OneInAMillion said:
I did this too! I only relaxed 6 years ago. While I don't know if the comb caused me any damage, persay, I was shoulder length +/- a few inches for a very long time. I think flat ironing may be best for you, trying to do it as little as possible. For example, try to go two weeks in between.
I don't like to make recommendations about relaxing or not, but with the alopecia, I would steer clear of the chemicals. Have you seen LynnieB's album? I believe she's transitioning and had an experience with alopecia. Her hair is lovely as well...
thanks for the compliment oneinamillion!
Blu,
at the
very beginning of my transition, i flatironed every week or two AND used a curling iron!
as more and more new growth came in, as the humid spring of North Carolina arrived, i came to the conclusion i was fighting a losing battle trying to keep that new growth in line with the relaxed hair - i KNEW how it was gonna go once the summer hit and i needed to change my styling habits pronto.
so i started experimenting with wash and go's (perfect for covering my bald spot(actually i had 2 and didn't know it!). they turned out awight but then it caused alot of unnecessary tangling (and detangling on alopecia'd scalp isn't what you want to do more often then necessary) so then i experimented with cornrows. i'd do half a head of them and plaited up the back half for braidouts.
then i started experimenting with twists. i'd do mini's and flat twists. the twists, i found i could stretch "over" the bald patch or, do creative partings to hide it really really well but then, i discovered mini twists were causing another problem with detangling. you may not have that same problem so don't count them out. the twists would set so solidly that i couldn't even get a brush or comb through them, wet, dry, w/conditioner, w/oils - it was too hard so i stopped doing mini and went to flat twists and medium sizes only and the detangling got so much easier to deal with.
as more time went on, and experimenting with the various natural hair styles, i realized that i really didn't need to flatiron as much as i thought i did - probably about once a month (this month i haven't flatironed at all!). the more new growth you have, the better it poofs out and makes coverage so much easier.
my primary styles are braidouts and twist outs. i do not like braids so i do twists also - med. sizes and flat twists and very little heat.
sometimes i blow out hair on med. or cool blowdryer settings to loosen the texture a bit.
to hide some of the scalpiness that you may be concerned about (me too!) - i have used scarves (the cloth sort you can pick up at walmart for a few dollars), pretty barretts, hair combs, hair pins to either cover the spot or like the scarf, to push the hair back, which will cover the spots with bulk.
you're gonna have to take some YOU time on the weekend or your day off and start experimenting on hair styles and techniques that will work for you. take your time so you won't get frustrated!
also, as far as using heat is concerned it can cause damage but you can definitely lessen that damage by using proper techniques and the right products (heat protectants - especially the protectants). you can also stretch out the time between heat sessions by using braidouts or twistouts. who knows, you may get sick of the styling hassles like i did and just wash, twist then twist it out after a while
.
you've got alot of options blu and even though personally i try to avoid frequent heat useage - i will not say it's for everyone AND, in your particular case, when you weigh the potential damage from flatironing against the damage from using those chemicals on your scalp - it's a no brainer as to which one would be the best choice at this time!!
girl, we'll ALL hold your hand if you do indeed decide to transition.
when you run into a problem, you know where to go.
when you feel discouraged, you know where to go.
when and if you have no idea of what to do next, you know where to go!
now, as far as products are concerned; i don't know if you're dealing with the itching/burning/tingling thing i had to deal with. if you are, i know it's horrible! but, there's somethings you can do to help lessen it.
witch hazel - natural astringent and soothing to your skin. usually stop that itch/burning/tingling thing immediately.
try the hair vitamins like biotin, msm, b-complexes but watch it, i found that biotin caused me some problems when the alopecia was active.
avoid getting any oils or grease on your scalp (until your sure it's not irritating - jojoba was good for me).
stop using harsh shampoos - you know the ones, the sulfates.
get good moisturizing shampoos and conditioners, you'll be needing them to keep your new growth happy.
if doing no or low heat - try 100% pure shea butter as a "grease" (it's inexpensive, natural and it may just work well for you). i use this on wet or damp hair before twisting/braiding. also try Wild Growth Hair Oil (not for scalp until you know if it's irritating or not) on your hair, it does soften wonderfully.
avoid putting tension on the hair surrounding the thinning or scalpy areas.
that's all i can think of right now.........and i really really do hope it helps.
again {{{hugs}}} and you already know you're not alone in that there are several ladies here who have had or are currently dealing with this.
NEVER lose hope, never!
lyn
ETA - no, i do not plan to big chop. i will do trim ends or a series of mini chops (1-3 inches) as i go along, feel like it or if my hair seems like it needs it (slow and easy transitioning for me)
.
) but I'mma keep an eye on this thread. 
