Seriously considering ending my transition..

UGQueen

UGQueen

Active Member
Ok ladies,

This is the deal,
Ive been transitioning for a little over six months (six months and two weeks to be exact) and its getting more and more difficult.

It was a breeze when i had my sew ins etc because I didnt actually have to deal with my hair. I would walk around telling people that my transition was easy, all the while being in a sew in (obv it was going to be easy).

Well i took out my sew in on thursday and I really want to put it back in because this is ridiculous.

These are my reasons, numbered.

1. My hair is shedding all over the place, ive done garlic treatments left and right although it helps its only temporary,

2. it is literally IMPOSSIBLE to detangle, i used 3/4 of my brand new Vo5 when i was in the shower this morning. NOTHING i have at home gives me enough slip. LITERALLY NOTHING

3. I find that my styles have become more limited, all my hair can go in is a low bun,
when i was in my sew ins i would go out to party and my hair would revert by the end of the night having me looking a HOT mess

4. Everyone that knows me know that I baby my hair, i treat it like its gold.
But now my hair is breaking off left right and center and to make matters worse after detangling in the shower etc i put my hair into a loose bun and i looked in the mirror and saw a piece of hair sticking up.
so my hair is litterally big chopping itself!

an inch or so of hair just appeared from no where, no relaxed hair on the bottom of it either, and this is going on all over my head, i can see little pieces everywhere, :wallbash::wallbash::wallbash::wallbash:

effinhair.jpg

it was literally sticking up just like the when i found it, mind you all mny hair was laying flat pulled back.

I have no plans on doing a BC but i feel like my hair is getting worse and worse, and IMO my hair has never been unhealthy (i just didnt treat it as good as i do now). I feel like this transition is taking a toll on my hair

This might be the end of my transition, im giving myself this week to think about it.. we will see

*sigh*:cry2:

any and all opinions are appreciated.
 
Sorry girlie ((hugs))

I dont this Vo5 is good with detangling and I dont think its a good idea to detangle in the shower. Have you tried taking garlic pills?
 
The last couple of days my non-relaxed edges were sticking out and felt so dry and brittle. I wanted to go buy a relaxer and relax "just the edges" but then I remembered my long-term goal. Got under the shower, washed them with Kerastase Bain de Force and put on Inecto Coconut Oil Conditioner. My 4a/b hair looks and feel very soft and manageable. Don't give up yet maybe you just haven't found the products that work for your hair..
 
I've recently purchased some detangling combs that have really helped with the new growth. Although I'm not in transition, these combs have allowed me to work through the matted/tangled hair with a lot more ease then before. As a result, I feel like I can extend my stretch much longer.

One of the combs I purchased at Walmart/Sally's for under $3.00. The other comb was the Ouidad detangler for $24.00. They all work marvelously. I did a video review here in case you were interested.
 
you just need some tough love.

if you can't manage your hair and you've only been out of a weave for a few days, how do you expect to be able to take care of your hair when it's natural? there is a learning curve to transitioning/natural hair, and you haven't mastered it because you've been hiding your hair. get some thicker conditioner, get out of the shower so it can marinate for a while, then get back in and try it again.
 
IMO: (As a relaxed head) -- You can also have Long, Beautiful, Healthy, Relaxed Hair. :yep:

And now that you know how to Properly Care for (Treat Your Hair, as you put it), it should be a Breeze.

You have alot of Relaxed Heads here that are willing to help you achieve your Goals, but whatever you decide, We ALL SUPPORT YOU in your Decision.:grouphug:

Either way, you can always transition again. Some people attempt to transition more than once before they make their Final Transition.

Stay Encouraged.:hug2:
 
It's pure hell for me to detangle in the shower. I had to detangle before I got in the shower and yes my hair was usually dry. That's what worked for me though. My hair is super thick and detangling in the shower had me loosing more hair then when I detangled prior.

I had to step outside the box on a lot of "tips" I received because they just didn't work for my hair. What other conditioners have you tried? Research some good slip conditioners on here and go through the trial and error.

I say don't give up on your transition. I did a few years ago and I regretted it dearly. I'm now fully natural and I transitioned for over a year. I had to do a lot of buns (boring) but it got me through.
 
Ok i'm almost at my 1 year mark and I feel ya...I've gone thru sooo many frustrations with my transitioning hair...putting neutragena triple moisture on my hair and leaving it in a shower cap for 2-3 hours really helps me detangle. Also using a wide-tooth comb. I think I've also realized flat ironing my hair every other week--YES flat ironing--helps me manage this transition. I've recently discovered washing, DC, flatironing, and nightly bagging seems to keep me sane and my hair free of single strand knots, moisturized, and presentable.
 
Sometimes it takes a CHANGE in the TYPES of CONDItiONERS you use. For me Praital Silk Worm Rinse, Generic Matrix Biolage Balm , Generic Nexxus Humectress and Suave Almond and Shea are all working. I've found that natural oils and butters help ,along with MSM , Biotin, Flax Seed and Silica supplements. I also use Afro Detangler. Just a few thoughts. U don't have to buy any of these! Maybe you have some things lying around that are similar that will work. Good luck!
 
