"Taking Back the N-word" - Thoughts?

[andromeda]

Saw this article on glamazini.net (great hair blog for naturals, if you haven't checked it out). I don't think it's been posted yet and figured it would be interesting to hear others' thoughts:

"Taking back the n-word", Sharon Watkins Jones
April 16, 9:27 AM

Nappy, adj. (comparative nappier, superlative nappiest)​

/næpi/

• (US, slang) Of hair: tightly curled or twisted; frizzy (occasionally specifically in reference to Blacks' textured hair, often used derogatively).

The use of the word, nappy, conjures up a plethora of anxieties in Black women that have plagued us since the dawn of American slavery.
Some historians maintain that slaves with skin color and hair texture most resembling white slave owners (and who sometimes happened to be progeny of said masters), often received preferable treatment, such as the “privilege” of performing work inside the master’s house, rather than the fields. The affect of this demarcation of Blacks possessing lighter or darker skin and “good” or “bad” hair still infiltrates the shared soul of the African Diaspora in America.
Generally speaking, in the Black community, there is no greater insult to a young girl or a grown woman than to speak of her hair as nappy. Just ask Don Imus. Upon hearing his depiction of an NCAA women’s basketball team as “nappy-headed hoes,” even the most sophisticated of us rolled our necks, snapped our fingers and began to take off our earrings and shoes in a collective, “Oh, no he didn’t!” Quite frankly, and disappointingly, Imus’s use of the word “nappy” was much more disturbing to many, than his descriptor, “hoes,” in online chat rooms, editorials and blogs...

My hair was pretty and it felt good. It was cotton-candy soft, thick and healthy. My edges were full and I had no broken ends or bald spots. I thought, “I have good hair! It’s really, really nappy, AND it’s really, really good.” As time passed, I was able to release the anxiety passed down to me from my great- great-grandmothers and praise God for the gift of nappy hair. My naps reflect my heritage and my personality. They are soft, strong, resilient and most certainly - - a force to be reckoned with. I am nappy and completely unashamed. God, in His infinite wisdom, placed nappy hair on my head because He knew I could rock it like I stole it. So, that’s exactly what I do.

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IMO, I don't believe the term is inherently derogatory (unlike the other n-word). I feel that it can be used in an objective way, merely as a descriptive term, or in a positive, socially conscious way, imbued with connotations of accepting the texture it describes and rejecting the derision the texture receives from others. However, because of the negative connotations, I would hesitate to use the word to describe others' hair unless I knew that they def would not take it the wrong way.

I'm transitioning, so I'll be happy when I'm finally, fully nappy!

What are your thoughts on the word?

ETA: Nonie posted an enlightening movie, 400 Years Without a Comb, that I would encourage everyone to watch, regardless of what your opinions on the word "nappy".

I realize that when a thread is as long as this, folks don't read all the posts so maybe posting yet again the videos of 400 Years Without a Comb may not be a bad idea in case someone missed them. As silly as this may seem, until I watched the movie, it had never occurred to me that slaves never had time to pack combs when they were taken from their homes. And the impact that this had on how they came to view their hair is sobering. It is especially so if you read the book Hair Story and see what a proud people Africans were of their hair and how elaborately they wore it in ways that had significance. So in addition to all the things you know they were robbed of that fall under "dignity" add to that self-respect--ie feeling good about themselves.

Here are the videos of 400 Years Without a Comb. I apologize to those who've seen all the posts in this thread that had the vids:

Part 1 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4cMf1heTa6A
Part 2 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=winJvvYCS20
Part 3 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CvMvNgFJ8zU
Part 4 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tRwLkS7W4oM
Part 5 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-FBFIA1Hks
Part 6 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rbXLbZhivOM

Here's a link to Nonie's full explanation and reaction to the movie (post #40) and a link to post #91, where Nonie shares a PM from another member about how watching the video and reading Nonie's posts changed her opinion of the word "nappy".

 

[wish4length]

I feel it can be just as offensive as the "other n-word", it just really depends on the context and who says it.

 

[JusticeMe]

I think its a word that is derogatory only because it has been used in the past in a derogatory manner. But If we learn to "unlearn" that negative connotation than we can use as it was originally intended as a descriptive word.

However, I don't believe this is true for the other "N" word.

 

[SweetSpirit86]

I'm a context personal as well, on this one. There are times you can say "napp" like..."C-Napp" and it's considered okay because it's like...no one means it in a negative way. At the same time, if it's used with the intent of being an insult, then it's a problem. There are a lot of words like this...technically neutral. It's just the user's intent that makes it bad or good. I don't just refer to black women's hair as nappy. Sometimes I just refer to knotted or tangly hair as nappy lol. It has nothing to do with the color of the person's skin or their hair type...rather the current state it's in.

