firecracker
Well-Known Member
Why do Black Women want long hair???
- Thread starter sutton989
- Start date
diamond_nh
New Member
Sutton's Statement On a Thread she started about getting stares from people
i'm a black woman with 3b hair. it seem everytime i go out that people are staring at my hair. white women and black women .the stare that they all give me is "how does she get hair hair like that" its like black people can only have one type of hair texture and if there not a 4a or 4b its a weave!!!!!! this used to not bother me, but its starting too! does this happen to anyone eles?
I copied and pasted this from another thread. Sutton989, you were annoyed by these looks that you got from people and the stereotype that all black women can only have one hair texture. Don't you find the stereotype that only white, asian, and hispanic women can have long hair just as annoying and untrue. It is wrong for anyone to assume you have a weave because of your hair texture, but it is equally wrong for anyone to think that all black women with long hair are sporting a weave. To maximize the health and growth of your hair is not to sell out, but instead it is to make most out of what you have and to enjoy the full benefits of what you hair has the full potential to be.
i'm a black woman with 3b hair. it seem everytime i go out that people are staring at my hair. white women and black women .the stare that they all give me is "how does she get hair hair like that" its like black people can only have one type of hair texture and if there not a 4a or 4b its a weave!!!!!! this used to not bother me, but its starting too! does this happen to anyone eles?
I copied and pasted this from another thread. Sutton989, you were annoyed by these looks that you got from people and the stereotype that all black women can only have one hair texture. Don't you find the stereotype that only white, asian, and hispanic women can have long hair just as annoying and untrue. It is wrong for anyone to assume you have a weave because of your hair texture, but it is equally wrong for anyone to think that all black women with long hair are sporting a weave. To maximize the health and growth of your hair is not to sell out, but instead it is to make most out of what you have and to enjoy the full benefits of what you hair has the full potential to be.
adrienne0914
Well-Known Member
latia, you have NO idea how clueless i was. i remember one of my first posts at BHSGO in june 2000 where i said, "i wash, blow dry and curl my hair twice a week, but my hair won't grow. what am i doing wrong?"
i mean i really didn't put 2 and 2 together because my hair "looked" healthy. so naw, unfortunately i was serious!!
actually, my response was to serei's post, but it wasn't actually directed at her. it was more towards the tone the whole thread eventually took. i just hoped people would think back to when they were new...
actually, my response was to serei's post, but it wasn't actually directed at her. it was more towards the tone the whole thread eventually took. i just hoped people would think back to when they were new...
A_Christian
New Member
[ QUOTE ]
Blossom said:
[ QUOTE ]
A_Christian said:
I agree with mly3e in terms of the product use. I think a lot of black women want long hair becasue years of using the wrong products and hair styling methods that broke our hair off had most/many black women thinking we were not able to grow long hair. Now that we've got superior products on the market and are aware of healthy haircare practices (and have become aware that we really are capable of growing our hair to great lengths) we want to grow it as long as it can get. I know I can't speak for everyone but I know many people who feel this way.
[/ QUOTE ]
And I don't think it's so much the products either! I think the real reason black women's hair is short, is because of these silly, scissor happy stylists!
[/ QUOTE ]
I agree with this as well, that's why I will only get my ends "dusted" by one stylist. If it were not for that particular stylist I would trim my ends myself. If ya go to a scissor happy stylist you can expect for your hair to stay the same length forever or even get shorter as time goes by.
Blossom said:
[ QUOTE ]
A_Christian said:
I agree with mly3e in terms of the product use. I think a lot of black women want long hair becasue years of using the wrong products and hair styling methods that broke our hair off had most/many black women thinking we were not able to grow long hair. Now that we've got superior products on the market and are aware of healthy haircare practices (and have become aware that we really are capable of growing our hair to great lengths) we want to grow it as long as it can get. I know I can't speak for everyone but I know many people who feel this way.
[/ QUOTE ]
And I don't think it's so much the products either! I think the real reason black women's hair is short, is because of these silly, scissor happy stylists!
