Recovering from a Setback Support Thread

Discussion in 'Hair Care Tips & Product Review Discussion' started by Nayeli, Aug 21, 2009.

  1. Nayeli

    Nayeli Well-Known Member

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    Thought this would be a good idea for all the LHCFers trying to bounce back from a not so pleasant hair experience.

    As for me, I over-processed in July and am only now seeing how badly it thinned my hair. So, the idea is to share the details of your experience and give and receive support to/from the other ladies on the road to recovery.

    Setback: Over-processing

    Effects: Thinner & dull hair, breakage

    Plan of action: BT, goal of not relaxing till December, strict vits regimen, zero heat, taking off two inches

    Estimated date of full recovery: December 18th (4 months recovery time)
    :band2: :band: :cheers:

    (My hair WILL be on point by this date because I have a huge wedding to go to the next day and the plan is to get a relaxer and wear my hair out).:grin:
     
  2. sunnieb

    sunnieb Well-Known Member

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    OK, you must have known that I needed this!

    The good news: I MADE APL last month!!!!! YES! :grin:

    The bad news: I cowashed tonight and discovered I've lost about half an inch (maybe more in some places)!!!!! :wallbash: :wallbash: :wallbash: :wallbash:

    I know what happened. My hair loves cowashing. Last week I got home late one night with no time to cowash. I figured I could just put my HE on my ends, go to sleep, rinse out in the morning. I usually leave a little conditioner in my hair when I cowash anyway, so I figured this would be okay to do. Well, I woke up the next morning and before I could rinse the conditioner out, I noticed that my hair was breaking at the ends!! I didn't think it was that bad and I immediately rinsed it all out and bunned up for work. I did a protein DC that night and I thought it took care of the problem.

    Unfortunately, the damage was done. I checked my length tonight and I'm no longer APL. :sad: Why oh why did I try something new when my basic reggie was working just fine. Ugh!

    At least I know what to do to get my length back, but it's still very upsetting to finally get to APL and lose it so quickly........

    Estimated time of recovery: I think I will hit APL again by the end of October. I'm just going to go back to my basic reggie (shampoo/dc 2x a week, cowash 3x a week, bunning daily)
     
    Last edited: Aug 21, 2009
  3. Khaiya

    Khaiya Well-Known Member

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    I think this thread is a good idea, i know it will be helpful to me.

    Setback: Relaxer burns

    Effects: Major shedding, a little thinning (i'm praying it wont get worse)

    Plan of action: Protective styles, no heat, no relaxer until December *I'm dreaming on this one but we'll see how far i can get* Daily application of garlic oil, DC 1-2x weekly, wash weekly, cowash in between when i think i need it.

    Estimated date of full recovery: December 18th (6 months recovery time)

    Nayeli our recovery date is the same, maybe i can stick it out since i have company. My last relaxer was July 3rd so December 18 will be exactly 6 months for me, hopefully i can stick it out.
     
  4. Nayeli

    Nayeli Well-Known Member

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    Thanks for coming aboard guys. Congrats on APL sunnieb. I switched up too. I went to a new stylist because I didn't have the money to go to my regular. Worse yet, it was partly my fault because I wanted a bone straight look. :wallbash:

    Khaiya, I'm sure we can do it! The only thing that might stop me from such a long stretch is that I'm preparing for interviews and I may not want to keep flat ironing when I have them coming up. But I really really want to push till December. Everytime I even think about a relaxer I can almost feel my follicles wincing.
     
  5. MahoganyJazz

    MahoganyJazz Well-Known Member

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    I too am having a set back. I washed last night and noticed that there is a T shaped section at the top of my head that is badly broken off. I mean, it's about a quarter inch long in that entire section. I don't know WTH happened. I haven't had any significant breakage in ages. It seems the hair has vanished. I'm beyond hurt and I have no clue what to do about it.
     
