Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come About?

Discussion in 'Christian Fellowship' started by Shimmie, Dec 5, 2008.

  1. Aggie

    Aggie Well-Known Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    WOW!!! Thank you melodies815 for this post. I definitely can learn something from this whole thread. I am not married yet, however, I am in a new relationship with a man who truly loves the Lord. I have not been in a serious relationship for a few years now and I need to learn again as much as I can about this wonderful gift called "submission" to a man.

    Shimmie, thank you, thank you, thank you for starting this thread. This is one subscribed thread I am keeping:yep:.
     
  2. melodies815

    melodies815 New Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    Yes, Aggie...this thread is the bomb. I cannot believe it took me so long to get here and kind of make it a part of what I do when I come to LHCF. *spanking myself* I think my biggest issue is that I come here in spurts...in for a couple of months and out for a couple. I feel like I Lose much when I am gone...

    ..but I have found a home.

    Shimmie, I am so glad you started this thread. It is wonderful!!! I love your prayer too.

    Blessings,
    Christi
     
  3. Shimmie

    Shimmie "God is the Only Truth -- Period" Staff Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    Melodie...... Beautiful wife of 'Dexter' :love2: It's wonderful to 'hear' from you. :yep:

    Thank you so much for coming in here to share this beautiful testimony. It gives me much peace and joy. And 'no', it is not too long; it is what God intended for you to share.

    Coming from a woman of God such as yourself and with your awesome responsibilities as wife, mother, and vessel of the Lord, I cannot take for granted all of which you have shared from your heart.

    I am also honored that you 'thought' of me. Wow.... thank you so much.

    Every word in your post touches my heart, especially this...

    * Praying over him, his mind, his emotions, every single day in his hearing...

    Melodie, the key words are 'in his hearing'... for faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God. Our husbands need to 'hear' what we pray as much as to hear 'that' we pray for them. It feeds life into his spirit as he goes about his day and out into the fields of battle that await him to be conquered.

    For each day that shines upon him, is also a day where he must prove himself to be 'the man'. The man who can care for me, for our 'family' and for himself as well. The man who can counter the pitfalls and the snares of the fowler, bearing his armour against all odds, and yield to victory; Victory which at times feel as distant as from the east is to the west.

    The man who yet still tries to overcome all odds and yet come unto his wife and be tender, yet strong, to love and be loved in all of his strengths and all of his weaknesses; to have someone who yet says, "I Believe in You"... no matter what you do or not do, "I Believe in You', all the days of our life, as One.

    This is what I am coming to see as 'submit'... to 'Believe in Him' and to Trust Him in his most taxing task of his life. His call to be a man, to be husband 'all' to me as his wife. I submit to 'Believe' in him, in everyway, but 'none.'

    No other woman has the gift and the priviledge to do thus and such, as the one he has chosen to be his wife.

    I'm learning...from the Holy Spirit by way of each of you and the beautiful women who have shared in this thread. I am learning. For God has awakened my soul to yield to His control and not mine.

    For what did Jesus do? He submitted to the will of God our Father and He won. From His sole act of obedience, we all did. :heart2:
     
  4. Shimmie

    Shimmie "God is the Only Truth -- Period" Staff Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    Hi Aggie, :kiss: God bless you and I 'thank' YOU. :yep:

    You and each of the ladies here have truly made this a beautiful thread. I so appreciate each of you from the bottom of my heart. I'm learning a lot and I will treasure each word as a gift from Heaven. :giveheart:
     
  5. melodies815

    melodies815 New Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    Update: Being that we are here in Britain for his current tour of duty, it's really hard for us to find a good church. I won't list all the issues because they are irrelevant. It's just that we are in the countryside...and church with good Word is not anywhere nearby that we have been able to find.

    So....we did our New Year's study at home and fellowshipped together. Come to find out that hubby is very clear on the areas of submission where I need some work. :wallbash:

    The Lord has been dealing with me about pride and how I think my way of doing things is the best...and if I do something he told me to do...well...I am the bomb. :wallbash: :wallbash::wallbash: It's horrible because my intentions are good, but I ALWAYS FALL SHORT!!!!

    So...this is what he said: You cook and clean and encourage and challenge me to be Godly...and you are soft-toned and all of that. I would not want any other wife in this world....but when I ask you to pick up stuff around your office, you always give me a REASON why it's there and also tell me what I didn't do as well...like I need to be reminded of what I did not do. When I tell you something is bothering me, I just want you to go get it straight. No explanations. No excuses...know what I mean?"

    I can't even begin to tell you how devastated I was. I started to tell him that the reason why I do that is because I want to point out how hypocritical of him it is to tell me to do something when he has not done it...but before I could open my mouth, I got convicted. I was about to do it again...

    Instead, I said, "Okay. I have to work on that. I'm sorry honey."

