Man and a woman living together.....

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Irresistible

New Member
Crown,

There are lot of things we do that's not pleasing to God.:look:

A man can lust after a women ANYTIME, ANYWHERE. He doesn't have to be living with her to do so.

And women aren't brainless beings. To insinuate that women can look at themselves as completely incapable of saying NO to a man is laughable. It takes two to Tango.

But the Scriptures you post are dead on ... :yep: avoiding those situations (applying wisdom) is likely best. We can trust God, no matter our circumstance, to make a way for us out of compromising situations.
Indeed, when it was time and it was asked and prayed about by both of us a way was made

I wasnt ready , or so I thought........

But God knew I was and ehhh I'm doing alright , its been work on my part , but at least I am at the point of doing it:yep:
 

Crown

New Member
Crown,
And women aren't brainless beings. To insinuate that women can look at themselves as completely incapable of saying NO to a man is laughable. It takes two to Tango.

From my post, do you really think I say this, Laela, unless you are kidding :lachen:me ?

Seriously, maybe I am wrong, but Mat. 5:28 does not speak about act but about look. It takes 2 to Tango, it takes 1 to lust.
 

Laela

Sidestepping the "lynch mob"
:nono: To the contrary, quite a few women up thread have... are you saying you're the only one who sees that?

The sad thing about this is that no one is seeing the consequences of not seeing this as wrong.

We can agree to disagree without fault-finding and accusing people of having weak faith, not being a true follower of Christ, etc. I don't think God would be pleased with this approach either, for it's he who made us, not we ourselves.
 

Irresistible

New Member
From my post, do you really think I say this, Laela, unless you are kidding :lachen:me ?

Seriously, maybe I am wrong, but Mat. 5:28 does not speak about act but about look. It takes 2 to Tango, it takes 1 to lust.
But are we responsible for their lust? when it can happen under any and ALL circumstances

Now I am not talking about straight enticing a man, but then you dont have to for them to be most time

they are responsible for that , we cannot control the heart of man

man if I could I woudnt even be in pain in the first place to have been weak enough to allowed that situation in the first place:lachen:
 

Laela

Sidestepping the "lynch mob"
Naww... I wasn't saying you insinuate that. :laugh: That was a general comment for anyone to insinuate that.

yep...takes one to lust. Because a man lusts after me, doesn't mean he'll get me. I'M in control of that, not the man. If he's in control, it becomes RAPE. :yep:

From my post, do you really think I say this, Laela, unless you are kidding :lachen:me ?

Seriously, maybe I am wrong, but Mat. 5:28 does not speak about act but about look. It takes 2 to Tango, it takes 1 to lust.
 

Irresistible

New Member
This phrase can be applied to so many scenarios, including the turn this thread has taken. :nono: :nono:
I say we all have a big enough job being accountable to God for ourselves who can manage the job of doing it for others

or why?

I almost didnt even post

I didnt have to share

but its all good:wallbash:
 

Ramya

New Member
I say we all have a big enough job being accountable to God for ourselves who can manage the job of doing it for others

or why?

I almost didnt even post

I didnt have to share

but its all good:wallbash:

I think people need to realize that they are not the ultimate authority on all things Christian. It's not like anybody is asking for anybody else's permission to cohabitate. If you're really concerned about someone's relationship with God, why not pray for them? (without telling them) Why not be a good example? :ohwell:
 

Irresistible

New Member
I think people need to realize that they are not the ultimate authority on all things Christian. It's not like anybody is asking for anybody else's permission to cohabitate. If you're really concerned about someone's relationship with God, why not pray for them? (without telling them) Why not be a good example? :ohwell:
I cannot speak for MSA and would not, and would not judge her situation or even worry over it, its hers and hers alone to work out

but like I am openly saying I was a mess at the time and saying it happened mostly out of my own pain and fears and what not

who has ever had it all together all the time anyway?

nobody:spinning:

when did God run out of Mercy?
 

Irresistible

New Member
tThese are very gentle words ...

msa, I'm sorry that you were without a home. That's very unhappy place to be in life; not knowing where you are going to sleep in peace, let alone live.

I feel sad for both of you. The two of you had some very sensitive situations. As much as it seems right, we cannot confuse God's compassion and call it His permission. There is a major difference; a difference where we all as Christians have to be cautious of . If we don't, we'll live a life of compromise and make excuses for one thing after another, which we know is not right.

These living situations no matter how 'right' they seem to you, are not right to God. These are human decisions which both of you made as a result of human errors. God did not create the situations that lead to where you are; neither did He lead you to the decisions you made. These are your human choices, not His.

Irresistable, you were not responsible for your friend. God would not have set you up like that. As women, we tend to use the scenerio of events, to justify why we step in to help a man. The reason is that we care about him. Period! It was still not your responsibility to let him live with you. One prayer, "God please provide for him, to keep us from sin', would have solved it.

When something is wrong, it's wrong. God is not schizophrenic, He doesn't waver from one decision to another. He is fixed, completely and totally established in what He says and He is faithful to His word, eternally. How else can He be called faithful, trustworthy? He would not be God if He did not uphold His word or His integrety.

Over and Over, this fact will never change, that each of your situations are a result from a human decision, not God's. His 'allowing' these situations is only of His Mercies upon us; it is simply Him not overriding your free will.

