SHS stylist are not your friends

[ms.blue]

I had one from middle school through high school. She was the type to quickly cut your hair w/o you asking. She tell us it will make my sister and hair grow if we get our hair "trimmed" every relaxer every 3 months. My sister will fight w/ her every time about the "trim". I would just go along & I wouldn't see any new length for about 2 years. At one point I thought my hair didn't grow as fast as my sister but I knew my hair growing cuz I needed a touch up. I finally peeped her game & would also fight her about her 2 inch "trims" that is when I started seeing actually length. She didn't like anyone w/ longer hair then her. I saw her recently and all that hair was gone!

 

[laurend085]

I have been guilty of saying "do whatever looks best", letting a stylist trim right after a wash, or trimming whenever they think it's necessary such as if my ends are dry because I don't know,. I'm trying to learn about my hair now so how do you know when to trim or how much to trim?

 

[beans4reezy]

It's been a year and a half since my last trim due to a SHS.

 

[hair4romheaven]

Let me tell my story...i found a stylist on a hair board that I love **cough cough** ;-)
Everyone bragged about her so I went to her for a texlax. I was 8mnths post. Why did she comb a super texturizer through to my ends. I freaked out she washed it out and I ended up with bone straight SL hair. I was APL so not only did she ruin my thick hair she cut it off. So i had to start over!!!! *&^$#@$@%%$@#%@@ I'm better now LOL.
I have yet to find someone to do my hair in ATLANTA!!!

 

[mEmYSELFaNDj]

Thanks for all the great tips!

 

[Lucia]

I had one from middle school through high school. She was the type to quickly cut your hair w/o you asking. She tell us it will make my sister and hair grow if we get our hair "trimmed" every relaxer every 3 months. My sister will fight w/ her every time about the "trim". I would just go along & I wouldn't see any new length for about 2 years. At one point I thought my hair didn't grow as fast as my sister but I knew my hair growing cuz I needed a touch up. I finally peeped her game & would also fight her about her 2 inch "trims" that is when I started seeing actually length. She didn't like anyone w/ longer hair then her. I saw her recently and all that hair was gone!

OH yeah jealousy is BIG, they don't want to see people with hair longer than them or for you to feel prettier or confident, it's really mean. And don't think the men stylists don't get jealous too, they do. the story I gave in the OP that stylist was a man.

I heard a story about a woman who came from another country where they wear they're hair longer on average BSL and beyond, and she got a touch up and the lady trimmed 4 inches off and her husband came to the salon and put the fear of God in the stylist and threatened to sue her and the salon, the owner.

My cousin had BSL hair, this lady kept saying oh your hairs so pretty I can take good care of your hair, she went to her and this stylist cut it back to SL.
Besides my own set back I've talked to a lot of people about their bad salon experiences and there's a lot women walking around mad about their hair.

 

[laurend085]

I'm going to get a sew-in from my stylist on Friday. When I last saw her a few months ago she shaved my nape. Now I had a short asymmetrical short cut which had my nape shaved. The nape had grown out some and I had told her I was going to grow my hair back out. Well she shaved my nape saying that I need to shave it until the rest of the hair grows back long enough to cover it and she will gradually trim it as it grows to make it all even. My nape is now about how it was when she shaved it maybe a little longer.

THE PLAN
I'm going to tell her that I don't want my hair trimmed (or shaved) at all when I go Friday.

I have never not gotten my hair trimmed, but I'm going to see how this works out because I'd always been told that you have to trim it for it to grow esp. if you have dry ends

 

[Lucia]

I have been guilty of saying "do whatever looks best", letting a stylist trim right after a wash, or trimming whenever they think it's necessary such as if my ends are dry because I don't know,. I'm trying to learn about my hair now so how do you know when to trim or how much to trim?

You can look at our ends in a magnified mirror if your hair's too short to pull the ends in front of you. But you can feel the single strand knots, and see the splits.
Take your time there aren't as many as those stylists make you believe. it usually looks like a Y at the very tip end of your hair. My hair's uneven now again b/c I'm growing towards a new goal, that doesn't mean it's split or damaged, it's just not a clean even hemline. But it was uneven before and mostly evened up in my avatar pic, check my fotki you'll see the way it grows uneven.

