Relaxing children's hair

M

missykeyana

New Member
Relaxing children\'s hair

Hi everybody. This is my first post here, and I just want to say that I like the vibe here.

I was wondering what you all thought about little kids and relaxers. Sometimes when I am out I see young girls with relaxed hair that is suffering (ex.teeny ponytails with split ends, balding hairlines). Some of these girls are 3 or 4 years old. I also see girls with relaxed hair that is thriving (ex. shiny, thick, etc.). Unfortunately, the suffering heads outnumber the thriving heads from my observations.

Right now I think that I would not relax my child's hair until she was old enough to make an informed decision and she knew how to take care of her natural hair. To put a age on that...maybe highschool age. Then, I would make sure that she is taking care of her relaxed hair properly.

So, what do you all think and why?

Thanks in advance,

Missykeyana

P.S. If this is in the wrong forum, sorry moderators. I wasn't sure where this topic would fit.
 
Re: Relaxing children\'s hair

Hi Missy Keyana and Welcome!
wave.gif


You really have to do what you feel is right for you and you daughter. I do agree with the points about seeing the young little girls with the short broken relaxed hair. This is because their mother's are either lazy and took the relaxing as an easy way out or they were not educated on how to properly care for relaxed hair. All to often it is the first one. They think relaxing will make it easier on them but in the longrun the child is the one suffering.

I made the decision to relax my daughter hair almost 2 years ago. She was six. At the time I thought that was the best thing to do. Her hair was breaking , dry and getting shorter every month. I was at wits end. Although I did relax her hair I did not see it as any easy way out. I tend to my daughter's hair in the same manner as I do my own. If I do daily washes on my hair, I do it on hers. I don't cheat on the products for her hair. If she requires a costly product I buy it for her hair.

Right mow her hair is healthy and thriving and she is gaining so much length. So for me relaxing at an early age worked out just fine.

In the long run you have to do what you think is best!

Good Luck!
 
Re: Relaxing children\'s hair

[ QUOTE ]
dontspeakdefeat said:
Hi Missy Keyana and Welcome!
wave.gif


You really have to do what you feel is right for you and you daughter. I do agree with the points about seeing the young little girls with the short broken relaxed hair. This is because their mother's are either lazy and took the relaxing as an easy way out or they were not educated on how to properly care for relaxed hair. All to often it is the first one. They think relaxing will make it easier on them but in the longrun the child is the one suffering.

I made the decision to relax my daughter hair almost 2 years ago. She was six. At the time I thought that was the best thing to do. Her hair was breaking , dry and getting shorter every month. I was at wits end. Although I did relax her hair I did not see it as any easy way out. I tend to my daughter's hair in the same manner as I do my own. If I do daily washes on my hair, I do it on hers. I don't cheat on the products for her hair. If she requires a costly product I buy it for her hair.

Right mow her hair is healthy and thriving and she is gaining so much length. So for me relaxing at an early age worked out just fine.

In the long run you have to do what you think is best!

Good Luck!

[/ QUOTE ]

Very well said DSD
clap.gif
 
Re: Relaxing children\'s hair

yeah relaxers are not an easy way out...mothers who are ignorant dont know that. if your hair is falling out from your perm then y would you slap a perm in the childs hair if you cant care for your own? I've had people coming to my aunts salon thinking that they didnt have to comb or moisturize their daughters hair on a daily basis because it was "straight". Man it mad me angry. CH is right thoug do what is right for you and your daughter. Another easier method is just leaving the perm in for half the time so your daughter wont have that super straight look sort of like underprocessing that's how my little sister's hair is. That way she still has her curl pattern but softer. O
 
Re: Relaxing children\'s hair

yeah relaxers are not an easy way out...mothers who are ignorant dont know that. if your hair is falling out from your perm then y would you slap a perm in the childs hair if you cant care for your own? I've had people coming to my aunts salon thinking that they didnt have to comb or moisturize their daughters hair on a daily basis because it was "straight". Man it mad me angry. CH is right thoug do what is right for you and your daughter. Another easier method is just leaving the perm in for half the time so your daughter wont have that super straight look sort of like underprocessing that's how my little sister's hair is. That way she still has her curl pattern but softer. O
 
