Too scared to go natural

[facets]

Hey naturaline,

i just left a comment in your photos... Your hair rocks!..OMG I think I've finally found a hair twin too! If you look in my misc. there's an old pic with my fro. it's not super-clear but gives you an idea. I'm so excited to grow mine out again.

no more 'laxers and texturizahs(even those are a 'no go') for me.

i was kinda scared to go natural. the first time i tryed it i had to turn back and relax cus the new growth was tick! but sept 04 i just went 4 it and my new growth has gotten softer and softer- i wash it every 4/7days and keep it Moist!
as a child my hair was elbow length and sooo think it could easier be shared between three heads (no joke) i used to cry just looking at the comb! because iv been relaxing it for like 10years now its changed in curl pattern so the course but still very thick.

im Go glad i went natural... i feel like im being true to myself

 

[Poohbear]

Are any of you relaxed, texlaxed, texturized, permed and just too scared to go natural?

what isit that yoir afraid of?

i'm afraid of having to cut my relaxed hair

i'm afraid of hating my natural hair

i'm afraid of not bein able to comb my hair

i'm afraid of the sterotype of young black chicks, relaxed hair is a must, unless you got some canerow skills or u wear sum pretty extensions...i cant even wear extensions my hair is so thick i look like a tree

When it comes to going natural, a mind and heart transition must take place within you. I'm natural and what helped me in my decision to return back to wearing my hair naturally was looking at natural hair albums. Big inspiration. When I was relaxed, I was stuck on hair length and was afraid of what I would look like with short hair if I did the big chop. I wasn't afraid of hating my natural hair or not being able to comb it. So I decided to transition. I planned on transitioning for 2 years but only did it for a little over 7 months. I saw the benefits of having natural hair outweighed trying to hold on to length. Plus, the relaxed ends were breaking off anyway at the demarcation line. I also realized that wearing my hair natural was ME and God made my hair to grow out of my head this way.

Whatever you decide to do with your hair, don't be afraid... be encouraged.

 

[Miss*Tress]

I never knew how to style my natural hair, so a high school friend with similar texture to mine - who always had nicely styled, healthy, long, relaxed hair - talked me into getting a relaxer.

Now, many years later, I still wouldn't know what to do with my natural hair.

If I could get my hair to look like Ananda's overnight, instead of transitioning, BCing, and all that I would go natural in a minute.

 

[Dlene]

That was hilarious. I love this cartoon. LOL!!!

I am thinking of going natural. I am currently in the transitioning phase, 16 weeks post. I know one thing, I will not be getting the BC just because I do not want to start from square 1, but if I ever get frustrated or just want that straight look again I can always just relax again. But my guess is I will stick through the transitioning phase and go natural because I loved my hair when it was natural and long during my early childhood. Lately, people have been asking me if I get a relaxer or not, and I am like, "Yes, I get relaxers." People tell me I don't look like it especially within a month whenever I let my hair airdry and wear it in that state without blow-drying or anything, after taking it down from my usual bun. Plus, I will be a freshamn in college this fall, and I am not about to start looking for stylists to put relaxers on my hair and run the risk of really going through those adverse effects of relaxers that I have seen happen to so many other people and my friends. So, transitioning and going natural I think will be and is the best decision for me.

this is a cartoon from natrually you mag fits the thread

http://www.naturallyyoumagazine.com/funstuff/val-and-nadine-natural-hair-comic.html#

 

[Plenty]

Are any of you relaxed, texlaxed, texturized, permed and just too scared to go natural?

what isit that yoir afraid of?

i'm afraid of having to cut my relaxed hair

i'm afraid of hating my natural hair

i'm afraid of not bein able to comb my hair

i'm afraid of the sterotype of young black chicks, relaxed hair is a must, unless you got some canerow skills or u wear sum pretty extensions...i cant even wear extensions my hair is so thick i look like a tree

This is a valid concern. I had 2 years of NG before I started wearing my hair after wearing braids for two years.

I have never got more dirty looks from not only whites but form blacks also.

I relaxed immediately after...

 

[*Happily Me*]

I transitioned for 7 months. In the beginning, it was good. My hair was manageble until I hit the 6th month.

