Hair hate all up in the salon!!

[Isis]

That's a crying shame! Oh how I wish there were salons out there for women of COLOR who were trying to GROW and MAINTAIN LONG, HEALTHY hair.

Sounds like you have a multi-billion dollar idea!!

 

[Angelicus]

There isn't anything we can do about how other people feel towards us. It happens in families too as we all know.

It's only hair but hair does represent power and when some women feel powerless in their lives anyway, they feel intimidated and will hate on someone who appears to have what they want. We're talking about black women here but it happens with all races of women in this society - internal sexism.

ITA!!!!

 

[JOI]

That's a crying shame! Oh how I wish there were salons out there for women of COLOR who were trying to GROW and MAINTAIN LONG, HEALTHY hair.

Thats actually a good Ideal lol, You are definitely on to something. I would love to go to a salon like that lol, I have'nt been to a hair dresser in 10 years. I used to do hair, so I do my own hair and my daughters.

 

[ChasingBliss]

Sounds like you have a multi-billion dollar idea!!

Yeah, it would be nice...reeeaaallll nice.

 

[ChasingBliss]

Thats actually a good Ideal lol, You are definitely on to something. I would love to go to a salon like that lol, I have'nt been to a hair dresser in 10 years. I used to do hair, so I do my own hair and my daughters.

Yeah, I've heard that there are white salons out here like this.
Sadly, so many of us feel we cant grow long hair...which is probably why this idea has taken off in the past...

We at LHFC are the minority. Im reminded of that every time I try to share hair tips. Many think it's in the genes. EVEN though some of these same women watched me with shoulder length hair all my dang life until 3 years ago...go figure .

 

[ekomba]

it reminds me when i just arrived in ny in 98 and went to my friend hairdresser in bk to perm my hair that was already like 10inches plus i had lots of new growth i was excited to see how long my hair was. so she put the perm and rinsed it then i wanted to touch it she said stop touching it and sat me on the chair but turned it so i couldnt face the mirror and said i needed a trim i said no she said yes with force and proceeded to trim when she turned back the chair to the mirror i saw with horror all my hair on the floor i only had 3 inches of hair remaining and my whole back was shaven i crieddddd she was like oh dont worry it ll grow back that s the meanest thing after that i decided not to be bothered and kept my hair short and shorter for like 4 years i didnt have enough hair to do weaves or braids. i dont trust stylists anymore i only go for safe styles like braids and weaves where they cant hack my hair no trim for me i havent trimmed in a year and for the first time i m back to the length she cut off finally and i cant wait to be midback in dec and waistlength summer 07 i m be dedicated and do it on my own now that i m empowered to grow, nurture and control my own head!

 

[ekomba]

That's a crying shame! Oh how I wish there were salons out there for women of COLOR who were trying to GROW and MAINTAIN LONG, HEALTHY hair.

That s a great idea but i noticed most stylists hate on long hair as if their life bread is cuts. anyway you have your hair they are more into style doing cuts techniques and always want to do a style on you when you just want something simple gimme healthy long shiny hair, simple styles a bun, ponytail or straight boring style will do, or a wild look that s all i m looking for lol i m no longer into experimenting cuts if i want to do that i get a weave haha

 

[Iluvsmuhgrass]

Is it me or should there be a whole lotta *** whoopin goin on?

I keep my hair up alot... I don't use heat so it's not always bone straight. This girl in one of my classes was clownin on my hair (calling it nappy ish, raggedy, trying to clown because I go to class to learn and not be cute trying to pull a man) so I decided to wear it down and flat ironed the next. She could do nothing but sit there and stare. The next day I had it back up and in a bun. I haven't heard her say anything since. I don't understand why we have to be like that. Life is more than that. I am more than this shell and I'm definitely more than my hair. Somebody had a heapin' helpin' of haterade.

I went to an African salon (trying to recycle the dollars) and the stylist said "ohhhhhhhh your hair is longer than miiiiiiiiiiiine. Yall she jacked my junk up. She over processed my hair, left me sitting there while she did someone else's hair. When I told her it was burning she said just a minute longer. My hair came out while she was washing it. It hasn't been the same texture since. She denied doing anything wrong so I left her. The Creator has a way of dealing with people like her. I saw her years later and she said,"oh heyyyyyyyy how are youuuuuuuu" I mean mugged and said I'm good thanks. She just looked at my hair. It was so healthy and shiny she just stared and left. I wanted to knock the hot sauce outta her.

 

[Much2much41]

Is it me or should there be a whole lotta *** whoopin goin on?

