Is my stylist sabotoging my efforts?

[sjarman13]

I'm am consistently following with advice of the board with some success. But it seems that I am not retaining the thickness as my hair gets longer. I monitor my hair loss and it has decreased tremendously......but

It seems that when I get a relaxer, I loose too much hair. The shampoo tech tries very hard to conceal how much hair is in the sink, but I always ask. I tell her everytime she relaxes my hair that it is not necessary to make it bone straight. She also uses a small comb and combs the new growth when perming. I have stopped her from using those kinds of combs when doing comb-outs, but It has been difficult convincing her that the perm will straighten it and she doesn't need to comb it or that she should just smooth it with the back of the comb.
She uses desing essentials and I like the results, but who cares about nice bouncy hair if you're loosing half of it in the shampoo bowl.

I don't loose this type of hair at home and I do a hard protein treatment 2 weeks before! I also keep the the new growth very moisturized.

Help!

 

[BrEE]

yup, same thing has been happening to me which is why i'll be self relaxing from now on. when i wash my hair at home i lose 10-15 strands. i go for a touchup and they use the smallest tooth comb they can find to rip through my hair trying to detangle, i once lost a handful of hair. after she rinses the relaxer out of your hair maybe you can bring in your own wide tooth comb and tell her to use that for detangling.

 

[ms_kenesha]

Yes, your stylists is sabotaging your efforts, but she may not be doing it on purpose she may just be ignorant. But even if she is ignorant if you are requesting that she not do certain things, she shouldn't ignore your concerns and do what she wants to do. I would say find a new stylist.

 

[Tai]

I agree. I would find a new stylist. She may not be doing it purposely but you deserve to have a stylist who listens and works with you to achieve progress, not one who does whatever she wants to do.

 

[ladybug]

that brown/blk small tooth comb is the root of all evil IMHO...that comb should not be used unless you are using the point end for a style...parting....or back for smoothing...that comb pulls out more hair than it is suppose to retain...

 

[abainaa]

It makes me soo angry to see months of effort and care wash down my stylists drain and it happens to me all the time!
My last salon visit I lost a pile of hair the size of my palm and I wouldn't have known unless I turned around and looked.
AAHHH!

 

[aqualung]

I'm upset and adding on to this thread in order to vent.

My stylist is a dream, but the shampoo girl RIPS through my hair and hides how much hair breaks/snaps/rips out.

I got really upset about it yesterday, and said loudly "It sounds like it's ripping. Can you show me how much is coming out?" She replied "I'm almost done." She's new and nervous. She's not the 1st shampoo girl to have difficulty with me. I had to stop another girl and call over the stylist to finish the detangling.

It's not her fault that I have fine 4b super tangly hair, but it's not my job to teach her how to detangle from ends to roots. I explained all this to the stylist before I left without tipping.

Solution: I'm going to specifically request that my stylist do the detangling at the washbowl from now on. I only go in to the salon once a month or two months.

My ends are VISIBLY THINNER today than before the shampoo girl snatched me bald headed. My stylist wants to do a 3 inch trim.

I MAINTAIN MY ENDS AT HOME, BUT GET SABOTAGED AT THE SALON.

 

[brownhaired_bonanza]

after she rinses the relaxer out of your hair maybe you can bring in your own wide tooth comb and tell her to use that for detangling.

That's EXACTLY what I did! The last time I got a relaxer, the shampoo lady pulled out that mini-microscopic rat-tailed comb. An unecessary amount of hair came out of my head. And I siad never again. My next relaxer I'm shoving my new, wide tooth comb in her face and I don't care how much she rolls her eyes at me . I'm paying my money, she's using my comb.

 

[tryn2growmyhair]

I'm upset and adding on to this thread in order to vent.

My stylist is a dream, but the shampoo girl RIPS through my hair and hides how much hair breaks/snaps/rips out.

I got really upset about it yesterday, and said loudly "It sounds like it's ripping. Can you show me how much is coming out?" She replied "I'm almost done." She's new and nervous. She's not the 1st shampoo girl to have difficulty with me. I had to stop another girl and call over the stylist to finish the detangling.

It's not her fault that I have fine 4b super tangly hair, but it's not my job to teach her how to detangle from ends to roots. I explained all this to the stylist before I left without tipping.

Solution: I'm going to specifically request that my stylist do the detangling at the washbowl from now on. I only go in to the salon once a month or two months.