When we're in trouble, our emotions take over and we will do whatever seems right to us at that time. There seems to be no other solution, yet God still has not changed. The 'peace' that one feels is not because God approves, it is because He cannot get through to you at this point of your decision. Yet God does not 'allow' us to stay there. It's not His will neither from the onset or the duration of the situation.

So many have fallen because of their 'human decisions'. In God's word, there is one example after another. God made His instructions quite clear to King Saul, yet Saul yielded to his human decision and lost his peace with God.

Sarah made a human decision which has cost the lives of multiple millions, even up to this day.

Esau made a human decision which changed the order of his birthright.

Today's war in the Middle East would not be if if were not for these two who made a very critical human decision.

Neither of you can say that God lead you to this. And it is dangerous for either of you to share this as a testimony, to 'prove' that you were able to this way and not succomb to temptation. That's misleading as a witness to Christ. Others will follow thinking because you did it, they can too. It's dangerously leading other Christians to 'flirt with temptation'.

This is totally against the will of God. For it will in turn go against what God has proclaimed. That He leads us not into temptation; and delivers us from evil. God does not play games. He does not 'dangle' sin in front of us to tempt us, satan does that, not God.

Christians do not live as the world does. We do not have to. There is always another way which is God's way. Even when we 'think' there isn't. When our emotions are caught up, it opens the door for satan to very cleaverly come in and lead us astray.

None of 'us' can afford to say God 's approval was in this; for we be responsible for others, lead to do the same, leading them to fall; for it is truly a dangerous trap for a sexual encounter outside of marriage waiting to happen.

You know, sometimes women allow themselves into this because they want so much to have the presence of a man in their lives. Men are just that good to be around. There is a wonderful 'difference' about the presence of a man in our home. Some women allow this, for it's the closest they feel that they will ever come to living with a man.

The bottomline is whenever we are in trouble, and the immediate solution of a situation is not 'ideal', we know it's not of God. It is a human decision that we have His grace and mercies upon.

God does not approve of these living arrangements. That's not His plan for our lives. We can't whitewash it; we have to admit this not only to ourselves, but to Him so that He can deliver us into His Perfect Plan.

This is not a lecture neither a put down. It's an embrace from the heart of God for each of His daughters.

The two of you deserve so much better. :Rose:
Sarah made a human decision and Abraham made a human decision, David made a human decision, Moses made a human decision etc etc, heck EVERYBODY in the bible just about made a human decision (or more than 1 LOL), except JESUS of course, and did not fall out of his favor or blessing

that is not to say there wont be consequence, but he is a just God all by himself and able to give RIGHTEOUS judgment and MERCY all by himself:yep:
 

Crown

New Member
But are we responsible for their lust? when it can happen under any and ALL circumstances
I can be wrong. But, if I understand Mat. 5:28, we have to do our best to not be responsible for their lust or to not lead them to lust. I am not speaking about act but about intention/idea.

All I have to say is, as Christians, we do remember that prayer is powerfull !

No judgement, just wisdom. I am not speaking about particular situation : it's not my job, I have enough to do with my own life. I just have to be a witness and pray.
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
This is sad. With all due respect to all who've posted in this thread, I believe it's is the responsibility of God's people to judge their brethren, according to the Word, when they sin. I can handle that. But when there's faulty thinking, like in this thread, questioning whether a person is even saved is a thin line. :look:
Matthew 7:1-5
Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother’s eye.

What's critical is not the judging but HOW it's done. If we're not careful, we can easily become an accuser of the brethren, with all the best intentions. Anytime we judge, it should be for the edification of others and for the glory of God, not to beat them down. It may be a cliche to some: but God knows our hearts. I'll never tire of saying that, because it is the truth.

I'd rather play with God than with the devil. At least, God will zap me with some retribution in the form of a good dose of the Holy Spirit for playing with him like that. :laugh: He will still love us, no matter what.
The devil, though, would just smile and not say a Word. He doesn't have to....
Laela, we have to very careful with the use of the 'judge' not scripture. For far too many use it to as a free pass.

The lifestyle 'questioned' in this thread is a mess! It's already judged itself.

The faulty thinking is not seeing the dangers of this lifestyle. The faulty thinking is that it is deemed 'okay', by Christians. The faulty thinking is that it is exempt from judgement. The faulty thinking is that it doesn't matter how it 'looks', it's still okay. The faulty thinking is that God 'arranged' it and He approves of it.

With all of the problems that the Church has with promiscuity, why on earth would any Chrsitian think that they could lie on the railroad tracks of this lifestyle and dare not think that a train would not be coming full speek ahead, and run them over.

Faulty thinking.... and that's not a game to be played with.for it truly endangers the image of the Body of Christ. And we cannot dare to fault others for judging it for what it is. It's an enemy of our faith and those who hold this faith dearly have every single right to judge it and speak up about it. It's not up for defense.

You know, when you speak of the 'accuser', we' can't continue to play the victim, especially if we allow ourselves to approve of or be in situations which draws the wrong attention. The accuser isn't always wrong. We have to stop giving him the ammo to use against us.