I keep my hair up alot... I don't use heat so it's not always bone straight. This girl in one of my classes was clownin on my hair (calling it nappy ish, raggedy, trying to clown because I go to class to learn and not being cute trying to pull a man) so I decided to wear it down and flat ironed the next. She could do nothing but sit there and stare. The next day I had it back up and in a bun. I haven't heard her say anything since.

Somebody had a heapin' helpin' of haterade.

Was this her?:

 

[Iluvsmuhgrass]

Was this her?:

yup with a side of

 

[Lucia]

This is true and it happens in hispanic and Egytian salons too. Don't thin that if you go to the Dominicans or Egytians for a blow dry or style, they won't cut your hair too short. That happened to me, @ an Egytian place they we agreed on a small 1/8 inch trim, them the stylist a woman, chopped 3 inches off, that put me above BSl when I was @ lower bra strap length, I was pissed, but they were like you're ends are thin and damaged, I'm natural and don't abuse my hair. Since then I've never, ever gone to a salon again and I seriously doubt i ever will, the only ones who listen are the Supercuts, Great clips people but you still have to be very precise and a little agressive as to what you want exactly. I do everything myself now-forget them they just lost many future years of money I would have paid getting my hair styled.

 

[CandiceC]

A healthy hair salon concept could work with a salon and stylists that offer a lot of services. They wouldn't have to depend on overtrimming, crazy amounts of heat and styles that jack up folks' hair.

There could be stylists there that also do eyebrows, waxes, manicures, pedicures. Basically beauty specialists that each have a couple of skills. That could be a one stop shop for a lot of ladies on a healthy hair quest.

 

[tgaski2]

I just wanted to talk about an experience I had yesterday. I have 4A hair that has alot of shrinkage. Yesterday I went to the hair salon my aunt frequents to get a deep conditioner and trim. I had to comb my hair out first and so it was wet with conditioner when I got to the salon. Poeple were sitting up in their chairs and leaning out from up under their dryers trying staring at my hair. Most of the other women in their had long hair. The shampoo girl comes over and makes this loud rude comment about how my hair would be longer and prettier if I came in more often and let the "do something with it" I am thinking like what's that supposed to mean. So it took along time to comb it out. She's steady complaining about how long it's taking so I politely mentioned it to the stylist who to my suprise gave her a good set down and said she would do me herself. Two hours later I had a softly curled do that was about six inches long. The gossipy heifers . . .I mean ladies, in there all want to come over and try to touch my hair and exclaim over how long she made it. As if she made extra hair grow outta my scalp. Then they started asking the stylist what in the world she did and can she do it on theirs. I almost bust my gut when she calmly replied this girl just has that kinda hair. You can't pay to get this. Althought the attitudes of the other clients was no suprise as I have experienced the likes before, the stylists professionalism was a welcome suprise. Just wanted to share

 

[foxybrownsugar]

My goodness, my eyes were swelling with water reading your experiences and remembering my own horrible experiences with salons/stylists esp overtrimming/cutting (happened to me also, numerous times).I finally got tired of them not listening and doing what they wanted. I doubt that I will ever step foot in a salon again. I havent been to a stylist since around '97. I have been debating on getting a chi and I think I'm going to go ahead and get it soon.

 

[tenderheaded]

Even with stylists you trust you have to be on guard. A relative went to the same stylist for 10 years. Got home after an appointment and discovered a bald spot The ***** tried to say it was there BEFORE she started. After 10 years of regular visits? Come on!

Every time I think I might want to do to a stylist again they do something to scare me! I will NOT pay someone to bald me again

 

[CandiceC]

Even with stylists you trust you have to be on guard. A relative went to the same stylist for 10 years. Got home after an appointment and discovered a bald spot The ***** tried to say it was there BEFORE she started. After 10 years of regular visits? Come on!

Every time I think I might want to do to a stylist again they do something to scare me! I will NOT pay someone to bald me again

I feel ya. I was betrayed by a stylist after 4 years.
That's what led me to the Internet for my own solutions and eventually to this site!

 

[CurleeDST]

The black woman easily considered the most beautiful woman in the world by black, white, latino and every type of man in between is Halle Berry and she got to that status with short hair! She has since grown it out but she still looks best with short hair to me.


For men of other races, maybe it is more prevalent that their women have midback length hair, not sure.

Yes I meant the black male. You are so right about the crowning glory representing power and sensuality.

I have also seen many women with short hair who are drop dead georgeous, but in the black community if you have long hair you have to deal with the intimidation factor and the haters.