I agree with many of the poster's above. Do what makes you happy.

If relaxing your hair is what you are most comfortable with, what fits your lifestyle the best, or what you most enjoy, than congrats on such a great stretch!

If you want to be natural, than you can either continue your transition with weave, or you can take the time to figure out what your hair needs to thrive.

Good luck!
 
Your hair is screaming to be cut. You said it was big chopping itself. Help it complete it's mission! Your coilies are so cute!!
 
When was the last time you did a hard protein treatment? What are you using as a moisture DC? My last stretch was 1 week shy of 7 months and IMO (whether you decide to relax or keep transitioning) you need to really get your breakage in check. Co-washing most likely won't be enough...good luck in your decision!
 
Why do you want to go back to natural hair?

If relaxing is still an option for you, maybe you're just not ready to rock your natural texture....?

-------------------

My advice - try a different conditioner, also are you using vo5 moisture milks or another type? other v05s dont work for me w/ slippiness as well as moisturemilks do. Are you DCing on the reg?

part your hair in 4 or six and go thru each section with a wide tooth comb from tip to root. and have patience! month 7-9 were rough for me too, but you get through it.

It really takes time to learn what your hair likes and trials of different products/styles/techniques ....

Maybe you should put your hair in another sew in or in braids for a while since you're not ready to BC
 
keep in mind that when the seasons change people will often shed more...I know I do. in terms of poo,condish , hard core moisture/ protein maybe what the other ladies are satting about a change in product may suffice. how long is your hair at this point? maybe if its longer washing in braids my help. as a last resort cut off your relaxed hair before considering going back to relaxing. remmeber that most of us have had relaxed hair since we were small and transitioning/ natural hair and learning what it likes or needs can take years to get the hang of, i've just learned in the last 1-2 yrs and adding things to my reggie like hardcore protein, sealing and mositurizing and washing in braids have made a huge difference for me as a natural. sorry you're going through this :(
 
OP, are you sure that those curls sticking up are breakage? Couldn't they be just new hair? Also, if you have issues detangling you need to use a product that is specifically a detangler. I read so many posts with ladies upset because their conditioners don't detangle or provide slip. That's what "Detanglers" are for. I like the FX brand personally.
 
UGQueen said:
Ok ladies,

This is the deal,
Ive been transitioning for a little over six months (six months and two weeks to be exact) and its getting more and more difficult.

It was a breeze when i had my sew ins etc because I didnt actually have to deal with my hair. I would walk around telling people that my transition was easy, all the while being in a sew in (obv it was going to be easy).

Well i took out my sew in on thursday and I really want to put it back in because this is ridiculous.

These are my reasons, numbered.

1. My hair is shedding all over the place, ive done garlic treatments left and right although it helps its only temporary,

2. it is literally IMPOSSIBLE to detangle, i used 3/4 of my brand new Vo5 when i was in the shower this morning. NOTHING i have at home gives me enough slip. LITERALLY NOTHING

3. I find that my styles have become more limited, all my hair can go in is a low bun,
when i was in my sew ins i would go out to party and my hair would revert by the end of the night having me looking a HOT mess

4. Everyone that knows me know that I baby my hair, i treat it like its gold.
But now my hair is breaking off left right and center and to make matters worse after detangling in the shower etc i put my hair into a loose bun and i looked in the mirror and saw a piece of hair sticking up.
so my hair is litterally big chopping itself!

an inch or so of hair just appeared from no where, no relaxed hair on the bottom of it either, and this is going on all over my head, i can see little pieces everywhere, :wallbash::wallbash::wallbash::wallbash:

effinhair.jpg

it was literally sticking up just like the when i found it, mind you all mny hair was laying flat pulled back.

I have no plans on doing a BC but i feel like my hair is getting worse and worse, and IMO my hair has never been unhealthy (i just didnt treat it as good as i do now). I feel like this transition is taking a toll on my hair

This might be the end of my transition, im giving myself this week to think about it.. we will see

*sigh*:cry2:

any and all opinions are appreciated.
Click to expand...

Nej, sluta inte, ge inte upp!!!!

That said it took me 3 attemps to go all the way (I usually crack at 7 months). I think some coconut oil and a good conditioner could be your answer, though. Yes, it does take a toll on the relaxed hair, I guess you have to be sure that you want to be natural and not really mourn the relaxed hair.

When I was transitioning I was losing a lot of hair but now, almost nothing, I don't seem to have a lot of shed hair either. And it is so nice not to have NG anymore, now everyting growing out of my head is soft, strong and oh so welcome..

Lycka till med vad du än bestämmer!
Det är ju ditt huvud och du kanske bara inte är redo ännu....
 
