Feeling a bit discourage....

[Kinkyhairlady]

Last night I did not sleep well at all because I was having all these disturbing dreams about people from my past. Lately I have been feeling so down with my relationship with God. I have been a Christian since I was a child but in my twenties I struggled a lot with my faith.

I used to think I was blessed with certain things in life but now I am wondering if I just got lucky and it really had nothing to do with God blessing me with anything. There are things I have been praying for and I have gotten no answer and I am just really frustrated and angry at this point. I have been praying to find a church home for over a year and still nothing, I am tired of visiting churches and I do not feel the connection. I have asked God to show me a sign but still nothing. Is he listening to me? I am beginning to think that he is no longer listening.

I feel like walking away honestly and just live my life and whatever can happen. Some people just have to ask God once for something and they get it, is it because he loves them more? The fact that I can’t find a church has really made me feel sad, I don’t feel motivated to go on Sundays cause I don’t have a set place to go. I really need some encouragement now, bible verses to read, anything. I am really beginning to think he does not love me.

 

[PinkPebbles]

Hi Ellis -

If you have known the Lord as a child, IMHO I don't think things happened by chance or pure luck. God was hovering and covering you then and still is now. His word reminds us that He will never leave or forsake us .

In the bible, Job did not hear from God for a while. And I'm quite sure it must have felt as if it was for an eternity. Nonetheless, the Lord was with him. Our relationship with God cannot be based on how we feel at the moment, but knowing He is God, our maker, the God who created the heavens and the earth, the God who is Omnipresent, Omniscient, and Omnipotent.

I encourage you to hold on. Weeping may endure for a night and even a couple of days but joy does come in the morning. Remember in Christ Jesus you have that resurrection power within you . On the third day our Lord & Savior rose after affliction and persecution. So dear one, you will rise.

I truly believe in my heart that we ALL are moving in an era that all we are going to have is our FAITH to depend on. Our faith in God is what going to sustain us.

So I pray that the Lord will give you strength and peace. I pray that you will not fear, but the Lord will give you power, love, and a sound mind in Christ Jesus. May the Holy Spirit minister to your heart; as well as renew and transform your mind based on the word of God.

(((HUGS))) for you. Hold on...:Rose:

 

[chrstndiva]

Hi Ellis,

First of all . So sorry you are feeling discouraged.

Just a question for you. When you pray and petition God, do you meditate or pause long enough to hear the answer? A lot of times we pray, , say amen and that is that until next time and we don't pause long enough to give God a chance to speak to us.

I often find that just spending some alone time with God, asking what His will is for my life allowing him to speak to me, showing me what He wants and just basking in His presence makes a huge difference.

I will be praying for you.

 

[Poohbear]

Ellis, I feel some of what you are saying. I would encourage you to read this thread: http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=413914

 

[Laela]

Ellis,

It's OK if you feel this way.... we all have days like this. Your post reminds me of the story of David, 1 Samuel 30, when he was so down and out that everyone was out to get him, that he chose to encourage himself in the Lord. Sometimes, you have to encourage yourself and not rely on others to encourage you. God wants us to turn to him whenever we need him and I believe such times are allowed for this very reason.

Like David, encourage yourself in the Lord, pray and ask God what does He want you to do next. Praise him in the Storm, because he's ALWAYS with you.

I've found that the best times to praise God is when I don't feel like it or want to. And a blessing always follows. Stay encouraged.

 

[sidney]

Hey Ellis,

Sometimes God can feel so distant, but remember the word says 'he will never leave you or forsake you.' Whenever I feel like this, I repent always , because I know he hears the prayers of the repentent heart (and then I can be confident that he heard me). God blesses us all, he is no respecter of persons. Just keep seeking him. Just keep holding on, things change, seasons change. No one has a perfect walk with God but his love for us does not depend on our faithfulness, but his! I pray God move mightily in your life and that there are many new beginnings for you. May he bless you anew and renew you! Remember that even when you can't hear his voice, there is a plan in place for you. Trust that God has a plan.

-Sid

 

[loolalooh]

Last night I did not sleep well at all because I was having all these disturbing dreams about people from my past. Lately I have been feeling so down with my relationship with God. I have been a Christian since I was a child but in my twenties I struggled a lot with my faith.

I used to think I was blessed with certain things in life but now I am wondering if I just got lucky and it really had nothing to do with God blessing me with anything. There are things I have been praying for and I have gotten no answer and I am just really frustrated and angry at this point. I have been praying to find a church home for over a year and still nothing, I am tired of visiting churches and I do not feel the connection. I have asked God to show me a sign but still nothing. Is he listening to me? I am beginning to think that he is no longer listening.

I feel like walking away honestly and just live my life and whatever can happen. Some people just have to ask God once for something and they get it, is it because he loves them more? The fact that I can’t find a church has really made me feel sad, I don’t feel motivated to go on Sundays cause I don’t have a set place to go. I really need some encouragement now, bible verses to read, anything. I am really beginning to think he does not love me.

I can relate to much of what you're saying, especially the bolded. This was me for many years. I can tell you for certain and without a doubt that He is listening. It took a car accident in which my car was totaled but I walked away unharmed to realize that He is very real and has been with me from day one.

I then began to reflect on other "signs" in my life of His presence. When I was in elementary school, I became unconscious in a pool and almost drowned ... but He saved me. I thought back on my mother who sufferred a stroke but is still alive and has regained mobility to walk, talk, and write again. The list goes on and on and is very much too personal to share on this forum but you can PM me if you like ...

I had seriously forgotten all these "signs" because He was NOT answering my current prayers. I was frustrated because I was listening to worship music, searching for a church for over 2 years, trying to be a "good Christian" and he was answering other's prayers but not all of mine. Then the car accident happened. I walked away but my car was a goner. Then I heard Him say to me "You need to start obeying me". And soon I saw that the prayers I had been praying were not lining up with His will. That though they were not bad prayers, they were not the ones He wanted me to pray. That I had been ignoring His voice/guidance for the most part ...

I encourage you to pick up the Bible and start with the New Testament. Read it daily and you WILL start to hear God and see the "signs". There are going to be some days where you just don't want to read, but persevere through the days.

I'm not going to lie. I am still growing spiritually and have a ways to go, but with over a month of delving into the Word I already feel closer to God than I ever have before. I can only imagine how close I will feel after a year ...

Also, I am not talking about just reading, but absorbing, picking apart, and understanding each verse to its very core. You will begin to see what it means to really pray and to really have prayers answered. You will see what it means to feel the presence of God and more. I quickly learned that God enjoys it and prayer is most effective 1) when we pray according to His will ... 2) when our desires align with His will ... 3) when we let go of grudges against others ... 4) when we have genuine faith in Him ... etc.

I just know in my heart that He will reveal Himself to you soon. Be prepared and keep your heart and ears open. You just have to keep on ... continue persevering. Don't give up. As I said, I was searching for 2 years and I'm just now finding my church home. I am actually glad it took me this long because I think it was His intention that I truly be ready to embrace this as a home. I can say that I wasn't ready 2 years ago.

 

[Kinkyhairlady]

Thanks ladies for the encouraging words and bible passages. I meant to read the book of Job last night but did'nt, I will make it a point to do so tonight. I know the Devil is messing with me and that is getting me so mad. These thoughts of sadness and being upset with God have been happening lately but I know I have to try to fight it. It is just so hard, I keep focusing on how lousy my life is and how I have no direction. I will continue to pray to God and hopefully he will answer my prayers, especially the church one, cause I really need a church home.