Oh man... I was unhappy. I really, truly could not comb my hair!! I used a big *** k-cutter sized comb, bottles of detangling conditioner and nothing worked. My hair was dry, brittle and damaged looking. I have super thick 4b/a mostly b hair.

I felt unpretty and I missed my swinging, longish hair I clearly don't have the mindset at this time.

I relaxed and i'm happy with the state of my hair again. I more texturized... I leave the relaxer on for 5 minutes.

I think i'll attempt to transition again some day when I'm older. You really have to be in the mindset to go natural. I think it's a beautiful thing and I admire and secretly envy some of ya'll who are natural and representing.

 

[scorpian]

I was natural for a year and went back to a relaxer
When I was natural I received a lot of compliments from men and women of all different races and the black men loved the natural!!!
My family members were more critical then any stranger out on the street could ever be they alwaaays had something to say(why you wanna wear your hair like that::you look like a groupie from the 70's::Angela Davis wanna be)

Anyway I went back to a relaxer out of frustration my scalp was always sore my hair felt dry and I didn't know what else to do with it
Now that I have been reading this site and a lot of other info on natural haircare I realize that there were a lot of other options other than relaxing my hair I may transition again
who knows? I'm still learning
I love to see beautiful hair and learning how to take care of it has been easier since joining this board
relaxed or natural if it's healthy I think it all looks good

 

[sareca]

I'm not afraid per se, I just don't think its for me. I'd be spending way to much effort to make it straight...so there wouldn't really be a point in me doing it. Honestly if my hair was a little more uniform in texture I might would consider it. But everytime I get to 10+ weeks post I'm reminded why I don't think I'll ever go natural.

Same here. I've been natural. It took 2X as much product (i.e., money) and 3X as much time to style my hair.

Although I must admit I have considered transistioning, I think I'll just get my natural hair fix by stretching. I'm building up to once/year. I'm at 3X/year now.

 

[Lioness]

I've just read the whole post...
Taking a spin on things- Too scared to relax...
I'm 100% natural, and when I BC'd it was haaaard to not have as much hair. But then, when it grew and I saw my natural hair in it's truest form, I had a new found appreciation for what God has given me.
However, I find myself now at the point where, my hair has grown longer than ever (since I was a child) in its natural state, but now, the afro is just huge!
I wear weaves 99 % of the time, becuase I don't actually know what to do with my hair (subconciously protecting my hair from any damage? ).
I looove having natural hair, but it's ironic that I wear straight weaves all the time
I am really considering relaxing, as maybe it would be easier to care for (thanks LHCF) AND no more sore scalp from pulling on little knots!
I really don't know what to do-
I don't want to relax and then regret it becuase there's not as much volume.erplexed
And I don't want to texturise in case I put the chemical in my hair and it makes not much of a difference! What's a girl to do???

To all the relaxed peeps: Why do people prefer relaxed hair over natural hair?
And do you think your hair would have progressed the way it has, had you been natural?

 

[Sweetyb]

Ha ha! This is my favorite:

http://www.naturallyyoumagazine.com/funstuff/val-and-nadine-natural-hair-comic.html#

 

[beyondcute]

Im transitioing and Im not afriad of how my hair will look. Its my hair. Id be crazy to walk around burnign my face cuz I didnt want to know or couldnt deal with what lurked beneath. What Im sturggling wiht is growing out this color and length. Ive never had short hair and the minichope I had was really uncomfortable. Although it looked nice I wasnt used to it and I caught alot of flack behind cutting what I did cut.

The ladies that hate dealing with it, you cant tell me that you put forth no effort with your relaxed or texturized hair. It still requires care and attention. My relaxed hair took just as long to style as my transitioing hair and probably my natural hair will have the same amount of drama. Its a fight yes. I agree but dont you think its worth winning? Im never gonna give up on my hair or have a bad attitude about it. I AM THE OWNER my hair does not own me!

 

[naturaline]

Hey naturaline,

i just left a comment in your photos... Your hair rocks!..OMG I think I've finally found a hair twin too! If you look in my misc. there's an old pic with my fro. it's not super-clear but gives you an idea. I'm so excited to grow mine out again.

no more 'laxers and texturizahs(even those are a 'no go') for me.

thanks for the hair twin comment! you have beautiful hair

 

[Country gal]

I use to be scared too. I love being natural. I was afraid guys specifically black men would not find me attractive. I get lots of compliments. My hair is so healthy. I love being natural and getting compliments. They are complimenting my God given natural beauty.

