Jealous hair dressers.

I've seen people get messed up cuts because of a clients ablility to tip properly....Let me tell yall jealous in the salon isn't always about our hair. I've seen the jealousy over the material things as well as great hair :ohwell:.
 
I had a jealous hairdresser when I was in junior high. my hair must have been about mbl, though I wasn't really concious of it. the hairdresser would blow it out then tuck the ends up with her hands as best she could to make it look like sl. she would get this constipated look on her face and wouldn't look me in the eye.
 
I've gone to my current stylist a little over 5 yrs now. However, in that duration, I moved to a major city about 1 1/2 away. It became a hassle to make the drive back and forth, so I had to resort to finding another stylist in that city. I asked around, researched, visited various salons and finally settled on one. My hair was an oily mess after a flat iron. I repeated this process, only to end up in the chair of a woman who applied a relaxer on my hair from root to tip of my then MBL hair. Upon realizing this, I had her wash immediately and asked her why in the *el* she did this. She said, "to make it easier for you to flat iron." After a few choice words, I left with a wet head without paying her. My hair had never been that damaged in my life. Each time I would comb it, it would break of into different lengths. I then went to a male stylist that someone highly recommended in hopes that he wouldn't be jealous and repair the damage. He helped to some degree, but then he started suggesting that we start hanging out. I wasn't attracted to him, not to mention that I wanted strictly a business relationship with this man. I declined his advances, only for him to become "more forward." I got to work the following day after that visit to salon to find out from my co-workers that in addition to my overprocessed hair, I now have a jacked up cut! My hair was all uneven in the back to the point that it slightly resembled the old school wop!:wallbash:
 
Ive never had a jealous stylist and my stylist now wears nothing but weaves but she is the one who informed me of healthy hair practices BEFORE i started my journey. She would talk to me about cowashing, moisturizing & sealing hair and at the time i was like man this lady is a nut job..me -> "bLaCk FoLkS cAnT wAsH tHeIr HaIr EvErYdAy!!!!"

But I stick with this lady even though she wears weaves cause she obviously practices healthy hair techniques and she always takes great care of my hair whenever I go in. This other stylist on the other hand permed my hair root to tip but she wasnt jealous just wasnt good. I shouldve never trusted her being she didnt know what 1/4 a cup was..relaxing hair is a form of chemistry and here i am trusting a lady who doesnt know basic measurements.
 
This is sad. Luckily I don't have to worry about relaxers as I'm currently natural. But I DO fear going for a cut, so I trim myself. I would only go to a supercuts or a place like that where they just trim exactly what you want and nothing else, or someone with long hair who would not feel jealous. Because I don't think someone would go through all the other trouble, even if I had a relaxer, but I DO think they would cut too much possibly out of jealousy, or just because that's what they like doing.
 
Well, I would trust a stylist if I could find one that listened to me and has healthy hair practices. I thought that if I went to a white girl with long hair that I could avoid all the problems associated with getting a trim. I was wrong...she has a mainly black clientele and the first thing she said was I need a relaxer. (I am natural; my hair was flat ironed, but my roots were puffy.) :nono: After that, she tried to make my hair even in the back. That was the first and last time I go to her. I don't think it was jealousy though; I just think she thought she knew what was best for me, which is just as bad IMO.

If I could find a stylist whose own hair was healthy (and if she covered it with a weave, it would have to be a good one) and who made suggestions to me that made me believe she promoted healthy hair, maybe I would trust a stylist...but so far, I have not been able to find this.
 
IDareT'sHair said:
I..............
2) after 90% of my Hair Fell out late last year due to overprocessing/improper nueturalization.:wallbash:
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Really!!! thats so bad, what did you do?!!

I think if I went for a relaxer I would bring and old large water bottle mixed with ACV and water to neturalise and make sure the shampoo girl uses it, 2 half handed shampoo's are not enough.

I'd prefer to relax my hair myself anyway, if I did go to a salon it would be a white salon just for a trim.
 
There are definitely some jealous hairdressers out there. So far I have been blessed to avoid any major incidents. I typically look at the health of my beautician's hair when deciding whether I want to sit in her chair. However when my hair was much longer, around MBL, I would notice other stylists in the shops giving me funny looks. When I was going to JcPenney's salon, one stylist (not my stylist) hollered out that I should get my hair cut and try something different for a change and then snickered. Did I mention that she had severely damaged hair that was extremely short and she was always moaning about how she couldn't get it to grow? Right.

My mom used to always say that she had better experiences with male hair stylists. However, in this day and age I have seen more than a few male stylists that are either jealous of a woman with long hair or are just scissor happy in general. I had to stop going to one because he wanted to give me a "trim" every single time I went!