[/ QUOTE ]
I agree with this as well, that's why I will only get my ends "dusted" by one stylist. If it were not for that particular stylist I would trim my ends myself. If ya go to a scissor happy stylist you can expect for your hair to stay the same length forever or even get shorter as time goes by.
pebbles
New Member
[ QUOTE ]
adrienne0914 said:
after some of the responses, i don't think i'd post either. how would you like being called a troll if you just wanted an answer to a question? and who is stirring things up??? her last response to this was about 140 posts ago...
is it THAT hard to think back to the time when you wondered whether you could really grow long hair? is it THAT hard to remember when you thought there was nothing wrong with using a curling iron daily? i had all of these bad habits and preconceived notions until i learned otherwise.
i still remember the thoughts i had when i found my first hair board. i wondered too. i wasn't a troll. it's just that everything on that board was completely foreign to me and every black woman i knew. i'm glad no one called me a troll for asking questions...
[/ QUOTE ]
ITA. I noticed that the originator of this post did log onto the forum this afternoon and apparently has decided not to respond to the thread. I hope the tone of the thread didn't scare her off if she really had a genuine question that she wanted someone to answer for her. I don't want to close this thread without giving her a chance to defend herself, if she wants to.
I understand those who are suspicious of new members that start certain threads. When Serei brought up LongHairDiva, I cringed. That person did take advantage of our hospitality and friendliness and they did cause many of us to have our guard up, fair enough. That was an unqualified disaster!!
However, I honestly believe that we should still give every new member the benefit of the doubt and believe them to be genuine in their desire to join this forum and learn how to care for their hair, until they prove otherwise. I don't think we should penalize the vast majority of newbies because of a misguided few that happen to slip through the cracks.
My first question on this forum was something along the lines of "can I really grow my hair long", or something close to that. I'm happy that the established members took the time to answer my question and assure me that my goals were attainable. They didn't assume I was a troll, thank goodness. Let's continue to extend the same courtesy to all the newbies that join our forum. If they turn out to be trolls, we'll deal with it.
adrienne0914 said:
after some of the responses, i don't think i'd post either. how would you like being called a troll if you just wanted an answer to a question? and who is stirring things up??? her last response to this was about 140 posts ago...
is it THAT hard to think back to the time when you wondered whether you could really grow long hair? is it THAT hard to remember when you thought there was nothing wrong with using a curling iron daily? i had all of these bad habits and preconceived notions until i learned otherwise.
i still remember the thoughts i had when i found my first hair board. i wondered too. i wasn't a troll. it's just that everything on that board was completely foreign to me and every black woman i knew. i'm glad no one called me a troll for asking questions...
[/ QUOTE ]
ITA. I noticed that the originator of this post did log onto the forum this afternoon and apparently has decided not to respond to the thread. I hope the tone of the thread didn't scare her off if she really had a genuine question that she wanted someone to answer for her. I don't want to close this thread without giving her a chance to defend herself, if she wants to.
I understand those who are suspicious of new members that start certain threads. When Serei brought up LongHairDiva, I cringed. That person did take advantage of our hospitality and friendliness and they did cause many of us to have our guard up, fair enough. That was an unqualified disaster!!
However, I honestly believe that we should still give every new member the benefit of the doubt and believe them to be genuine in their desire to join this forum and learn how to care for their hair, until they prove otherwise. I don't think we should penalize the vast majority of newbies because of a misguided few that happen to slip through the cracks.
My first question on this forum was something along the lines of "can I really grow my hair long", or something close to that. I'm happy that the established members took the time to answer my question and assure me that my goals were attainable. They didn't assume I was a troll, thank goodness. Let's continue to extend the same courtesy to all the newbies that join our forum. If they turn out to be trolls, we'll deal with it.
[ QUOTE ]
diamond_nh said:
Sutton's Statement On a Thread she started about getting stares from people
i'm a black woman with 3b hair. it seem everytime i go out that people are staring at my hair. white women and black women .the stare that they all give me is "how does she get hair hair like that" its like black people can only have one type of hair texture and if there not a 4a or 4b its a weave!!!!!! this used to not bother me, but its starting too! does this happen to anyone eles?
I copied and pasted this from another thread. Sutton989, you were annoyed by these looks that you got from people and the stereotype that all black women can only have one hair texture. Don't you find the stereotype that only white, asian, and hispanic women can have long hair just as annoying and untrue. It is wrong for anyone to assume you have a weave because of your hair texture, but it is equally wrong for anyone to think that all black women with long hair are sporting a weave. To maximize the health and growth of your hair is not to sell out, but instead it is to make most out of what you have and to enjoy the full benefits of what you hair has the full potential to be.
[/ QUOTE ]
Great minds think alike..
