Need Spiritual Advice

[Blessedwithabundance14]

I am a mother of 3 girls and one boy. My oldest daughter is from a previous relationship. After the death of my dad and brother we had another girl which is how we have 3 girls. I now have an itch to try for one more boy so I can have more balance in my family and name him after my husband's father and my father. I have been praying asking the Lord for guidance because I want it to be His will and not mine. I have had all of my kids via c-section and do not want to put myself in a bad situation, so will speak with my OB/GYN before trying, but I still feel that my family is not complete.My mother and in-laws would probably be upset with is having another, but we can support them very well.

The question I am asking is how do you know when it is your desire and not the Lord's. I am not trying to get outside of His will and I have been praying about it. Any spiritual advice would be great. Thanks in advance ladies.

 

[Iwanthealthyhair67]

Not passing judgment at all just making an observation; it sounds like it is your desire, you want to bring balance and you want to give the child their grand fathers names, those are not exactly solid reasons for bringing a child into the world. Have you discussed it with your husband, why do you think you in laws will be upset?

However, your approach is right the right one first seeking what God wants for you and your family.

 

[momi]

The only spiritual advice I can offer is prayer and asking The Lord to reveal the true motives of your heart.

Having said that - I will offer my opinion. If your marriage is strong and you can afford another child I can't see any reason why you and your hubby shouldn't have another child. As long as you are aware that you have a 50% chance of having another boy and you sincerely believe another child would add to your family and not because you are attempting to fill a hole left by your loss. :Rose:

 

[Blessedwithabundance14]

Not passing judgment at all just making an observation; it sounds like it is your desire, you want to bring balance and you want to give the child their grand fathers names, those are not exactly solid reasons for bringing a child into the world. Have you discussed it with your husband, why do you think you in laws will be upset?

However, your approach is right the right one first seeking what God wants for you and your family.

Yes that is why I want to make sure it is the Lord's will. After my last child I felt done and then the desire came all of a sudden recently. I think my mother and sister-in law would be like...okay guys we thought you were done and now again. My husband is on the fence. He feels content with the 4, but has considered maybe...

Thanks for your response.

 

[Blessedwithabundance14]

The only spiritual advice I can offer is prayer and asking The Lord to reveal the true motives of your heart.

Having said that - I will offer my opinion. If your marriage is strong and you can afford another child I can't see any reason why you and your hubby shouldn't have another child. As long as you are aware that you have a 50% chance of having another boy and you sincerely believe another child would add to your family and not because you are attempting to fill a hole left by your loss. :Rose:

Maybe that is part of it..a hole since they are both gone. I always wanted 2 boys though. Thank you and I will seek the Lord in this decision. i have tried things out of his will and it did not end up well

 

[Iwanthealthyhair67]

Yes that is why I want to make sure it is the Lord's will. After my last child I felt done and then the desire came all of a sudden recently. I think my mother and sister-in law would be like...okay guys we thought you were done and now again. My husband is on the fence. He feels content with the 4, but has considered maybe...

Thanks for your response.

your welcome.

then my advice is similar to momi's, speak to your husband again, you don't want to do this if he is uncertain and both of you seek God's will on it, trust that he will make the way clear.

 

[Blessedwithabundance14]

your welcome.

then my advice is similar to momi's, speak to your husband again, you don't want to do this if he is uncertain and both of you seek God's will on it, trust that he will make the way clear.

Thank you so much!

 

[Blackpearl1993]

I don't believe that the desire for children within a marriage is wrong. God desires that marriages be fruitful (biologically or via adoption). I believe the desire for a child is God given (particularly so with people who already understand the sacrifices, responsibility, challenges, and joys of parenting). You and your husband would definitely already understand those things. You are doing the right thing in praying. God is the one who opens or closes the womb. So if it is within His will to bless you with another child, He most certainly will. I know many couples who thought they were done and God again blessed them one or more times despite their feelings. In every one of those cases, the parents could not imagine not having had that/those new little blessings. They are overjoyed for the precious life that God sent. Blessings to you and your family!

 

[felic1]

If you and your husband agree, all should be well. I think my mother only planned two children. She was not expecting another and my brother and I are 11 months apart. Fast forward, mother and dad are older and sick. Who arrived to care for them? God sent me to them. A desire for a family comes from the Lord. Be blessed.

 

[Blessedwithabundance14]

I don't believe that the desire for children within a marriage is wrong. God desires that marriages be fruitful (biologically or via adoption). I believe the desire for a child is God given (particularly so with people who already understand the sacrifices, responsibility, challenges, and joys of parenting). You and your husband would definitely already understand those things. You are doing the right thing in praying. God is the one who opens or closes the womb. So if it is within His will to bless you with another child, He most certainly will. I know many couples who thought they were done and God again blessed them one or more times despite their feelings. In every one of those cases, the parents could not imagine not having had that/those new little blessings. They are overjoyed for the precious life that God sent. Blessings to you and your family!

Thank you so much for your encouragement! I truly appreciate that and definitely have the feeling to add another to mummy family, but first seek his will. Thank you

 

[Blessedwithabundance14]

If you and your husband agree, all should be well. I think my mother only planned two children. She was not expecting another and my brother and I are 11 months apart. Fast forward, mother and dad are older and sick. Who arrived to care for them? God sent me to them. A desire for a family comes from the Lord. Be blessed.

Thank you for your kind words I feel like I could cry tears of joy from hearing from you wonderful ladies! Thank you!

 

[Shimmie]

Wishing you all of God's Best.