  6. BroadstreetBully

    BroadstreetBully New Member

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    Great thread! :yep:

    Setback: Using a harsh color

    Effects: Severe breakage of a patch of hair up front

    Plan of action: I might try that MN stuff and start babying that area.

    Estimated date of full recovery: Hopefully by December it will get long enough to more comfortably fit into my puff. :sad:
     
  7. janaq2003

    janaq2003 Well-Known Member

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    I think it was a neat idea OP starting this thread. We've all been there.
     
  8. Khaiya

    Khaiya Well-Known Member

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    Another year end goal BroadstreetBully!:grin:

    Nayeli i know what you mean, when i think about relaxing right now i have nightmares of hundreds of hairs with white bulbs all around me.:nono: Even if i dont make it to December, i'm definitely not relaxing until the shedding stops, we'll see how long that takes.
     
  9. Desarae

    Desarae Well-Known Member

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    Setback: Bleach Highlights + Demi Color+BKT Heat Step Damage+ Black hair dye= I don't know who's hair this is on my head anymore.:perplexed

    Effects: Damaged, frazzled looking breaking ends and shedding. Detangling nightmare. Short pieces sticking up from crown. Hair velcros together. When wet.

    Plan of action: Stretching relaxer for the first time. I already trimmed an inch off, but they frizzed right back up which leads me to believe the damage is all the way up the shaft:sad: I am co-washing and DCing every other day and bunning and moisturizing religiously to hopefully preserve my hair (And hopefully strip this "treatment" off). I have toyed with the idea of chopping it all off but decided to wait until I see if I can bring some life back to it. I may get braids for no manipulation.

    Estimated date of full recovery: I'm not sure, it all depends how much of the hair I can save and how much will eventually need to be cut. I will say 6 months at least.
     
  10. Nayeli

    Nayeli Well-Known Member

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    Mahogany, I'm wondering what could have gone wrong. What I do know is that that's where a lot of my breakage seems to be centered as well.

    DesiRae, I was thinking about cutting too, but it took my mother to stop me.

    Broadstreet, I used MN in the past. I mixed it with BT while I was using it. This combo made my hair shoot up.
     
    Last edited: Aug 22, 2009
  11. beans4reezy

    beans4reezy Well-Known Member

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    Nayeli, this a great thread. Even if you haven't had a set back, you see some of the pitfalls you can avoid.
     
  12. ceebee3

    ceebee3 New Member

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    Aww, I know how you guys feel. I'm in recovery mode right now. I was so on point with my hair since I started caring for it at the end of January.

    I made it from shoulder length to APL in 6 months by washing, deep conditioning and rollesetting once a week. I took a picture in the beginning of August and I was shocked that I had lost nearly 2 inches of hair. It took me back 4 months.

    Setback: Abusing protein, co-washing, saran wrap treatment (dried my hair out)

    Effects:
    drier dull hair and breakage when I comb, detangle and rollerset

    Plan of action:
    I deep conditioned like crazy for 2 weeks then I relaxed my hair 6 weeks ahead of schedule (I usually go every 12-13 weeks) to breakdown the protein in my hair. This immediately stopped the broken hairs and I didn't lose a lot of hair during the process. I will continue with the regimen that was working for me before I went crazy with all the extra stuff.

    Estimated date of full recovery: December 12th 4 months to get back where I was in July.

    I probably wont relax again until February which will make one year of healthy hair care for me.

    We can do this ladies!!!
     
  13. Nayeli

    Nayeli Well-Known Member

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    Thanks you guys! I was looking at my hair in the mirror earlier today and was just so disgusted with myself - mostly because I KNOW what's right and yet still kept that relaxer in longer than I should have.

    I don't normally start threads but thought that a support thread would be just what I and others need.
     
  14. MsBoinglicious

    MsBoinglicious New Member

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    Setback: Single Strand Knots

    Effects: Had to cut hair. Went from top of BSL to just a tad bit under APL

    Plan of action: Cleanse, Co-Wash, Deep Condition in braids with clips on the ends (so hair can't curl/coil upon itself). Blow Dry on cool/Roller set and bun on dry hair. Dust ends every Month. Moisturize/seal ends every other day.

