Was our hair meant to be this difficult?

[Sui Topi]

I agree with the others - our hair is soooo simple and easy to care for. Provided that one doesn't try to make it into something it really isn't.
Like for instance wanting stick straight hair 365 days a year when the hair is really a 3b-4b

Imagine how difficult it would be for a white woman to achieve a perfect 4b afro every morning She would have difficult hair for sure! And destroyed by chemicals and heat appliances!!!

Great perspective!

Kinda a spinoff of what you are saying, but has anyone ever pondered this for instance: why are we born with straight or soft, loosely coiled hair? I have YET to see a black baby born with kinky, coily, unmanageable hair. Why can't we keep this type of hair? Personally, I think it's just the work of homeobox genes. We get to keep this type of hair for a short while because that's what we were first given but due to other factors that happened in our history another set of genes (like what they are saying about the African climate) switches on so our hair no longer grows in the loosely coiled texture that it first did. Because I mean, everyone came from Africa and some people migrated while others stayed and worked the harsh climate. If the climate wasn't a factor in changing our hair texture, then why doesn't everyone (even the whites who migrated) have the same texture of hair and why aren't we all born with the kinky, coily hair to begin with?

Someone needs to investigate this. If they already have, please post some scientific articles explaining this.




Not everybaby is born with soft and wavy hair. I once saw a baby with tightly coiled 4b hair, and he was a newborn. I thought it was the strangest thing ever- not because of his hair type, but because I never saw a baby with such tightly coiled hair. His hair was in tight little coils the size of ball point pen. So it is not unusual.

I find the more I try to fight my hair, the more problems I have.Also, some people or other races with 1b hair amire and envy our hair. My Chinese freinds in junior high always asked me "How could I get my hair like that?"
I thought it was so strange because all the black kids called me names and laughed at me with my scarf pushed back with a big fro.

Interesteeeeeeeeeeeeed

 

[bludaydreamr]

What I am getting it is this. I just do not feel that God org intend for our hair to be 4a/4a texture. Yes it is beautiful, yes it is all that, but it also if very hard to maintain, whether you have a simple routine or not, you still have to look out for a lot of things to keep it from damaging compared to other races. Yes true they have their issue but not nearly as many as we do.

I really wish I did not feel this way and have asked God to change my thinking and deal with it. It is sad this I know.

Also I am not saying short hair can not be sexy, attractive etc.., it is just not what I want for me.

I am only trying to discover the real reason my hair is the way it is and it goes deeper then genes I believe. I feel some element or person along the way placed a part in it.[/quote]

We can ask; why is an apple red and an orange orange? Both are fruit, but an apple will never be an orange and an orange an apple. When it comes down to it is because of the genetic makeup.

I can understand your frustration, for this is the first time in my life I have had to deal with my natural hair. The very reason I found this site had to do with my fears. I was having a reoccuring dream about relaxing my hair, and had never attempted to relax my hair myself. Even though I never felt I had self esteem issuses( I've always been confident); I knew sub-consciously somethings scared the hell out of me about going natural, and I went on a search to find out if there were others, and how they dealt.

I was constantly told by my father, my dark-skin was beautiful. I also know growing up, I was always told that my hair is nappy(not kinky, not curly, or coily) nothing else was ever used to describe my hair. Or I was told my cosmetologist Aunt that SL might be my terminal length when my "lighter" skinned cousins with "good" hair had hair to the middle of their backs.

It wasn't until I came here, and did an obscene amount of lurking;(I never knew that black women relaxed and natural could grow and maintain long hair, unless you had "good hair".) I find that what I thought about my hair was a myth; a myth perpetuated, and passed down from generation to generation.

I said all that to say; once I realized I had been lied to, and threw everything that I thought about my hair, and the maintenance of it out the door. I started to embrace my hair for what it can and can't do, and for me things finally fell into place.

OP, IMO you can't get over what your hair can and can't do.

*reads entire thread*

*shakes her head*

I don't even know where to start. Our hair is only 'difficult' because we are trying to get it to do stuff that isn't NATURAL to it. When I was perming my hair - it was VERY difficult because MY hair doesn't LIKE being straight. When I had locks, my hair was VERY easy because it LIKED being tangled around itself. My hair is now loose, and it's NOT difficult - because I KNOW that I can't comb it everyday. I KNOW that it's pointless for me to try to have straight 'swanging' hair in the humidity of the south. I KNOW that it NEEDS moisture on a daily basis. I KNOW that it wants to be protected - and it's MY duty as a steward of my hair to give it what it NEEDS.

