Women who wear weaves or braids don't have much hair.

[plove]

My SO thinks that women who wear weaves don't have that much hair.
So I asked him what is the difference between wearing braids or a weave.

SO: women who wear braids are not trying to make it seem like it's
their however women who wear weaves are trying to make it seem like it's there real hair.

ME: but some women wear weaves that are shorter then their real hair just for a new look.

SO: if you look at some women walking down the street you will see a lot of women with home made weaves that are jacked up.
If they want to rock a weave at the very lease they can get it done right.

ME: But braids are fake and i wear them all the time so what would be the difference if I get a weave.

SO: you have hair you don't need a weave and a lot of women who wear braids only wear it as a hair style.

ME: so do a lot of women who wears weaves

So: ya but women who wear braids take it out in a few weeks, women who wear weaves ALWAYS wear weaves every time you see them they are rocking
a weave.

ME: ya ya ya but I'm still getting one.

SO; I like your braids leave them in.

So what do you all think about people thinking because you weave you don't have hair
I also know that people also think that when you wear braid but who get it more.
I have never had a weave so i can't speak on that.

 

[dontspeakdefeat]

When I take my hair out of my weaves people always ask, "Why do you wear weaves when your hair is long already?" People just don't get it. I do it because a. I don't want to do my own hair and put all that heat on it b. I use weaves as a protective style. They will help me get to were I want to be and control my scissor happy hand. Out of site is out of mind.

Any ways. I think it is our mentality. AA's think that the only way we can get long hair is to weave it up and there are still a lot of women that don't know the first thing about retaining length, therefore they have shorter hair and use weaves as a way to have instant long hair. When you ask them though they will swear up and down it is all theirs even though you know its a weave.

 

[seeminglysweet]

I think your SO may not have been COMPLETELY off track. Yes there are women who wear weaves for styling purposes, protective styles or a change of scenery.
But there are also those women who get weaves put into without the knowledge or know-how and they end up loosing hair or damaging their hair causing them to wear weaves to create the illusion of having long hair.
my question is "what came first" I know a lot of people who maintained a weave incorrectly that was originally put in for a styling option and they ended up with hair loss and now they have to wear a weave in order to cover bald spots and breakage.
Overall if you want a weave then I think you should get one. He doesnt want yours to look "jacked up" so he is just looking out for you but once he sees you he'll love it.

 

[Braided~Beauty]

So what do you all think about people thinking because you weave you don't have hair
I also know that people also think that when you wear braid but who get it more.
I have never had a weave so i can't speak on that.

I really don't care what people think of my hair.

I have worn my hair braided for so long that pretty much everyone has stopped asking about my hair by now . But I *think* they all know I have hair ! I have never gotten negative comments from anyone though.

 

[Catina72]

I just wanted to chime in that my DH thinks very similar to your SO! I have worn braids many times and he has no problem with it but if I mention weaving my hair(Like his beloved Beyonce ) he is like "Heck naw, I won't be seen in public with you wearing weave" I'm like . So anywayz, that's just my 2cents.

 

[MizAvalon]

I wore braids and then weaves for close to 5 years. Braids while I was transistioning and then weaves when I wanted straight without having to perm. I had plenty of hair. I eventually stopped wearing weaves because my natural hair was growing so much that it became too bulky to hide under the weave, it just became a little too obvious that "something" was under there.

I agree with the previous poster who said that your boyfriend isn't too far off the mark though. It's true that a LOT(not all) of women who wear weaves and braids don't have much hair. Some women don't have much hair so they wear the fake hair so they can look like they do. Some women have plenty of their own hair and wear fake hair because they just don't want to be bothered. Some women wear fake hair just for fun and as a change of pace. None of it is right or wrong, it just IS.

From the conversation you described though sounds like your boyfriend, like most men, just doesn't like fake hair and doesn't want you having it. Men *tolerate* fake hair, they don't like it.

 

[Nice & Wavy]

I really don't care what people think of my hair.

I have worn my hair braided for so long that pretty much everyone has stopped asking about my hair by now . But I *think* they all know I have hair ! I have never gotten negative comments from anyone though.