Are we all of sudden waving a banner that says, "Christians drop your guard, for anything goes." Are we now taking in 'compromise' as our roommates? I hope not. For I choose to stand upon solid rock, not sinking sand. I'm not weakening my stand, and I will not succomb to the worn out 'judge not' theory.

Trust me, I'm not coming against you, personally. I am coming against an enemy who is out to weaken the Church with a lot of foolishness. I'm not falling for it. A very dear price was paid for me to partake of this gift of salvation, I've lived this life of faith long enough and I know better. I know the tricks and the excuses that 'we' as Christians use to Godidfy the choices we've made, and God is no where in it. The sooner we learn this the stronger we'll be as Christians and defeat the real judgers and accusers.

I'm not unaware of the fact that people get offended when I speak up and refuse to back down on certain subjects that seek approval. There's always 'something' that will pop up here in this forum, seeking approval for a free pass to be accepted by God and Christianity. If it's not abortion, it's gay marriage, the loa is always looking for ways to be in here; then it's something stupid like vampires, harry potter, and now roomataes of the opposite sex? And there are 3 things that come out trying to win sympathy and acceptance of these issues:

1. "Well I'm a Christian and I believe it's okay....."
2. " Judge not, least you be judged...."
3. " This is why I never come into the Christian Forum..."
.
Anyhooo....... :rolleyes:

What's going to happen is if we do not acknowledge the reality of our Faith and what it requires of us; if we don't do it now, then we will never survive what's coming. Excuses and judge nots won't save us.

All in peace ... :Rose:
 
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Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
Sarah made a human decision and Abraham made a human decision, David made a human decision, Moses made a human decision etc etc, heck EVERYBODY in the bible just about made a human decision (or more than 1 LOL), except JESUS of course, and did not fall out of his favor or blessing

that is not to say there wont be consequence, but he is a just God all by himself and able to give RIGHTEOUS judgment and MERCY all by himself:yep:
Annnnd....... ? ? ?

Just because He is 'just' God doens't excuse human decisons.

The entire point is that these human decisions cannot be said they were of God's approval, which is what seems to be the 'message' in this thread, that God gave the 'okay' to have a male roommate. Which He did not do. God is not a vacilator.
 
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Irresistible

New Member
Laela, we have to very careful with the use of the 'judge' not scripture. For far too many use it to as a free pass.

The lifestyle 'questioned' in this thread is a mess! It's already judged itself.

The faulty thinking is not seeing the dangers of this lifestyle. The faulty thinking is that it is deemed 'okay', by Christians. The faulty thinking is that it is exempt from judgement. The faulty thinking is that it doesn't matter how it 'looks', it's still okay. The faulty thinking is that God 'arranged' it and He approves of it.

With all of the problems that the Church has with promiscuity, why on earth would any Chrsitian think that they could lie on the railroad tracks of this lifestyle and dare not think that a train would not be coming full speek ahead, and run them over.

Faulty thinking.... and that's not a game to be played with.for it truly endangers the image of the Body of Christ. And we cannot dare to fault others for judging it for what it is. It's an enemy of our faith and those who hold this faith dearly have every single right to judge it and speak up about it. It's not up for defense.

You know, when you speak of the 'accuser', we' can't continue to play the victim, especially if we allow ourselves to approve of or be in situations which draws the wrong attention. The accuser isn't always wrong. We have to stop giving him the ammo to use against us.

Are we all of sudden waving a banner that says, "Christians drop your guard, for anything goes." Are we now taking in 'compromise' as our roommates? I hope not. For I choose to stand upon solid rock, not sinking sand. I'm not weakening my stand, and I will not succomb to the worn out 'judge not' theory.

Trust me, I'm not coming against you, personally. I am coming against an enemy who is out to weaken the Church with a lot of foolishness. I'm not falling for it. A very dear price was paid for me to partake of this gift of salvation, I've lived this life of faith long enough and I know better. I know the tricks and the excuses that 'we' as Christians use to Godidfy the choices we've made, and God is no where in it. The sooner we learn this the stronger we'll be as Christians and defeat the real judgers and accusers.

I'm not unaware of the fact that people get offended when I speak up and refuse to back down on certain subjects that seek approval. There's always 'something' that will pop up here in this forum, seeking approval for a free pass to be accepted by God and Christianity. If it's not abortion, it's gay marriage, the loa is always looking for ways to be in here; then it's something stupid like vampires, harry potter, and now roomataes of the opposite sex? And there are 3 things that come out trying to win sympathy and acceptance of these issues:

1. "Well I'm a Christian and I believe it's okay....."
2. " Judge not, least you be judged...."
3. " This is why I never come into the Christian Forum..."
.
Anyhooo....... :rolleyes:

What's going to happen is if we do not acknowledge the reality of our Faith and what it requires of us; if we don't do it now, then we will never survive what's coming. Excuses and judge nots won't save us.

All in peace ... Rose:
I am going to have to speak for MYSELF right about now, on this one

that it was NOT faulty thinking

as I have said NONE of those things you are saying in this thread, not every situation is the same you know Shimmie, it just aint.

it was confusion and pain and a whole mess of other stuff, but have not sat here and said God promoted it, but I also will not say he was not with me through it. of course he was

I think like many things , while MANY of us are in pain and process or hurting or weak he is merciful, do you understand that at all?

