Real Talk: Hair Confessions

I can't stand having PS's in my head longer than 2 days. After 2 days I have to take it down, wash/condition, M&S, and redo it. It doesn't help that I'm tender-headed.
 
I really don't want to flat iron or blow dry my hair for a while, not that I hate heat at all. I just don't want to do any extra steps on wash day.
 
It annoys me when I find that people have used me for my hair info.

ETA: Someone with no hair maliciously massaged a perm into my nape when I didn't know better years ago, and as a result, the nape is shorter than it used to be. I have to make a conscious choice to drop the anger and really kick in with some solutions.

And I have been spending way too much time on here lately.
 
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Saludable84~

I agree with making that assumption, my husband is east indian and blk. and I though he perferred my hair straight:nono: He hated the weaves and LOVES when I wear my hair in curls, braid outs everything BUT straight..lol
:grin:

kandiekj100 - people act that way about my daughter and I dont like it, she is more than her hair!!

nissi- yeah this happens alot, try to friend you up with questions then up pop the hair questions, but then I think I really like sharing this information BUT only if they take HEED. Don't have me wasting my breathe about this or that....just saying dang...lol
 
People often don't believe my hair is my own.:nono: I have 3B hair that is only shoulder length, but my curls are loose, round, and shiny. I often have women with 4A-Z hair that constantly try and clown on me for no reason. They always ask "Is that your hair?" And when I say yes they always ask if they can touch it:perplexed. Hell no! I don't want anyone's grimy hands touching me. Then they always say "I knew it was a wig!" they laugh in my face and then leave. I even have people who wait until I'm leaving or turn around to grab as much hair as possible and then they yank! :nono: I have to curse at least 10 women AND men out a week for that bs!! I work on retail btw. It makes me angry that no one believes I need to take care of my hair. Like I can just leave it and it magically grows on its own. No! I take care of my hair, and I'd like some recognition for that! Ugh I don't know anyone with my hair texture and I'm tired of every other natural calling me a fake, or saying that I should be lucky I'm mixed and I have "good hair". Do people really think my hair doesn't tangle, or get dry? I seriously wanna strangle people with these thoughts :nono:
 
I really don't need to moisturize and seal every day but I do it out of habit. So my moisturized fluffy hair one day is usually limp the next.
 
I'm kind of obsessed with hair now. So much so that I thought I wanted to go into cosmetology. I later found out I just like doing MY hair. But I'm still obsessed.
I look at everyone's hair. I look at mine even more. I'll go to the bathroom just to look in the mirror at my hair. I'm always touching my hair. Thank You God for two strand twists because that would otherwise be a problem. I'm totally not used to my hair being this long and I'm only coming up on bsl and I know my hate will grow longer. I won't know WHAT to do with myself when I reach wl.
I talk about hair a lot too. Luckily my bf doesn't mind and my friends like hearing what I have to say.
I think hair forums are partially to blame for my sickness sigh.
 
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frogkisses said:
People often don't believe my hair is my own.:nono: I have 3B hair that is only shoulder length, but my curls are loose, round, and shiny. I often have women with 4A-Z hair that constantly try and clown on me for no reason. They always ask "Is that your hair?" And when I say yes they always ask if they can touch it:perplexed. Hell no! I don't want anyone's grimy hands touching me. Then they always say "I knew it was a wig!" they laugh in my face and then leave. I even have people who wait until I'm leaving or turn around to grab as much hair as possible and then they yank! :nono: I have to curse at least 10 women AND men out a week for that bs!! I work on retail btw. It makes me angry that no one believes I need to take care of my hair. Like I can just leave it and it magically grows on its own. No! I take care of my hair, and I'd like some recognition for that! Ugh I don't know anyone with my hair texture and I'm tired of every other natural calling me a fake, or saying that I should be lucky I'm mixed and I have "good hair". Do people really think my hair doesn't tangle, or get dry? I seriously wanna strangle people with these thoughts :nono:
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People are just ignorant.
 
SmilingElephant said:
I live on the South side of Orlando.

Idk where the other 3s are hiding....:crying3: The only other type 3s i DO see are Hispanic women...but they have that fine/silky type 3 hair...mine is coarse 3c...Medium, even. It doesn't shine like the typical type 3 hair you think of...it has sheen but it doesn't shine and its not fine....for the most part.

There was only ONE other girl at my job that had my kind of hair...but she was kind of stuck up (well, that was my vibe from her...i could be wrong) and i never really spoke to her...she doesn't work there anymore.