 

[balisi]

Hate is everywhere so why should the salon be any different? It's a sad shame anywhere you find it. I've experienced more hate from salon patrons than stylists, but as one who could always do my own hair, I didn't frequent salons on a regular basis.

One incident that comes to mind is the time I went to a new salon to have my BSL hair cut into a pixie. I'd always had long hair and just wanted a serious change, even though everyone who knew me thought I had lost my mind. I actually went to two other salons before I found someone who was willing to cut my hair. Well, the stylist I was assigned to made such a production out of cutting "all that hair off." After she loudly verified that I didn't have a husband who was going to come after her, she happily took her shears out. She went so far as to feign a climax over the cutting of my hair, basically putting on a show for everyone in the salon. She said that a long-haired client seeking a short cut is a stylist's dream.

As a stylist myself now, I cannot comprehend the hate and sabotaging anyone's crowing glory, no matter the length or condition. Although many appear to be, not all stylists are scissor happy hatin' heffas. I believe the type of salon you visit makes a difference, too. I just don't see that kind of carrying on in the chains and upscale salons.

 

[sareca]

The last time I went to the salon (last year) for a rollerset the stylist insisted I needed a touch-up (I was 6 weeks post) and a trim. I politely said "no thanks, I know a trim means 3 inches." She chuckled and said "yeah, that's our little secret, but it's for your own good." WTH? Although, she did a good job w/ the rollerset, after that comment I've never been able to bring myself to go back.

 

[BroadstreetBully]

I guess if I do ever trust a stylist to give me a trim I'm going to have to be more straight foward and lay down the rules. I want to see EVERY LITTLE PIECE that you trim. And no cutting layers! That's where they get you. "Girl your hair would look so cute with layers! *smirk*, you won't lose any length and it will frame your face perfectly, girl I'm gonna hook you up!" Next thing you know, a whole year of progress down the drain...

 

[BroadstreetBully]

Hate is everywhere so why should the salon be any different? It's a sad shame anywhere you find it. I've experienced more hate from salon patrons than stylists, but as one who could always do my own hair, I didn't frequent salons on a regular basis.

One incident that comes to mind is the time I went to a new salon to have my BSL hair cut into a pixie. I'd always had long hair and just wanted a serious change, even though everyone who knew me thought I had lost my mind. I actually went to two other salons before I found someone who was willing to cut my hair. Well, the stylist I was assigned to made such a production out of cutting "all that hair off." After she loudly verified that I didn't have a husband who was going to come after her, she happily took her shears out. She went so far as to feign a climax over the cutting of my hair, basically putting on a show for everyone in the salon. She said that a long-haired client seeking a short cut is a stylist's dream.

As a stylist myself now, I cannot comprehend the hate and sabotaging anyone's crowing glory, no matter the length or condition. Although many appear to be, not all stylists are scissor happy hatin' heffas. I believe the type of salon you visit makes a difference, too. I just don't see that kind of carrying on in the chains and upscale salons.

ITA, there are some awesome stylists out there. Also, I also agree that chain salons and upscale salons aren't as bad. I wonder why?

I know hate is everywhere, but somehow it just feels so different in a salon. Perhaps it is because someone has control over your hair as opposed to being out and about where folks can hate or admire all they want but can't do anything about it. Also it just feels so weird when people are all up in your head trying to find the tracks. People are more openly rude in a way.

 

[deejoy]

I can also relate to overtrimming/scissor happy stylists. I remember I had came back from vacation once and my hair was nearly armpit length. I had split ends but they weren't that bad. When I left out of the salon, I kept thinking I was going crazy because my hair was above shoulder length. From that point on, I just told her not to trim my ends anymore. It got to the point where my dad would call them and tell them not trim my ends either. I was 18 at the time so I unleashed my hair concerns onto him. Now years later, I am at a different salon, and they always ask me if I want a trim, how much they plan to trim, and they give me a mirror and ask me if it's ok. I don't even play that mess now. Shole don't.

 

[*ElleB]

I went to a salon at a dept store once and I was going to see a play later that night so I was pressed for time. The receptionist (a blk girl) set me up with this young black stylist. She kept saying how my ends needed to be trimmed or it wouldn't hold a curl. Well she trimmed and trimmed and... when she was done Then on top of that she wanted to charge me $25 extra.

By the time I got outside the store the curls had already dropped and she had the nerve to leave one long section of hair hanging there (like it was a reminder). The hair she cut did not even touch my shoulder and the piece of hair she left was hanging down to my breast I had to cut that off when I got home.