Here's another example of uneven hair, her hair is long and healthy though-notice how much longer it is before the trim

before:
http://public.fotki.com/redhotlala/february-2010-upate/old-throw-back-from.html

later once she reached a length she liked, she got it evened up but they still cut too much off

http://public.fotki.com/redhotlala/hairfotki/may222009008.html

Now it's at a length she wants and it's evened up

http://public.fotki.com/redhotlala/february-2010-upate/q9.html#media

 

[dontspeakdefeat]

I am sorry that this continues to happen to women. Please when you sit in the stylist chair speak up and be very firm about what you want. Sometimes you have to make stylist listen.

 

[shopgalore]

Sometimes I think some people are a bit scared to simply speak their mind, no one should be able to tell you about cutting and triming, these stylists get away with so much.

 

[Lucia]

I am sorry that this continues to happen to women. Please when you sit in the stylist chair speak up and be very firm about what you want. Sometimes you have to make stylist listen.

Thanks, but most stylist aren't like you, they really don't care about hair they just care about the style, and cutting seems to be the only way they can style anybody and you can't grow your hair out cause it will be uneven.
I have been to salon last summer to get an updo for a wedding, I stated up front all I want is the updo period. When she still came out of pocket with the your ends are raggedy line you need a trim. Since I needed all my length for this style, she didn't have much of an argument to cut my hair, but I've never gone back.

 

[Lucia]

So so true - I've seen it myself, I've had friends on the phone crying to me about their stylists (who they even regard as friends) who have choppoed off their long hair!

I've been going to my stylist for about 15 years but it's only in the last two years that she's seen me retain growth. Funny thing is, it's only in the last two years that she has asked (consistently) if I want a trim. erplexed I'm going to see her next in June for my touch up, and with any luck I'll be nearer to APL at that point. It'll be interesting to see how persistent she is to trim my hair. Regardless she will not be cutting it!

Watch your back, she sounds like she's determined to keep you at the length SHE dictates is best for you, not what you want.

 

[Nayna]

Yea. I had an orientation for beauty school and everyone there kept harping on about cutting and all that. You should've seen their eyes. All wide and eager. A lot of the students had their hair all cut up and ish. I know some people like those edgy cuts and all, but that isn't for everyone. I don't know what's going to happen when I start officially because I hate to hear nonsense. Lol.

 

[Lucia]

this happened to another member here, scroll down to MzMoMo
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=435248&page=5

 

[dontspeakdefeat]

Thanks, but most stylist aren't like you, they really don't care about hair they just care about the style, and cutting seems to be the only way they can style anybody and you can't grow your hair out cause it will be uneven.
I have been to salon last summer to get an updo for a wedding, I stated up front all I want is the updo period. When she still came out of pocket with the your ends are raggedy line you need a trim. Since I needed all my length for this style, she didn't have much of an argument to cut my hair, but I've never gone back.

I know and it's very unfortunate.

 

[Vashti]

I haven't been to a stylist in years for this very reason. The old "you gotta trim it if you want it to grow out healthy" crap. Yeah, right!

I had a pretty good stylist back when I was wearing a perm but even she loved to cut me and my sister's hair instead of actually trimming it. My hair never went past the bottom of my neck when she took care of it and my sister's hair, which was long at the time, kept getting shorter and shorter. A lot of them are obsessed with blunt cuts or evenly trimmed manes (or at least that's what they claim). I can see the need for getting a trim if your ends are split or unhealthy but they use that as an excuse to give you a hair cut! A trim ain't a hair cut! That's why I think it's best to learn how to do it yourself!

 

[peachykeen]

Lucia, thank you so much for starting this thread. I am a recent victim. I was getting my rant on in the Too Groovy Thread. These stylists are like used car salesmen, they think it's their job to sell you a hyundai and make you feel like it's a cadillac.

