How To Not Slap Your Co-Workers While Transitioning

[Ms Red]

By now you've read the title of the thread and deduced that I am transitioning to natural. Today marks my 6th month of transitioning.

Well, I came to work... as usual... and I was wearing a phony pony. Now, I'm doing the baggie method underneath my ponytail and although my waves are pretty obvious, I feel good that I'm doing something positive for my hair.

My white co-worker (female) comes up to me at 10:00 a.m. and says (LOUDLY) "Oh, I wish you would take that fake, straight hair off and just have curly hair already!!" Now, I am totally heated because she just basically yelled this out for all to hear in her ignorant manner. I told her "Who the hell invited you into a conversation about my hair? You think just because your child is half-black we can just have a conversation about your inferiority complex and your need to justify your "blackness.".... NEXT.

I am so done... everytime you come in this place with a new hairdo, people want to get in your face "IS IT REAL??? OHHH..." Listen biatches, Britney spears, Jessica Simpson, The whole cast of Laguna Beach AND your mother wear extentions. Get over yourself !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for letting me vent!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[foxybrownsugar]

((((((cupcake))))))) weather your hair looks good or bad there will always be a hater. @ listen biatches

 

[getmoore]

I guess you told her! It's none of her business what you wear on your head anyway! I'd have loved to have seen the look on her face after you said that!

 

[hopeful]

I guess you told her! It's none of her business what you wear on your head anyway! I'd have loved to have seen the look on her face after you said that!

Co-signing with getmoore...people can be so rude!

 

[Blossssom]

You said that to her? Oh boy...

She was rude, though...

I remember when I took my braids down (this was 6 years ago about), I was NATURAL and did I get more stares... most people looked SHOCKED!

But once my hair settled down (it was all over the place) and people became used to seeing it, they loved it.

So just be patient with the ignorant. And good luck transitioning. You're quite courageous, chick

 

[sareca]

I can't stand when white women think because they've married a black man they're "down wit it." That's just NOT cool.

 

[mkstar826]

It's none of her business what you wear on your head anyway!

exactly. i hope she got that point today

 

[MeccaMedinah]

Wow, that is one rude chick.
I guess you set her straight, for the time being. People like her are usually plain ol' rude all of the time; they just don't get it.

 

[CurliDiva]

GOOD FOR YOU

This is a sad example of how some a white woman can love black DI*K, but really hates (and disrespects) black women!

I hope she is not raising a little black girl!

 

[Sweet_as_jalebi]

Im really glad you pulled her card. How rude was she!...geez.
Let me ask ya'll question. When did it become politically correct to ask a black woman if her hair is real. I get this aaaalll the time at my job. People are constantly asking me & I have been trying to come up with a sassy *ss remark. I just can't think of one. I'm no good at comebacks.

 

[MzTami]

I'm transitioning too, and my co-workers look but they don't stare or dare ask questions But then again, one day they may ask me a dumb question and uma hafta pimp slap um for asking!

 

[MizAvalon]

Cupcake, you can NOT leave us hanging like that!!! Please tell us what her reaction was after you said that to her?


Oh, and the answer to how to not slap your coworkers while transistioning is you DON'T!! Just slap them.

 

[MizAvalon]

Im really glad you pulled her card. How rude was she!...geez.
Let me ask ya'll question. When did it become politically correct to ask a black woman if her hair is real. I get this aaaalll the time at my job. People are constantly asking me & I have been trying to come up with a sassy *ss remark. I just can't think of one. I'm no good at comebacks.

I would like to know this as well. WTH is wrong with people? That has got to be one of the most rude and inappropriate questions ever. I flat-out don't answer most of the time.

 

[caligirl]

I mostly get stares, but I know folks are all huddled up trying to figure out if my hair is real or not. People are NOT used to seeing black women with their hair in its thick curly/kinky natural state. They figure it has to be fake. White folks don't know any better. But black folks have no excuse.

 

[phynestone]

I can't stand when white women think because they've married a black man they're "down wit it." That's just cool.

I've run into so many women who do this. Or kids as well.

 

[sareca]

I've run into so many women who do this. Or kids as well.

I had a white female coworker say, "I think I can say n*gg*r, if I want to" (and yes, she said the real word). I said, 'Think what you like but I wouldn't recommend you EVER say that around me again.' Then I said, 'It's like this, I can say I'm getting so fat, but if you say that it's a different story entirely. Same thing with the N word. It's just not for you to say!'