I mean thats what Jesus did FOR ALL in the bible, he didnt turn his nose up to the woman at the well living with a man, no he gave her an answer , to the emptiness she was suffering in

you think Christians are beyond this kind of damage , pain and lost-ness?

man I wish I would have been truly I do, but I was not

so I walk away from this thread knowing HIS grace is sufficient for me and I need it not from another

I walk away from this thread , not where I should be but not where I was either

I also walk away KNOWING there is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus

the only thing I can say to you, is that you will NEVER know the heart of another like him, you do understand that right?
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
Shimmie its not a testimony to not sinning

its just a fact it was not sin

I cannot say God told me to do this or that, and did not say that, but I did what I did and its done

and nothing separated me from his love

what disturbs me most about your post is how you said or say things like 'God is not schizophrenic, you say that against us as though we think or are saying he is

I would just be careful with what you choose to judge or how and wording

dont know what else to say

btw we did say that prayer and there was no sin



other than i didnt post to have the whole situation analyzed or judged

I dont think anyone is on the throne with him to say how God will work things out for someone

As I posted , I have no major issues with my situation

it was what it was and I will not sit here and justify myself to anyone

I only need to do that with God

love and blessings girl :kiss:
My post is not intended to offend anyone.

However there is a strong impression in this thread that this living situation is an acceptable one to God, which will lead others to think that i's 'okay' to live this way, because so and so did it and so and so is a Christian.

I made it clear from the very beginning of my post that my words to you were gentle.

However, I am very hard on this issue and strongly against Chrisitan support of it; for it is a very bad reflection upon the Body of Christ, especially if more and more take on the attitude that there is nothing wrong with it, and leading more and more to take chances on doing so.

Love and blessings to you too. :Rose:
 

Irresistible

New Member
Annnnd....... ? ? ?

Just because He is a 'just' and God doens't excuse human decisons.

The entire point is that these human decisions cannot be said they were of God's approval, which is what seems to be the 'message' in this thread, that God gave the 'okay' to have a male roommate. Which He did not do. God is not a vacilator.
I do think he already knows we are human Shimmie

and to boot he knows even what we will do in advance, when he accepted us as his -aint that amazing

I cannot speak across the board on this issue and have not with a stamp of approval, I am only speaking of my own situation , and will not dare judge someone else's, thats my only msg

thats just me tho
 

Irresistible

New Member
My post is not intended to offend anyone.

However there is a strong impression in this thread that this living situation is an acceptable one to God, which will lead others to think that i's 'okay' to live this way, because so and so did it and so and so is a Christian.

I made it clear from the very beginning of my post that my words to you were gentle.

However, I am very hard on this issue and strongly against Chrisitan support of it; for it is a very bad reflection upon the Body of Christ, especially if more and more take on the attitude that there is nothing wrong with it, and leading more and more to take chances on doing so.

Love and blessings to you too. :Rose:
I pray you understand that most of what you said I faced hard core and it wasnt easy and that nowhere am I sending that message to anyone

I just know that I cant judge another, thats what I feel strongly about

Think of where you have been Shimmie and the things you once promoted both before saved and maybe even after, I mean we are all in process

we can still love one another! I do understand that you dont want a certain msg sent. Its just that some of us might have found ourselves in this situation and dont believe that God wasnt blessing ur or still with us

I'm glad he has never left me in my mess

No I would not EVER SAY to anyone do what I did and am not

In fact if they are not lost like I was at the time in so many ways in pain, I would suggest not, but I wouldnt judge them if they were, I think the main point is if there is no sin, there is no sin

that doesnt mean others could/would/should put themselves in that boat

well anyway, lots of love, I do get your point

we havent all arrived and the devil is sure busy keeping us wounded/hurting/beat down

I am just getting back up again in a new way

its a new day

you just cant judge across the board girl , thats all I am saying

well I'm losing what to say now without repeating myself

but harsh judgment hurts

when we do truly love the LORD and are just walking this walk the best we can, mistakes and all

not everyone is out to send some horrible msg to other Christians, some of us are just going through or gone through, maybe places we should not have been, but thats not to say he LEFT us

nothing so far has separated me from his love

whew thankful for that:yep:
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
:nono: To the contrary, quite a few women up thread have... are you saying you're the only one who sees that?



We can agree to disagree without fault-finding and accusing people of having weak faith, not being a true follower of Christ, etc. I don't think God would be pleased with this approach either, for it's he who made us, not we ourselves.

Laela, please do not take what I've said out of context. From my very first post, I opened it sharing the respect that I have for the women in this thread and that it is the 'subject' that I am addressing.

Further down there is a lax attitude which I addressed to one post only.

I'm not fearful of what others think of me. Now if I wanted to, I could truly point out the real issues going on in here by some who disagree with me. :yep:

The bottomline is that there is a 'weakness' in the Body of Christ with lax attitudes; and like it or not, those who do not see the dangers of lving with opposite sex roommates does indicate a crack in the dam; a weakness in the structure of our Faith.

Instead of getting offended because it's being pointed out, we should be working to seal it up. Otherwise it will just keep growing bigger and bigger until it's beyond repair.

You may as well get used to it. Shimmie is not going to be 'lovey huggy' all of the time. When it's time to embrace and comfort, I've never failed once to be there. Never! The majority of this forun knows that they can come to me at anytime, privately and not be turned away in their time of need.