    Estimated date of full recovery: I am giving it until December 09. If the knots do not diminish then I am gong back to a relaxer.
     
  15. prospurr4

    prospurr4 Well-Known Member

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    I just dropped in to say, "Great thread, Nayeli!

    I wish each of ya'll expedient success as you recover from your setback.
     
  16. jerseygirl1977

    jerseygirl1977 Well-Known Member

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    Setback: heat damage on natural hair :wallbash:

    Effects: straight strands that will not revert back, split ends

    Plan of action: cut about 2 inches of split ends, have to start transitioning to grow out straight pieces; deep condish weekly and keep in protective styles as much as possible.

    Estimated date of full recovery: probably another year before i can cut out all of the straight pieces

    I'm so upset. I've been natural for over 3 years and have flat-ironed my hair before to have my ends cut. Well in preparation for my wedding I had my hair flat-ironed twice within the month and that was all she wrote. My hair looked nice for the wedding but now I'm dealing with heat damage. No more straightening for me.
     
  17. Nicole1976

    Nicole1976 Member

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    Hey Everone,

    I too had a major setback, but not recent it was a long time
    ago when I first came to the board

    I went from APL hair to Ear length...really quick, I did a lot of crying :nono:

    Problem
    Dye Damage

    Resolution
    Steady Trims
    Conditioning/Protein balance
    Protective Styling
    No Heat
    No Dye

    Good luck Ladies!!!
     
  18. 4mia

    4mia Well-Known Member

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    hi everyone, i just posted a sos thread. I really need this. op thanks for coming up with the idea. well here is my story.
    i have been a member for awhile here. Recently i lost my 15mth old son and shortly after found out i was expecting again. I have completly neglected my hair and appearance. I really need help with a simple regi since i also work full time. Also I just really need some encouragement to get me back in the game. Im ashamed of my hair right now and i worked really hard in the past to get it healthy and bsl.
    please ladies help!! noone but you all understands what a womans appearance mean to them.



    Setback: sleeping without a bonnet, washing only 1x a week. ponytails daily, not moisturizing properly. no rely regi.

    Effects: Thinner & dull hair, breakage, dont seem to be growing and shedding

    Plan of action: 1st come up with a simple regi( my hair thrived with cathy howse method a few years back.) oil scalp with sulfer base (1-2x week) protective styling (besides ponytails) moisturize and seal daily. Limit varity of products. Incorporate garlic tx.

    Estimated date of full recovery: not sure

    past length- bsl
    current length apl
     
  19. IDareT'sHair

    IDareT'sHair Get Your Haul On

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    Setback: Occurred in November/December of 2008. Weekly Salon Client. Stylist was in the Habit of Overprocessing, Doubleprocessing, Overlapping, Poor Neutralization and overall negligence.

    Effects: Loss of 90% of my Hair. Lost Massive amounts of Hair. Broke Completely all the Way down to the New Growth in various areas all over scalp.

    Plan of Action: Immediately gave up my Weekly Salon Status I carried for 25+ years (at somebody's Salon). Prayed over my Head and Repented for the Cast of Characters I had up in My Head Over the Years that didn't Care a Thing about My Hair.:perplexed

    Swore off the Salon. Became determined to become a DIY and Found LHCF. Stopped Relaxing. Incorporated Protein & Moisture on a Weekly Basis. Got my Porosity under control.

    And, even though I knew absolutely "nothing" about how to take care of my care (because I always paid somebody to do that) I began to research the threads daily and mapped out a Solid Plan of Action.:look:

    Spent the Money I would spend weekly at a Salon on the Best Products a Good Dryer and a Steamer and took control over my own Hair's Destiny. No Heat, Little Manipulation etc.......Just Babying My Hair Along.

