Yes to all of this!!!! Especially the bolded. At my workplace paternity leave just jumped from 6 weeks to 5 months!!!! I have at least 3 male colleagues who are taking it now (and imagine the relief it’ll provide to their families). These are attorneys who are as busy as the OP. We have to acknowledge the problems and collectively (men and women) find solutions that foster healthy families rather than find out more original ways to farm out all childcare/rearing to others. I’ve stopped taking our mothers’ lunches seriously because it’s just a lot of “You go girl! Your kid will be fine!” vs. constructive solutions.