Getting upset with my hair for WANTING to do what is NATURAL for it do (or with God for giving me this hair - what nerve! He coulda made us all bald, THEN where would we be?) is like getting upset with a dog for not meowing and purring. Like getting upset with a fish for not being able to breathe air. Like getting upset with my skin for not being able to show purple tattoos.... it's pointless and it's frustrating and it's not going to do ANYTHING but twist me up inside and get me upset and cause me to look down on the natural beauty and wonder that is ME.

Sweet Mother of us all, ya'll - we don't HAVE straight hair. We don't HAVE hair that we can let dry out and bleach and fry and dye and burn and expect it to still be beatiful and healthy and full. And to wonder why is like to wonder why MOST of us don't have green eyes. And instead of loving our hair as extensions of ourself, and honoring it (and thus honoring OURSELVES) by treating it with the gentle, slow, LOVING care that it deserves and NEEDS - we beat ourselves against a wall trying for something that we can't get. DO I REALLY want hair that I can abuse and it still look good? No - because abusing my hair is abusing myself, and I LOVE me way too much to do something like that.

It ain't even ABOUT loving 'nappy' hair - it's about loving YOUR hair.

*shakes head*

Asking God why he gave us this hair....and then turning around and praying for it to grow.

I completed agree with this and with several other post you have made in this thread.

 

[jahzyira]

to be honest i really dont think our hair is difficult its jus those damn hair products that these fake companies make for "african americans" thats effin up our hair after being on the hair boards for almost a year i can finally say that its a freaking conspiracy going around if you think about it why do most hair products geared towards african americans are full of crap for years i never knew why my hair was still dry after using pink moisture thats cause mineral oil isnt moisturizing at all but from the knowledge ive gained i know now that it takes lots of nourishing ingredients to make our hair soft and beautiful my real frustration is why isnt there a major product line for us??? altho im really amazed and excited at the black women that took it upon themselves to create the hair products that we need and i know there are some high end products geared towards aa's but why isnt there a serious company out there creating something all natural nourishing strenthening and growth promoting specifically for our hair that doesnt cost hundreds of dollars an oz????.............

 

[cupcakes]

In the journey to acheive healthy, longer hair it is very overwhelming.


Our hair is something else. I can't take it anymore. Chemicals, heat , the wrong diet, protective stlyes, wrong products, to many of the right products , oils, grease, wrong clothing, braids,weaves,wigs, using the wrong tools, brushing,combing, using to many product, using not enough products, you name it causes damages. Everything that you can possible do for our hair seems to cause damage. There seems that there is nothing out there that does not cause damage to our hair. Proper care is key, but you have to go to great lengths to get it and never stop once you have master the art of what it takes for your hair. This can get very costly and time consuming, because what works for one may not work other as we find out in updated threads.

I firmly believe that God did not design our hair to be so fragile. I believe that someone way back in the day messed it up for us. I never heard of other races having to tie up their hair in silk or satin to prevent it from spliting or having to add oil etc... I know they have issues to but not as fragile as ours.

Sorry so long I am just frustrated. I thought I had my regimen down and now have to revise it.

its true,,, i have been wondering about this alot lately

 

[cocoberry10]

What I am getting it is this. I just do not feel that God org intend for our hair to be 4a/4a texture. Yes it is beautiful, yes it is all that, but it also if very hard to maintain, whether you have a simple routine or not, you still have to look out for a lot of things to keep it from damaging compared to other races. Yes true they have their issue but not nearly as many as we do.

I really wish I did not feel this way and have asked God to change my thinking and deal with it. It is sad this I know.

Also I am not saying short hair can not be sexy, attractive etc.., it is just not what I want for me.

I am only trying to discover the real reason my hair is the way it is and it goes deeper then genes I believe. I feel some element or person along the way placed a part in it.[/quote]

We can ask; why is an apple red and an orange orange? Both are fruit, but an apple will never be an orange and an orange an apple. When it comes down to it is because of the genetic makeup.