I've been up at all hours being 'there' for those who needed someone to care. I am constantly clearing space in my PM box so that no one's cry for prayer is not able to get in. My box stays full and I am always lovingly there. So don't ever accuse me of being uncaring or judgmental, because that I am not.

However, the Church is in deep trouble and we need backbone to survive. We need to get over the tears and hurt feelings and make a stand of virture and not victim.. Because while everyone is so busy being offended, the enemy is only preparing the next offense, just to keep you distracted just enough for all hell to break loose upon you.

Just own up to the real issues and strengthen the Church. It's not for lack of love that the Church is falling. It's for the lack of Virtue and standing for righteouness.

Psalm 119 says... "Great peace I have I in your law and nothing shall offend."

Our feelings of offence are not going to win this. You have to get up and take a stand for Virtue and Integrety of the Church. There's too much slack and no one is standing in the gap. We're too busy crying over who hurt our feelings. Get over it. If you don't you're going to get trampled under the enemy's feet rather than he being under ours the way God commanded it so.

Again... I speak in peace :Rose:
 
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Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
I pray you understand that most of what you said I faced hard core and it wasnt easy and that nowhere am I sending that message to anyone

I just know that I cant judge another, thats what I feel strongly about

Think of where you have been Shimmie and the things you once promoted both before saved and maybe even after, I mean we are all in process

we can still love one another! I do understand that you dont want a certain msg sent. Its just that some of us might have found ourselves in this situation and dont believe that God wasnt blessing ur or still with us

I'm glad he has never left me in my mess

No I would not EVER SAY to anyone do what I did and am not

In fact if they are not lost like I was at the time in so many ways in pain, I would suggest not, but I wouldnt judge them if they were, I think the main point is if there is no sin, there is no sin

that doesnt mean others could/would/should put themselves in that boat

well anyway, lots of love, I do get your point

we havent all arrived and the devil is sure busy keeping us wounded/hurting/beat down

I am just getting back up again in a new way

its a new day

you just cant judge across the board girl , thats all I am saying

well I'm losing what to say now without repeating myself

but harsh judgment hurts

when we do truly love the LORD and are just walking this walk the best we can, mistakes and all

not everyone is out to send some horrible msg to other Christians, some of us are just going through or gone through, maybe places we should not have been, but thats not to say he LEFT us

nothing so far has separated me from his love

whew thankful for that:yep:
Irresistable... I think you know me far better than this. One day you're going to be tougher than me. :yep: I've been 'there' but I have something stronger to fight for and not against. The Church.
 

msa

New Member
tThese are very gentle words ...

msa, I'm sorry that you were without a home. That's very unhappy place to be in life; not knowing where you are going to sleep in peace, let alone live.

I feel sad for both of you. The two of you had some very sensitive situations. As much as it seems right, we cannot confuse God's compassion and call it His permission. There is a major difference; a difference where we all as Christians have to be cautious of . If we don't, we'll live a life of compromise and make excuses for one thing after another, which we know is not right.

These living situations no matter how 'right' they seem to you, are not right to God. These are human decisions which both of you made as a result of human errors. God did not create the situations that lead to where you are; neither did He lead you to the decisions you made. These are your human choices, not His.

Irresistable, you were not responsible for your friend. God would not have set you up like that. As women, we tend to use the scenerio of events, to justify why we step in to help a man. The reason is that we care about him. Period! It was still not your responsibility to let him live with you. One prayer, "God please provide for him, to keep us from sin', would have solved it.

When something is wrong, it's wrong. God is not schizophrenic, He doesn't waver from one decision to another. He is fixed, completely and totally established in what He says and He is faithful to His word, eternally. How else can He be called faithful, trustworthy? He would not be God if He did not uphold His word or His integrety.

Over and Over, this fact will never change, that each of your situations are a result from a human decision, not God's. His 'allowing' these situations is only of His Mercies upon us; it is simply Him not overriding your free will.

When we're in trouble, our emotions take over and we will do whatever seems right to us at that time. There seems to be no other solution, yet God still has not changed. The 'peace' that one feels is not because God approves, it is because He cannot get through to you at this point of your decision. Yet God does not 'allow' us to stay there. It's not His will neither from the onset or the duration of the situation.

So many have fallen because of their 'human decisions'. In God's word, there is one example after another. God made His instructions quite clear to King Saul, yet Saul yielded to his human decision and lost his peace with God.

Sarah made a human decision which has cost the lives of multiple millions, even up to this day.

Esau made a human decision which changed the order of his birthright.

Today's war in the Middle East would not be if if were not for these two who made a very critical human decision.

Neither of you can say that God lead you to this. And it is dangerous for either of you to share this as a testimony, to 'prove' that you were able to this way and not succomb to temptation. That's misleading as a witness to Christ. Others will follow thinking because you did it, they can too. It's dangerously leading other Christians to 'flirt with temptation'.

This is totally against the will of God. For it will in turn go against what God has proclaimed. That He leads us not into temptation; and delivers us from evil. God does not play games. He does not 'dangle' sin in front of us to tempt us, satan does that, not God.

