What if you never had long hair as a child?

[softblackcotton]

I was wondering if there are any longer than APL ladies on this forum who have never had long hair as children.

I have 4b hair that has never been longer than a few inches past SL my entire life, relaxed or natural. My texture is very dense with fine/med strands. Been struggling with my natural hair journey going on 13 years and I still can't get past a few inches beyond SL.
I am starting to wonder if I am one of those rare people with an extremely short terminal length, because neither has my mom who has been natural 6 years. Maybe just beyond shoulder length is in our genes and I should just stop trying for long hair?

So if your hair is longer than APL now how long was it when you were a girl?

What is your hair type?

Have any of your immediate family members (sister, mom) had long hair?

 

[WantNatural]

I never had long hair as a child. I honestly couldn't tell you the longest it ever was, definitely shoulder length, but I was never one of those little girls with BSL or WL hair or anything. I've never seen my mom with long hair, although it used to be incredibly thick. Both of my sisters may have reached APL at one time, but right now my older sister's hair is shoulder length, and her hair is thin and fine.

My hair is currently almost BSB at it's longest layer, and this is the longest my hair has ever been. To be honest, I never really cared about long hair before, and whenever my hair reached shoulder length I would always clip it up out of my way and usually end up cutting it. To me hair was just hair - it grows back, so I never thought twice about cutting. I have no idea how long it would have grown before coming to LHCF if I had actually let it grow. And now I have this bug for HL, maybe even TBL, which I would never have guessed I wanted a few years ago. And I have no doubt I'll reach it.

My curl pattern is mostly 4a with some 3c. I have mostly thick strands, medium density, normal porosity. My hair demands attention - I can't leave it alone and expect to have hair down my back. I have to take very specific care of it for it to thrive. And that's okay - now that we understand each other I expect to reach long lengths.

Don't be discouraged OP. You CAN grow and retain long hair. What is your regimen? Have you been consistent with it? What is your retention regimen?

 

[charmtreese]

As a child my hair never got any longer than an inch or two past SL. I Grew my relaxed hair to BSL (my fotki documents that journey). I've been natural for a little over a year, and now I'm at SL. My hair does not grow fast nor is it über thick, I just pay close attention to its needs, use products that work for my hair (regardless if they are PC in the hair world or not), and stay focused.

 

[Aireen]

I hope this question isn't for naturals only. If it is... disregard this.

So if your hair is longer than APL now how long was it when you were a girl?
My hair was natural until about 12, it was longer than NL but a bit shorter than SL. My hair is BSB now and the longest it's ever been was MBL/WL.

What is your hair type?
4a, relaxed.

Have any of your immediate family members (sister, mom) had long hair?
Just my mum.

 

[softblackcotton]

I never had long hair as a child. I honestly couldn't tell you the longest it ever was, definitely shoulder length, but I was never one of those little girls with BSL or WL hair or anything. I've never seen my mom with long hair, although it used to be incredibly thick. Both of my sisters may have reached APL at one time, but right now my older sister's hair is shoulder length, and her hair is thin and fine.

My hair is currently almost BSB at it's longest layer, and this is the longest my hair has ever been. To be honest, I never really cared about long hair before, and whenever my hair reached shoulder length I would always clip it up out of my way and usually end up cutting it. To me hair was just hair - it grows back, so I never thought twice about cutting. I have no idea how long it would have grown before coming to LHCF if I had actually let it grow. And now I have this bug for HL, maybe even TBL, which I would never have guessed I wanted a few years ago. And I have no doubt I'll reach it.

My curl pattern is mostly 4a with some 3c. I have mostly thick strands, medium density, normal porosity. My hair demands attention - I can't leave it alone and expect to have hair down my back. I have to take very specific care of it for it to thrive. And that's okay - now that we understand each other I expect to reach long lengths.

Don't be discouraged OP. You CAN grow and retain long hair. What is your regimen? Have you been consistent with it? What is your retention regimen?

Your story is pretty encouraging but your hair type is inherently stronger than mine. My rentention regimen has been primarily braid and twist extensions. I think most of my life has been spent in braid/twist extentions. This year Ive been I'm braids basically the entire time. I kept them moisturized and my scalp clean. Have just started trimming my ends and finger detangling for the first time in my life this year. I have experienced much less breakage but only 1 inch and half of growth from Jan to now.