I can understand your frustration, for this is the first time in my life I have had to deal with my natural hair. The very reason I found this site had to do with my fears. I was having a reoccuring dream about relaxing my hair, and had never attempted to relax my hair myself. Even though I never felt I had self esteem issuses( I've always been confident); I knew sub-consciously somethings scared the hell out of me about going natural, and I went on a search to find out if there were others, and how they dealt.

I was constantly told by my father, my dark-skin was beautiful. I also know growing up, I was always told that my hair is nappy(not kinky, not curly, or coily) nothing else was ever used to describe my hair. Or I was told my cosmetologist Aunt that SL might be my terminal length when my "lighter" skinned cousins with "good" hair had hair to the middle of their backs.

It wasn't until I came here, and did an obscene amount of lurking;(I never knew that black women relaxed and natural could grow and maintain long hair, unless you had "good hair".) I find that what I thought about my hair was a myth; a myth perpetuated, and passed down from generation to generation.

I said all that to say; once I realized I had been lied to, and threw everything that I thought about my hair, and the maintenance of it out the door. I started to embrace my hair for what it can and can't do, and for me things finally fell into place.

OP, IMO you can't get over what your hair can and can't do.




I completed agree with this and with several other post you have made in this thread.

I agree with you!

 

[MD_Lady]

I believe we have the most beautiful, versatile hair in the world. Haircare can be easy once we learn how. The same applies to all hair types.

God made our hair perfectly. The struggle some people have is working against their hair, trying to make it appear according to someone else's standard.

For me, I make sure my hair journey is totally fun and it has been. That's what makes it easy and something to look forward to.

That is a FANTASTIC point!

 

[2themax]

Overall, I believe that we have been lied to about our hair (and other things) for soooooooo long that we had simply given up on our hair. As a result, we have not given it the time and care that it needs out of frustration. Those other than AA's have always been told how lovely, beautiful their hair (and other things) are and as a result, they gave it the time and care that it needed. Therefore, they saw positive results. After joining this website, I have learned so much about our hair and become more positive about our hair & less frustrated. We didn't have a website like this (for us) years ago. Now we do! Unfortunately, the other women have had these things for years and years and didn't let on to their little secrets. As usual, we excel in so many things. It's always been a struggle, but we always have come out on top. Now, take a look at your hair - long, medium or short - and say, "What do I want to do with my hair? Do I want it longer or shorter?" And then go for that goal. We're also taking better care of our health with all of the hair supplements that we're taking. It All Good! LOL!!

 

[pinkchocolatedaisy]

I really think it's a misconception that black people are the ONLY ones who do things (chemical/mechanical) to their hair because they aren't happy with how it grows out of their hair. Black people aren't the ONLY ones who struggle to grow their hair out - we are just the ones who fight our natural texture the most.

I definitely agree......you are so on it, girl!

 

[2themax]

bump...I agree also. I have visited other sites and see that there are plenty of women of other ethinicities who have hair problems. Some are even growth problems just like ours.

 

[Barbara]

I don't see having kinky hair as being as curse from God. It certainly isn't in the Bible. As I mentioned, there are white people in places like Russia, Croatia, etc. who are born with kinky hair.

Some here have stated our hair has a more coarse texture because of geographics (Africa) and climate. So, was there kinky hair before the Biblical flood? The climate was very different on this planet before the flood--its was temperate and more tropical, the same everywhere.

You got that right! Some Jews have very kinky hair. They use all sort of products to straighten it.

What I am saying is that God never intended for their to be pain during labor. Eve messed it up for us all. To my knowlege women still experience pain during delievry and have to rely on pain killers to stop it.

How does one have a pain free delivery? With out medicine, meditation, etc...

it is suppose to come natural without any help.

I do not blame God for our hair texure nor am I angry with him about it.

I am just trying to figure out why it is the way it is. Not to mention this has caused so much self hated in general for our race on this issue. I am not talking about us here at LHCF ers we know better. But look at the old generation and new ones coming up and how they view their image because of it.

I've heard quite a number of them make negative comments about their hair or other peoples' hair. Don't let these comments occur on the bus.

 

[Junebug D]

Our hair was meant to loc. It is difficult only because we are trying to get it to do something it doesn't want to do. If East Asian people wanted to get & maintain an Afro, they'd be complaining and have damaged hair as well, because they'd be fighting nature as well.

 

[Kurlee]

Our hair was meant to loc. It is difficult only because we are trying to get it to do something it doesn't want to do. If East Asian people wanted to get & maintain an Afro, they'd be complaining and have damaged hair as well, because they'd be fighting nature as well.

could you elaborate ON THE BOLDED?