The roof doesn't have a whole in it, it's just a sun roof. Your hair isnt growing like a regular human being, it's "splitting" or "uneven". Your hair doesn't need a break from chemicals. "You just don't come to the salon often enough to get the split ends cut off"

How about you keep your scissor happy hands away from my hair and take care of that one inch on your head. How about you do what I ask you to do since I am paying you. If you want a career where you dont have to listen to other people's opinion all day than don't go into a service field. Especially not one that you have to work "on" someone.

 

[hillytmj]

Thanks for this helpful post. We all need reminders on how to avoid the SHS.

 

[Janet']

SHS know how to work the right "angle"...the reality is that many women depend on their stylist to be the "expert" in healthy hair care and so many times, that just isn't the case.

 

[Fine 4s]

Thanks for the reminder Lucia!
I simply don't go to salons and when I do, it's for a trim and blow.
My concern with my stylist is that he doesn't cut enough!
You are right about observing the clients hair health and length b/c my guy loves long hair and it shows.

 

[Lucia]

SHS know how to work the right "angle"...the reality is that many women depend on their stylist to be the "expert" in healthy hair care and so many times, that just isn't the case.

It's best to become your own hair expert. A stylist can't possibly know how to work your hair and 50 other clients heads or have the patience to really take time with your hair, but you can and every head of hair is unique unless you're an identical twin, so it's worth the time, effort, patience, and possible PJ-ism to find out what works for your unique hair.

Thanks for the reminder Lucia!
I simply don't go to salons and when I do, it's for a trim and blow.
My concern with my stylist is that he doesn't cut enough!
You are right about observing the clients hair health and length b/c my guy loves long hair and it shows.

You're lucky, but don't get lazy or complacent always be firm and stay in charge of your hair and stay on top of your info and what really works for you just in case you have to b/c a DIYer if dude leaves that salon.

 

[KSand]

You're right about the SHS. My SHS made me run me to this forum to try to grow my hair back. She said I had damage and she needed to trim... she ending up cutting one side almost two inches (see the sig).

I should have known because everyone is always leaving her chair with less hair than what they started with.

 

[Moopeh]

Last Christmas an evil SHS chemically burnt my scalp with bleach and gave me a tiny afro mullet. She was an eye rolling, bad weave totting mess, applied the color before even talking to me about it, I thought she was washing my hair! I think she was jealous. At the time I had really bad anxiety problems, I didn't have the courage to get angry and not pay or to sue. I had to go to the hospital and everything, my scalp hasn't been the same since...

Some people are bitter and hateful. I would think a stylist would be HAPPY to make their customers happy. What is wrong with these people that we have to fight with them to get a good haircut??

Nope no more. I'm going to a reputable place now. I don't care how much it costs, I need my hair cut properly by someone who understands customer satisfaction.

 

[Ashleescheveux]

I just got my hair cut today. She said she'd trim it, but now its from almost APL to hardly SL. Im not TOO mad because I was going to get a haircut anyways to get rid of my raggedy ends but I dont appreciate her forcing it on me.

She was SO disrespectful. She said my hair was over processed (its not) and that I need to cut all of it off. She said all the tangles I had (from HER harsh shampooing) was caused by over processing. I wanted to cut her so badly.

 

[tasha7239]

WOW its crazy we all have the same horror stories. I could have been APL alreay if I would have not gotten two cuts that I didnt want. I use to be a SHS dream. I didnt care what they did... cut it too short, relax to early whatever they felt was best. I guess that is why I have been SL for two yearserplexed. I just got a relaxer about three weeks ago and when she asked me if I wanted my ends trimmed I said no she said nothing but I was ready to go round for round with her. I am soo for growing my hair to BSL that if a SHS just was to cut off my progess without my consent she would sue me because she would get a beat down. I hope to be a completly DYI soon.

OP this is a great thread and your hair is FAB!

 

[Lucia]

I just got my hair cut today. She said she'd trim it, but now its from almost APL to hardly SL. Im not TOO mad because I was going to get a haircut anyways to get rid of my raggedy ends but I dont appreciate her forcing it on me.