 

[greenandchic]

My Hair Then
My hair never got past APL as a kid. APL was LONG to us. Many times I had the longest hair in the class (lots of Jheri Curl kids with breaking hair) until a waist length "good haired" girl came in. At that point my fame was over.

I only cut it short once in my teens (Halle Berry cut of the 90s) and it quickly grew back when I stopped cutting it, but never past a certain length. My hair was still pressed with that style believe it or not and I got it done weekly. When it grew out, it was stuck at APL.

Family
My mother always cut her hair. In the 70s, it was about APL 4b and pressed. After she had me in the late 70s, she started wearing it short and pressed (Weezy Jefferson style). Even now that she keep her locks in a short, neck length bob - very cute.

I have a half sister, but don't know much about her hair.

Out of all of my family, I have only one full-blood aunt (she shares the same parents with my mom) and she had waist length hair at one time. I remember it was a HAM, but she babied her hair until she got sick of it and cut it to her shoulders. My great-grandmother had waist length hair as well. I only know it from her photos since she passed away before I was born.

My Hair Now
My hair is currently MBL and it took me over a year to get there from BSL and its still an exaggerated U shape.

I really had to learn what really works for my hair and sitting around and watching it grow isn't it. For me, long hair is work: DC, treatments to help with porosity (henna, protein, vitamin b, etc), dusting, moisturizing, sealing, washing it often and so on.

3c and 4a
Porous
Medium to fine strands

 

[Phoenixsky13]

I had terrible hair as a child. I literally had no hair in the back lol. The longest my hair ever got was shoulder length in high school from repeatedly wearing crochet braids for a year.

My hair is 4a/4b I'm natural now and touching bsl at my last length check. My moms hair is silky 2b/3a, she never knew what to do with my hair which is probably why I was almost bald. My sisters both have Apl hair with minimal effort. I think they are in the 3c/4a/4b range but their hair is much thicker and coarser than mine. My hair is more fine and cottony if that makes sense.

 

[ChocolatePie777]

You may need to just reevaluate your reggie vs what your hair is really telling you......I think your just doing SOMETHING wrong

 

[Atdow71]

As a child I never had long hair. It was washed, my scalp was greased and the majority of the time it was in cornrows. I didn't get a relaxer till 9th grade because I was tired of being teased for having short hair & I thought that it would grow my hair lol.

In 10th grade, I got a jherri curl (it was the 80s). It made my hair grow to bsb, but I always kept it short.

THe only thing that made my hair grow to unimaginable Lengths were locs, and they grew to my waist. I decided to cut them because I want to prove to myself & others that my loose natural hair can grow.

The majority of my hair is 4b, with a small patch of I don't know what texture. It's straigtr than the rest of my hair, and when in twists, if wet they come out.

ETA: growing up I couldn't get my hair into a decent pony tail.
I never saw my mother w/ a relaxer, her hair was baby soft - loke cotton. My siblings, had full shoulder length hair.

 

[4evershika]

So if your hair is longer than APL now how long was it when you were a girl?
My hair is past APL and the longest it had been as a child was neck length... I remember that I used to just want my hair to touch my shirt in the back! My hair was natural until age 8 at which point my mom relaxed it.

What is your hair type?
4b and beyond relaxed (see the attached picture of my NG with conditioner on it)

Have any of your immediate family members (sister, mom) had long hair?
Nope. All the women in my family have short hair. My grandmother is "mixed" and even her hair wouldn't go longer than SL-ish.

(Are you relaxed or natural?)

 

[empressri]

No idea how long my hair was as a kid, because it was always in braids. Eh, something like to my shoulders? I'm going by how my mother did my hair on wash day. The braids always hung to my shoulders.

And high school....didn't even get to BSL.

It wasn't until I went natural and then did my own hair that it got long and retained length.

 

[MzSwift]

This is the longest my hair has ever been and I plan to keep on GROWING!!
Once I got over my fear of water, my hair took off. I water it daily and sometimes twice a day.

Check out Yassylane's fotki for inspiration. She's a 4B who grew to WL with a super simple regi. She's the one who inspired me back in 2009. She even posted a picture of her hair as a child, for the doubters.

http://public.fotki.com/yassylane/

Hope this enourages you!

