I don't know what to do for the best..

[CharUK]

I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Hi guys.

I know it's only been 2 months since i've found this board, but I really expected some results by now.

my hair just won't stop breaking and it's really depressing, especially as I used to have nice THICK hair, forget about length, I just want my thick strong hair back

I feel like crying.

Anyway, i'm thinking of doing my extensions again, I did them for three years before.

I just might grow out the entire perm and be done with. Relax has never agreed with me, but then again, I didn't know all of what I know now.

I really need to make a decision soon, i'm in my 8th week post touch up and my hair continue to break daily.

 

[Falon]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

I'm sorry to hear about your hair problems...you say you have been taking care of your hair for two months now...what was going on with your hair before then?

Because the problem might be that your hair was damaged beyond repair before you started to apply the healthy hair techniques you have learned...if that is the case then you may have to do a BC and start all over again. But maybe it can be saved...why don't you give some more info on your hair and regimine and maybe one of us can come up with something.

I would say try everything...once the hair is cut you have to wait for it to grow so you might as well see if you can save your hair.

 

[Wolftrap]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Have you ever stretched your relaxer before? Stretching relaxers are not for everyone and a lot of ladies experience a lot of shedding if they stretch theirs. I noticed that in my hair too. The longer I stretch the more breakage I get. As soon as I get my touch up it stops.

 

[M_BYRON_M]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

I know what you mean char

Its taking long for me but i set myself little targets .My breaking and thinning hasnt completely stoped but I have seen some results .I know what you mean bout crying when i take out my hair sumtimes i feel a little upset .

Just keep on persevering and youll make it

"I couldnt believe when i found the infusium 23 thing in Peckham today"

 

[Queenie]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

I have had plenty of problems with that. I recommend daily moisture, minimal heat, deep conditioning with protein weekly, and stay away from mineral oil & petroleum in products. That is how I have been able to stop breakage and improve elasticity.

 

[CharUK]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Hi again.

Thanks for the replies!

O.K, I have a wave nouveau, I started it again after a three year break, in 2002. Actually, come to think of it... I had a RELAXER in 2001, I grew it out and in 2003 I wave nouveaued my hair again (about the third time) in January.

All was well, but I didn't paricularly care for it, and it started thinnning BIG TIME towards the end of 2003.

I couldn't take it anymore and cut it in February 2004, once again, it started thinning again, so I cut more off in May 2004.

It just has not been the same since, it doesn't even feel like my hair anymore, it feels nasty.

It is the first time i've stretched out for so long, so maybe it just isn't for me? Either way, i'm sick of the whole thing, I might just grow it out AGAIN with braids, it just costs quite a bit of money to do it constantly.

My regimen so far.

Wash, once every 12 days, any more than that and my hair just cannot deal.

I moisturise every other night (when I remember) with either WGO or motion oil 9, then apply moisturizer/activator and sleep with a silk scarf.

I use porosity control or aphoghee evening primrose shampoo, then aphoghee keratin reconstructor, followed by a conditioner like porosity or whatever else I have, followed by either lekair or lustrasilk deep conditoner.

I think that's it really.

I have many products at the moment, and I just can't use them all, I also have surge, doo grow thickening oil, castor oil and coconut oil.

To be honest, the oil is always dripping at the sides of my face, it aint cool!

Also, something strange happened when I washed my hair last night, the conditioner WOULD NOT lather up!? Strange huh?

 

[AJamericanDiva]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

So Char, you're currently in a Wave Nouveau? If so, what moisturizers are you using? I know it's supposed to be a "dry curl"....

 

[CharUK]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

I use soft'n'free moisturiser and activator in one, with added herbs, it's heavenly and not greasy at all.

 

[Tene]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

bump

 

[Neroli]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

When I just can't stand my hair anymore and nothing I do seem to "work" I put in braids. Period. For me, that's a sign that I need a mental break from dealing with my hair and also, give my HAIR a break. Sometimes just braiding it up for a couple of weeks to a month (preferably much longer) can do a world of good for my emotional and psychological well-being! When I take the braids down, I have a whole new attitude and my hair seems to behave better. If you don't want to go into braids for an extended period, just do a simple braided style for a few weeks to take your mind off your hair. Whatever you decide, things WILL improve with time . . .

 

[zigzag1]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Char
Try Aphogee treament profectiv breakfree and lusters s curl.
The aphogee treament every 6 weeks, and use lusters and breakfree on a daily basis. This worked for me with breakage (my hair is short but has stopped breaking) so now I'm hoping for growth. Char I hope this is of some use to you. You have such nice hair.