 

[aquajoyice]

I think this is a good hair discussion topic and I hope others chime in.

I was watching the discovery channel one day and it was talking about how different "races" came about. Basicly life began in Africa, but diff. people migrated to diff. areas which had some effect on our features.

It was said in the program ,that due to the climate (hot and humid) of Africa, that Africans weren't really 'designed' to have long hair. That our hair was genetically short to keep us cool and that the coils/napps kept the sun from burning our skin on top of our heads. And white people have long hair to protect them from the cold/wind and other elements from habitating on the Northern hemisphere. And so on and so on...

Don't know how true it is. But it makes (sort of) sense to me.

But often I find myself pondering like you. Like what was GOD's intention when he created diff. ethnic 'features. Anyways, this is a good topic.

Your on the right track and I believe that all of God's creature's were created perfectly. God didn't create us to fit into fashion trends.. he created us to survive in our environment and the strongest will survive. Like animals that adapt to their surroundings for survival, same thing happened to us. God didn't sit there and say "Let me make it harder for African's and give them difficult hair" I think God has bigger fish to fry than how hard it may be for us to straighten our hair.

 

[aquajoyice]

to be honest i really dont think our hair is difficult its jus those damn hair products that these fake companies make for "african americans" thats effin up our hair after being on the hair boards for almost a year i can finally say that its a freaking conspiracy going around if you think about it why do most hair products geared towards african americans are full of crap for years i never knew why my hair was still dry after using pink moisture thats cause mineral oil isnt moisturizing at all but from the knowledge ive gained i know now that it takes lots of nourishing ingredients to make our hair soft and beautiful my real frustration is why isnt there a major product line for us??? altho im really amazed and excited at the black women that took it upon themselves to create the hair products that we need and i know there are some high end products geared towards aa's but why isnt there a serious company out there creating something all natural nourishing strenthening and growth promoting specifically for our hair that doesnt cost hundreds of dollars an oz????.............

I completely feel you on the conspiracy theory. Because when I realized all the BS these companies try to sell us I was appalled. And then I realized that Blacks have always had it hard since the moments we got here. We've had to blow the top off of a lot of crap that society tried to get us to believe. And I believe that hair care is another lid that's getting blown. And what better way to make AA's feel inferior than with our looks. So make the standard of beauty to hard to attain that we do more damage than anything. Because our hair wasn't made to do certain things. So don't condemn your hair comdemn the idea that there is only one type of beauty. Because as we all know now beauty is also Black and Nappy!

 

[beans4reezy]

Our hair was meant to loc.

Very interesting. Would you be able to support this assertion? I am curious to know where you drew this conclusion from. TIA

 

[Solitude]

But I DO love MY hair!!!! And like another poster stated, we can do so much with ours. And look at how now we DO see other races that have straight hair trying to go curly and wearing cornrows and locs, etc. I think we are an inspiration. Whenever I get braids or weaves or if I wear my hair flat ironed then the next day wavy (from my not so perfect braidouts when I was relaxed) or a rollerset, I always get "how did you do that to your hair? it's so pretty... wow you wear different styles all the time.. will that work on MY hair.?" I could go on and on. So I guess it's like with anyone there are pros and cons to things. The reality it seems is that we do need to give our hair a little more TLC but then those of other races need to give their SKIN a little extra TLC. I mean, compared to some of my non AA friends, I can easily go makeup free whereas with them, they wouldn't even think of it- and with good reason. So no God didn't make any mistakes.........we all have things about us that make us exceptionally beautiful and then other things we need to put the work in to be even more beautiful. Besides, I am having some major FUN learning about my hair and doing things to it.!

Yes, I have experienced this countless times. None of my non-AA friends or co-workers can wear the variety of styles that I can. They've always commented on that and I feel that their compliments are sincere.

I had been wearing my hair in a bun every day, then I wore my hair down. My co-worker had never seen my hair & she loved it. It was bouncy and swangin'- she says hers is lifeless, with no volume & she keeps it cut short rather than to deal with it. It took her a YEAR to grow it out past SL for her wedding.

I am someone who loves my hair just as much as the next person. But honestly in the grand scheme of things, hair doesn't really matter. However, I see your point.