    Estimated Date of Full Recovery: I'm on a 2 year Plan
     
    Last edited: Aug 22, 2009
  20. FluffyRed

    FluffyRed New Member

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    Setback: Abusing ACV!!! during a relaxer

    Effects: dull hair, brittleness

    Plan of action: keep doing moisture cons, and if that doesn't fix it, I may do a corrective to break down the protein, as was mentioned above. If all else fails, I can get that graduated bob cut that has me like :thud: and start this ish ovah!!!

    Estimated date of full recovery: December 18th (4 months recovery time) (I'll work with that)
     
  21. Nayeli

    Nayeli Well-Known Member

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    Here's a group hug for you 4mia. :grouphug: Terribly sorry about the loss of your son.

    If the Cathy Howse regimen was working for you, you should definitely go back to it. I've noticed that a lot of us in this thread were on the right track, doing all the right things (ie. the things that worked for us) and then decided to switch it up :blush:
    You already proved that you can grow long and strong - you certainly can do it again.

    Thanks for coming aboard everyone!
     
  22. Desarae

    Desarae Well-Known Member

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    I'm really thinking i'm going to cut my hair today. I'm so sad about it because I knew better. My hair was shorter than it is now (but still MY longest ever) but really damaged when I found the forum. I BC'd and grew it all back healthy over the past 2 years.

    My hair was doing so good before I did all that crap to it, and now I have to start all over. I don't even want this hair that's hanging off my scalp anymore.
     
  23. hopeful

    hopeful Well-Known Member

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    ((((Hugs))))
    I know how you feel.
     
    Last edited: Oct 23, 2009
  24. SelfStyled

    SelfStyled Well-Known Member

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    ((((Hugs)))) to all. Nayeli thank you so much for starting this. I feel like my whole journey has been one big ol' setback. The 1st was a corrective gone wrong at the salon. My ends slowly broke off and I had to cut it into a bob in Mar 08. I am really not sure what the cause of my current setback is , the end results are crispy/fuzzy ends. I think possible culprits are, air drying in a pony, and not trimming often enough.

    My remedy to get back on track is I will be doing a modified Cathy Howse regimen(I will be using my own conditioners). I will wash and DC every 4 days. On my next relaxer I will cut some more of my damaged ends.

    I think my ends should be on track by December, I am giving myself 6 months to completely get it together.
     
  25. yodie

    yodie Well-Known Member

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    It's okay. You'll get there. I'm basically starting all over (AGAIN) too.

    Next year this time we'll all be a lil' further along. Hip, hip hooray to healthier and wiser hair care practices.
     
    Last edited: Aug 22, 2009
  26. yodie

    yodie Well-Known Member

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    Great thread!! Thanks, OP.

    Setback: Trying too many different things I see on this board. Can't blame anyone but myself. Dye, MT, texlaxing, etc. Protective styled too long without checking the health of my hair.

    Effects: Strands split all the way up the shaft. Hair thinned, breaks easily.

    Plan of Action: Started wearing tracks to give my hair a rest. Now, I'm starting all over with a shorter cut, wearing my own hair, deep conditioning on a regular basis, Cap'Energy vits, keeping everything SIMPLE.

    Estimated Date: Not really focusing on that. I'm moreso concentrating on getting my hair healthy.
     
    Last edited: Aug 22, 2009
  27. hopeful

    hopeful Well-Known Member

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    This is a really nice thread. Thank you Nayeli for starting it.

    I have been pretty much suffering in silence.

    I joined this board nearly 5 years ago. December will be my 5-year anniversary. I came here with severely damaged, broken, relaxed hair. Here is a timeline:
    January 2005-big chopped :yay:

    July 2005-Setback #1:I could not figure out what to do with my hair:nono:. I was overwhelmed. I was angry that I had two distinct textures and that I couldn't wash n go easily. I was always trying to get my "curls" to pop. And I wanted to show my length. So, I texturized then completely relaxed. All of my old problems returned :cry:.