    Later, in the bathroom....:whyme::cry3::cry3::drowning::dazed::cry::whyme:Yes...all of that! lol

    Ya'll, pray for me, as I will pray for all of us. This submission thing...God is funny to me; He knows EXACTLY what it takes to get us to submit and to grow.

    Back to the drawing board....:wallbash:

    The Lord's love to us all, and Happy New Year, everyone!!!

    cj
     
  6. ladyofvirtue

    ladyofvirtue Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    ^^^My DH loves to quote to me how it is indeed Biblical for me to submit to him too. When he reminds me of this, he almost sounds like an opera star, singing with the voice of an angel!"

    Yes, it's true. I am to submit to him. But, the husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the church, as Christ loved the church, as Christ loved the church. (note the repetition).

    It just keeps reminding us that WE BOTH need help from The Lord to help us be the husband and wife that is pleasing to Him.

    So, DH will read to me what the Bible says a husband is to be. And I read to him what the Bible says a wife is to be.

    It has really made a difference!
     
    Last edited: Jan 3, 2009
  7. Shimmie

    Shimmie "God is the Only Truth -- Period" Staff Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    Melodie and Lady of Virtue....

    Thank you both so much :kiss: The two of you just don't know how much your posts have ministered to me. In both of your posts, you have 'echoed' what has been in my heart for a long time.

    *sigh*............

    What you have shared shows me that I will encounter that 'struggle' with him. It's a struggle that I've feared. The struggle of his inmperfections vs his expectations of my submission to him as he is.

    Both of you know that I am a fire ball; you've seen my posts on this forum.... :yep: :rolleyes: And I KNOW I'm going to want to 'fire' back at him...I know this.

    God is preparing me. And I thank Him so much for what you've done to help in His preparation.

    My heart and love to both of you....In Prayer, we 'Rock and Rule'... :yep:
     
  8. NappturalWomyn

    NappturalWomyn New Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    I am a single woman, and I think it was meant for me to read this thread. I decided to subscribe to this thread, because all the great information here I can use in my future married life (and it is in my future). I was guilty of coming off to men wrong in relationships for years. I don't want to do that anymore, and I pray for the temperance therein.

    I believe that people have misinterpreted the word 'submit' for some time, and that is where the strife comes from. When it is my turn to be concerned of things with my husband, I understand that he is the head of the house, and I am fine with that. I am ready for that.

    I can be a complete, independent woman in a sense and still allow my husband to be at the head. 'Submit' does not have to mean bow down.
     
  9. Loves Harmony

    Loves Harmony Well-Known Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    This is some wonderful info...
     
  10. Shimmie

    Shimmie "God is the Only Truth -- Period" Staff Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    This is beautifully shared and it really blesses me. Thank you. :giveheart:

    It reminds me, I have a wardrobe full of beautiful skirts and dresses that I will need to start wearing, and let him wear the pants in our family. :yep: :lol:
     
  11. SvelteVelvet

    SvelteVelvet Well-Known Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    Love this thread! Bump!
     
  12. Shimmie

    Shimmie "God is the Only Truth -- Period" Staff Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    :bump: :bump: :bump:

    Bumping for Saved06 :Rose:

    The beautiful wives in our forum shared some truly wonderful support and I am so thankful for each and everyone of them.

    I pray God's blessings upon all of them and their wonderful husbands, forever love, peace and joy for them, always 'One.'

    :rosebud: :love2: :rosebud:
     
  13. Ladybelle

    Ladybelle New Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    The ladies have thus far shared some really beautiful, helpful, and insightful answers to the question posed and I felt compelled to share mine.

    I've stated this before somewhat on another thread, but I really took the time to think about the answer I'm about to give.

    It took me some time (first year of marriage) to completely submit to dh. I had to pray about it, pray about it some more and I even fasted about it. Here is the conclusion I have come to

    1) - unwillingness to submit to DH completely lined up with an unwillingness to submit to God. It's also evidence of some type of fear. I was afraid to completely submit to DH- the what if's bombarded my mind. What if he takes all of our money and loses it? what if i have to leave in the middle of the night? what if he doesn't know how to lead? I thought that nobody could completely take care of me, the way I took care of me. I had to get to the place where I handed it all over to God--I handed My husband and my marriage over to GOd and said Lord, I surrender all. Let your will be done. And I know when God tells me that he will never see the righteous forsaken or beg for bread, he is not a man the he can lie. I know that no matter what my husband does, God has it all under control and because I submit to God by submitting to my husband, God protects me and us. What's so great about it, is that my husband does take better care of me than I did.:yawn: I know that's because it's not just my husband taking care of me, it's God. The change in my marriage has been profound.

    2) It takes just as much strength to submit as it does to lead. God calls us all to be servants in some form or fashion & in marriage the order of things is clear - the husband is to serve the wife by providing,protecting & cherishing her, the wife is to serve the husband by submitting to him & respecting him, they are to serve each other by submitting themselves to one another in everything. They need each other and one is no greater than the other, the head is useless without a neck. As a helpmate to dh, i understand just how important I am, his ability to see clearly is partially dependent on my ability to submit to his vision.