I also looked at that post...
diamond_nh said:
Sutton's Statement On a Thread she started about getting stares from people
i'm a black woman with 3b hair. it seem everytime i go out that people are staring at my hair. white women and black women .the stare that they all give me is "how does she get hair hair like that" its like black people can only have one type of hair texture and if there not a 4a or 4b its a weave!!!!!! this used to not bother me, but its starting too! does this happen to anyone eles?
I copied and pasted this from another thread. Sutton989, you were annoyed by these looks that you got from people and the stereotype that all black women can only have one hair texture. Don't you find the stereotype that only white, asian, and hispanic women can have long hair just as annoying and untrue. It is wrong for anyone to assume you have a weave because of your hair texture, but it is equally wrong for anyone to think that all black women with long hair are sporting a weave. To maximize the health and growth of your hair is not to sell out, but instead it is to make most out of what you have and to enjoy the full benefits of what you hair has the full potential to be.
[/ QUOTE ]
Great minds think alike..
Laela
Sidestepping the "lynch mob"
[ QUOTE ]
sutton989 said:
I really want to get this out because since i'v been coming to this site for about 3 week this subject has been bothering me. Now before I state how I feel, let me just say that I love this site. It’s good to see so many black women have a bond on one board. My problem is what is the obsession with black women and long hair?? When I first started coming to this site it made me think a lot about why I was coming here. You never see White, Hispanic, or Asian women making a website about having long hair. It kind of made me feel like I was a sell out. Because long hair has long been associated with whiteness. Why can't we be happy with healthy hair? Why does it have to be long?? It kind of bugs me when I see all these post about outrageous combination and different vitamins to take on how to get long hair. It just feels like some kind unconscious self hatred. I don't know if I clearly expressed how i feel. Does anyone else feel this way?
p.s.
this post by no means was meant to offend anyone. I just wanted to voice my feelings.
[/ QUOTE ]
First, welcome to the boards!
I am offended, but this is all amusing to me. There's a black woman who sports long, natural 4b hair, Stephanie Carruthers(sp?). I don't think she wants to be white. All women, black or otherwise, have the right to cut, grow, their hair all they WANT -- WHY they want to runs the gamut from aesthetics to because they can. To encapsulate their desire for long, healthy hair into wanting to be a different race is absurd. I hope you can spend more time on the boards to see really look beyond the "obsession with long hair" that you seemed to have picked up right away.
The longest my hair has ever been is a little past shoulder lenghth and I've never WANTED long hair. I want healthy hair. And before this forum, I couldn't find one where I could learn/share information with other women about making my hair healthier. Naturally, lenghth follows when someone's hair is healthy. This forum is very valuable, I hope you stick around long enough to see that...
sutton989 said:
I really want to get this out because since i'v been coming to this site for about 3 week this subject has been bothering me. Now before I state how I feel, let me just say that I love this site. It’s good to see so many black women have a bond on one board. My problem is what is the obsession with black women and long hair?? When I first started coming to this site it made me think a lot about why I was coming here. You never see White, Hispanic, or Asian women making a website about having long hair. It kind of made me feel like I was a sell out. Because long hair has long been associated with whiteness. Why can't we be happy with healthy hair? Why does it have to be long?? It kind of bugs me when I see all these post about outrageous combination and different vitamins to take on how to get long hair. It just feels like some kind unconscious self hatred. I don't know if I clearly expressed how i feel. Does anyone else feel this way?
p.s.
this post by no means was meant to offend anyone. I just wanted to voice my feelings.
[/ QUOTE ]
First, welcome to the boards!
I am offended, but this is all amusing to me. There's a black woman who sports long, natural 4b hair, Stephanie Carruthers(sp?). I don't think she wants to be white. All women, black or otherwise, have the right to cut, grow, their hair all they WANT -- WHY they want to runs the gamut from aesthetics to because they can. To encapsulate their desire for long, healthy hair into wanting to be a different race is absurd. I hope you can spend more time on the boards to see really look beyond the "obsession with long hair" that you seemed to have picked up right away.
The longest my hair has ever been is a little past shoulder lenghth and I've never WANTED long hair. I want healthy hair. And before this forum, I couldn't find one where I could learn/share information with other women about making my hair healthier. Naturally, lenghth follows when someone's hair is healthy. This forum is very valuable, I hope you stick around long enough to see that...