Christians do not live as the world does. We do not have to. There is always another way which is God's way. Even when we 'think' there isn't. When our emotions are caught up, it opens the door for satan to very cleaverly come in and lead us astray.

None of 'us' can afford to say God 's approval was in this; for we be responsible for others, lead to do the same, leading them to fall; for it is truly a dangerous trap for a sexual encounter outside of marriage waiting to happen.

You know, sometimes women allow themselves into this because they want so much to have the presence of a man in their lives. Men are just that good to be around. There is a wonderful 'difference' about the presence of a man in our home. Some women allow this, for it's the closest they feel that they will ever come to living with a man.

The bottomline is whenever we are in trouble, and the immediate solution of a situation is not 'ideal', we know it's not of God. It is a human decision that we have His grace and mercies upon.

God does not approve of these living arrangements. That's not His plan for our lives. We can't whitewash it; we have to admit this not only to ourselves, but to Him so that He can deliver us into His Perfect Plan.

This is not a lecture neither a put down. It's an embrace from the heart of God for each of His daughters.

The two of you deserve so much better. :Rose:

The thing is, I know this situation is not of my doing, but of God's. Why? Because He's giving me a testimony that I'm able to share with many many foster kids just like me. He's made a way out of no way just for me. He created this situation and is making sure that my sister and I get through it as shining examples of His love for us.

Was being in foster care a result of my decisions? No.
Was not having any family to turn to a result of my decisions? No.
Was not having any place to go upon turning 18 a result of my decisions? No.

And through all that God has provided a place for me to live and be comfortable. He's made it so that I can have a "home base" just like other people have, so that I can be successful in my education and everything else that He has set out for me to do.

All through my life I've lived with unrelated males. As a child, in foster care, in college, and even now. And guess what? It was the males who were supposed to be "family" (stepfathers, etc.) who had inappropriate lust for me and not anyone else.

Right now I live with a family who took me in when I turned 18. They didn't have to, but they did. According to you, that's a sin. And you know, that's ok. Because I know what God is doing in my life and I know that He's made it so that there isn't any appearance of wrongdoing. Even in college when I had no choice but to live with a group of friends (including males), He made it so that no one could look and say "that situation doesn't look right".

So as I said before, everyone's situation is different. The people involved have to go to God about their own circumstances. Clearly, "shacking" (living with a bf/gf) is wrong no matter the situation. But in other instances people have to really pray on it and see where God leads them. For some it works, and for some it doesn't.

Shimmie, you've made a lot of assumptions in your post, a lot, and they don't apply to me (and I suspect others) at all. Which is interesting because a lot of this thread has been about the assumptions the unsaved will make if they see a Christian in this situation. And just like in real life I'm seeing that it's always other Christians who jump to conclusions, not those who are unsaved.
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
I sure didnt feel no peace or LOVE :nono:

oh well :ohwell:

I'm hitting against a 'spirit' sweetie. Not you and it's not about you, and it started long before you posted. So this is not about you, personally.

You'll understand this one day. :yep:

Sometimes love must be tough. You can't back down for fear of what others think. :Rose:
 

Irresistible

New Member
Welp thank God he knows how to address our wounds and weakness and strengthen us

I certainly dont remember reading that he said we would/should have none
 
Last edited:

Irresistible

New Member
Irresistable... I think you know me far better than this. One day you're going to be tougher than me. :yep: I've been 'there' but I have something stronger to fight for and not against. The Church.
I do know you are loving Shimmie

I just aint feeling it right now:lachen:

but who is fighting against the Church here?

Shimmie , girl YOU HAVE NO CLUE the things I have WALKED through, no clue! I dont think its about 'toughness' I KNOW I've stood through hell and back

its just I am where I am and doing my best and I do love the LORD and there is nothing more anyone can add or take away from my heart or relationship with him, only he and I
 

Irresistible

New Member
I'm hitting against a 'spirit' sweetie. Not you and it's not about you, and it started long before you posted. So this is not about you, personally.

You'll understand this one day. :yep:

Sometimes love must be tough. You can't back down for fear of what others think. :Rose:
Ok Shimmie, I mean I do get your point like I said

I'm just gonna stop and thank God that I am aware of what I walked into and why and that God did deliver me/him/us

that right now is more than enough :flowers:
 

Irresistible

New Member
The thing is, I know this situation is not of my doing, but of God's. Why? Because He's giving me a testimony that I'm able to share with many many foster kids just like me. He's made a way out of no way just for me. He created this situation and is making sure that my sister and I get through it as shining examples of His love for us.

Was being in foster care a result of my decisions? No.
Was not having any family to turn to a result of my decisions? No.
Was not having any place to go upon turning 18 a result of my decisions? No.

And through all that God has provided a place for me to live and be comfortable. He's made it so that I can have a "home base" just like other people have, so that I can be successful in my education and everything else that He has set out for me to do.

All through my life I've lived with unrelated males. As a child, in foster care, in college, and even now. And guess what? It was the males who were supposed to be "family" (stepfathers, etc.) who had inappropriate lust for me and not anyone else.

Right now I live with a family who took me in when I turned 18. They didn't have to, but they did. According to you, that's a sin. And you know, that's ok. Because I know what God is doing in my life and I know that He's made it so that there isn't any appearance of wrongdoing. Even in college when I had no choice but to live with a group of friends (including males), He made it so that no one could look and say "that situation doesn't look right".