Also....am i wrong for feeling like im in a petting zoo? I HATE when my coworkers boing my curls or feel the need to touch my hair. I think type 4 hair is amazing and when i first went natural i thought i would be a type 4 :yep: In fact i am in LOVE with the Type 4 curl pattern that is at my nape..you can't really see it though unless i lift my hair up...but even though i find it beautiful...i don't just feel the need to touch ppls hair. And they always catch me off guard! I almost popped this one girl in the nose because she scared me when she pulled on my hair!

Idk...im just frustrated...and sleep deprived....and stressed. Happy Friday all :)
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Well, u r not the only waking petting zoo let me assure u
 
I'm still afraid to wear my twa to work because I think I may be fired. Is that an irrational fear? This is partly because years ago a black college student that worked here wore an african print shirt for his presentation later and he was told he had to change. Too ethnic I guess. Some of these people here are just...ugh!
 
I have lost all sympathy for our hair complexes. I just find them insidiously silly and annoying now. Do people not grow?
 
TWA stage is the hardest to get over. I only have one hair style option. Oh! And my hair has like zero curl because of the length.
 
Killahkurlz SmilingElephant Yes I agree, people are very ignorant. I remember when Shameless Maya shaved her head off and people on the forum were "unimpressed because it would just grow back in a year." Stuff like that makes me cringe. Southern California doesn't have any 3 b/c that I can find either! I can't find anyone on YouTube that has hair like mine, only some similarities
 
My confessions:

While I love my natural hair, it has become a burden since I'm not the best at styling. My s/o who is Hispanic encouraged me to wear my natural hair which I have for about 2 months now but real talk, I miss my weaves. I miss flatironing, heat curling and the wind blowing through my hair.

I'm tired of being frustrated that my twist outs don't to seem to last long. The simple fact I have to do my hair often get on my nerves. Also getting called sista soldijah, nappy roots and village girl is getting old real quick.

If I could stand the feeling of a relaxer on my scalp, I would relax my in a hot second but then again, I would miss the natural bush.

I wished I had the same texture and curl pattern all around. My left side is more of a 4a/b mix which the texture is kinda rough but the right is more 4a and the texture is slightly smoother. The nape is 4a on both sides except the middle is wavy due to the weight of my hair now and I hate it just because styling is harder in that area.

Oddly enough, I do love my hair and how versatile it is plus I love the natural darkness of my hair. I often get ask if I color/dye my hair. I also love my shrinkage. ...I get a huge kick when I pull my hair straight and see how long my hair is straight compared to when in it's curly state.
 
One of the main reasons I still go see my stylist (aside from having her cover my grays) is because I love all the compliments I get on my hair. :look:
 
I've been waiting to get this off my chest.
My confession?:

I love my hair straight, it looks so much better on me. It complements any and every outfit and it's easy as pie to maintain at night.

I wish I could wear it straight all the time and still enjoy the abundant health of abstaining from heat. :(
 
frogkisses said:
People often don't believe my hair is my own.:nono: I have 3B hair that is only shoulder length, but my curls are loose, round, and shiny. I often have women with 4A-Z hair that constantly try and clown on me for no reason. They always ask "Is that your hair?" And when I say yes they always ask if they can touch it:perplexed. Hell no! I don't want anyone's grimy hands touching me. Then they always say "I knew it was a wig!" they laugh in my face and then leave. I even have people who wait until I'm leaving or turn around to grab as much hair as possible and then they yank! :nono: I have to curse at least 10 women AND men out a week for that bs!! I work on retail btw. It makes me angry that no one believes I need to take care of my hair. Like I can just leave it and it magically grows on its own. No! I take care of my hair, and I'd like some recognition for that! Ugh I don't know anyone with my hair texture and I'm tired of every other natural calling me a fake, or saying that I should be lucky I'm mixed and I have "good hair". Do people really think my hair doesn't tangle, or get dry? I seriously wanna strangle people with these thoughts :nono:
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Same problem here. Thankfully I haven't had any people stupid enough to pull on my hair. I'd have to lay hands on them, and then pray for them.
 
I have like bipolar mood swings with my hair, one minute I'm loving it and the next i hate it and want to chop it off. I have never hated my hair like this even when it was coming out more because of me not combing properly and over manipulating it before I had knowledge about hair. But my hair was so much thicker before I joined lhcf and now I have thin ends I'm cutting frequently because of when I start to hate my hair again but I don't want short hair. I probably need to cut hair off to my chin honestly but I don't have the urge to do it.
 
I always think when people put food in their hair that they should just eat it. Its almost disrespectful in my mind to go to the supermarket and buy avocados and what not. Unless its going to compost or free, just eat it.
 
When people outside of the hair boards ask for hair advice it literally takes all that I have not too...

1. Test to find their porosity
2. Determine their strand size
3. Configure a Regimen
4. Take a trip to the BSS to find product that best fit their hair and regimen

ON SITE!