Also, maybe try texlaxing for a while. That way when/if you try going natural again it won't be such a shock to your strands.
 
i wore quick weaves and sew ins for 14mnths after my big chop.

every time i had to take them down there was a lot of shedding. but this is bcuz i wasnt able to comb my real hair every day. your hair sheds at least 100 strands a day on its own. so wht u cld be seeing is all of them coming out the day u took your sew in down.

also, may i ask if u cut the strings or did u have help? do u think u cld have been snipping pieces of your braid when u were trying to cut the threads of the sew in? thats happen to me and also my siser once b4.

a detangling shampoo like Creme of Nature would have given u more slip than the V05 would have. also Cholesterol Conditioning Cremes would have also softened it as well.

so now maybe another sew in would help in the meantime?? if ur not ready to Big Chop yet?
 
No one wants to sacrifice hair - It is not acceptable to see broken hairs, or else it would not be considered a transition, she would have simply cut all her hair off.

If the products you are using are not helping, perhaps you could try a different, inexpensive product - leave it in on dry hair for an extended period of time, then after that - detangle. Please make sure this product has both protein and moisture - say: Optimum anti-breakage line. Detangle the relaxed hair and then leave it alone for say another hour - giving yourself time to rest. Then go back and attempt to detangle your natural roots - only 20 minutes at a time with 10 minutes of rest. With each section detangled, Place a rubberband (no damage by goody's) on the section, twist down the length of the hair and place a barrett on the end.

Then shampoo - with the hair fully banded, using the optimum no breakage shampoo, or another low sulfate (Tresemme naturals - or even their anti-breakage shampoo). Do not use a deep conditioner at this point. Just rinse very well for an extended time and then apply a spray on leave in.

I truly hope this helps you until you find your way.
 
Last edited:
hey ladies thanks for all the imput,

i DC my hair very often so i dont think that is the issue,
im going to try some other cond and see what happens,
i just finish my big bottle of Nexxus Humectress and that didnt seam to do any good.

do u guys have any suggestions on cond that give some really good slip?
 
What has helped my transition is that I have started to treat all of my hair as if it were natural and therefore had to find a completely new regimen. I also use thick, heavy, natural/organic moisturizing products and techniques for natural heads. At first I was having a huge problem with breaking and shedding, but it has gotten much better. BTW I am almost 8 months post
 
You have to keep that demarcation line strong. The two textures are competing.

Do an intense protein treatment. If you do not have anything strong laying around, grab a reconstructor and add an egg to it. And then follow it with a moisture treatment, preferably under heat. If you need more slip, add some honey, molasses, oils, yogurt, or coconut milk. Heat up the concoction in the microwave, or sit under heat.

Saturate your hair with this and take your time. Try to detangle with you finger tips first before taking a comb to it. The end of a rat tail comb is usually a God send.

Finish it off with a rinse. French Perm Stabilizer Plus, Roux Porosity Control, and Dominican Rinses are great to finish it off or apply right before the DC process.
 
daydreem2876 said:
What has helped my transition is that I have started to treat all of my hair as if it were natural and therefore had to find a completely new regimen. I also use thick, heavy, natural/organic moisturizing products and techniques for natural heads. At first I was having a huge problem with breaking and shedding, but it has gotten much better. BTW I am almost 8 months post
Click to expand...


yeah i should consider switching up my regimen completely,
i started using HairOne and my new growth seams to really like it,

hmm i guess i should start looking through the regimen of the natural haired ladies on here and see if that works.
 
Wow! I'd hate to stretch this long and have to give it up due to breakage.

You might have to just BC to save your hair. Braids? Cornrows?
 
UGQueen said:
hey ladies thanks for all the imput,

i DC my hair very often so i dont think that is the issue,
im going to try some other cond and see what happens,
i just finish my big bottle of Nexxus Humectress and that didnt seam to do any good.

do u guys have any suggestions on cond that give some really good slip?
Click to expand...


Have you tried Aussie Moist? It has good slip. I used to detangle with this under the shower. And I also use a seamless comb. I bc'd today at 6 months post because my hair was doing the sane as yours. Now my hair is thanking me for it.
 
ORS Replenishing Pak/Conditioner?

That can still cut through my hair at 4 months post. Gettin' thick but its cuttin' it for the time being. I'mma have to get something else soon too.
 
Have you ever tried Nutress Protein Pack? It costs about a $1.50 at Sally's. That stuff will get the hair really fortified. But I always follow with a creamy moisture condish.
 
Suave Humectant is awesome. It's afordable and convenient. I'm 4 months post. The only other conditioner that helps is ORS replenishing packets.

Also, now that I have so much new growth and with such tough, dry hair I leave my deep conditioners on for extended periods of time. Sometimes I DC overnight.
Penetrating oils such as Olive Oil, especially coconut oil decrease my detangling time when my hair dries. I apply to my new growth and it immediately softens.

Also, when I saw the pic of the coils sticking up I had a flashback to when I first began stretching. I was deep conditioning with a moisturizing conditioner instead of a protein based conditioner.My relaxed hair disappeared in spots where I had no implications of problems. There were small areas of just new growth.
 
I think you are just freaking out now. It has been less than a week. Just understand that crazy people like us who transition instead of chopping will be prone to breakage and shed hair b/c of the two textures.

For me I have damaged relaxed ends from my overprocessed relaxer (my LAST!!!). I would deep condition and take your time detangling. Weave it back up if that is working for you!
 
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