FineChyna
Member
[ QUOTE ]
sutton989 said:
I really want to get this out because since i'v been coming to this site for about 3 week this subject has been bothering me. Now before I state how I feel, let me just say that I love this site. It’s good to see so many black women have a bond on one board. My problem is what is the obsession with black women and long hair?? When I first started coming to this site it made me think a lot about why I was coming here. You never see White, Hispanic, or Asian women making a website about having long hair. It kind of made me feel like I was a sell out. Because long hair has long been associated with whiteness. Why can't we be happy with healthy hair? Why does it have to be long?? It kind of bugs me when I see all these post about outrageous combination and different vitamins to take on how to get long hair. It just feels like some kind unconscious self hatred. I don't know if I clearly expressed how i feel. Does anyone else feel this way?
p.s.
this post by no means was meant to offend anyone. I just wanted to voice my feelings.
[/ QUOTE ]
to answer your question having healthy hair is my number one goal and i would like some length cause first i don't look good with short hair cause of my facial shape and secondly i came to realization that my hair was on the short side (around shoulder length) because i was messing it up using the wrong products and wrong techniques
i also think some people on here might want long hair to prove to themselves and others that black women can have healthy AND long hair minus the weaves.
sutton989 said:
I really want to get this out because since i'v been coming to this site for about 3 week this subject has been bothering me. Now before I state how I feel, let me just say that I love this site. It’s good to see so many black women have a bond on one board. My problem is what is the obsession with black women and long hair?? When I first started coming to this site it made me think a lot about why I was coming here. You never see White, Hispanic, or Asian women making a website about having long hair. It kind of made me feel like I was a sell out. Because long hair has long been associated with whiteness. Why can't we be happy with healthy hair? Why does it have to be long?? It kind of bugs me when I see all these post about outrageous combination and different vitamins to take on how to get long hair. It just feels like some kind unconscious self hatred. I don't know if I clearly expressed how i feel. Does anyone else feel this way?
p.s.
this post by no means was meant to offend anyone. I just wanted to voice my feelings.
[/ QUOTE ]
to answer your question having healthy hair is my number one goal and i would like some length cause first i don't look good with short hair cause of my facial shape and secondly i came to realization that my hair was on the short side (around shoulder length) because i was messing it up using the wrong products and wrong techniques
i also think some people on here might want long hair to prove to themselves and others that black women can have healthy AND long hair minus the weaves.
[ QUOTE ]
sutton989 said:
Why can't we be happy with healthy hair? Why does it have to be long?? It kind of bugs me when I see all these post about outrageous combination and different vitamins to take on how to get long hair. It just feels like some kind unconscious self hatred. I don't know if I clearly expressed how i feel. Does anyone else feel this way?
p.s.
this post by no means was meant to offend anyone. I just wanted to voice my feelings.
[/ QUOTE ]
Welcome to the club! And This started the board off with a bang!
As you can tell, I'm not offended.
I just wanted to comment on the [ QUOTE ]
Why can't we be happy with healthy hair? Why does it have to be long??
[/ QUOTE ] part of your question.
Actually, you CAN'T have healthy hair WITHOUT it being long. What I mean is, once your hair gets healthy, and you have the breakage under control, and you only get trims just to get whatever splits you may have, you hair will BE longer because you know how to retain length. The only way you can have short HEALTHY hair is if you decide to keep it cut into a style. Then that's not being happy with what you have technically either. But I know what you meant.
Anyway, I've bumped the the threads that asked this question before, and I'm sure my answer is on there somewhere to, lol!
HTH
sutton989 said:
Why can't we be happy with healthy hair? Why does it have to be long?? It kind of bugs me when I see all these post about outrageous combination and different vitamins to take on how to get long hair. It just feels like some kind unconscious self hatred. I don't know if I clearly expressed how i feel. Does anyone else feel this way?
p.s.
this post by no means was meant to offend anyone. I just wanted to voice my feelings.
[/ QUOTE ]
Welcome to the club! And This started the board off with a bang!
I just wanted to comment on the [ QUOTE ]
Why can't we be happy with healthy hair? Why does it have to be long??
[/ QUOTE ] part of your question.
Actually, you CAN'T have healthy hair WITHOUT it being long. What I mean is, once your hair gets healthy, and you have the breakage under control, and you only get trims just to get whatever splits you may have, you hair will BE longer because you know how to retain length. The only way you can have short HEALTHY hair is if you decide to keep it cut into a style. Then that's not being happy with what you have technically either. But I know what you meant.
