Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Unruly

[curlyninjagirl]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

I have a different opinion than most it seems.
If one child is at fault, they are all at fault.

The children in the class were wrong for the teasing and this needs to be addressed by the teacher and Principal.
But...if the little white girl is wrong then the 8 year old cousin was wrong too.
She should have said don't touch my hair, don't put water in my hair, leave my hair alone.

8 year old girls mess with each other's hair. That's a fact of life and why many parents try to train their children to say no don't touch my hair.

Unless that little white girl was being malicious which I doubt...then this is a learning experience for all the children. I really doubt that white child has any clue what reverting is or what a blow out is or how water affects Afro textured hair.

Kids are kids, especially young kids, and they are going to do innocent things that end up wrong. I think the expectations are too high for this child. She's what...in 3rd grade?

BTW: I grew up with water being used to do my hair or neaten up my hair. For the few years I was raising my two little sisters, the water bottle immediately came out when doing their hair. At 8 years old, I would understand them putting water to their hair if they thought to neaten it up. They would have no idea what reverting was either. When they played in my hair, they also used water.

I think we need to have age appropriate expectations. The little white girl was just imitating what has been done to her hair. She only knows what she knows.

I think the bolded is right on. Teasing can wreck a kid's psyche. All those little jerks shoulddah been punished! Also some of these comments are pure speculation and out of line.

I'm sorry your cousin had this experience, I know how bad it feels to be humiliated at such a sensitive age....but....

Why in the world are people spending $50 on an 8 year old's hair??? I'm afraid I agree with the white kid's parents on this. This is a public school, right? Why would you bring such extravagance to an environment where things get messy?

 

[GaiasDaughter24]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

Honestly, I think the girls may have been playing around and the white girl wanted to "help" with flyaways or something.She was doing what she or her mom does to her hair. I sense no malicious intent.

Instead of complainging about what happened between the girls, I'm trying to understand why the class got away with calling this child Aunt Jemima. THAT to me is a much bigger isuue than 2 (possible) friends playing in each others hair and one didn't understand the others hair type.

 

[ActionActress]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

One thing we should remember folks is they are EIGHT 8 years old and no--at that age white girls are NOT going to know about black hair. Sometimes we ALL do things--even in our adult life that can cause harm in one way or another when WE thought we were trying to help.

Just food for thought. That actually should have been teachable moment for the child. and not in a rough Ebonics way either.

AA

 

[Sistaslick]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

One thing we should remember folks is they are EIGHT 8 years old and no--at that age white girls are NOT going to know about black hair. Sometimes we ALL do things--even in our adult life that can cause harm in one way or another when WE thought we were trying to help.

Just food for thought. That actually should have been teachable moment for the child. and not in a rough Ebonics way either.

AA

I agree-- Half of us don't even know what to do with our own hair 20, 30, 40 and 50 years old! Let alone expect a pack of 3rd graders to get it right.

Now the Aunt Jemima stuff-- that's just outta line. My 8 year old doesn't even know who the heck that is-- let alone tease somebody about it. How would they even know to reference that as an insult? 9 times out of 10 that was probably her "brothas and sistas" in the class repeating some jacked up stuff they heard somebody say at home.

 

[rainbowknots]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

I really don't think it's that serious either (aside from the name calling). The child is 8 years old and I doubt her blow out would've lasted that long anyway. My mom didn't allow me to get perms as a child, and all it took was some running around and getting all sweaty for my hair to start curling back up (at least at the roots). If sweat didn't do it, rain or me just taking a bath and splashing water definitely did the job. It's just hair. It wasn't cut off, or burned, or ripped out of her head...it was simply forced back into it's natural state.

 

[Phaer]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

Lord knows some days I just want to grab some of the people I see on the train and pour some coconut oil on their hair ... but I've learned to restrain myself (barely)

Wait why should her and her parents be given a pass? It's not about her attempts to help! Did the girl ask your cousin if she wanted water on her hair? I'm not gonna run up to someone and pul gel on their edges because I think it should be slicked back and as a parent, you are supposed to train your child to keep their hands to themselves. I'm beyond the teasing that may or may not have been the reason behind this behavior. But the behavior in and of itself is unacceptable. Did she apologize? Defend the girl? If they were friends, she wouldve done both. If they were not friends, she should not have touched her.


That was so very nice of the hair stylist but those kids will not forget about her hair. Matter fact, the class needs to be talked to about the beauty of diversity.

 

[lovegymnasts]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

Now the Aunt Jemima stuff-- that's just outta line. My 8 year old doesn't even know who the heck that is-- let alone tease somebody about it. How would they even know to reference that as an insult? 9 times out of 10 that was probably her "brothas and sistas" in the class repeating some jacked up stuff they heard somebody say at home.