My ends are VISIBLY THINNER today than before the shampoo girl snatched me bald headed. My stylist wants to do a 3 inch trim.

I MAINTAIN MY ENDS AT HOME, BUT GET SABOTAGED AT THE SALON.

This is exactly why I ONLY go to the salon for a touchup. My hair has grown several inches and prospered as a result.

MegonW, I am convinced that we are hair twins. My hair a bit shorter than yours, it is past my shoulders and three inches away from armpit, but it is also thin and fragile. That, and the fact that stylists are usually too rough with my hair, is the reason why I have stopped going to salons.

I also found that telling them to stop sometimes would only make it worse because they would get mad and the next time you came tear at your hair even more. So I just stopped going. A side effect has been that I am no longer salon dependent and I save money.

I am too scared to self-relax. For the relaxers I just switched around until I found someone who would be gentle. I didnt even need to bring a comb because she uses bone combs. And she does not comb my hair with a fine tooth comb either, but uses a medium teeth comb for rollerset. She actually listens to me. Something many stylists unfortunately find hard to do.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

That's the only thing I don't like about some of the dominican salons. They do a great job on hair, but they scrape my scalp raw with their washing techniques!! I know we want the hair clean, but SHEESH!!! They act like I have some kind of parasite in my scull that needs to be ripped out or something! LOL*

I will try to tell them to please be gentle with my hair. I always use the excuse that I have a "sensitive scalp", or I'm "tender-headed" (even though I'm not really), and usually people ease up. But, I'll keep out for those stylists that just want to get you back and tear at your hair even more.

I know one thing, my "black" stylist keeps on using that tiny rat tail comb to comb the relaxer in. Even though I tell her not to put relaxer on my edges since I have baby fine hair, and she says: "oh, don't worry it will be okay. I just won't put that much on the edges." Ummmm...I'm sitting there thinking: "okay...WHAT PART of DON'T put relaxer on my edges did you NOT understand??" Ughgh! I shouldn't have let her do it.

I'm starting to wonder too if maybe my stylist is trying to sabotage my hair. I only go to her for touchups (I go to the Dominicans in between touchups for rollersets) but she is always bragging about how LONG and pretty her daughter's hair is. She even brought in pictures. But now that MY hair is getting longer and more healthy, I'm wondering if maybe she's not secretly trying to sabotage my hair in a way. She always cuts my hair now after my relaxer. I don't think I always need it, but I've been noticing her do this recently. Hmmm....I'm wondering if I should switch stylists even though I'm VERY tired of switching. I need to find ONE stylist that does relaxers and STICK with them! But I'm kind of afraid of getting a relaxer touch up at a Dominican salon. No offense. i just trust black stylists for this. But...I could be just being close-minded. :-/

 

[lkg4healthyhair]

I get my relaxers done by the same two women (one is backup) for years at a Dominican Salon. They know what I want and will do what I request (hair line last no comb).

I get my wash at a diff Dominican Salon near my home and the shampoo woman was very rough with my hair. She was basically scratching my scalp with her nails and went to wash it 3 times. She was also very rough with the large tooth comb. I get my hair done there because I just couldn't detangle properly at home then she starts ripping my hair out. My hair is very very fine and shedding (post pardom) and that is the last thing I need.

The next time I went in I gave her my product and told her up front "only one wash" and no scrub (showing her what I mean with my fingers) only smooth..."suave"...and she got it...that's my favorite word. It means "smooth".

I gave her my detangler ( The Detangler by Paul Mitchell) and told her to be gentle...she started ripping again and I stopped her and told her its too rough. Now she gets it.....

Unless you do your own hair you have to be very firm with shampoo people and stylists, they just don't get it. YOU MUST SPEAK UP!!!!!

 

[brownhaired_bonanza]

Unless you do your own hair you have to be very firm with shampoo people and stylists, they just don't get it. YOU MUST SPEAK UP!!!!!

Oy, that's tough!

But I couldn't agree more. We gotta be more brave.

 

[senimoni]

Ok maybe I'm brainwashed but how can you straighten your hair without using a comb to go through it...??

 

[naptrl]

This hairdresser sabatoge thing is EXACTLY why I dropped my last "pressing disaster" hair stylist!! I'm sooo sick of hair dressers! I will not be going except to get a trim from now on! And i MIGHT LEARN HOW TO DO That!!!!!