So as I said before, everyone's situation is different. The people involved have to go to God about their own circumstances. Clearly, "shacking" (living with a bf/gf) is wrong no matter the situation. But in other instances people have to really pray on it and see where God leads them. For some it works, and for some it doesn't.

Shimmie, you've made a lot of assumptions in your post, a lot, and they don't apply to me (and I suspect others) at all. Which is interesting because a lot of this thread has been about the assumptions the unsaved will make if they see a Christian in this situation. And just like in real life I'm seeing that it's always other Christians who jump to conclusions, not those who are unsaved.
Welp this does indeed sound like a blessing and testimony to me:yep:
 

Laela

Sidestepping the "lynch mob"
This is my last post in this thread because I don't believe in strife among us, Shimmie. :nono:

I understand what you first said.... actually I agree with a lot of what you've said. The Word itself can be an offense and I'm not offended one bit. But unless we're been charged by God to lead a flock, being a warrior for Christ and standing up for our beliefs and the Word doesn't give us authority over people's lives like that :nono: God doesn't need our help to be God.
We also can be faulty in our actions "correcting" those who are faulty in their thinking and there is where I had the problem. How constructive is that and how does that make us any more right?

God is a God of free will and even when we choose wrong, he will accept our choice. How this translates to people misleading others or not qualified to witness is excessive. I agree with who said we ought to just pray for their situation and leave it at that.

The "judge" not scripture was not to provide an excuse for living any kind of way or as a free pass or water down or whitewash. But it is greatly needed in this thread, because we're up in arms over ONE situation ...when there are many other situations/acts that are just as harmful, even among "real Christians". That was my point.

If we'd all agreed to pray the Christian woman mentioned by the OP finds herself in a situation that won't harm her walk with God, this would have more of an impact. The thread wouldn't have spiraled down to who is a Warrior for Christ and who isn't. Who can roar and who can't. Say, what? :laugh:

We are to separate ourselves from the World, not from others in the Body of Christ, so oftentimes how we treat one another carries more weight than who is right. To whom much is given, much is expected.
But we are ALL sinners saved by Grace.





Laela, we have to very careful with the use of the 'judge' not scripture. For far too many use it to as a free pass.

The lifestyle 'questioned' in this thread is a mess! It's already judged itself.

The faulty thinking is not seeing the dangers of this lifestyle. The faulty thinking is that it is deemed 'okay', by Christians. The faulty thinking is that it is exempt from judgement. The faulty thinking is that it doesn't matter how it 'looks', it's still okay. The faulty thinking is that God 'arranged' it and He approves of it.

With all of the problems that the Church has with promiscuity, why on earth would any Chrsitian think that they could lie on the railroad tracks of this lifestyle and dare not think that a train would not be coming full speek ahead, and run them over.

Faulty thinking.... and that's not a game to be played with.for it truly endangers the image of the Body of Christ. And we cannot dare to fault others for judging it for what it is. It's an enemy of our faith and those who hold this faith dearly have every single right to judge it and speak up about it. It's not up for defense.

You know, when you speak of the 'accuser', we' can't continue to play the victim, especially if we allow ourselves to approve of or be in situations which draws the wrong attention. The accuser isn't always wrong. We have to stop giving him the ammo to use against us.

Are we all of sudden waving a banner that says, "Christians drop your guard, for anything goes." Are we now taking in 'compromise' as our roommates? I hope not. For I choose to stand upon solid rock, not sinking sand. I'm not weakening my stand, and I will not succomb to the worn out 'judge not' theory.

Trust me, I'm not coming against you, personally. I am coming against an enemy who is out to weaken the Church with a lot of foolishness. I'm not falling for it. A very dear price was paid for me to partake of this gift of salvation, I've lived this life of faith long enough and I know better. I know the tricks and the excuses that 'we' as Christians use to Godidfy the choices we've made, and God is no where in it. The sooner we learn this the stronger we'll be as Christians and defeat the real judgers and accusers.

I'm not unaware of the fact that people get offended when I speak up and refuse to back down on certain subjects that seek approval. There's always 'something' that will pop up here in this forum, seeking approval for a free pass to be accepted by God and Christianity. If it's not abortion, it's gay marriage, the loa is always looking for ways to be in here; then it's something stupid like vampires, harry potter, and now roomataes of the opposite sex? And there are 3 things that come out trying to win sympathy and acceptance of these issues:

1. "Well I'm a Christian and I believe it's okay....."
2. " Judge not, least you be judged...."
3. " This is why I never come into the Christian Forum..."
.
Anyhooo....... :rolleyes:

What's going to happen is if we do not acknowledge the reality of our Faith and what it requires of us; if we don't do it now, then we will never survive what's coming. Excuses and judge nots won't save us.

All in peace ... :Rose:
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
The thing is, I know this situation is not of my doing, but of God's. Why? Because He's giving me a testimony that I'm able to share with many many foster kids just like me. He's made a way out of no way just for me. He created this situation and is making sure that my sister and I get through it as shining examples of His love for us.

Was being in foster care a result of my decisions? No.
Was not having any family to turn to a result of my decisions? No.
Was not having any place to go upon turning 18 a result of my decisions? No.