 

[Haddasah]

So if your hair is longer than APL now how long was it when you were a girl?

I am a little past bra-strap length now, as a child my hair was all types of wrong. It never grew past the TOP of my ears...never. My ends were disgusting too. I started researching how to care for my hair and my hair grew to past APL, I was relaxed then. I cut if off and grew it past BSL as a natural and I'm headed to WSL hopefully in 1 yr.

What is your hair type?

I have type 4 hair

Have any of your immediate family members (sister, mom) had long hair?

My sister hair as a girl was shorter then mine, like literally 2-3inches in length, now after learning proper methods her hair is APL, her goal is full APL. My mom had thick, full SL hair...just gorgeous. She doesn't like her hair on her back but I heard she had long hair as a child.

 

[SEMO]

No idea how long my hair was as a kid, because it was always in braids. Eh, something like to my shoulders? I'm going by how my mother did my hair on wash day. The braids always hung to my shoulders.

And high school....didn't even get to BSL.

It wasn't until I went natural and then did my own hair that it got long and retained length.

Ditto.

My mom kept my hair in french braids and they hung around neck length or maybe shoulder length. Once, I was relaxed (6th grade) my hair stayed around shoulder length. I maybe reached APL by college, right before going natural.

 

[IMFOCSD]

Hi...so my hair is full APL now but it's the longest ever. As a child my hair was short (ear or shorter) and damaged/broken. Off ...as I hit my teens it became healthy but still did not reach SL(I was a salon head). I finally reached SL over a year ago.

I am relaxed/texlaxed 4a/b.

Sent from my T-Mobile myTouch Q using LHCF

 

[WantNatural]

Your story is pretty encouraging but your hair type is inherently stronger than mine. My rentention regimen has been primarily braid and twist extensions. I think most of my life has been spent in braid/twist extentions. This year Ive been I'm braids basically the entire time. I kept them moisturized and my scalp clean. Have just started trimming my ends and finger detangling for the first time in my life this year. I have experienced much less breakage but only 1 inch and half of growth from Jan to now.

That very well may be the case, since you have fine strands and mine are thick. My strands may be thick, but they have a fine strand mentality - I still can't do any and everything I want to it for fear that it will break off and act a straight up fool.

There are ladies that stopped relaxing around the same time I did and BC'd around the same time I did, and have hair approaching or at WL already. I'm still trying to get that last inch or so for BSB. We should never compare our hair to others - there are just too many factors that determine our growth and retention. But I could say their hair is inherently stronger than mine, but I think the reason why they have seen the success with their hair, and why many who have posted here tonight have seen success, is because they found what their hair liked and they kept doing it, consistently. I tend to get bored, hair lazy, and go long stretches doing the bare minimum, which affects my retention. I'm not a guru or anything, but I'm wondering, if you've always been around shoulder length and spent a majority of your life in braid extensions, if maybe braid extensions don't work for your hair? I personally cannot braid my hair, way too much breakage. I can twist just fine, but braiding happens very very rarely. Maybe it's time to find something different that your hair does like and will allow it to thrive.

But no matter what I refuse to believe that SL is your terminal length. I do believe that your hair can grow longer than that.

 

[abcd09]

My hair never got past mid neck length stretched as a kid. I was natural until 9th grade. My natural hair was always in plaits, very fine, and the ends would tangle together all the time. I reached bsl with a relaxer but only for a month.. my ends are really something else. Back then we did not dc, and we did not use the right products. I never had heat, but my hair was combed and brushed and redone every morning because I would get frzzies due to the fineness. Also I think fine hair is prone to multiple set backs. I know I've had many in a few years time, no matter what I do.

 

[Vintagecoilylocks]

So if your hair is longer than APL now how long was it when you were a girl?
My hair was natural until about 18, it was longer than NL but a bit shorter than SL. My hair is between just below hip and Classic due to layers now and the longest it's ever been. I made it to BSL 20 years ago when I finally grew out the relaxer. But that was probably only the rear back area. That was a surprise but I thought back on that time when I started my hair journey as to what I was doing that gave me those results. It was water, no heat, and very little manipulation, protective styling. NOt planned it was just where I was living and a very very busy life.