Anyway, I've bumped the the threads that asked this question before, and I'm sure my answer is on there somewhere to, lol!
HTH
cybra
New Member
To be honest, I feel a little sick/sorry for Sutton. I agree with the person who attributed many of the responses to "LHCF withdrawal" that recently occurred
If Sutton had posted her question prior to the "great crash of 2003," she may not have met such...um..."emotional reactions." However, since most of us had to go visit strange territory (for me RHC), and to finally be back home (LHCF), the last thing we wanted to deal with was someone (outsider) questioning our "housekeeping" motives. Her timing was just a bit off. I guess, like most, I feel she came to my house (LHCF) so it was important for her not to disrespect the residents. I think to apply "race" to hair length was a big no no on her part.
I must say, if she didn't get the answer she was seeking, she might want to start at the begining of the thread and reread to 8+ because I know there are so many excellent answers in there.
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this thread and all my LHCF sistas did represent well
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this thread and all my LHCF sistas did represent well
silvergirl
Well-Known Member
Why do Black Women want long hair???
God made my hair to grow long.
God made my hair to grow long.
diamond_nh
New Member
[ QUOTE ]
lilchanel said:
[ QUOTE ]
diamond_nh said:
Sutton's Statement On a Thread she started about getting stares from people
i'm a black woman with 3b hair. it seem everytime i go out that people are staring at my hair. white women and black women .the stare that they all give me is "how does she get hair hair like that" its like black people can only have one type of hair texture and if there not a 4a or 4b its a weave!!!!!! this used to not bother me, but its starting too! does this happen to anyone eles?
I copied and pasted this from another thread. Sutton989, you were annoyed by these looks that you got from people and the stereotype that all black women can only have one hair texture. Don't you find the stereotype that only white, asian, and hispanic women can have long hair just as annoying and untrue. It is wrong for anyone to assume you have a weave because of your hair texture, but it is equally wrong for anyone to think that all black women with long hair are sporting a weave. To maximize the health and growth of your hair is not to sell out, but instead it is to make most out of what you have and to enjoy the full benefits of what you hair has the full potential to be.
[/ QUOTE ]
Great minds think alike..
I also looked at that post...
[/ QUOTE ]
LOL I had to read all of her posts.
lilchanel said:
[ QUOTE ]
diamond_nh said:
Sutton's Statement On a Thread she started about getting stares from people
i'm a black woman with 3b hair. it seem everytime i go out that people are staring at my hair. white women and black women .the stare that they all give me is "how does she get hair hair like that" its like black people can only have one type of hair texture and if there not a 4a or 4b its a weave!!!!!! this used to not bother me, but its starting too! does this happen to anyone eles?
I copied and pasted this from another thread. Sutton989, you were annoyed by these looks that you got from people and the stereotype that all black women can only have one hair texture. Don't you find the stereotype that only white, asian, and hispanic women can have long hair just as annoying and untrue. It is wrong for anyone to assume you have a weave because of your hair texture, but it is equally wrong for anyone to think that all black women with long hair are sporting a weave. To maximize the health and growth of your hair is not to sell out, but instead it is to make most out of what you have and to enjoy the full benefits of what you hair has the full potential to be.
[/ QUOTE ]
Great minds think alike..
[/ QUOTE ]
LOL I had to read all of her posts.
[ QUOTE ]
diamond_nh said:
[ QUOTE ]
lilchanel said:
[ QUOTE ]
diamond_nh said:
Sutton's Statement On a Thread she started about getting stares from people
i'm a black woman with 3b hair. it seem everytime i go out that people are staring at my hair. white women and black women .the stare that they all give me is "how does she get hair hair like that" its like black people can only have one type of hair texture and if there not a 4a or 4b its a weave!!!!!! this used to not bother me, but its starting too! does this happen to anyone eles?
I copied and pasted this from another thread. Sutton989, you were annoyed by these looks that you got from people and the stereotype that all black women can only have one hair texture. Don't you find the stereotype that only white, asian, and hispanic women can have long hair just as annoying and untrue. It is wrong for anyone to assume you have a weave because of your hair texture, but it is equally wrong for anyone to think that all black women with long hair are sporting a weave. To maximize the health and growth of your hair is not to sell out, but instead it is to make most out of what you have and to enjoy the full benefits of what you hair has the full potential to be.
[/ QUOTE ]
Great minds think alike..
I also looked at that post...