And through all that God has provided a place for me to live and be comfortable. He's made it so that I can have a "home base" just like other people have, so that I can be successful in my education and everything else that He has set out for me to do.

All through my life I've lived with unrelated males. As a child, in foster care, in college, and even now. And guess what? It was the males who were supposed to be "family" (stepfathers, etc.) who had inappropriate lust for me and not anyone else.

Right now I live with a family who took me in when I turned 18. They didn't have to, but they did. According to you, that's a sin. And you know, that's ok. Because I know what God is doing in my life and I know that He's made it so that there isn't any appearance of wrongdoing. Even in college when I had no choice but to live with a group of friends (including males), He made it so that no one could look and say "that situation doesn't look right".

So as I said before, everyone's situation is different. The people involved have to go to God about their own circumstances. Clearly, "shacking" (living with a bf/gf) is wrong no matter the situation. But in other instances people have to really pray on it and see where God leads them. For some it works, and for some it doesn't.

Shimmie, you've made a lot of assumptions in your post, a lot, and they don't apply to me (and I suspect others) at all. Which is interesting because a lot of this thread has been about the assumptions the unsaved will make if they see a Christian in this situation. And just like in real life I'm seeing that it's always other Christians who jump to conclusions, not those who are unsaved.
msa, don't play games.

You knew that this subject was about male/female roommates, not fosteer families. When you posted , you shared absolutely nothing about being a foster child. Here's your comment:

I currently still live with a man who is not related to me...

So don't play games. You're not going to get away with trying to 'appear' innocent'. You gave the full impression that you had a male roommate. That was your choice of words and choice of impression, not mine.

Your foster family situation as you are now explaining in detail has nothing to do with the subject being addressed in this thread. But you chose to put it out there as if it were.

I've made it very clear what I am addressing in this thread, which is non related, non family oriented male and female roommates. Don't make what I've shared into something that it is not. I never addressed anything related to family situations in this thread.

Stop trying to be so deceptive. :nono: You should have been up front from the very beginning. :rolleyes:
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
This is my last post in this thread because I don't believe in strife among us, Shimmie. :nono:

I understand what you first said.... actually I agree with a lot of what you've said. The Word itself can be an offense and I'm not offended one bit. But unless we're been charged by God to lead a flock, being a warrior for Christ and standing up for our beliefs and the Word doesn't give us authority over people's lives like that :nono: God doesn't need our help to be God.

We also can be faulty in our actions "correcting" those who are faulty in their thinking and there is where I had the problem. How constructive is that and how does that make us any more right?

God is a God of free will and even when we choose wrong, he will accept our choice. How this translates to people misleading others or not qualified to witness is excessive. I agree with who said we ought to just pray for their situation and leave it at that.

The "judge" not scripture was not to provide an excuse for living any kind of way or as a free pass or water down or whitewash. But it is greatly needed in this thread, because we're up in arms over ONE situation ...when there are many other situations/acts that are just as harmful, even among "real Christians". That was my point.

If we'd all agreed to pray the Christian woman mentioned by the OP finds herself in a situation that won't harm her walk with God, this would have more of an impact. The thread wouldn't have spiraled down to who is a Warrior for Christ and who isn't. Who can roar and who can't. Say, what? :laugh:

We are to separate ourselves from the World, not from others in the Body of Christ, so oftentimes how we treat one another carries more weight than who is right. To whom much is given, much is expected.
But we are ALL sinners saved by Grace.

Bye - Bye... :wave: Blessings. I'm not here for strife either. :Rose:
 

msa

New Member
msa, don't play games.

You knew that this subject was about male/female roommates, not fosteer families. When you posted , you shared absolutely nothing about being a foster child. Here's your comment:

I currently still live with a man who is not related to me...

So don't play games. You're not going to get away with trying to 'appear' innocent'. You gave the full impression that you had a male roommate. That was your choice of words and choice of impression, not mine.

Your foster family situation as you are now explaining in detail has nothing to do with the subject being addressed in this thread. But you chose to put it out there as if it were.

I've made it very clear what I am addressing in this thread, which is non related, non family oriented male and female roommates. Don't make what I've shared into something that it is not. I never addressed anything related to family situations in this thread.

Stop trying to be so deceptive. :nono: You should have been up front from the very beginning. :rolleyes:

First, you must have missed the part where I said...
I currently still live with a man who is not related to me. Am I sinning? Nope. I was lucky to have a family take me in when I had no other place to go.

Second, notice I said a family, not my family. So as far as the definition of a roommate, I live in a home with an unrelated male. If it's a sin, then it's a sin regardless of the circumstances right? He can have lust for me just like any other man since a man is a man right? And he's not family which would make that even more likely.

I wasn't trying to be deceptive (especially since most posters on this board know my situation). My point was you can't make an arbitrary ruling and not look at the facts and the context of the situation.

And like I said, in college I lived with unrelated males. Worked for me just fine especially since I had no other option. There was no sin it whatsoever.

Now maybe it'd be a sin for you or other people, but that doesn't make it so for everyone. And just because you don't think God is in a situation, doesn't make it true. You shouldn't speak with so much authority on where God is and what He's doing when you can't possibly know.
 
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