    March 2006: Big chopped again! Yay me, lol.
    This time I had a lot more knowledge. I finally realized I don't have curly hair!!! My hair is beautifully kinky:). And when I hit six months and got that itch this time I was ready:grin:. I twisted it up and wore a wig till I was one year natural. So it was all easy peasy lemon squeezy till I reached 2 years natural. It would take me about 5 hours to deep condition, detangle and twist. Something in me just kind of broke and I couldn't do it anymore. I wanted to wear a wig but couldn't get all that hair under a wig:nono:. Why didn't I get braids put in or kinky twists? Something.:whyme:

    July 2008-Setback #2: I texturized my beautiful, thick, natural hair. Some sections as long as 15 inches--over a foot of hair. Intially it was beautiful. But eventually my strands weakend, I used too much heat, and it began to break again. My hair had reached the longest length it had ever been in my entire life and I threw it all away because I wasn't patient enough.

    My hair is not what it was though when I first came to lhcf and I still have a nice length and enough to wear in a nice updo but I have lost so much volume and health. I am heartbroken.

    Oh almost forgot the final setback.
    June 2009-Setback #3 I had not relaxed in 6 months and was planning on transitioning, but relaxed anyway. Well, I lost more hair than I ever had--it was horrible. Just so much hair:sad:.

    So here I sit determined to never relax again and get back all of my length and more. I suppose I am on at least a 2 year plan.
     
  28. Kimiche

    Kimiche Well-Known Member

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    Thanks OP this is just the thing I need to talk about. I mentioned my setback in another thread. I was approaching APL when I made the mistake of using MT improperly. In other words I put it on my scalp everyday and it didn't agree with my hair.

    My hair was already thick and strong, so it couldn't take all of that protein. I lost a lot of hair and my hair stylist was even wondering what happened to my hair. Plus my hair was shedding a lot during that time as well. :wallbash: Yes I learned the hard way, never again. So I am on the road to recovering from my setback.

    Setback: Protein overload/MT, lack of moisture

    Effects: breakage, dry uneven hair underneath

    Plan of action: Use protein only when needed, find a good daily moisturizer that penetrates my entire head of hair, Seal ends with castor oil which I never did before and continue my weekly deep conditioning w/ moisture.

    Estimated date of full recovery: Anytime, as long as I get my hair back to the way it was and some. I want my hair back!!
     
    Last edited: Aug 22, 2009
  29. Nayeli

    Nayeli Well-Known Member

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    I'm so happy about such a positive reaction to the thread ladies! Thanks for joining us.

    I identify with a lot of the thoughts in the thread. DesiRae, I was contemplating taking a scissors and having a go myself. Hopeful, we are >>>here<<<. During my last relaxer, I thought I was going to bust out crying at the sink. Heaps of hair were just coming out while my hair was being washed.

    The theme of the day seems to be back to basics, and that's exactly what I'm doing. I'm only on day three of BT and already I've noticed significantly less shedding and breakage. I'm now remembering why I fell in love with it in the first place.

    I'm also seeing a lot of older heads in this thread, proving not only that we CAN do this, but even more encouraging, that we KNOW HOW.
     
  30. tdwillis

    tdwillis Well-Known Member

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    Nayeli, what an awesome thread. I agree with another post that I thought I was suffering in silence as well.
    Setback: Flatironing weekly. I am natural so my hair doesn't like it much.

    Effects: Oddly enough, just one section of my hair (on the right only) doesn't revert when wet. It is completely straight. Went to a salon that focused on healthy hair and they decided not to chop it off, but chopped off the rest.

    Plan of action: I really don't want to cut this off, so I will try more protein treatments. Cut down flatironing to twice a month (just purchased the FHI Runway), deep condition as much as possible. Wear two strand twists as often as possible.

    Estimated date of full recovery: January 2010
     

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