[/ QUOTE ]
LOL I had to read all of her posts.
[/ QUOTE ]
diamond_nh said:
[ QUOTE ]
lilchanel said:
[ QUOTE ]
diamond_nh said:
Sutton's Statement On a Thread she started about getting stares from people
i'm a black woman with 3b hair. it seem everytime i go out that people are staring at my hair. white women and black women .the stare that they all give me is "how does she get hair hair like that" its like black people can only have one type of hair texture and if there not a 4a or 4b its a weave!!!!!! this used to not bother me, but its starting too! does this happen to anyone eles?
I copied and pasted this from another thread. Sutton989, you were annoyed by these looks that you got from people and the stereotype that all black women can only have one hair texture. Don't you find the stereotype that only white, asian, and hispanic women can have long hair just as annoying and untrue. It is wrong for anyone to assume you have a weave because of your hair texture, but it is equally wrong for anyone to think that all black women with long hair are sporting a weave. To maximize the health and growth of your hair is not to sell out, but instead it is to make most out of what you have and to enjoy the full benefits of what you hair has the full potential to be.
[/ QUOTE ]
Great minds think alike..
[/ QUOTE ]
LOL I had to read all of her posts.
[/ QUOTE ]
diamond_nh
New Member
[ QUOTE ]
soulchild said:
[ QUOTE ]
cybra said:
the "great crash of 2003,"
[/ QUOTE ]
[/ QUOTE ]
Just as bad as the black out
soulchild said:
[ QUOTE ]
cybra said:
the "great crash of 2003,"
[/ QUOTE ]
[/ QUOTE ]
LONDONCHICK
New Member
Long hair is not an issue of race, it is a issue of femininity. I want loooong healthy hair, i want my hair to be as long as it possibly can be. This is not because I want to be a white lady, it is because I personally feel that long hair looks feminine.
What about women who are not rastafarian but have long (dread)locks, are they selling out?
By the way, newbie here!
What about women who are not rastafarian but have long (dread)locks, are they selling out?
By the way, newbie here!
dontspeakdefeat
Hair Coach
Welcome LondonChick!
CaramelKiss
New Member
Wow! I can't believe how many pages this topic has generated & how much time has been spent attacking her. She only wrote 2 posts!!! She was clearly being honest about her feelings and she also apologized in advanced for offending anyone if her views weren't articulated clearly. That clearly takes guts. It really scares me how quick people are to jump on other members. If she were a troll, the best thing to have done was to simply ignore the post, not adding fuel to the fire which in turn gives trolls exactly what they are looking for- Attention.
Since when has confusion been a crime? That's why we all came here in the first place. I know many women and so do u who have this same mindset about hair and identity. We discuss it all the time. Sure it angers us at times, but that doesn't make them any less of a person than we are because we may or may not know better than them.
And the other thing is, we don't know where our members our coming from. Their knowledge, their age, their culture. I'm just saying we need to show a little bit more sensitivity and understanding and be a bit more open minded before jumping on our members. We are here to educate as well as learn from one another!!
Since when has confusion been a crime? That's why we all came here in the first place. I know many women and so do u who have this same mindset about hair and identity. We discuss it all the time. Sure it angers us at times, but that doesn't make them any less of a person than we are because we may or may not know better than them.
And the other thing is, we don't know where our members our coming from. Their knowledge, their age, their culture. I'm just saying we need to show a little bit more sensitivity and understanding and be a bit more open minded before jumping on our members. We are here to educate as well as learn from one another!!
northernbelle
New Member
Hi, Everybody!
I think that posts such as the one Sutton posted are honest, and keep Forum members on the QT.
For my part, coming to the LHCF was a real blessing. Not only did I locate a community of real on-line friends, I also have become empowered re: the care and maintenance of my hair.
While having longer, shoulder length hair is my ultimate goal, I am happy being able to wear my short hair in whatever style I choose, whether in an up-do, or in my cute, new hairstyle, courtesy of the JCPenney stylist I found per rommendations from the LHCF. My hair is healthier than it has been in a very long time, as a result of changes I have made, courtesy of the LHCF.
In addition to my quest for healthier hair, I also strive to mantain a healthy lifestyle via weight management,and stress reduduction.
So, Sutton, thank you for keeping the spirited conversation going, and thank you for your comments.
northernbelle
I think that posts such as the one Sutton posted are honest, and keep Forum members on the QT.