ITA with this. Before LHCF, I swear, I never worried about my hair at all. I did it myself or got it done, and that was it. No big deal.

to be honest i really dont think our hair is difficult its jus those damn hair products that these fake companies make for "african americans" thats effin up our hair after being on the hair boards for almost a year i can finally say that its a freaking conspiracy going around if you think about it why do most hair products geared towards african americans are full of crap for years i never knew why my hair was still dry after using pink moisture thats cause mineral oil isnt moisturizing at all but from the knowledge ive gained i know now that it takes lots of nourishing ingredients to make our hair soft and beautiful my real frustration is why isnt there a major product line for us??? altho im really amazed and excited at the black women that took it upon themselves to create the hair products that we need and i know there are some high end products geared towards aa's but why isnt there a serious company out there creating something all natural nourishing strenthening and growth promoting specifically for our hair that doesnt cost hundreds of dollars an oz????.............

I, too, am happy to see so many women of color making fabulous, natural product for our hair.

However, I never had a problem using the stuff that's labeled as "bad" on this board; a lot of women need certain products - other women can use just about anything and their hair will still thrive. Most older women I know use all the LHCF "forbidden" products and as long as they have good hair care practices overall, their hair remains long and healthy.

I still use mineral oil, sulfates, etc. with no problems.

ETA: My hair is relaxed, though, so I don't know if my outlook would be the same if my hair was not chemically altered.

 

[msa]

Our hair is something else. I can't take it anymore. Chemicals, heat , the wrong diet, protective stlyes, wrong products, to many of the right products , oils, grease, wrong clothing, braids,weaves,wigs, using the wrong tools, brushing,combing, using to many product, using not enough products, you name it causes damages. Everything that you can possible do for our hair seems to cause damage. There seems that there is nothing out there that does not cause damage to our hair. Proper care is key, but you have to go to great lengths to get it and never stop once you have master the art of what it takes for your hair. This can get very costly and time consuming, because what works for one may not work other as we find out in updated threads.

Interesting.

My hair isn't fragile nor does it get damaged from regular day-to-day care. Furthermore, my hair isn't difficult. Frankly, I think we make it much harder than it needs to be.

 

[Junebug D]

Very interesting. Would you be able to support this assertion? I am curious to know where you drew this conclusion from. TIA

Just because of the way the strands constantly knot & wrap around each other. Even after combing it, it still clumps together and the strands are still desperately trying to grab each other. The strands don't separate or lay in place like straight hair or wavy or slightly curly hair will. I just believe that's what it's trying to do.

 

[beans4reezy]

Just because of the way the strands constantly knot & wrap around each other. Even after combing it, it still clumps together and the strands are still desperately trying to grab each other. The strands don't separate or lay in place like straight hair or wavy or slightly curly hair will. I just believe that's what it's trying to do.

Thanks for explaning...that does make sense though

 

[melissa-bee]

This is a great thread.

 

[Curlykale]

I was amazed when I poured some pure aloe juice or coconut oil into my hair for the first time. It was like those simple, natural substances were more suitable than ever. I started to think that it was easier than I thought.

Same things with tools and techniques. Most curly/textured heads are only meant to use our fingers or tools that are just like them, what if fine teeth combs have been invented by a Viking (Arulf Denman The Terrible )

Probably each head has a very simple way to be taken care of.

 

[SimJam]

Ive mentioned this several times on this board - my mother and I cannot believe how easy my hair is to manage now that Im doing what is wants.

as a child every sunday was stressful for both my mother nad myself because it was wash day, the washing wasnt the problem, the detangling and combing was. And this was because of the products and techniques being used/ or not used in some cases - like conditioner.

once we know how to care for our hair (Im referring to our hair in its natural state) and are allowing it to do what it was intended to do, then we're all good !!!

ETA: I believe that anyones hair (regardless of race) that has been chemically altered will then need specialized care. I think as a black women with relaxed hair I was not fully cognizant of this reality - hence the overlapping of relaxers, neglect of protein and moisture etc.

 

[LadyRaider]

If you try to consider it from God's perspective... why would He value long hair over short? Straight hair over kinky. I doubt the details of our hair was something He considered strongly in His plan.

Same thing with white folk's ol' raggedy, wrinkly fragile skin. What's wrong with wrinkly pale, brown-spotted skin? Nothing in God's eyes, I'm sure.