Re: Relaxing children\'s hair

yeah relaxers are not an easy way out...mothers who are ignorant dont know that. if your hair is falling out from your perm then y would you slap a perm in the childs hair if you cant care for your own? I've had people coming to my aunts salon thinking that they didnt have to comb or moisturize their daughters hair on a daily basis because it was "straight". Man it mad me angry. CH is right thoug do what is right for you and your daughter. Another easier method is just leaving the perm in for half the time so your daughter wont have that super straight look sort of like underprocessing that's how my little sister's hair is. That way she still has her curl pattern but softer. O
 
Re: Relaxing children\'s hair

Ayeshia - sometimes, when the computer is slow, I hit the 'continue' button more than once... resulting in duplicate/triplicate posts.
laugh.gif
laugh.gif
 
Re: Relaxing children\'s hair

Thanks for the replies y'all. I don't have a daughter yet, but maybe one day. I do know that if I am blessed with one, I want her to look her best. I don't know...I guess my mind was wandering or something..
drunk.gif
 
Re: Relaxing children\'s hair

My mom started relaxing my hair when I was six. I really wish she had given me the time to learn how to care for my natural texture, and I think in that way, I would've learnt early on that tightly-curled, thick hair is just as beautiful as any other type.

Of course I've reached that point now that I'm older, but I would've preferred to have realized that from a very young age. Although she never said anything negative about my hair, I think the mere fact that she relaxed it conveyed a detrimental message to me as a child. Just something to think about.~

Also, to add another twist to the discussion, I know people say that oftentimes it's a mother's laziness that leads to little girls with damaged relaxed hair. But doesn't the fact that a mother turned to a relaxer, rather than trying to fully investigate natural hair care for her child, reflect just as poorly on her?
 
Re: Relaxing children\'s hair

[ QUOTE ]
BronzeBrown said:
But doesn't the fact that a mother turned to a relaxer, rather than trying to fully investigate natural hair care for her child, reflect just as poorly on her?

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes. But some people want quick fixes and don't care about the consequences.
 
Re: Relaxing children\'s hair

[ QUOTE ]
BronzeBrown said:
But doesn't the fact that a mother turned to a relaxer, rather than trying to fully investigate natural hair care for her child, reflect just as poorly on her?

[/ QUOTE ]

I don't think that's always the case. While there's no denying that some women do relax because they don't know what else to do with their daughters' hair, there are also mothers who DO know how to care for their daughters' hair in a relaxed state and their hair thrives. If you can make it work, I say go for it.
smile.gif
 
Re: Relaxing children\'s hair

[ QUOTE ]
pebbles said:
[ QUOTE ]
BronzeBrown said:
But doesn't the fact that a mother turned to a relaxer, rather than trying to fully investigate natural hair care for her child, reflect just as poorly on her?

[/ QUOTE ]

I don't think that's always the case. While there's no denying that some women do relax because they don't know what else to do with their daughters' hair, there are also mothers who DO know how to care for their daughters' hair in a relaxed state and their hair thrives. If you can make it work, I say go for it.
smile.gif


[/ QUOTE ]
Ditto what you said Pebbles!

Also, I tried many times, many hairdressers, many hours of research to find what was best for my daughter's hair. I spent hundreds on products to help combat the dryness and breakage. I cared. But as a person who only knew about relaxers and not caring for natural hair it became a challenge and I eventually gave up. My duaghter's hair is thriving in it's relaxed state and I have no regrets. Now I have to educate her on what to do to keep her hair healthy and thriving. If she decides later on that she doesn't want to relax anymore than good for her. But as I stated before. I had to do what I thought was best for the time after exhausting all other efforts.
 
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