 

[Lovelylocs]

I dont like the weave assumptions either.

 

[SouthernGirl]

Thanks for a great Saturday morning chuckle! She is just WRONG, but good for you. With that response, I'm sure she'll think twice before making comments like that again.

 

[shoelover1972]

Im really glad you pulled her card. How rude was she!...geez.
Let me ask ya'll question. When did it become politically correct to ask a black woman if her hair is real. I get this aaaalll the time at my job. People are constantly asking me & I have been trying to come up with a sassy *ss remark. I just can't think of one. I'm no good at comebacks.

Good for you cupcake. I'm in suspense - what was her response.

I also get this from people. The next time a white woman asks me this again then I'm hoping she is blond & i'll ask her if her hair is real or from a bottle . Our hair is such a source of fascination especially when you come into work with a different style / hair up / hair down etc its always sooo many questions & comments.

 

[london honey]

i'm glad you put the B!T*H in her place. In times like this, work place violence should be allowed.

 

[MissYocairis]

exactly. i hope she got that point today

mkstar826!!!! Your hair is GORGEOUS!

 

[meia]

I think a good reason for why a lot of white women make comments like that is because believe it or not I think they love our hair and are jealous..think about it.. we can damn near do anything we want- pull off any style we want and, for a lot of them, their hair is either lank and limp in a straight style, or curly...our hair texture is beautiful..

its all across the board and we know how to style it..they are stuck with just what they have and besides straightening it or adding highlights, they dont do anything else for the most part...

i think its just jealousy..lol as star and bucwild used to say, somebody been sippin on that haterade..hahahaha

whats so funny about my hair is that im transitioning too, and the roots are very thick and nappy and dont look good for when I leave my hair wavy..but ive accepted it and embraced it..lots of girls, instead, look me up and down like theres something wrong with me..i hate that sh*t..

IF YOU DONT HAVE NOTHIN GOOD TO SAY, DONT SAY NOTHIN AT ALL!!

 

[ftballwidow]

Im really glad you pulled her card. How rude was she!...geez.
Let me ask ya'll question. When did it become politically correct to ask a black woman if her hair is real. I get this aaaalll the time at my job. People are constantly asking me & I have been trying to come up with a sassy *ss remark. I just can't think of one. I'm no good at comebacks.

I have a few things I say:

That is like asking someone if they have false teeth or fake boobs. No you didn't

never ask a person that

Why?


That is rude, please don't embarrass yourself like that and ask anyone else that.

I always have a big smile on my face and I usually follow up by saying: to make up for that you better say you like it, that is the only way I'm going to forgive you (don't even let them answer that, move on, change subject, leave room, or whatever is appropriate)

I usually do this if they ask me in front of a bunch of people. I have no problem if people know, I just don't like being asked about it in front of a bunch of people. I have never had anyone be rude about it. My experiences have been nosiness and really sincerely wondering. They have to know that it is rude and inappropriate. That is why I do one of the above. I had an older white lady friend ask me if my hair was naturally curly like that. She was sincere. I told her and she was so suprised. I couldn't bring myself to say any of the above, it was just the two of us and she had no clue. I guess, I could have just said yes (curly/kinky same thing to some people). People also compliment me on color (a weave w/ color) and I say thank you. I don't know what I would say if they asked what color. I'm not going to lie about having fake hair in my head, at the same time, I don't need to discuss it w/ everybody.

I have no problem with people knowing, I just don't like what they do with the information. Once you let them do that then they think they can just tell anyone (like the fed ex guy that delivers mail, your boss at the staff mtg, or whoever). They think it is open season for some reason. Everytime you turn around Becky is telling Melanie that you buy your hai and asking questions.

I do it this way, first of all, I get a kick out of handling difficult people in funny ways and I don't want to be self conscious about it and get all bent out of shape over it. Even though it does bug me, I don't want them to know that. I want them to learn the bigger lesson. YOU ARE ASKING A PERSONAL QUESTION OR MAKING A PERSONAL COMMENT IN FRONT OF PEOPLE- DON'T!! Oh, I guess you could say that too! Wow, what happened to my quick reply?

 

[caligirl]

whats so funny about my hair is that im transitioning too, and the roots are very thick and nappy and dont look good for when I leave my hair wavy..but ive accepted it and embraced it..lots of girls, instead, look me up and down like theres something wrong with me

Haters. They wish they could wear their hair natural and be cute and confident like you.