She was SO disrespectful. She said my hair was over processed (its not) and that I need to cut all of it off. She said all the tangles I had (from HER harsh shampooing) was caused by over processing. I wanted to cut her so badly.

Yeah you got to talk to them first and observe who's in the salon what does they're hair look like, more important what does the tylist hair look like. Is her hair short, are her clients hair short then she won't let you grow your hair out longer than hers.
Just don't ever go back to her, learn the online DIY trims and cuts and YT is a great resource. If were paying them to do what we want why should they get away with doing what they want, that ain't right.

You're right about the SHS. My SHS made me run me to this forum to try to grow my hair back. She said I had damage and she needed to trim... she ending up cutting one side almost two inches (see the sig).

I should have known because everyone is always leaving her chair with less hair than what they started with.

Exactly, that's a BIG RED FLAG

Last Christmas an evil SHS chemically burnt my scalp with bleach and gave me a tiny afro mullet. She was an eye rolling, bad weave totting mess, applied the color before even talking to me about it, I thought she was washing my hair! I think she was jealous. At the time I had really bad anxiety problems, I didn't have the courage to get angry and not pay or to sue. I had to go to the hospital and everything, my scalp hasn't been the same since...

Some people are bitter and hateful. I would think a stylist would be HAPPY to make their customers happy. What is wrong with these people that we have to fight with them to get a good haircut??

Nope no more. I'm going to a reputable place now. I don't care how much it costs, I need my hair cut properly by someone who understands customer satisfaction.

How did that happen, did you even ask for hair color? Sometimes I think I'll never step foot in a salon again. Besides I get the results I want at home doing it myself.

WOW its crazy we all have the same horror stories. I could have been APL alreay if I would have not gotten two cuts that I didnt want. I use to be a SHS dream. I didnt care what they did... cut it too short, relax to early whatever they felt was best. I guess that is why I have been SL for two yearserplexed. I just got a relaxer about three weeks ago and when she asked me if I wanted my ends trimmed I said no she said nothing but I was ready to go round for round with her. I am soo for growing my hair to BSL that if a SHS just was to cut off my progess without my consent she would sue me because she would get a beat down. I hope to be a completly DYI soon.

OP this is a great thread and your hair is FAB!

Thanks, ITA DIY is the only way to go. I learn alot from LHD's (long haired Divas) on YT and fotki. YT even has pro's giving hairstyling how to's, so I get ideas and tips from them.

 

[Embyra]

smh this thread is the TRUTH!!!! it needs to be a sticky i posted my story b4 long story short i always stretch my relaxers even b4 this site so when i go to the hairdressers i have a ton of new growth
so the last time i went there 2 years ago in october she cut 6 inches off my hair i didnt even get a chance to see my length but i felt it on my back so i thought ok a lil trim the ***** took of 6 inches i had tears in my eyes for real but kept them back till i got home

i looked on the floor and saw LONG HEALTHY strands of hair lying on the floor when i got home i looked in the mirror my hair was more or less neck length i never had hair that length in my life even as a child

when i think about it going there was always something with them and there trims to make it healthy/even/to grow this time havent seen the hairdresser real hair in the what 10 years i been there

i would always be thinking of what to tell them for why i dont want a trim cus i didnt trust them sometimes they would do it ok but they always kept my hair at the same length

i will never go back there and will buy a split ender and do my trimming myself

They trimmed a little too many times but that last time showed me how far jealously will push people dont let them set you back YEARS in the blink of a eye

 

[MileHighDiva]

I posted this from my blog, and yes it's scissor happy stylist, but the other version works too

Lucia, what is the name of your blog and/or the link? I loved this thread!

 

[Lucia]

MileHighDiva

I moved my blog here, just go to the right of my name where it says posts: # it says blog and has a linked number that will tkae you to my blog. or the links below. I haven't updated in a long time though.


http://www.longhaircareforum.com/blog.php?u=42

http://www.longhaircareforum.com/blog.php?b=3317

 

[Lucia]

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