What should I do??

[Saida]

My mother came for a visit all the way from denmark, to me her granddaughter and me and her son in law, and then ( I knew I shouldnt have) but I asked her to braid my hair, and I explained to her, to do it very loose and not to small cornrows, and to be very gentle, I kept saying it to and she was like okay okay, now when its done, first it looks uneven, tooooooooo tight im about to scream, and I dont want to hurt her feelings by taking them out. will it hurt my hair if I leave them in for 3 more days?

She is leaving on monday, and I know she would be hurt if I took them out, but honestly it looks a mess, my poor hair

im muslim so I wear hijab anyway so nobody has to see it but my husband and muslim sister so its not like im ashamed of how it looks, im just really scarred it will ruin my hair.

 

[Saida]

Im about to cry its too tight, my mother dosent understand longhaircareforum, she was against it from the beginning, and said that my hair is just bad hair, and I dont know what im doing,

but then today she saw the lenght of my hair, and it has grown alot, almost bra strap, and she was amazed so she asked fo my advice.

but my mother is toooooooo sensitive... I just know it would hurt her.

will it help to put water in my hair?

 

[shunta]

Yeah maybe you should let some water from the shower head stream across it. Im sorry I cant contribute much. I had braids a looong time ago, and I remember it being very tight, so I just took it down because I had a horrible headache. Maybe you should tell her that its hurting too bad and you need to take it out, but its nothing against her.

 

[Saida]

she is overly sensitive so it wont work, but I'll try the water thing, thank you shunta

 

[Nuelle]

Maybe you could wet your hair while it's braided, undo them a few mns later, wear a nice scarf, and just tell her you wanted to sport a braid-out.

 

[Saida]

Yeah she takes things personally there is no way around her, but if it will hurt my hair Im gonna have to tell her, but I can take a little pain, as long as it dosent hurt my hair thats the most important thing. I put some water in it, and it helped.

Im going to try that braid out after she leave though, thank you

 

[Tee]

Yeah maybe you should let some water from the shower head stream across it. Im sorry I cant contribute much. I had braids a looong time ago, and I remember it being very tight, so I just took it down because I had a horrible headache. Maybe you should tell her that its hurting too bad and you need to take it out, but its nothing against her.

Yes, I would just explain that it was causing me to much pain and headaches. Tell her AGAIN how much you appreciate her taking the time out to do it for you.

Can you just keep your hair covered around her until she leaves?

ETA....Dont let all your progress go down the drain because you are afraid of speaking up. I am feeling for you. huggles

 

[dillard]

Are they also heavy? If that's the case, I'd say they need to be removed ASAP. If they feel like they are loosening up and they aren't weighing down and pulling, you might survive another coupla days. But listen to your body, if you are feeling pain, something is getting damaged!!

 

[WomanlyCharm]

Hi Saida!
If the braids hurt, I would suggest taking them out.

I know your mother is sensitive, but even she would not like to see her daughter in pain.

And when you take the braids out, show amazment at the beautiful braidout that's resulted...tell her she's discovered a beautiful new way to style your hair, and you appreciate it more than you can say.

 

[RubyWoo]

My mother came for a visit all the way from denmark, to me her granddaughter and me and her son in law, and then ( I knew I shouldnt have) but I asked her to braid my hair, and I explained to her, to do it very loose and not to small cornrows, and to be very gentle, I kept saying it to and she was like okay okay, now when its done, first it looks uneven, tooooooooo tight im about to scream, and I dont want to hurt her feelings by taking them out. will it hurt my hair if I leave them in for 3 more days?

@the bolded:

Yes, it can definitely hurt your hair. Braids done too tightly can lead to apoleichia(sp?) and your hair can be ripped right from the root(read:bald spot(s)). I strongly advise that you have the braids loosened a bit. Good luck!

 

[Nonie]

Saida, can you feign a migraine and just exaggerate the agony you're in? Do you wear braids usually and does she know? If she doesn't you can just make out that you don't know why all of a sudden your head can't take them. I know people who are not used to braiding whose scalps are so sensitive that they cannot bear anyone to part their hair, let alone braid. Could that be part of the problem - if you aren't used to having your hair braided? That could be part of your excuse for washing your head (to ease your headache) if you think she'd be offended to find out you washed the do so soon. (That might help loosen them too.) Then if you still don't feel better, she might surprise you and be the one to recommend you take them out. Then you can express how sad it makes you that your head is so bloody sensitive when you really wanted to keep them in. (And that won't be a lie coz you would've kept them in for Mommy but not if they hurt.)

I'm so sorry.... I hate to hurt people's feelings so I really do feel your dilemma.

 

[Saida]

Thank you all ladies, for you nice advice, what I did was that I took out the braids, but the did them again looser this time, and then I just kept my scarfe on so she didnt even notice actually, and then the days she left I took the completly out I did feel bad for my hair though.