What is your hair type?
3c lower rear, 4a, dry fine.

Have any of your immediate family members (sister, mom) had long hair?
No. My mum never had hair longer than ear length. Though my sister has 2c, 3abc, It is fine and has never been longer than just below shoulder. I was told by my father that his grandmother had a thick braid down her back. But it is very relative as to what he considered "down her back".

 

[NappyNelle]

So if your hair is longer than APL now how long was it when you were a girl?

I am MBL now; the longest my hair has ever been. As a child, the longest my hair ever got was 1 or 2in past SL. It was very thin, dry, and prone to breakage.

What is your hair type?

4A

Have any of your immediate family members (sister, mom) had long hair?

My mom had full CBL hair, but then started having issues with it. She was relaxed and colored at the time.

 

[Nonie]

So if your hair is longer than APL now how long was it when you were a girl?

When my mom cared for my hair, I made it to about 6 inches. When I was left to my own devices as a teen, my hair had to be chopped off to a fade and then the most it ever grew to was 3-4 inches while I was in school where braiding was not allowed. Combing it out daily while dry (as I didn't know better) meant breakage galore and a TWA was all I knew. That was until I got a jheri curl, then I made it to 5-6 inches. Over processing lead to breakage so after high school I wore braids--which I always did whenever I started to have issues with my hair. I would just let the relaxed hair break off on its own as I ignored my hair in braids. Then got a relaxer thinking that straighter hair would be easier to grow long as there'd be not coils for the comb to catch in. But I still only made it this length:

What is your hair type?
4B Fine

Have any of your immediate family members (sister, mom) had long hair?

Well, my mom and bro have only had the length I used to call my longest (5-6 inches). My sis might have had a little longer than that. I'm the first in the family to have hair past APL. Low manipulation and regular dusting have been the secret to my success.


OP, this thread has more stories along these lines: http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=449594

 

[TootiePie]

I never passed SL a child, my longest layer is BSL now. 3c/4a.

 

[~~HoneyComb~~]

Shoulder length or just a hair past was as long as my hair got as a child and young adult.

It wasn't until I became natural that I was able to retain length and grow my hair to WL stretched. I recently cut it to APL stretched (which is still longer than what it was when I was younger).

My mom and sister both had WL hair at points in their lives, but cut it at some point.

My hair is 3c/4a.

 

[Lucie]

I was BSL-MBL as a child. I am a 4a. My mom was SL-WL. It depends on how scissor-happy she got. Both sides of my family have long hair.

 

[NowIAmNappy]

My hair never made it past shoulder length as a child up until 22 when I decided to go natural. My hair at my longest since being natural was in between MBL and waist length. For me it was about completely changing my regimen, which meant adding protein and trimming regularly. I am also 4b with fine to medium strands. My sister has long hair but she also has a 3b/C texture so I dont compare her hair retention to mine because even with a relaxer she always had long hair.

 

[southerncitygirl]

softblackcotton

As a child i never made it past shoulder length and my mother just ripped through it and it was dry. As a young adult it started to creep towards apl because i had a great stylist but then i relocated to nyc and in 3 months time a domincan salon burnt my hair to a crisp and i had to cut off 5-7 inches which led to me transitioning.

My hair type is cottony and 3c/4a. I trim regularly about every 3 months and stick with styles that are low or no manipulation. I also moisturize and seal several times a week and deep condition even more so in the fall and winter. Washing and detangling in sections also is key and i am now bsl.

My mother has never really had long hair.....in fact when she has gotten length it was stringy,limp and lifeless cause its naturally very thin/fine. She's a silky 3c that has never had good hair practices compounded with the fact that she has high blood pressure and diabetes which also makes her hair a little thinner. My moms sisters have 3a/b and 4a hair and as a kid i briefly remember them having at least apl to bsl hair but they keep it cut much shorter these days.

You can do this, with fine strands your hair needs to be left alone...no/low manipulation is key for you as well as regular dusting, moisturizing and sealing.


I have had many setbacks on my hair journey and i just keep on going!

 

[southerncitygirl]

softblackcotton

please tell us about your reggie & styling methods as well as what products you use. maybe there is something missing or taking away from your hairs health. you may not see it but we could give you guidance.