 

[shiningstar84]

I use to be scared too. I love being natural. I was afraid guys specifically black men would not find me attractive. I get lots of compliments. My hair is so healthy. I love being natural and getting compliments. They are complimenting my God given natural beauty.

Just wanted to add that the only time i got compliments on my hair as a permie was when i got a fresh perm, but now that i no longer wear my hair bone straight i get way more compliments

 

[~*~ShopAholic~*~]

OT: that natural comic strip was too funny and cute.
On topic: I guess like beyondcute said, " I am the owner my hair does not own me" and this is why i relax, because I can. My hair can't talk, let alone has never threatened me w/a gun to relax. I've never been afraid to go natural, just don't want to go back to being natural today, and who knows if I ever will. Now when I first came to this site I wanted to go natural because so and so was and their hair was sooo cute, but when I thought about it I didn't want to be natural cause I wanted natural hair again but I was hype off of others pple's results. When I thought deeper I would find myself maxigliding all the like clock work, so why go natural if I'm never going to enjoy the natural hair and styles.

 

[BerrySweet]

OT: that natural comic strip was too funny and cute.
On topic: I guess like beyondcute said, " I am the owner my hair does not own me" and this is why i relax, because I can. My hair can't talk, let alone has never threatened me w/a gun to relax. I've never been afraid to go natural, just don't want to go back to being natural today, and who knows if I ever will. Now when I first came to this site I wanted to go natural because so and so was and their hair was sooo cute, but when I thought about it I didn't want to be natural cause I wanted natural hair again but I was hype off of others pple's results. When I thought deeper I would find myself maxigliding all the like clock work, so why go natural if I'm never going to enjoy the natural hair and styles.

I love this response!!! After much pondering I've decided to go natural! I started to feel like a fake with my relaxed hair. So if I can grow long and healthy relaxed hair, there's no reason for me to be able to grow healthy natural hair. I'll work on the length part later.

 

[Suri]

The first time I went natural, I transitioned for 5-6 months and BC'd. I got a handful of compliments and NEVER styled my hair myself. I got frustrated with it and relaxed after about 4 months.

Here I am transitioning again, but this time I am 15 months into it. I have thought about relaxing, even though when I maxi glide it is just as straight, if not straighter than my relaxed hair. I believe that some people like to go back and forth because they go through different phases where they prefer a different look.

Transitioning and being natural is largely about dependency and creativity. Those who depend on a stylist or styles seen in magazines will
leave themselves open to only that option, but if you take the time to look at yourself in the mirror, play with your hair, and find your style, you can create your look. I have reached plateaus during my transition, but in all honesty I want to give my natural hair a chance, I may relax again, who knows but I am in the natural phase right now, I want to enjoy it. My relaxed hair was beautiful and very unique; free of scalp burns and other horror stories. I want to see what the natural look is on me. It's all about having fun. Do what you want and make sure you exercise your resources before giving up. There is SO much information here; there is no way you can't reach all your hair goals!

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[Leslie_C]

The first time I went natural, I transitioned for 5-6 months and BC'd. I got a handful of compliments and NEVER styled my hair myself. I got frustrated with it and relaxed after about 4 months.

Here I am transitioning again, but this time I am 15 months into it. I have thought about relaxing, even though when I maxi glide it is just as straight, if not straighter than my relaxed hair. I believe that some people like to go back and forth because they go through different phases where they prefer a different look.

Transitioning and being natural is largely about dependency and creativity. Those who depend on a stylist or styles seen in magazines will
leave themselves open to only that option, but if you take the time to look at yourself in the mirror, play with your hair, and find your style, you can create your look. I have reached plateaus during my transition, but in all honesty I want to give my natural hair a chance, I may relax again, who knows but I am in the natural phase right now, I want to enjoy it. My relaxed hair was beautiful and very unique; free of scalp burns and other horror stories. I want to see what the natural look is on me. It's all about having fun. Do what you want and make sure you exercise your resources before giving up. There is SO much information here; there is no way you can't reach all your hair goals!

nice post Im "unofficially" transitioning and havent relaxed since september. Im going to BC soon, start cornrowing it weekly and wearing a Lacefront until I get enough length to work with. I like this option better than braids bc I can take the wig off to treat my hair anytime I want. I live in FL so Im not sure how realistic it would be for me to try to keep a press, etc, so time will tell if I stay natural but wearing the LF should keep me from getting frustrated all the time and resorting to relaxing bc of it. At the very least I want to grow a full head of healthy natural virgin hair so if I do relax then Im starting with healthy hair.