Not to get off the subject but, braided that little baby is sooooooo adorable!

 

[breezy]

My husband is like this also. I'll get braids and that's cool...but as soon as I want a phony pony or a sewn in weave to give my hair a break he gets mad. He told me weaves are for people who don't have hair. We actually got into a huge argument a while ago. I was gonna get a sew in and he got mad and said I might as well cut all my hair off if I was gonna wear a weave.

Sometimes men don't get it!

 

[dynamic1]

One of my guy friends has a similar view point. I mentioned getting a weave to try out a different hair cut and color. And because I wanted a straight style without wrestling with my hair. He said, "why would you get a weave if you have all that hair already". I tried to explain it, but he did not get it. However, he believes most men do not care, as long as it looks nice.

 

[princcessnadia]

As someone who has worn weaves for 13 years straight I say who cares what people think, If you want to rock a weave as long as it is done right and you don't leave it in forever then God bless. For me it was an accessory that got out of hand my husband could care less, and if people asked if it was my hair I was honest about it. Now that I am letting my natural hair grow back from weaving mistakes, my husband likes my short hair alot better and so do my children. If you feel comfortable with a weave in your hair then rock it and rock it well, who cares what others think as long as you are comfortable with it that is all that really matters.

 

[FAMUDva]

So: ya but women who wear braids take it out in a few weeks, women who wear weaves ALWAYS wear weaves every time you see them they are rocking
a weave.

My SO said the same exact thing this weekend!

 

[glamazon386]

Weaves do get backlash whereas braids don't. While your SO's opinion is true for many people, you are also right in saying that it's just a style. For me it's just a style. And plenty of other women out there and on this board feel the same way. And then there are some people who are against fake hair (weave, braids, etc) altogether. I really think it depends on the person as to why they are wearing the weave or braids.

It's funny though because men admire all these women celebs who wear weaves and wigs but don't have a problem with that. But as soon as a regular woman says weave they turn their noses up at it. And heaven forbid someone says the word WIG. And the thing is if it's a good weave they shouldn't be able to tell anyway. Everyone thinks the curly weave I usually wear is my hair. Even the dudes that were like ewww!! weave!! Then when I told them they were like really? but it looks so natural!! Then after they realized it was gonna be around for a while I got the whole why don't you wear your own hair thing?

I get the whole why do you wear weave in your hair question all the time but I don't really feel like breaking down my reasons to men. Women don't really care. I think many black women assume that all black women with long hair have weave (which we know is not true) and don't even make an issue of it. Shoot its my hair and I'll do as I damn well please with it. And come December when they see how much a whole year in weaves has made my hair grow they'll be looking like . And I'll be saying I told you so...

 

[Kitkat]

Oh, I get such a kick when people have that mindset because, as this forum proves, it's not necessarily true. I wear braids often and am in braids now. It kills me to see the double-takes people do when I remove them, followed by "why do you wear braids when you have so much hair?" Braids are great. There's no way I would have been able to handle this humid, rainy summer without them, because every day would have been a bad hair day. And I don't need to spend 45 minutes per nite roller setting, either.

And so what if women who wear weaves or braids don't have much hair? If these women are using either method to help them achieve hair health, length, or both, more power to them. Braids have grown my hair tremendously over the past four years, so, hey . . . whatever works, IMO.

 

[caribeandiva]

i can't speak on either cause i've only had braids in once for 2 weeks and weave for a month. i do sometimes think that women who are always wearing weaves don't have hair. i know that weaves break hair so i just assume that the weave broke all their hair so that's why they have to keep wearing them.

 

[sweetascocoa]

i had a weave once and i took it out. I like braids though....Most men dont really care though. They cant even tell the difference

 

[FlowerHair]

My SO hates weaves with a vengeance! He even said he prefers short hair in a nice style to weaves or braids. I think most guys are against the "natural" look. They want us to just come out of bed looking like movie stars erplexed

 

[FAMUDva]

My SO hates weaves with a vengeance! He even said he prefers short hair in a nice style to weaves or braids.

