miracle

New Member
I thought these were so adorable, and I wanted to share them so we could all have a good laugh. :lol:

God Bless Our Children!!!!!!


A little boy was attending his first wedding.
After the service, his cousin asked him, "How many women can a man marry?"
"Sixteen," the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly.
"How do you know that?"
"Easy," the little boy said.
"All you have to do is add it up, like the Bishop said:

4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer."

*********************************************************
After a church service on Sunday morning, a young boy suddenly
announced to his mother, "Mom, I've decided to become a minister When I
grow up."
"That's okay with us, but what made you decide that?"
"Well," said the little boy, "I have to go to church on Sunday anyway,
and I figure it will be more fun to stand up and yell, than to sit and
listen."

*********************************************************
A little girl became restless as the preacher's sermon dragged on
and on. Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered,

"Mommy, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?"

*********************************************************
After the christening of his baby brother in church, little Johnny
sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him
three times what was wrong.

Finally, the boy replied, "That priest said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I want to stay with you guys!"

*********************************************************
Terri asked her Sunday School class to draw pictures of their
favorite Bible stories. She was puzzled by Kyle's picture, which showed four people
on an airplane, so she asked him which story it was meant to represent. The
Flight to Egypt, was his reply.
Pointing at each figure, Ms. Terri said, "That must be Mary, Joseph,
and Baby Jesus. But who's the fourth person?"

"Oh, that's Pontius - the pilot.

*********************************************************
A college drama group presented a play in which one character
would stand on a trap door and announce, "I descend into hell!"
A stagehand below would then pull a rope, the trapdoor would spring,
and the actor would drop from view.

The play was well received. When the actor playing the part became
ill, another actor who was quite overweight took his place. When the new actor announced, "I descend into hell!" the stagehand pulled the rope, and the actor began his plunge, but became hopelessly stuck. No amount of tugging on the rope could make him descend.

One student in the balcony jumped up and yelled: "Hallelujah! Hell
is full!"

*********************************************************
This is the best one. A little girl was sitting on her
grandfather's lap as he read her a bedtime story.
From time to time, she would take her eyes off the book and reach up to
touch his wrinkled cheek. She was alternately stroking her own cheek, then
his again.
Finally she spoke up, "Grandpa, did God make you?"
"Yes, sweetheart," he answered, "God made me a long time ago."
"Oh," she paused, "Grandpa, did God make me too?"
"Yes, indeed, honey," he said, "God made you just a little while ago."
Feeling their respective faces again, she observed,
"God's getting better at it, isn't he?"

*********************************************************
 

dreamgurl

Member
miracle said:
*********************************************************
After the christening of his baby brother in church, little Johnny
sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him
three times what was wrong.

Finally, the boy replied, "That priest said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I want to stay with you guys!"

*********************************************************


This one was too funny...simply because of the honesty of children. God has a way of speaking through children to give the "know it all grown folks" some words of wisdom. Thanks for the laugh!
 

miracle

New Member
ladydee36330 said:
Thanks for my laugh before going to bed. I really like that Hallelujah! Hell is full.:lachen:

That one was my favorite, too!!!! I can actually see a little kid standing up and saying something like that. :lol: :lol: :lol:
 
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