 

[anon123]

I am ambivalent about it. I know people compare it to the other n-word, but it was never on the same scale as that. For example, I can ask my mother "is her hair nappy like mine?" while I could not say something like "is he a n!gg@ like my father?" That would be crazy. It just never had that level of terrible connotation to it for me.

On the other hand, I know people used it primarily as something negative in my real life experience, so I understand if people don't want to use it or are wary about it.

I just don't have any better word to describe my hair. Seriously, "curly" doesn't cut it.

 

[Ronnieaj]

My question is, if the word is meant to connote tightly curly/coily hair, where did this word originate from? What is the etymological background of the word? Same with kinky, same with frizzy. I'm not personally fond of the word, and I don't appreciate it being used to describe my hair--I mean really, I've got spirals on my head. It doesn't have to be a negative word, but I have a hard time believing that the word was originally neutral. If anything, I think it has become neutral through time, but I wouldn't consider it a positive.

 

[berryblack]

Until I became natural, I cringed whenever I heard the word. Growing up, it was NEVER used in a positive context. My mother, especially, was always telling me how nappy my hair was---even after I relaxed it. In fact, that was one of the reasons I went natural...finally, I didn't have to fight my naps any longer.

 

[Auburn]

I see it as a double standard thing. "We" can say it but "they" cant.

 

[unalteredone]

I do not like it. I dont mind it when other people claim it for themselves...that's fine. But i dont want anyone using it to describe my hair. Sometimes my mother says nappy (in a clearly negative way) and it just pisses me off bc i know she believes in the good hair/bad hair BS.

 

[anon123]

My question is, if the word is meant to connote tightly curly/coily hair, where did this word originate from? What is the etymological background of the word? Same with kinky, same with frizzy. I'm not personally fond of the word, and I don't appreciate it being used to describe my hair--I mean really, I've got spirals on my head. It doesn't have to be a negative word, but I have a hard time believing that the word was originally neutral. If anything, I think it has become neutral through time, but I wouldn't consider it a positive.

I thought it originally came from the nap for the curl of a sheep's wool. So kind of equivalent to saying "woolly" hair. Could be wrong about that, though.

 

[SelfStyled]

I see it as a double standard thing. "We" can say it but "they" cant.

You have a good point Auburn. This pretty much is how I feel too, but I have to say I do take offense when "we" use the word derogatively as well. Think: those of us that are not enlightened and still believe there is such a thing as "good hair" and "bad hair".

 

[nysister]

I have 4/a/b/c COILY hair.
It is not kinky.
That would imply that I do not take care of it, and let kinks form.
It is not nappy.
That would imply that I have frizzy unkept hair on my head.
It is not hard to deal with.
In fact it loves me, and once I learned to love it, it's been nothing but easy to deal with.
My hair is often misunderstood by many, but it is much loved by me, and I'll not play into calling it a word that could ever be construed as derogatory.
And when the movie Happy to be Nappy comes out, and the word seems "sanitized" and some fool of any color calls my hair nappy. They just might be picking themselves up off of the floor.

 

[Auburn]

You have a good point Auburn. This pretty much is how I feel too, but I have to say I do take offense when "we" use the word derogatively as well. Think: those of us that are not enlightened and still believe there is such a thing as "good hair" and "bad hair".

I was just about to edit that to say: They can mean the other "races" or someone being snooty about it. I totally agree.

 

[Evolving78]

when i was natural, i got comfortable with using that term to describe my hair. other folks felt uncomfortable around me and i knew when certain folks were insulting me when they used that term.

 

[NerdSauce]

For the most part I try not to get offended when other people use it because I know they generally don't have bad intentions, especially when they're referring to themselves, but its really not part of my vocabulary (unless I've said something like C-Napp or something) I understand Mwedzi's explanation that curly doesn't really describe her hair. Having something like springs myself, of varying sizes but more or less small, I do tend to think of my hair as coily, and when undefined, frizzy or maybe kinky.

One thing that I feel is that calling it nappy is kinda misleading.. I can't tell you how many people have no idea whatsoever what 'black' hair feels like (and I'm sure I don't have to) but at the end of the day, especially on a strand by strand basis, it just feels like hair. Its almost like 'nappiness' imparts a sort of otherness onto what grows out of our heads that while understandable, I find unnecessary. My mother always told us that word was offensive-- and when I think back to high school where girls called their little beady-beads "N*gga Naps" I can't say I have a hard time understanding why. As it is it makes me uncomfortable. I honestly don't believe you can change something's meaning by intention or desire--it still means what it means. Sky is still blue, the grass its still green, and both N-words still have incredibly derogatory origins. And I think its nothing short of insensible to keep in my vocabulary words that would offend me if anyone else said them, to be completely honest--so that's why I avoid them. I'm really not into double standards of any variety-- double thinking my way around something that could otherwise simply be avoided is not my cup of tea.