 

[aqualung]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

[ QUOTE ]
CharUK said:
Anyway, i'm thinking of doing my extensions again, I did them for three years before.

I just might grow out the entire perm and be done with. Relax has never agreed with me, but then again, I didn't know all of what I know now.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'd quit all the chemicals for a few years and grow the hair thick again using braids. That'd prevent you from styling it excessively. You might surge your scalp while the braids are in, eat protein, and take your supplements for faster growth.

Did you ever in your hair history find a relaxer or texturizer that AGREED with you? Lye? No lye? Would you consider being chemical free and flat ironing when you want a straight look? You need a plan for when you come out of the braids.

 

[Tai]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

From what you're saying, taking a break or transitioning might be a good idea. Being in braids for a while might be able to give your hair the break it sounds like it needs.

How do braids work for you? Is your hair stronger after you've been in braids for awhile?

 

[CharUK]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Thanx for the ongoing advice guys, megon, you are right, I need a plan.

I definitely think braids are the way to go for me, it just seems that after getting back my nice hair, in go the chemicals and eventually i'm back to square one

To be honest, I don't even remember what relaxer I used, I only had it relaxed for about 6 months, and it broke off (I got it relaxed straight from w/n) so I braided it.

I don't know the difference between lye and no lye, I'd like to try a texturizer IF my natural hair is too unruly.

x

 

[AJamericanDiva]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

[ QUOTE ]
CharUK said:
Thanx for the ongoing advice guys, megon, you are right, I need a plan.

I definitely think braids are the way to go for me, it just seems that after getting back my nice hair, in go the chemicals and eventually i'm back to square one

To be honest, I don't even remember what relaxer I used, I only had it relaxed for about 6 months, and it broke off (I got it relaxed straight from w/n) so I braided it.

I don't know the difference between lye and no lye, I'd like to try a texturizer IF my natural hair is too unruly.

x

[/ QUOTE ]

I hope you haven't been interchanging the wave nouveau and the relaxer as they are made with two different chemicals and are NOT interchangeable. This will definitely cause hair breakage. The thio from the Wave Nouveau and the hydroxide from the relaxer, be it lye or no-lye don't mix!

 

[CharUK]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Hi again.

Yes, my hair is always stronger after a LONG bout of braids, like, a year or so.

Diva, I hadn't been interchanging, I had w/n and changed to relaxer, it didn't work out then I put my hair in braids for almost two years, then I got the w/n again.

x

 

[Miosy]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Hey Char

When I first found a hair forum, I messed with my hair more than ever. From about Dec'02 until July'03 I can honestly tell you I did more damage than good trying to do what every body else was doing. I had to learn the hard way that everyones hair is different and what works for one won't work for the other. After taking picture after picture and noticing no change/broken hairs, I decided to keep my hands away from my hair and give it a break.

I stretched out my relaxer and rarely every comb with a comb until I wet detangle. I have gotten so used to it that I can do any style without a comb, buns, braid-outs, bantu knots, french roll, flat iron, etc. Today, my ends are recovering but I'm reaching my goal day by day

It does seem like your using too much chemicals (switching from relaxer to wave noveau). Give your hair a total break from chemical for 6 months if you can. If you can't keep your hands out of your hair then keep it braided. I'm sure with the help of everyone your hair will began to thicken up again. Good Luck

 

[so1913]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

I'd recommend picking one of the following: Either ApHogee, treatment, Dudley's DRC treatment (both every 6 weeks) Motions CPR line(they have a detailed regimen for hair breakage http://www.motionshair.com/ht_4ss_hb.cfm), or the ORS line(stimulating shampoo, hair Mayo, and carrot oil). Do deep conditioning (min 10 min with moisturizing conditioner) at least once a week.

Roller sets would be beneficial (no heat appliances) until you get your hair in shape, and a light oil or cream moisturizer to seal, protect,and add moisture. Stay away from gels and hair sprays. Protective styling and keeping hair wrapped at night helps. Usage of wide tooth combs, and if you can minimize brush usage (more so boar brushes)that would surely help. Regular and more frequent trimmings so that the damage is being removed as your new healthy hair grows in. Once your hair stops breaking and gets into better shape, you can reduce the frequency of your trimmings, as long as you continue to properly care for your hair. Severe damage cannot be reversed, however, you can preserve the new hair that grows in and the hair that is not severely damaged. Just hang in there. It may appear nothing is working, but the breakage you are still seeing may just be the permanent damage that has already been done and will take some time to rid your head of the permanent damage. Just keep up with a good regimen preserving what hair that is salvageable and the new growth. Stay positive, in time you will surely see results...patience is the key.

YOU CAN DO IT!!!