My SO feels the exact same way! I've never in my life worn a wig, but as a teen I wore braids every now and then just because I had thick hair and I live in the SOUTH! I haven't worn braids for probably about 10 years, so I can't speak on either.

I personally don't want a weave or braids for myself because as far as braids were concerned I hated sitting for so long to get them and then sitting for so long to take them out! Plus they always seemed to reck havic on my thickness, so I stay away from them too pretty much.

 

[sareca]

I don't wear weaves but I do wear braids. My husband said the only thing he doesn't like about braids is that he thinks other people think I don't have hair. I'm like Why do you care what some random person thinks about my hair?

 

[kandegirl]

Yea ,weaves get a bad rap. Personally I wear both as a protective style but men prefer braids. Women on my job even comment on why do I wear weaves or say something lke "I wonder how long you're going to wear your real hair out this time". I'm like you better be glad I respect my elders b/c you're all up in my koolaid and don't even know the flavor. But even when I try to explain to them that I wear them to grow my hair out and not damage my own hair from daily abuse, they still don't get it. But they always come to me for hair advice. So I just take there comments as a compliment So utimately I say do what makes you feel comfortable. And keep your hair healthy while you do it.

 

[ak46]

It's funny...I have a cousin who forever has a weave on....we see her real hair maybe once or twice a year. Whenever she has her real her out, everyone is shocked because her weaves are always shoulder length or APL but her real hair is actually BSL. She says that having the weave on makes it much easier on her when it comes to school and work and also she gets to put as much heat as she wants on the weave without damaging her own hair.

 

[1QTPie]

This is my thought on this. I think men think that weaves and fake fingernails etc are creating a lie. You're putting something on you that is not a part of you so they don't know what they are getting. So if they think they like long hair on a woman and they find out that the person they met only has 4 inches of hair, it can be a blow. I can understand where that comes from.

I also think that if there weren't so many BAD weaves out there, this wouldn't be an issue. Lots of people wear weaves that look so fake, it's painful. Or they wear the braids just a little too long.

Tell your SO not to worry about what's going ON your head unless he's paying for it.

 

[Plenty]

My SO thinks that women who wear weaves don't have that much hair.
So I asked him what is the difference between wearing braids or a weave.

SO: women who wear braids are not trying to make it seem like it's
their however women who wear weaves are trying to make it seem like it's there real hair.ME: but some women wear weaves that are shorter then their real hair just for a new look.

SO: if you look at some women walking down the street you will see a lot of women with home made weaves that are jacked up.
If they want to rock a weave at the very lease they can get it done right.

ME: But braids are fake and i wear them all the time so what would be the difference if I get a weave.

SO: you have hair you don't need a weave and a lot of women who wear braids only wear it as a hair style.

ME: so do a lot of women who wears weaves

So: ya but women who wear braids take it out in a few weeks, women who wear weaves ALWAYS wear weaves every time you see them they are rocking
a weave.

ME: ya ya ya but I'm still getting one.

SO; I like your braids leave them in.

So what do you all think about people thinking because you weave you don't have hair
I also know that people also think that when you wear braid but who get it more.
I have never had a weave so i can't speak on that.

I have ALWAYS felt this way

 

[ynvme]

Pleeeeeease..Im not even gonna go into men that think like that cus I am dating one as well. His problem is that he is used to dating puerto rican women..so my weaves...braids...phony ponies and extensions are like to him. *shrugs shoulders* Im tired of trying to explain.

 

[plove]

This is my thought on this. I think men think that weaves and fake fingernails etc are creating a lie. You're putting something on you that is not a part of you so they don't know what they are getting. So if they think they like long hair on a woman and they find out that the person they met only has 4 inches of hair, it can be a blow. I can understand where that comes from.

I also think that if there weren't so many BAD weaves out there, this wouldn't be an issue. Lots of people wear weaves that look so fake, it's painful. Or they wear the braids just a little too long.

Tell your SO not to worry about what's going ON your head unless he's paying for it.

I'm leaving my braids in for 7 months, I think I'm going to go for a year.