As for white stylists, I went to two at Vidal Sassoon. That was when my hair was MBL. When I first walked in that day my hair was kinda curly and so it looked much shorted than it was. Once it was blown out though they could see the length. My stylist (white woman) called ALL of the other stylists over to see how long my hair was. They were just standing there with their jaws on the floor. I knew what the problem was...and one of them basically almost let it slip when she said, "wow. Your hair is so long, I've never seen..." Then she caught herself. Ugh.
 
my old hair dresser secretly hated me even though we were friends. every time i reach a certain lenght she tells me i need a trim and she would cut the hell out of my hair not knowing she had bad thoughts about me yikes. to say the least i cut that brawd off and my hair has been growing lovely ever since i got those hands out of my head
 
Yes, they are jealous hair dressers out there. The best stylist I ever had moved to Atlanta, GA! I was so hurt by the move. ***CRIES**** I heard stories of stylists cutting too much length off and leaving relaxers on for too long.
 
These stories are almost heartberaking to read. I'll be glad for the day we can move past treating our sisters like this.
 
It's horrible to hear these stories. Funny thing is, in my experience, hair dressers love the girls with long, beautiful hair being their clients because they can take the credit for it, although more than likely, it has nothing to do with them.
 
BostonMaria said:
No because the salon I go to the women there have long hair.

My only fear is that they don't do my hair right because I only go once a year. I can picture the stylist saying yeah I'll fix her butt right now for being cheap (insert evil laugh here)
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Same here. At the salons I go to, the stylists & the clients have super thick, healthy, long hair - some natural, some relaxed. I also get recommendations from people with healthy hair before I go somewhere. I found my two staple Dominican salons in DC based on recommendations - 1 from a soror with healthy APL relaxed hair & one from a natural with BSL-length hair, stretched. They never complain or roughly handle my hair, even when I'm stretching.

CHECKMATE! said:
To answer: I guess I don't worry about it anymore because my stylist hair is almost WL,so no jealousy there...Honestly,and I hope I don't come off wrong,but I always selected stylists based on their own hair length/health...if it wasn't as healthy/longer than mine...they did NOT touch my hair:look:
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Very true. My dear (AA) stylist in Houston had long, pretty hair & was always rocking rollersets & braidouts. She tried to turn me on to healthy hair care and streching years ago, but I was hooked on the "freshly relaxed & flat-ironed" look.

Sometimes it's the stylist's bad practices, sometimes they are just giving us what we ask for.
 
luckiestdestiny said:
This is sad. Luckily I don't have to worry about relaxers as I'm currently natural. But I DO fear going for a cut, so I trim myself. I would only go to a supercuts or a place like that where they just trim exactly what you want and nothing else, or someone with long hair who would not feel jealous. Because I don't think someone would go through all the other trouble, even if I had a relaxer, but I DO think they would cut too much possibly out of jealousy, or just because that's what they like doing.
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I would only be willing to go to white people for trims... Supercuts is where I Go.

:look::look:
 
Yikes. I know that once I'm past SL, I am definitely becoming a total DIYer. Just looking at some of the pics & stories people have posted here, I'm afraid this happens often. Like the member who posted a few months back about her "trim" and went from BSL to SL... :nono: Ain't no way all that hair was "damaged", especially since she had her previous pics posted and her hair looked vibrant & healthy to me. And the member who posted about her experience last night... :nono: People do indeed hate sometimes. Or they assume that just because someone has long hair, it *must* be damaged or in need of a 6-inch trim. :rolleyes: I don't get it. All I know is I trim my own shizz, even if it's a bit uneven.
 
The lady that does my hair is the SAME lady that did my hair in Eritrea and Israel when I heard she moved to the Chicago Area I was delighted. My other Friend Flowers McKnight over at Yahya's in Hyde Park is all about Health and growth. One has VERY long hair by chioice the other has short hair BY choice. But I swear Flowers can turn a cockroach into a butterfly. She does make up too. She told me many moons ago about Jealous hairdressers she has been one for over 30 years. She owned a shop in LA. I could not believe the stories. But yeah just like you have to be careful about who you let in your life you have to be careful about who you let touch your head.

both of them are very religious and spiritual and they both said touching of the scalp and hair is very intimate and you have to be careful or toxic people. You don't want negative souls touching your head

Makes sense to me
 
That is why if I let a stylist do my hair - her hair need to be in tip top shape (even on her worst day)!!! I tend to think they are not only jealous of our hair- it's the simple fact that WE know more than them and that we are being specific about what we want done to our hair and that they "can't run game" anymore - so it does seem like we are undermining them - especially if other clients are around..

I can't style hair worth a durn but I got product knowledge and I can't stand when I know more than the stylist....

(this is based on my experiences)
 
sqzbly1908 said:
That is why if I let a stylist do my hair - her hair need to be in tip top shape (even on her worst day)!!! I tend to think they are not only jealous of our hair- it's the simple fact that WE know more than them and that we are being specific about what we want done to our hair and that they "can't run game" anymore - so it does seem like we are undermining them - especially if other clients are around..

