Overcoming Bitterness

cocoberry10

New Member
I posted this in off-topic, but I always like a spiritual answer from my Christian ladies (I know there’s not as much traffic here). Hopefully you can help!

I have a friend who has become very bitter and cynical about life in general. She has been through some difficult things in the last year especially (and her life has gotten “out of her hands,” over the last few years). She is bitter mainly b/c she really was a good person, but life has thrown her a few bad seeds, and now she is bittery, cynical and unforgiving. I explained to her that living like this is death, and that she must learn to trust others again, etc. Also, I told her that her bitter spirit emits, and positive people and things cannot come into her life this way! However, I am coming to you all (who give such good advice). How does a person overcome bitterness and begin to see that although we go through difficult times, there’s light at the end of the tunnel (that’s my optimist belief)! Thanks!:)
 

cocoberry10

New Member
Whew... ok.... I sorta feel inadequate to answer because I've just been set free from bitterness and so this new way of feeling is still new....

I know this thread isn't in the Christian forum or else I'd "go there" in terms of stating things as they are spiritually.... but what I can say from the natural perspective is that I had to look in the mirror and take responsibility for the choices and decisions that I made in my life. While I could not and cannot control everything and everybody, I had to own up to what I could control and I had to face it, own it, and stop being so hard on myself and forgive myself. I had been my own worst critic (and I still am, to an extent but the Lord is working on me! :pray:Hallelujah!)

My friends who could handle being around me would pray for me and give me space to cry and vent and then it got to the point where they had to do some "tough love" either by telling me what the real deal was about myself or letting me go off on my own. I do know that even when I isolated myself, they were praying for me.

Ultimately, I had to release some things and get up and get moving, reminding myself how good the Lord has been to me...that there's someone worse off than me so I had better maximize the grace that I have been so undeservedly given.

ETA: Adequate's post says it so much more eloquently....:yep:

Thanks for your post. I totally agree with this. I personally believe bitterness is a cycle that causes a downward spiral in someone’s life. The more bitter you become, the more difficult it is to be around you, the less people want to be around you, the fewer “opportunities” come into your life. And all this will do is make a person more bitter, IMO!
 

cocoberry10

New Member
Bumping. I posted this in off-topic too, b/c no one ever replies in this one! Come on prayer warriors, get in here:lol:
 

InVue

Simple Life Lover
Actually, I agree with the above response and the others I've read in the OT thread.

I think recognizing and admitting our bitterness is the first step toward recovery. After we confess then we seek a solution that will lead us to peace of mind or healing. If one is a practicing Christian one may seek God for deliverance.

During my ordeal as a bitter woman, I had a lot of pity-parties. One day, while having a pity-party I got to thinking about my hurt and started to cry uncontrollably. I began to pray and ask God to cleanse me --to remove the resentment and bitterness from my heart. This must have gone on for fifteen or twenty minutes.

Afterwards I actually felt better like the heaviness had been lifted off me. However, the thought “forgive, forgive” kept coming into my head. Admittedly, there was a person in my life who I resented for many years (since my youth). I eventually went to this person and asked for their forgiveness for holding a lengthy grudge.

Over time I earnestly got better peace and contentment came into my life. It is as though I’ve had a new outlook on life. These days I don’t sweat the small stuff. That’s not to say that the enemy (satan) doesn’t tempt me from time to time. I can’t stop a bird from flying over my head but I can stop it from making a nest. That’s the way I feel about negative thoughts and bitterness.

The mind is an incredibly perceptive tool it looks both within and without for negativity and it finds it. And if one is not careful negativity will become a self-fulfilling prophesy in one’s life. "You get what you think about; your thoughts determine your destiny.”

Tell your friend to stop shortchanging herself let that bitter spirit go and start living life in its fullness…Life is too short and uncertain to live it bitterly.

I'll be praying for her with you...
 
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Jenaee

Well-Known Member
Thank you for this thread! I'm going through this now. I'm get so upset and bitter over the way I've handled things and situations in my life. I know He loves me and He cares but it's hard to see the forest for the trees.

Please keep me in prayer!
 

kim

Well-Known Member
Thanks for posting this. I have someone in my life who has these same issues and I have been trying to figure out how to help her. She has gotten difficult to be around, but I really want to help her.
 

dreamer26

New Member
In my dealings with bitter people or with anyone with an issue. (myself included) You can not help someone until they recognize they need help and want it.

I wasn't bitter but I was a jealous person and didn't really realize it until one I really heard the things that would come out my mouth.

I took a shower one day and as I got out of the shower I stood in front of the mirror "BUTT NAKED" and I cried out to God and told him all about my issues and that I wanted to change and I needed his help. I stood "BUTT NAKED" just to symbolize that I'm no longer hideing behind anything but Lord I'm coming to you just as I am. I fasted and prayed.

And I know God began a work on me but for the life of me I can not tell you when I stopped being jealous. I know he put so many people in my path that had it going on and I had to learn to give compliments and not look for the extras. Now, I don't even have that issue with people and I thank God everyday because anything that's not like God that's in your life will destroy you little by little.

For those that struggling take owner ship of it and tell the devil he is a liar and I will not continue to be______________ fill in the blank. Seek God's face and then "DO BETTER", don't just pray with the same ole mind set and same ole attitude, determine in yourself and make the effort that I will do better and then watch God meet you the rest of the way.
 
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