    3)First and foremost, I submit to God. I know others have said this, but i think this is such a vital component that it is worth repeating. I pray for my husband and marriage often. I also take a lot of my worries/concerns to God without ever mentioning a word to dh and God always, always works it out. I mean from the simple things to my husband being consistent in helping me out around the house, to his ability to provide and how to deal with dh effectively when he is in one of his moods.

    4) eta: choose a man who is also submitted to God. It will save one a whole lot of heartache and unneccessary strife, confusion and such.

    :nicethread: Thanks for starting this, it was truly a nice thread!
     
    Last edited: Jul 19, 2009
  14. CandiceC

    CandiceC .

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    Thanks for this. Yes. Unwillingness to submit can stem from fear. I know about those What ifs?

    For example DH said today he wanted to do something with the landscape lighting this week, although I'm concerned with the way we have it set up currently. I'd like for an electrician to check it out first. I just got done praying and included in that was for the Lord to protect our home. I will suggest getting an electrician and leave it up to God to cover the situation.
     
  15. aa9746

    aa9746 New Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    Very insightful and good conclusions.
     
  16. Ladybelle

    Ladybelle New Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    That's pretty much all you can do, pray about it - make any suggestions/comments you need to in love & then leave it to God to cover the situation. The same thing holds true with everything else. I'm so glad I finally realized that!
     
  17. Laela

    Laela In Mela Nation, eating popcorn

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    Bumping for Bess....
     
  18. Laela

    Laela In Mela Nation, eating popcorn

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    I'm going through this wonderful thread...and I agree with you on this. :yep: This Scripture shows the parallel between Marriage and God's covenant with His people.

    (Ephesians 5:21-26)

    Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

    Wives, submit to your husbands as if to the Lord. For a husband is "head" of the wife as Christ is "head" of the church.
    He is saviour of the "body." Like the church submits to Christ, wives should submit to their husbands, in everything.

    Husbands, love your wives like Christ loved the church.

    He gave himself for her to make her holy, cleansing her by washing her with water and the word



     
  19. CinnaMocha

    CinnaMocha New Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    I needed to come across this thread...And Shimmie whenever you return, just know that your words meant a lot to me, and lots of clarity came just when I thought it wouldn't. Thanks...
     
  20. sithembile

    sithembile Well-Known Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    I just wanted to share that this thread has been a rebuke for me, and I thank God for your testimonies. I realise that I've become more argumentative and dismissive of my husband and, many times, my inability to submit comes from pride and fear and ultimately, it means that I am not trusting God, which is a serious issue.

    I realise that I need to repent, and take my marriage before God in prayer daily. I know what the issues are which are causing me to be proud and also fearful, but we've not been able to resolve them on our own. The only thing I can do is bring them before the Lord daily so that I am able to truly submit (in heart and in deed) to my husband and therefore to the Lord.
     
  21. Ladybelle

    Ladybelle New Member

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    Re: Wives Who Submit to Their Husbands: What Do You Submit to and How Does it Come Ab

    ((hugs)) The conclusions you have come to is what will bring about the change in your marriage. In fact, it won't be long now. God will bless your obedience to HIM. Psalm 68:6 says that God sets the solitary in families, he brings out those who are bound -which pretty much means one person in the family/marriage can be the one who will turn things around. That person is you! Blessings on your resolve to be a better wife and I pray all goes well for you.
     
  22. delitefulmane

    delitefulmane Well-Known Member

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    Bump!! :bump: :bump:

    I am really struggling in this area. It seems that just like someone said up thread, my issue may be coming from me not allowing myself to fully trust God!

    I'd like to hear more testimonies if any ladies are willing to share!
     
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  23. Shimmie

    Shimmie "God is the Only Truth -- Period" Staff Member

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    I forgot that I was the one who started this thread. :lol:

    What's da' matter Angel? You are still a newly wed...still on your honeymoon. Hubby won't submit? Well, he gon' learn today. :look: :lol:

    Just kidding.... :love2:
     
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  24. delitefulmane

    delitefulmane Well-Known Member

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    :lol: :lol: @Shimmie I don't know if we are still in the "honeymoon" phase because I feel like REAL just got real when I had our daughter. :lol:
    I don't know if it is me and my unwillingness to submit or my husband that needs a change. I remember in the movie War Room, Ms.Clara told Elizabeth that she needed to work on herself and let God work on her husband.

    I think this may be the case for me.
     
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  25. Farida

    Farida Well-Known Member

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    Everyone loves to talk about women submitting but not how the same chapter says for men to love their wives as Christ loved the church which is a TALL order.

    If a man expects submission he needs to be ready to make his wife his alpha and omega; to die for her. To always do what is best for her tbat will honor and develop her. What woman would resist a man like that?
     

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