I can't style hair worth a durn but I got product knowledge and I can't stand when I know more than the stylist....

(this is based on my experiences)
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this is the funniest part..... I know a HELLUVA lot more than any stylist I have met.
 
I have been fortunate to have great stylists. They enjoyed doing hair and actually loved hair. They would never think of harming anyone and they were well trained. Moreover, they were good businesspersons, who knew better than to send a client out of the salon with HAM hair. That hair was a reflection of their work and great hair is the best referral.

Now, wash girls/guys and assistants are another story. I am one of the clients that is done start to finish by the stylist in most instances. Especially, if an assistant starts wrong, I do not know them or I get a strange vibe from them.
 
Qualitee said:
But all because your stylist has long hair doesnt mean she wont hate or try to destroy your hair. Some women just want to be the only ones with nice long hair, so you have to look out for them too:nono:
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Reading this makes me think of what happened the last time I had braids...The entire time the girl was doing my hair (shop of Africans) they all kept talking about how long my hair was and how thick it was..and it wasn't a compliment. She didn't braid past my hair either. I couldn't tell my own hair from the braid hair in the end and ended up cutting my own hair.:ohwell: I don't like cutting my hair on accident:perplexed, lol so I was kind of upset. :sad: All of them were bald-headed too (like what WAS there literally was indeed a nappy mess with bald patches...which I didn't see until half my head was braided bc they had beanies and stuff on.)
 
I only let stylists who are secure within their own right do my hair, which is why I only see someone off referral and actually seeing their work on other people. So basically - I trust my stylist. She has WL hair and mine is just a little longer than hers. I used to not believe that anyone - especially a stylist would envy a person's hair and purposely mess it up, but I have heard some horror stories.

Aside from products and actual styling methods, people have to remember to take notice to a person's demeanor and character vibes before they sit in the chair. If I have an inkling that something isn't right or if a stylist is giving me a funny look then I'm walking out of there with a quickness. I usually have a male stylist within reach for this very reason but thankfully I get my hair done by real, mature women who just dont have time for that petty mess.

She has WL hair and mine is just a little longer than hers. I used to not believe that anyone - especially a stylist would envy a person's hair and purposely mess it up, but I dont know.
 
After running into my old hairdresser a while back and the "painfully happy" look she had on her face when she complimented me on my hair...I know it exists.
 
Lucky's Mom said:
I would only be willing to go to white people for trims... Supercuts is where I Go.

:look::look:
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:ohwell::rolleyes::look: I was THINKING this myself but you read between the lines. The best trims I ever received were from white and asian people. They did EXACTLY what I wanted and nothing more.

Not that there aren't any competent black stylist...it's just that most WON'T listen when you say you want only a specific amount trimmed. Even if you use your fingers to show, and then use your hair as reference to show how much, they'll still end up giving you a chop...

maybe it's that whole jealousy thing. The women are mad that my hair is long and they chop away. Whereas the white or asian women are used to long hair (sadly) so they just do what is specified. I say sadly because there aren't more of us with long hair (exception to this site) so that the jealousy is still there in our community (among our hairstylists).
 
These stories are true, the sad part is before i came here i had the idea that stylist knew about hair care :lachen:, yea RIGHT....that's a joke, most of them just tryin to hurry up give u something and get u out (more money). When i used to get a relaxer i went to a lady that's been doing hair for like 35-40 yrs, one of those who don't belive in natural hair, u know "oh u need to do something w that mess", . I have always had long hair , never really thought about getting it to a certain length, so i would do my own rollersets and only go to her for realxzers...mnaybe every 3 months, every time she would talk about how thick and long it was, but she insisted on cutting my hair everytime, i used to wonder why but ...thought she knew what was best, ...oh and she would never let me look and would ALWAYS sweep up the hair so i could not see how much , she kept me at armpit length. I am so glad i went natural ...even through trial and erroe ...it was so worth it ....i do everything MYSELF!!!
 
It took me years to find a good stylist. I've always had stylist that would "trim" my neck length hair to ear length in an attempt to "even" it out. I've had them rip my hair out with fishtail combs they use to detangle. I even had a weave put in once to give it a try and when I decided to take it out two weeks later because I had a perpetual headache due to the extremely tight braids. My stylist decided it would be better to comb out the braid and I had to get my hair cut the shortest it's even been in my life. It just so happened that a few years later I went back and there was Darlene who sat me down and told me what my hair needed and how to get my hair to grow long. She had me sold when she trimmed my hair and it looked longer then when I came in. She worked out a plan and wanted me to come in every 2 weeks and she would take care of my hair. Of course I couldn't come in every two weeks and luckily I found this awesome site with so many knowledgeable women and began my journey.

Also, my BF's mother went to school to become a stylist and the advice she gives me on my hair are old wives tales. They are clearly teaching myths about black hair in cosmetology school.. still. Because she swears that black people shouldn't wash our hair more than once a week and it's better to wash every 2.
 
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