 

[msa]

I don't use it in mixed company because most people still consider it, and use it as, a derogatory word. If I'm describing my own hair I'll call it coily since it is made up of coils.

It doesn't bother me unless people use it in a negative manner. The sad part is every black person I know, aside from myself, only uses the word as an insult.

 

[Anew]

I don't mind it, my hair is nappy.. Even when its meant to be used negatively I'm just like okay and?!?!?!

Just like when people tell me how skinny I am. Yes I know and so what else?

 

[princessnad]

What can I say, I think nappy hair is beautiful!

 

[that_1_grrrl]

I only hate it when it's used as an insult, which I hear often unfortunately. I don't even mind it when someone says that about their own hair in a "my hair is tangled" sense, which I hear now and then. But when you make the stink face and say, "Soandso's hair is nappy", me no likey.

 

[Nonie]

I have never have a problem with the word nappy. In fact, I had no idea anyone had any issues with it until I joined hair forums. I shared my opinion ad nauseum on a thread where someone was mad coz a white girl called her hair nappy, so I'll simply give links to my posts in that discussion if anyone's interested:

http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showpost.php?p=4197977&postcount=37
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showpost.php?p=4198881&postcount=63
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showpost.php?p=4199497&postcount=75

 

[Ramya]

I would probably be offended if anyone referred to my hair as nappy. I don't use the word and I don't like the word and the connotations surrounding it. If other naturals want to embrace the word then that's their choice but this natural doesn't ever plan to.

 

[ceebee3]

The word doesn't bother me at all. I'm a relaxed nappy head.

http://www.billcasselman.com/wording_room/nappy.htm

Just a bit of the article

Etymology of THe Word Nappy
The word nappy began its life innocently enough as the adjectival offspring of the word nap. Nap is a fuzzy surface layer on yarn or cloth. Nap is teased up or raised higher by brushing the cloth against a rough surface. Our common weed teasel is named because it was used long ago to tease up the nap on cloth. Nap on wool was often shaved off and used to fill pillows. A number of words were brought to England during the 14th and 15th centuries by Dutch weavers who came to Britain to ply their trade. One of these words from Middle Dutch was noppich , ‘nappy’ an adjective referring to cloth that had a fiber-thick surface layer that could be trimmed down or teased up and cut even.

Late in the 18th century or early in the 19th century, Americans in the southern U.S. began to refer to negro slaves as nappy heads, comparing some tightly curled negroid hair to the nap on some cloth or fur. It was not a compliment. Beaver hats were said in early Victorian times to have a ‘fine, black nap.’

 

[AwesomelyNappy]

I think my hair is awesomely nappy and I love it! I know most people think of it as an insult, so i use the word carefully and infrequently.

 

[Krispi3]

I ask, take it back from where? I don't think the word orginated in Africa.

 

[Hairsofab]

I know nappy is often used as an insult. But I'm not offended by it. If someone called my hair nappy, even if they meant it in a deragotry way, I guess I just wouldn't think anything of it. My hair isn't straight, wavy, curly or any of that. It is kinky, nappy, cottony etc.

 

[Southernbella.]

I use it to describe my hair. *shrugs* What else would I say? Like Mwedzi said, curly doesn't fit. I say kinky sometimes, but I prefer nappy.

When people around me use it in a negative way, I usually say, "so what's wrong with nappy hair?", and they get to stuttering and trying to think of something to say. I like that because it forces them to ask themselves that question.

 

[Southernbella.]

I don't mind it, my hair is nappy.. Even when its meant to be used negatively I'm just like okay and?!?!?!

Just like when people tell me how skinny I am. Yes I know and so what else?

Exactly.

 

[KEWLKAT103]

I like the word nappy. I use it about myself all the time.
I would never use it in a negative way though.

 

[kryolnapps]

I don't have a problem with the word nappy in itself only because it wasn't an emotionally charged word as I grew up speaking french/creole. We use other words to insult tightly coiled hair like mine .

I just know that I don't mind using nappy to describe my hair in the virtual word, but IRL, I haven't heard it used in a positive way so far. I just say I have natural hair. I don't give a @#$% to whether they think I have nappy, good or bad hair. However, sometimes, I school them: I was getting my hair braided and the girl said 'I could never go natural, my hair is too nappy. You don't have nappy hair, your hair is soft'. I told her, yes, I have nappy hair and my hair is soft. Soft and nappy are not contrary.

 

[NappyMD]

You know, I never really thought of it as a negative word. My parents never used it negatively. I used to want to hide my nappy, which is mainly coily but does share the tufty properties related to it's etymology, but now I love it. I love the feel and versatility. I thought nothing of incorporating the word into my screenname, had no idea it offended anyone. I do have family members that talk negatively about fros and kitchens, but one of them also said, "MLK died so black people didn't have to wear their hair that way" when I went natural. erplexed

so I don't listen to those people anyway