Is our hair Really as fragile as we think?

I ask this because when I was really getting fed up with my hair someone here asked me what I was doing to my hair when it was long. And when I thought about it I realized I was doing everything everyone says I shouldn't be doing and is bad for your hair. I washed every 2 weeks at best, no deep conditioning except when I got a relaxer, I greased my scalp every day, used the curling iron several times a week. I didn't take any vits, exercise or anything and my hair was past my shoulders. But now its seems to be at a stand still. Should I go back to my old methods? I feel like I'm putting in so much work to have healthy hair but my hair still seems mad at me for the damage I've put it through the last 2 years or more. What do you think? Are CO washes, protective styles, vitamins, protein treatments and everything else we do really necessary for long hair, or is it just necessary for healthy hair? Or is it necessary at all? I'm so confused /images/graemlins/cry3.gif

Is your hair hardly growing or is it constantly breaking? You should determine what your hair is responding well to and keep doing those things. My hair does not respond well or at all to a lot of loved products on this board. Ponytails make my hair break.
Figure out what works for you, but don't change a lot of things at once. Just one at time to see if it is good or bad for your hair.

Was your hair long and healthy or just long? Seems like it would be difficult to have healthy ends using a curling iron a couple of times a week, but maybe you're the exception. /images/graemlins/confused.gif

Q, ponytails break my hair something awful. Its not long enough to just twist into a bun. My wraps don't come out well, so I just don't know how to wear my hair anymore. I do twistouts that occasionally look like something worthwhile. My hair doesn't seem to break or shed nearly as bad as it used to. But before, my hair was always thick, shiny but I can't attest to the health. I was a lot younger then and wouldn't have known if it was healthy or not. I'm at wits end.

My hair looked its best when I was washing and flat ironing every two weeks and putting kemi oyl on my hair every night. It grew pretty fast too and the funny thing is I didn't even care whether it grew or not. I will prolly go back to doing that after I reach my brastrap goal just for comparison.

I think you should stick to what you're doing. Why go back to habits you know aren't healthy for your hair? I'm totally stealing this from my beloved Tracy, but concentrate on things you can control which attribute to your hair health. And spend less time focusing on things you can't control, like your hair growth rate. Maybe something in your routine isn't working, so slowly deconstruct. Don't stop everything at once. It takes awhile to find what really works for you, what you need to stop breakage, what keeps your hair healthy and vibrant. I think we all have these moments when no matter what we do and we know what we're doing is an improvement, it seems not to matter. But see it through. If you keep doing what's right your hair has no choice but to reward your efforts, but IT TAKES TIME. I swore I wasn't progressing and here I am 1/2 inch from reaching my first goal in just 6 months! And it was a goal I thought I was working towards for last 2 years, you know when my hair just wouldn't grow /images/graemlins/tongue.gif. Maybe your hair isn't so fragile, but treat it like it's precious and delicate all the same.

Best Wishes Sweetie. /images/graemlins/kiss.gif

Thanks Sengschick. I appreciate that. I guess patience is the real key.

Yes my hair is as fragile as I think, but pampering it has not did my hair much good either. Im about to cut it and say the hell w/ giving it all this attention because its not paying off for ME.

Honeycomb I'm about there myself.

since i started transitioning, i noticed my new growth is very strong and elastic while my relaxed hair (which is overprocessed and thin on the ends) is fragile and can easily break.

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since i started transitioning, i noticed my new growth is very strong and elastic while my relaxed hair (which is overprocessed and thin on the ends) is fragile and can easily break.

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I noticed this as well.

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Was your hair long and healthy or just long? Seems like it would be difficult to have healthy ends using a curling iron a couple of times a week, but maybe you're the exception. /images/graemlins/confused.gif

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When I was younger..high school, college and till I got preggo with my first..I use to wash, blowdry and curl my hair every single day and I had long healthy hair..but I also got a trim every 6-8 weeks..

Oh yes my hair mos def is as fragile as I think. Just looking at it causes it to snap, crackle and pop! I am so fed up with it, but everytime I think of giving up I don't. I'm not as obsessed as I was before and have given away A LOT of my products.

If you treat your hair well 90% of the time, everything will be just fine. Remember ...develop a routine YOU CAN STICK to; nothing that seems too extra or time consuming for YOU. You have to maintain whatever gets you there! The basics are just as good for an overall healthy head of hair. Shampooing and deep conditioning your hair every two weeks, use little to no heat, clip your ends as need be, little to no chemicals, touching up new growth only (no overlapping), and keeping your hair moisturized is a basic recipe for healthy hair. The bells and whistles are bonuses, but not prerequisites.