wyldcurlz
I have type 4, fine hair that is in its natural state. When I would do twists (to keep my hair stretched or for twist outs) I would have HELLA breakage. HELLA. What I realized after a long while was that my hair did not like to be manipulated while damp with anything ... that included water and leave-in conditioner.
I would use mist my hair with water and then apply a little bit of Garnier leave-in daily or every other day prior to manipulating my hair. I did this because I thought the wisest thing to do was to have my hair moisturized with something before doing anything to it. When I would go to twist it, even after detangling and removing all the shed hair I could fine, I would have all type of hair on my bathroom floor or in my hands. It was very discouraging.
When I relied on twist outs or twisting for stretching purposes, this was an everyday thang. Now, I don't do that style because I am PSing for a minute ... but if I needed to twist my hair now, it would be done on dry hair and I wouldn't add leave-in (I switched from creamy leave-ins to liquid ones because the creamy stuff was too much for my hair) until the style was completed.
It is important to note that when I was in that stage of my hair journey that I had a lot of issues going on: overly porous strands, overly raggedy ends from not dusting, and I think I overloaded my hair with moisture at the time because I rarely used any protein.
All in all, I said all that to say you are not the only one and you are not losing your mind.
Do you add a lot of moisture to your hair before styling? If so, how do you think your hair would respond if you manipulated it and THEN applied your leave-in ...