You may think I'm exaggerating, but I'm dead serious. Ask my coworker and 2 of my church members :nono:...:lachen:.
 
frogkisses said:
People often don't believe my hair is my own.:nono: I have 3B hair that is only shoulder length, but my curls are loose, round, and shiny. I often have women with 4A-Z hair that constantly try and clown on me for no reason. They always ask "Is that your hair?" And when I say yes they always ask if they can touch it:perplexed. Hell no! I don't want anyone's grimy hands touching me. Then they always say "I knew it was a wig!" they laugh in my face and then leave. I even have people who wait until I'm leaving or turn around to grab as much hair as possible and then they yank! :nono: I have to curse at least 10 women AND men out a week for that bs!! I work on retail btw. It makes me angry that no one believes I need to take care of my hair. Like I can just leave it and it magically grows on its own. No! I take care of my hair, and I'd like some recognition for that! Ugh I don't know anyone with my hair texture and I'm tired of every other natural calling me a fake, or saying that I should be lucky I'm mixed and I have "good hair". Do people really think my hair doesn't tangle, or get dry? I seriously wanna strangle people with these thoughts :nono:
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leiah Mz.MoMo5235, y'all need to come help frogkisses deal with haters' she has your hair type and needs emotional support.
 
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frogkisses You're not alone. Unfortunately there are a lot of people that dont realize "black" not only comes in different shades but in different textures. I go through the same thing and you just have to have tough skin about it. Just last weekend I went out with my hair in a wng and a co-workers boyfriend decided he wanted to clown my hair and say I had a jerri curl and started singing the soul glo theme song (I hated the fact I love that song at that moment). I just laughed rolled my eyes and told him how that was the first time anyone has ever said that and how original he must feel.

I've also had cases irl where other naturals have excluded me from hair talk because "I'm not 'really' black" or because "I dont really understand what its like to be natural"

HEIFER!!! I had to get off the creamy crack just like you and learn how to deal with something my mom didnt even know how to handle! I had to learn from scratch and believe it or not a lot of the the things I do other 4b-z's do as well. But you cant educate the world.

All you can do is come here to an environment where people understand you and accept your hair as is and make crazy vent threads about Indian people talking smack about your hair :look:

Ok... I'm done lol
 
Mz.MoMo5235 said:
frogkisses You're not alone. Unfortunately there are a lot of people that dont realize "black" not only comes in different shades but in different textures. I go through the same thing and you just have to have tough skin about it. Just last weekend I went out with my hair in a wng and a co-workers boyfriend decided he wanted to clown my hair and say I had a jerri curl and started singing the soul glo theme song (I hated the fact I love that song at that moment). I just laughed rolled my eyes and told him how that was the first time anyone has ever said that and how original he must feel.

I've also had cases irl where other naturals have excluded me from hair talk because "I'm not 'really' black" or because "I dont really understand what its like to be natural"

HEIFER!!! I had to get off the creamy crack just like you and learn how to deal with something my mom didnt even know how to handle! I had to learn from scratch and believe it or not a lot of the the things I do other 4b-z's do as well. But you cant educate the world.

All you can do is come here to an environment where people understand you and accept your hair as is and make crazy vent threads about Indian people talking smack about your hair :look:

Ok... I'm done lol
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I'm not going to lie, before I joined the board i use to think all black people had type four hair or that they were mixed. I just was at my cousin's house and this girl, I assumed she was Hispanic or something and she struck up a conversation and she was like "you know us black people always got to have something in us" and I told my SO "I didn't even know she was black, she has like very defined curls type 3" and he was like" I could tell she was black, how could you not? I have people in my family who have that type of hair" I do as well but you know I ASSumed smh. It also goes for people who are mixed and they still have type 4 and people be like oh please, you don't have a mix of nothing lol
 
SmilingElephant, you can follow this YouTuber, she has a loose curl pattern. If I think of anyone else, I'll let you know. https://www.youtube.com/user/SunKissAlba and Shameless Maya

Please remember your hair is like a finger print, nobody's is the same. In addition, forget your IRL cast of characters, you have support here. HTH!

ETA: My fine hair idol Chicoro has type 3 hair. You can follow her on YT at https://www.youtube.com/user/MsChicoro Also, you can subscribe to her newsletter at http://www.beautifybitbybitgi.com/ In addition, I highly recommend her book Grow It. You may be able to check it out from your local library or request it through inter library loan (ILL) if they don't have it.

ETA2: You need to tell your friends that porosity, density, and how thick or thin each individual strand is more important than Andre Walker's hair typing system. It creates division in the hair community. Of course, you'll tell them this as you flip your curls that they hate on so much in their face:lachen:

ETA3: http://www.youtube.com/user/srdesigns1
 
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