I basically did something similar to grow my hair out before except I lightly relaxed 2 or 3 times over the 1.5 year period and grew it a little past shoulder length and this time Id like to not relax it the whole time. I know what I will do differently this time bc once hair is overprocessed it seems to never fully recover. My hair just got thinner and thinner and broke off until I basically ended up needing to start over. I cut it to neck length and its growing but Im not satisfied with the condition overall and the broken areas so I think a BC will be a good thing.

 

[baglady215]

This is a very good thread!

I'm not scared to go natural. I just prefer being relaxed. I think I could deal with natural hair just fine, the same way I learned to deal with my relaxed hair. I will probably transition sometime during my lifetime. It's just not something that I want to do now.

 

[CurleeDST]

I am so glad to read your story. Going natural isn't the end all, be all, and options are the spice of life. Whether one chooses to relax or wear their hair naturally is a personal decision but I hope people are not going natural b/c they think it will reflect negatively on them which is why many worry about going on job interviews with naturally kinky/curly hair.

There is nothing to be scared of but fear itself. I wonder if people are "scared" b/c they used to think negatively about other people who wore their hair in its natural state.

The first time I went natural, I transitioned for 5-6 months and BC'd. I got a handful of compliments and NEVER styled my hair myself. I got frustrated with it and relaxed after about 4 months.

Here I am transitioning again, but this time I am 15 months into it. I have thought about relaxing, even though when I maxi glide it is just as straight, if not straighter than my relaxed hair. I believe that some people like to go back and forth because they go through different phases where they prefer a different look.

Transitioning and being natural is largely about dependency and creativity. Those who depend on a stylist or styles seen in magazines will
leave themselves open to only that option, but if you take the time to look at yourself in the mirror, play with your hair, and find your style, you can create your look. I have reached plateaus during my transition, but in all honesty I want to give my natural hair a chance, I may relax again, who knows but I am in the natural phase right now, I want to enjoy it. My relaxed hair was beautiful and very unique; free of scalp burns and other horror stories. I want to see what the natural look is on me. It's all about having fun. Do what you want and make sure you exercise your resources before giving up. There is SO much information here; there is no way you can't reach all your hair goals!

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[bluenude]

anyone here looking for ways to style natural hair PLEASE visit:

http://www.motowngirl.com

She breaks it down for clueless folk like me!

 

[Lioness]

Thanx for the web site. Ima check it out.

 

[CurleeDST]

Motown's site is great.

 

[Suri]

nice post Im "unofficially" transitioning and havent relaxed since september. Im going to BC soon, start cornrowing it weekly and wearing a Lacefront until I get enough length to work with. I like this option better than braids bc I can take the wig off to treat my hair anytime I want. I live in FL so Im not sure how realistic it would be for me to try to keep a press, etc, so time will tell if I stay natural but wearing the LF should keep me from getting frustrated all the time and resorting to relaxing bc of it. At the very least I want to grow a full head of healthy natural virgin hair so if I do relax then Im starting with healthy hair.

I basically did something similar to grow my hair out before except I lightly relaxed 2 or 3 times over the 1.5 year period and grew it a little past shoulder length and this time Id like to not relax it the whole time. I know what I will do differently this time bc once hair is overprocessed it seems to never fully recover. My hair just got thinner and thinner and broke off until I basically ended up needing to start over. I cut it to neck length and its growing but Im not satisfied with the condition overall and the broken areas so I think a BC will be a good thing.

This is a good idea. When I used to relax I would stretch 6 months, and if I ever go back I would do the same. That is why I think my relaxed hair was healthy and I was never getting burned, breakage, etc. Relaxing bone straight ever 6-8 weeks is a no-no at least not for healthy hair growth. GL with your transition, it sounds like you have a good plan in action.