For my part, coming to the LHCF was a real blessing. Not only did I locate a community of real on-line friends, I also have become empowered re: the care and maintenance of my hair.
While having longer, shoulder length hair is my ultimate goal, I am happy being able to wear my short hair in whatever style I choose, whether in an up-do, or in my cute, new hairstyle, courtesy of the JCPenney stylist I found per rommendations from the LHCF. My hair is healthier than it has been in a very long time, as a result of changes I have made, courtesy of the LHCF.
In addition to my quest for healthier hair, I also strive to mantain a healthy lifestyle via weight management,and stress reduduction.
So, Sutton, thank you for keeping the spirited conversation going, and thank you for your comments.
northernbelle
ChasingBliss
Well-Known Member
[ QUOTE ]
CaramelKiss said:
Wow! I can't believe how many pages this topic has generated & how much time has been spent attacking her. She only wrote 2 posts!!! She was clearly being honest about her feelings and she also apologized in advanced for offending anyone if her views weren't articulated clearly. That clearly takes guts. It really scares me how quick people are to jump on other members. If she were a troll, the best thing to have done was to simply ignore the post, not adding fuel to the fire which in turn gives trolls exactly what they are looking for- Attention.
Since when has confusion been a crime? That's why we all came here in the first place. I know many women and so do u who have this same mindset about hair and identity. We discuss it all the time. Sure it angers us at times, but that doesn't make them any less of a person than we are because we may or may not know better than them.
And the other thing is, we don't know where our members our coming from. Their knowledge, their age, their culture. I'm just saying we need to show a little bit more sensitivity and understanding and be a bit more open minded before jumping on our members. We are here to educate as well as learn from one another!!
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Another great post!!! especially the point about how she did apologize in advance and still, IMO got ripped to shreds... quite scarey.
CaramelKiss said:
Wow! I can't believe how many pages this topic has generated & how much time has been spent attacking her. She only wrote 2 posts!!! She was clearly being honest about her feelings and she also apologized in advanced for offending anyone if her views weren't articulated clearly. That clearly takes guts. It really scares me how quick people are to jump on other members. If she were a troll, the best thing to have done was to simply ignore the post, not adding fuel to the fire which in turn gives trolls exactly what they are looking for- Attention.
Since when has confusion been a crime? That's why we all came here in the first place. I know many women and so do u who have this same mindset about hair and identity. We discuss it all the time. Sure it angers us at times, but that doesn't make them any less of a person than we are because we may or may not know better than them.
And the other thing is, we don't know where our members our coming from. Their knowledge, their age, their culture. I'm just saying we need to show a little bit more sensitivity and understanding and be a bit more open minded before jumping on our members. We are here to educate as well as learn from one another!!
[/ QUOTE ]
Another great post!!! especially the point about how she did apologize in advance and still, IMO got ripped to shreds... quite scarey.
cutebajangirl
New Member
Wait a minute, you know what I don't understand how she is being ripped apart. I posted in this thread and I wasn't offended at all. My point (and it seemed to be the point of many other posters as well) was to get her to see how sterotypes are hindering her ability to be open minded regardinbg hair length and black women. Now I don't know what was delelted but aside from being called a potential troller ( and even that had a logic behind it) I don't think the vast majority of the replies came across as meanspirited but instead a call to critical thought about the major issue of hair as it pertains to blacks. To move beyond the concept (not implying that is what Sutton thinks) which includes but is not limited to: blacks relax to look white, long hair is a purely white female domain and therefore blacks who want long hair want to be white and that blacks are not capable of growing long hair therefore those of us who want, are somehow negating our blackness.
ChasingBliss
Well-Known Member
Point well taken Cutebajangirl. Iniially, this was the vibe that I got in this thread, but I am aware of all the posts that tried to respectfully enlighten. I shouldnt have left that part out.
cutebajangirl
New Member
Please don't feel that my response was directed towards you
, because it wasn't.
Many posters stated that they felt she was being attacked. I see it as more of a debate, and discussion is always good.
ChasingBliss
Well-Known Member
Oh, I understand sweetie... hopefully, if she's reading these responses, she'll take the good from them.
diamond_nh
New Member
I agree!!! I don't see how she is being attack. She is being told why we think her views are wrong. I also don't know what was deleted. As far as her being called a troll, all she had to do was deny it or ignore it. I think if she had given a reply pages ago it wouldn't have gotten to that level. People are entitled to their opinions just like she is to hers.
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