 

[CharUK]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Thank you for the advice, I truly appreciate it!

I'm definitely going to get braids, and I think you are right, I've tried to hard, and my hair is not responding, so time for plan B!

x

 

[CharUK]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Thanx so1913!!!

xx

 

[AJamericanDiva]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

[ QUOTE ]
CharUK said:
Hi again.

Yes, my hair is always stronger after a LONG bout of braids, like, a year or so.

Diva, I hadn't been interchanging, I had w/n and changed to relaxer, it didn't work out then I put my hair in braids for almost two years, then I got the w/n again.

x

[/ QUOTE ]

Char, was the relaxer done on the hair that was previously treated with w/n? Any overlapping of chemicals on hair that was processed with a different chemical can result in breakage.

 

[CharUK]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

HI again.

Yes it was, my aunt was happy about doing it, but did it anyway, I only cut about an inch off.

About 2 months later my hair started thinning out BIG TIME, so I quit the relaxer after about 6 months and braided it for two years.

x

 

[AJamericanDiva]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

[ QUOTE ]
CharUK said:
HI again.

Yes it was, my aunt was happy about doing it, but did it anyway, I only cut about an inch off.

About 2 months later my hair started thinning out BIG TIME, so I quit the relaxer after about 6 months and braided it for two years.

x

[/ QUOTE ]

BINGO! Herein lies the problem. Which styling do you prefer, w/n or relaxer? If you decide relaxer, then stick with just that. For now, grow out the w/n with braids. If you decide to relax, you'll have to trim off the W/N bits. Have you ever had a relaxer on virgin hair, hair not previously treated with w/n?

 

[CharUK]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Hey there Diva.

No, I have never had a relaxer on virgin hair.

The thing is, after two years break, my w/n looked great, I got back ALL my thick hair! I just didn't care for it really well, I really took advantage, but I think i'm done with the w/n I just don't want a thin looking relaxer.

Once i've grown out everything and cut off ends, I used to do this at each braid interval, I will see how my natural hair works, if it doesn't work, i'm thinking of a texturiser, do you think this would be a good idea?

x

 

[AnnDriena_]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Someone commented on the POROSITY CONTROL. They said their hairdresser could tell they had been using it because it looked as if their ends had been dissolved. She didn't mention the POROSITY CONTROL her hairdresser just guessed. So the porosity control isn't something that should be used more than once a month, if that.
a little trim and good protein treatment and braids sounds like it would do you hair good. You look really nice in your avatar. Happy hair growing.

 

[AJamericanDiva]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

[ QUOTE ]
CharUK said:
Hey there Diva.

No, I have never had a relaxer on virgin hair.

The thing is, after two years break, my w/n looked great, I got back ALL my thick hair! I just didn't care for it really well, I really took advantage, but I think i'm done with the w/n I just don't want a thin looking relaxer.

Once i've grown out everything and cut off ends, I used to do this at each braid interval, I will see how my natural hair works, if it doesn't work, i'm thinking of a texturiser, do you think this would be a good idea?

x

[/ QUOTE ]

Char... I think this may be key... applying a relaxer on virgin hair. A texturizer would be great and can be done with a mild/regular lye relaxer left on for a short period of time so that it loosens up the natural curl without going totally bone straight. This presents good styling options in that it can be flatironed to go totatlly straight and worn curly when you wash it. Even if you're not getting the curls that you want, you can do braidouts, etc, Know what I mean?

 

[AJamericanDiva]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Here are some pics to give you an idea of what I'm talking about. I believe this salon uses Affirm mild relaxer left on for a few minutes. Curve They charge $150 and up for this... a bit pricey. I wish my hair was like this. I used to use a mild relaxer and do mine before I got into the hair growing, but different people did different things when they applied it so my hair wasn't quite straight, but too straight to be curly... very poufy, so to speak. I finally just relaxed it all the way, and even so, it is not done so it is bone straight. It's better to leave a little texture in the hair. This also helps when the relaxer is growing out as it isn't as hard to fight between the two textures. I just keep it moist.... If I want curls/waves/crinkles, then I do a braidout.

 

[CharUK]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Thank you

I'm not sure if i'm thinking along the same lines regarding porosity control, i'm talking about the shampoo and conditioner?

 

[CharUK]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

Diva, we posted the same time!

I'm really grateful for all the advice you have given me.

I'm checking out that link now.

 

[AJamericanDiva]

Re: I don\'t know what to do for the best..

[ QUOTE ]
CharUK said:
Diva, we posted the same time!

I'm really grateful for all the advice you have given me.

I'm checking out that link now.

[/ QUOTE ]

No problem, Girl!