The characteristics that make our hair hard to manage are socially constructed. We weren't "made" to have difficult hair. It was determined by the society what is "good" and "bad."

 

[AlwaysNatural]

If you try to consider it from God's perspective... why would He value long hair over short? Straight hair over kinky. I doubt the details of our hair was something He considered strongly in His plan.

Same thing with white folk's ol' raggedy, wrinkly fragile skin. What's wrong with wrinkly pale, brown-spotted skin? Nothing in God's eyes, I'm sure.

The characteristics that make our hair hard to manage are socially constructed. We weren't "made" to have difficult hair. It was determined by the society what is "good" and "bad."

Um..............................................? lol..


Anyways ontopic

I feel the same way sometimes too, (the our hair being difficult thing) especially when going swimming..hair matts up, I see just about every race just wash, condition, throw in some mouse and they're gone...i'm still in there 1/2 hr later tryna detangle and braid my hair in two. However at home, i'm fine just a bit style challenged which causes difficulty for me most of the times..

 

[toufa]

Our hair was meant to loc. It is difficult only because we are trying to get it to do something it doesn't want to do. If East Asian people wanted to get & maintain an Afro, they'd be complaining and have damaged hair as well, because they'd be fighting nature as well.

Wow. That is some food for thought.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

I don't buy that our hair wants to loc.

Based on 6 years of reading stories on this board and others, most naturals do not encounter issues with tangling or knots until they have surpassed the twa-medium fro stage. If hair was meant to loc, it would begin doing so in the early growth stages.

Not to mention that locs are artifically knotted and the locking to maturity process takes place over the course of months-years.

 

[DDTexlaxed]

The sad thing is that God's gifts are never appreciated. We should appreciate the unique nature of of our hair and thank God that He gave us intelligence to be able do whatever we want with it. No other texture on earth can take what we do to our hair. No other hair texture is as versatile and beautiful. Besides, how do we know that other races have an easy time with their hair? Maybe they wish they had our gift. We never think of that.

 

[Kirei]

I don't buy that our hair wants to loc.

Based on 6 years of reading stories on this board and others, most naturals do not encounter issues with tangling or knots until they have surpassed the twa-medium fro stage. If hair was meant to loc, it would begin doing so in the early growth stages.

Not to mention that locs are artifically knotted and the locking to maturity process takes place over the course of months-years.

That was such a simple comment considering ALL hair will loc if you don't comb it.

I just had to at it.
_________________________________________________________________
There is really no "our" hair. Once you figure out YOUR hair, you will be better off. Yes their are many similarities in our hair but, no 2 heads are alike.

No one GAVE me my hair, I got it through genetics and no I don't think "The Creator" gave me the most beautiful hair or black people the most beautiful hair. I really don't think He did a thing to my hair. That's b/c of my genetics.

 

[NaijaNaps]

I'm leaving God out of this but...

What's one of the main reasons we want long hair? Society. We've been socialized to think that the longer our hair, the more beautiful we are. I'd also add that another reason is that longer hair connotes healthier hair. So you may want longer hair because you want healthier hair too. But you can also have healthy short hair.

My natural hair, in it's tightly coiled mass, I don't think, was ever meant to "show" length. It wants to wrap up on itself and stay as close to my head as possible. I think that's what the above poster meant when she said our hair was meant to loc. My hair doesn't want to be straight or hang down - ever. It's me manipulating it to show length and to prevent it from coiling on itself that makes it more difficult to deal with. It's my own fault and I admit it. And I'll still continue to manipulate it. If I just let my hair loc up - like it really want to do - it'd be a breeze. I should add that even loc as we accept them in society need to be manipulated and handled to be nice and neat like we like them

 

[Kirei]

The sad thing is that God's gifts are never appreciated. We should appreciate the unique nature of of our hair and thank God that He gave us intelligence to be able do whatever we want with it. No other texture on earth can take what we do to our hair. No other hair texture is as versatile and beautiful. Besides, how do we know that other races have an easy time with their hair? Maybe they wish they had our gift. We never think of that.

Huh?

Over 65% or was it 84% of women have curly hair. Which can do all of the same styles we do with our hair.

I have a friend who is Mexican and White can relax her hair with *gasp* a black relaxer. It just knocks some of the kink out and makes her hair *gasp* a 3B otherwise she is a 4a. Her mother is white and her father is mexican.