 

[itismehmmkay]

My hair has never really been shoulder length. Maybe, but if it was, it looked thin and I would cut it off. And I've always wanted it long and never thought of "oh it's just hair". I would tho just opt for a decent style instead of scraggly hair.

I do believe I can grow it long though and it does grow well. It's jsut been my retention efforts that were not good. I mean, I have always cut my hair regularly up to a ear-length bob. I just have hair that needs different stuff. Like I can't just do any ole thing to it and have any ole person do anything to it. When I was younger, my mom would press my hair, but I now know she was probably pressing it too thin...meaning, it would stretch out too much and probably break. And then my pontails would be tight as hell. Then I'd mess with it. Then when I did get a relaxer...it was all the way overprocessed. Then when salon folks did my hair, it was overprocessing and too never really had the money to truly stick with something who was going to grow my hair.

These days I finally think I know what I'm doing lol. I know how to relax it where it's not overprocessed and doesn't look thin. And I know how to keep heat down to a minimum. Those are the main things really. That relaxed part took a long time. Cause like I said, it would always look thin and flat and then I'd just cut it. Anyway, I'm still overcoming some recent haircuts, but like I said I now know what I'm doing and it's coming along.

 

[Misseyl]

Never had long hair has a child but I have an hair obsession that started a long time ago. I remember when the Mane & Tail brand came out, it was all the rave. When Wanakee came out, I bought all her products and read her phamplet on growing hair but nothing happened. It wasn't until 2003 when I went online looking for something for my hair that my hair started to show some promise. I found a hairsite that only talk hair. I learn that by stretching, moisturizing and condition consistently my will finally thank me. I just came off a 2 1/2 year stretch and have decided to start texlaxing instead of bone straight. This might be one of the best decisions I've ever made. In another 8 months I'll see if this decison pays off.

 

[yodie]

softblackcotton
I share the same story, except my hair has never completely been shoulder length. It pretty much stays the length in my avatar. I too have been struggling for years, aiming in the dark and wondering if this is my terminal length.

My hair is like cotton and very much prone to splits. 4a/b. Any minor experiment is a setback.

I always used to say, but I never knew it to be true until now - My hair likes to be left alone. I've tried way too many products, styles, and things that worked for people with other textures.

The one 'season' in my life where my hair did well was when my stylist (every 2 weeks) used a combo conditioner that combined moisture and protein. I never really got the importance of that until I got a hair analysis and they stressed that my fine strands need protein before I use heat appliances.

I don't have a major regimen, but here's where I am now. So, ladies that have been where I am and have gone to greater lengths, advice please.

I'm in the process of moving. The great stylist that I found, well, I have to end that new relationship. He had great hair care practices, but he said I didn't need regular protein treatments. (I did them every two weeks before I went to him).

Right now I wash, dc w/ moisture/protein, blow dry, and pin it up.

Shampoo - stylist uses his own, but I like non sulfate or Design Essentials moisture retention.

I'm looking into getting a cysteine treatment to cut down on frizz.

DC - Joico moisture recovery. Love it!
Sorry so long.

 

[Evolving78]

i had barely shoulder length hair as a child. my hair is 4a and very fine. my mother was more into style than health. i didn't really start getting into hair care until i became an adult. when i started going to a stylist regularly my reached APL. then i decided to cut it all off for a change. i have been going back and forth for the past 7-8 years doing big chops, going natural, loc'ing, etc.... now i am going for length again as a relaxed head. i am past APL and i did it all on my own.

my family always thought i was just one of those people who could never have long hair. well my big goal is to make to MBL this coming year. once i get there, my hair will be the longest it has ever been in my generation (blood related) WL is the ultimate goal.

over the years, i learned and i'm still learning what works for my hair. if i want to grow it long, it can't take abuse like my hair being short can. this is my first time with relaxed hair, really focusing on moisturizing. when i was faithfully going to a stylist, i focused more on oils and low manipulation styles, or styles that didn't require a lot of heat.

i am also trying out protective styling. i don't really know if it is helping me to retain, like the other ladies around here. i do it to keep my hands out of my hair and because it (bunning) is a simple style for around the house and errands.

i think a lot of are mothers just didn't know how to take care of our hair. now that we are grown and there is more info out there, we can all reach and strive for the lengths we desire.