How many times do I have to tell her?

[LondonDiva]

I think (no lie) I've told my friend NOT to do it at least 4 times already. She's relaxed and wants to dye her hair blonde

Every time we're in the BSS and she passes the colour she comments on trying to find the perfect blonde colour. I've told her either relax or colour you CANNOT do both. I've told her it's taken me 2 years to reverse the damage that bastid Shamboosie recommended the Clairol Textures & Tones was the safest and only colour relaxed heads could use. NEVER AGAIN she even saw the damage in October 2004 and I've told her to take heed from my mishap.

I have a feeling though that the last time I told her (a few days ago) she's going to do it at some point, moreso because I've said not to. But then I'm the one that's going to get phone calls about her hair dropping off and I've told her it'll probably turn orange/ginger and not blonde.

She keeps going on that her hair was healthy when she was blonde (I seriously doubt that) but back then she was natural and not processed with a relaxer.

Should I keep going on when she mentions it or let her feel it for herself with it all bruk off? I'm actually tempted with the latter and the old Jamaican saying "Those who don't hear must feel."

I mean how many times do I need to sound like a broken record.

 

[KiniKakes]

You are a good friend! A true, genuine friend who cares about her friends best interests, above all else. That's a beautiful thing.

But at this point, I'd just let it go. You've said all that you can..... to continue to protest and explain the reasons why to her, is to beat a dead horse, at this point.

Just let her make her own mistakes..... and pray for the patience to be that shoulder she needs to cry on when her hair starts to break off. If you can resist, do not say "I told you so." She will realize, in retrospect, that she should have heeded your warnings. No need to rub it in her face afterward...... the damage to her hair will be admonishment enough. Poor, clueless girl.

 

[cmw45]

I would say try telling her one more time...then I say we follow the advice of the Jamacians.

 

[IrisDaVirus]

I say don't tell her anything anymore. You've obviously told her enough yet she's too headstrong to listen and appreciate your advice. So there's no other way for her learn but the hard way. If that's how she's destined to learn then so be it.

 

[dimpalz]

She's relaxed and she wants to dye her WHOLE head blonde? Don't she know it wont work anyway unless a professional does it. It's gonna be patchy, that's IF it doesn't fall out. If she doesn't wanna listen tell her on the phone, record it and when her hair is ear length, stragly, broken off and a general mess and she's coming with "why didn't u tell me" you just play it back for her.

 

[ohsosuzy]

People are always going to do what they want despite hearing about the possible repercussions. She's probably going to do it, just be patient with her and have an extra bottle of aphogee or emergency on hand since she's probably going to need it.

 

[GoingNatural]

i was relaxed with BSS hair...I dyed my hair blond and it started falling out in the curling iron, in the comb, in my hands...so if color is more important than length or quality of her hair..then she should go for it!!! otherwise she should:

a)wait until she's natural and trade one chemical for another
b)give up the idea

but you know how it is, you don't believe it until it happens to you!

 

[MzOptimistic]

I think (no lie) I've told my friend NOT to do it at least 4 times already. She's relaxed and wants to dye her hair blonde

Every time we're in the BSS and she passes the colour she comments on trying to find the perfect blonde colour. I've told her either relax or colour you CANNOT do both. I've told her it's taken me 2 years to reverse the damage that bastid Shamboosie recommended the Clairol Textures & Tones was the safest and only colour relaxed heads could use. NEVER AGAIN she even saw the damage in October 2004 and I've told her to take heed from my mishap.

I have a feeling though that the last time I told her (a few days ago) she's going to do it at some point, moreso because I've said not to. But then I'm the one that's going to get phone calls about her hair dropping off and I've told her it'll probably turn orange/ginger and not blonde.

She keeps going on that her hair was healthy when she was blonde (I seriously doubt that) but back then she was natural and not processed with a relaxer.

Should I keep going on when she mentions it or let her feel it for herself with it all bruk off? I'm actually tempted with the latter and the old Jamaican saying "Those who don't hear must feel."

I mean how many times do I need to sound like a broken record.

You can only tell her so many times but if she is truly a friend...It won't hurt to keep telling her as a reminder...ever so often...she haven't done it yet...so she's hearing you...just keep whispering in her ear...NO

*OT...I have been all up in your album and I can't wait to see your relaxed hair...can I get a peek?

 

[firecracker]

Tell that ***** when they pull all that color out she will have a whole nother perm. Permanent hair on the floor! Unless she goes jheri juice happy that hair is gon shed like a cat.

 

[scorpian]

Tell that ***** when they pull all that color out she will have a whole nother perm. Permanent hair on the floor! Unless she goes jheri juice happy that hair is gon shed like a cat.

I can cosign on this. Been there..done that.. the results are not cute
She should choose the color or the perm not both

 

[LondonDiva]

You can only tell her so many times but if she is truly a friend...It won't hurt to keep telling her as a reminder...ever so often...she haven't done it yet...so she's hearing you...just keep whispering in her ear...NO

*OT...I have been all up in your album and I can't wait to see your relaxed hair...can I get a peek?

Don't you dare try and tempt me young lady Not until April 07.

 

[MzOptimistic]

Don't you dare try and tempt me young lady Not until April 07.

I'm sawwwwy...I know betta...it's just that your hair is already long and I see allllllllll that ng...I'm just dying to see but...ummm...errrrrr...yah....April

 

[seeminglysweet]

how long is her hair currently? Why cant she get a blonde weave? I would not bother telling her anymore. I had a friend ask me what color a drugstore boxed blonde color would turn her hair when applied..I said ORANGE. I told her to test the color on hair from her hairbrush. I guess she thought I didn't know what I was talking about. 2 days later her hair had HUGE bright orange chunks in it and it began to fall out.

They have to learn on their own. Now she wears wigs and is trying to get her hair to grow and be healthy.

 

[sunshinebeautiful]

You know sometimes people ain't gonna listen. Let her go on ahead and do it. My BFF was fascinated with blonde color and finally went ahead and dyed her relaxed hair blonde. And she just KNEW how to take care of it b/c she's a hairstylist. Within four months or so, she had to cut her hair into a short style from the damage. I bet ya she won't be dying her hair blonde no mo.

 

[Lusa]

Let her be. She'll learn her lesson when the bleaching fries all the hair she has. That's the only way she'll learn.

 

[RainbowCurls]

I like dimpalz's idea of taping yourself telling her it wont work

 

[nelli711]

Ya know, people are going to do what they want to do no matter what. It sounds like she has her heart set on coloring it. She knows what happened to your hair when you colored it but she probably doesn't think that what happened to you is gonna happen to her. If she wants to do it, let her. We all have to learn from our own mistakes.

 

[Mortons]

Is there any safe way to dye you hair. I mean I'm slightly texlaxed and I wanted to go jet black. Its in no way possible?