When I went back to complain the guy told me that she was no longer worked there and then he said I don't even know why they put you with her because everybody knows she don't like to see people with hair longer than hers.

OMG, that makes no sense! That is a SHAME!

 

[CandiceC]

I can also relate to overtrimming/scissor happy stylists. I remember I had came back from vacation once and my hair was nearly armpit length. I had split ends but they weren't that bad. When I left out of the salon, I kept thinking I was going crazy because my hair was above shoulder length. From that point on, I just told her not to trim my ends anymore. It got to the point where my dad would call them and tell them not trim my ends either. I was 18 at the time so I unleashed my hair concerns onto him. Now years later, I am at a different salon, and they always ask me if I want a trim, how much they plan to trim, and they give me a mirror and ask me if it's ok. I don't even play that mess now. Shole don't.

Girl, you got your dad on them! I shoulda thought of that back in the day!

 

[Trini"T"]

Oh my God in HEAVEN!! This thread making me feel something I should not be feeling right now! RedRiot, girl I am mad at you for starting this thread because you just relit the fire inside of me...

She went so far as to feign a climax over the cutting of my hair, basically putting on a show for everyone in the salon. She said that a long-haired client seeking a short cut is a stylist's dream.

Look at this nasty ish!! This witch nearly caught an orgasm cutting Balisi's hair.

I've never been to the ghetto salons you guys have been to, to experience this hateration. The two salons I've been to in my whole life, one of them just had middle-aged West-Indian women so they weren't bad at all. The other one, when I went it was always empty(I went on weekdays around 1pm after skool). Although I didn't have to sit through excess trimming and nasty stares I still received damage that's why I'm so mad.

Oh BTW, I no longer go to "salons". I do everything by myself.

 

[inthepink]

I guess if I do ever trust a stylist to give me a trim I'm going to have to be more straight foward and lay down the rules. I want to see EVERY LITTLE PIECE that you trim. And no cutting layers! That's where they get you. "Girl your hair would look so cute with layers! *smirk*, you won't lose any length and it will frame your face perfectly, girl I'm gonna hook you up!" Next thing you know, a whole year of progress down the drain...

This is exactly what happened to me except I wasn't even told I was getting layers. I just simply asked for a trim. A whole year went down the drain which is why my hair this year is the same length is was a year ago. No more salons for me. I'm slowly learning to trim my own hair.

 

[BroadstreetBully]

Oh my God in HEAVEN!! This thread making me feel something I should not be feeling right now! RedRiot, girl I am mad at you for starting this thread because you just relit the fire inside of me...

Look at this nasty ish!! This witch nearly caught an orgasm cutting Balisi's hair.

I've never been to the ghetto salons you guys have been to, to experience this hateration. The two salons I've been to in my whole life, one of them just had middle-aged West-Indian women so they weren't bad at all. The other one, when I went it was always empty(I went on weekdays around 1pm after skool). Although I didn't have to sit through excess trimming and nasty stares I still received damage that's why I'm so mad.

I am mad at myself! I am still angry about my bang incident! It's good you've never been to these salons. And it isn't just a problem that concerns hair. If you're exceptionally good looking there is at least one person who wants to jack your hair up. It's sad. These are supposed to be professionals. Leave the hood at the door.

 

[inthepink]

I can also relate to overtrimming/scissor happy stylists. I remember I had came back from vacation once and my hair was nearly armpit length. I had split ends but they weren't that bad. When I left out of the salon, I kept thinking I was going crazy because my hair was above shoulder length. From that point on, I just told her not to trim my ends anymore. It got to the point where my dad would call them and tell them not trim my ends either. I was 18 at the time so I unleashed my hair concerns onto him. Now years later, I am at a different salon, and they always ask me if I want a trim, how much they plan to trim, and they give me a mirror and ask me if it's ok. I don't even play that mess now. Shole don't.

When my hair was its longest, it's b/c my stylist knew how I felt about trims. I would always show him how much to trim. He'd take the first snip and show it to me to get approval before cutting anymore. Then he'd give me a mirror to watch as he trimmed the back. My hair was the healthiest and longest ever.

 

[SerenityBreeze]

RedRiot,

Your bang incident makes me so angry!! I mean, really, what in the world makes theses stylists feel that they can just do as "they" please without consulting clients. AAARRGGHH!!

 

[BroadstreetBully]

RedRiot,

Your bang incident makes me so angry!! I mean, really, what in the world makes theses stylists feel that they can just do as "they" please without consulting clients. AAARRGGHH!!

And she had the nerve to throw the hair over her shoulder! She's never done that before!