My 16 year old (nephew) saw me reading this thread last night and asked me what it was about. I told him and he did not understand the Aunt Jemima reference. He could only come up with the bottle of syrup. So while I was explaining it to him, I said it was like calling someone an Uncle Tom. He had no clue what that was either. He said Tom was white referring to Tom Sawyer so we had to have a talk about that too.

I hazard a guess that most of the kids that were in on the teasing have no clue what they were saying and just jumped on the bandwagon.

I still think this is a teachable moment on so many levels some of them being diversity, feelings, compassion, and self respect.

 

[DDTexlaxed]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

She's lucky it wasn't my cousin. My cousin would have punched her. I'm sorry, but she should have minded her own business. Kids aren't aren't as naive anymore. Some are mean spirited. Why would she need to fix your cousin's hair? I think the other child's parents should pay and the other child should be told that it isn't her place to "fix" anyone's hair unless asked to do so.

 

[ebonylocs]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

I don't get why people immediately think the worst about all interactions between white and black people. Not every white person is racist; not every white person is looking to "take black people down a peg"...some white people don't even care that you're black. Why so paranoid, LHCF?

I didn't see your post before I did mine, because the overwrought reactions got to me, and I just had to post before I finished reading.

Anyway, re what you said above. It's like some of us think of blackness and black features as this huge crucifix, and we are like Jesus climbing up to Calvary bent down with this heavy cross on our back, while everyone around us throws stones at us, spits on us, whips us, taunts us.

If you feel so victimised, you will either be defeated or angry. I'd rather not be either.

 

[Oasis]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

it doesn't sound like she meant any harm. BUT it is possible to have malicious intent at 8 years old. i was 7 or 8 the first time a white girl tried to "put me in my place."

 

[hopkinstudent]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

We all know that if it went down the other way, your little cousin would have been expelled...

 

[Guitarhero]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

In this thread, I've learned a few things:

1)water to Black girls is like Kryptonite
2)children should not touch, ever! (pattycake? LOL)
3)little white kids are seriously scheming evil ones, right out the womb
4)maybe segregation should come back so things like this don't happen again?
5)that maybe kids shouldn't get $50 blowouts and expect it to last 100 years



Here we are, ready to crucify or tar and feather an innocent child and her parent for keratin protein.

 

[fashion87]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

I know 10 year old little girls and younger that act like and mimic adults, so you guys keep thinking an 8 year old doesn't know any better......lmao

Her parents should've been teaching her to keep her hands to herself period, than none of this would've happened!

 

[CrissieD]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

I'm sorry that this happened to your cousin. The little girl was probably just playing with her hair because that's what little girls do. This should be used as a teachable moment by both sets of parents and by the teacher as well.

 

[SND411]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

So eight year olds are able to make fun of someone calling them "Aunt Jemima" but are incapable of having malicious intent by messing with someone's hair? Sure.....

I'm not saying the girl had to have malicious intent. Perhaps she did not. But it seems like EVERYONE is making a bunch of assumptions in this thread. Little kids can be mean, so you shouldn't assume her action was just all innocent.

 

[LoveLiLi]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

it doesn't sound like she meant any harm. BUT it is possible to have malicious intent at 8 years old. i was 7 or 8 the first time a white girl tried to "put me in my place."

Exactly. I was five yrs old, 1st day of school and a white girl asked me "Why are you so dressed up? You're a ni99er". So if another five yr old thought that I was doin' too much for a black girl, back in 1984, then who knows what could have been on this white girl's mind. (Let's call her Suzy because I don't want to keep calling her 'white girl').

Also, who are we to say what another person should spend on their child? The blow-out may have lasted another week or it may have lasted another 24 hours, who's to say. But that doesn't make it okay for Suzy to get it wet and her parents just shrug and say "Oh well, shouldn't have spent that much money, anyway".

Bottom line is, her hair was fine before Suzy got her little paws on it, so if Suzy doesn't have $50 bucks in her piggy bank, then her parents need to pay up.

*And...AND... I knew by the age of 4 that other kids better not play in my hair. I wish I would allow some kid to mess up my hair when I was little - my mother was having none of that.

 

[Spongie Bloom]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

I had to google aunt Jemima,

anyhoo the teasing is what stood out to me as malicious

 

[DeepBluSea]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

Do I think the little girl was racist? No
Do I think she was jealous? Yes
The little girl and the other classmates knew the little girl's hair looked different. I'm sure cuz was feeling her self too. They put the water on her hair to mess it up. It was a youthful prank, but mean.

 

[NYDiva]

Re: Little White Girl Puts Water on My Cuz's freshly Blown Out Hair because it was Un

really the op's cousin would know whether or not the other child was being malicious or really didn't mean any harm. an 8 year old is capable of both. so any assumptions by anyone else, either way, is just an assumption.