My SO ALWAYS pay for me to get my hair done when I get cornrows.
so, when he tell me you don't need a weave why don't you get some cornrows, I take him up on his offer.

 

[Cheleigh]

Honestly, I'm not that far away from agreeing with your SO. I'd never heard of wearing weaves as protective styles until I joined this forum. Most folks I see wear weaves because they either like to change it up all the time (their hair color and styles) or because they want to add length/thickness to their own hair (or were hiding hair damage).

I always thought that if you had any length to your hair, you wear it out/down. If you don't want to fuss with it too much, you put it in a bun or a ponytail. If you don't want to take the time to do your hair everyday anymore, you cut it short (or got some other low maintenance style). erplexed

I think many consider braiding is a bit of an artform, so people can appreciate braids (from micros to kinky twists) on their own merit without thinking so much about hair length.

 

[glamazon386]

Honestly, I'm not that far away from agreeing with your SO. I'd never heard of wearing weaves as protective styles until I joined this forum. Most folks I see wear weaves because they either like to change it up all the time (their hair color and styles) or because they want to add length/thickness to their own hair (or were hiding hair damage).

I always thought that if you had any length to your hair, you wear it out/down. If you don't want to fuss with it too much, you put it in a bun or a ponytail. If you don't want to take the time to do your hair everyday anymore, you cut it short (or got some other low maintenance style). erplexed

I think many consider braiding is a bit of an artform, so people can appreciate braids (from micros to kinky twists) on their own merit without thinking so much about hair length.

I understand what you're saying. And most people I wuold think share your opinion but believe it or not, short hair is more maintenance than long hair. If you're relaxed. You can't just slap that hair back in a ponytail on a bad hair day. I remember having to be in the salon EVERY week when I had a short cut. Never again. For me weaves and braids require the least amount of maintenance. I don't even have to comb in the morning if I don't want to.

 

[MissYocairis]

ME: ya ya ya but I'm still getting one.

SO; I like your braids leave them in.
.

This part was so to me. My SO is the same 'cept he doesn't like weaves OR braids. He does not want me wearing them at all. Now, he won't talk about someone else wearing them, he'll respect their choice, but whenever I'm like: "I'm getting a weave/braids". He's like

I've had two weaves before and both were nightmares for me so I cannot contribute much. But, I like the weave concept for some versatility. Braids...too much WORK. How about a "clip in" or "half wig" as a way to ease your SO into the idea?

 

[senimoni]

I agree with Cheleigh. Not that some aren't doing it as a protective style, but I would say a good 80% are NOT getting weaves as purely a style, they are getting it to continue to cover chewed up damaged hair.

 

[Denim And Leather]

This is my thought on this. I think men think that weaves and fake fingernails etc are creating a lie. You're putting something on you that is not a part of you so they don't know what they are getting. So if they think they like long hair on a woman and they find out that the person they met only has 4 inches of hair, it can be a blow. I can understand where that comes from.

I also think that if there weren't so many BAD weaves out there, this wouldn't be an issue. Lots of people wear weaves that look so fake, it's painful. Or they wear the braids just a little too long.

I totally agree with this. When I used to wear a weave, I never told the guys I was dating that I was wearing a weave, and would always get scared when they touched my hair for fear of feeling the track marks, and the disappointment that would come in knowing that my hair wasn't really that long! Hopefully they didn't think I was bald underneath the weave.

And I've seen some seriously jacked up weaves and women with months old braids in their hair around here. Ugh.

Honestly, I'm not that far away from agreeing with your SO. I'd never heard of wearing weaves as protective styles until I joined this forum. Most folks I see wear weaves because they either like to change it up all the time (their hair color and styles) or because they want to add length/thickness to their own hair (or were hiding hair damage).

I always thought that if you had any length to your hair, you wear it out/down. If you don't want to fuss with it too much, you put it in a bun or a ponytail. If you don't want to take the time to do your hair everyday anymore, you cut it short (or got some other low maintenance style).

This is exactly how I thought before coming to this forum as well. It never occured to me that some women do wear weaves as a protective style, but now I see that some do. I'm still inclined to think that most women who wear weaves do so for instant length or to hide damaged hair.