Article I Found Interesting - Hair Weaves Tangle Self-Image for Black Women

jerseygurl

Not a new member
Envi ITA. For the women in Nigeria (Can't speakk for any other), style and versatility is the word. A girl can decide to rock an afro weave and 2 weeks later she is in braids. It just depends on what they want to do with their hair.

I think what is becoming prevalent is the desire to emulate the people (read American women) they see on tv. Hence, the high number of weaved up heads you see in most countries in Africa. Growing up, few people had weaves it was mostly relaxers or natural hair.

But it's jmho.
 

locabouthair

Well-Known Member
My friend told me, "You should get a weave, don't act like you don't know". I'm guessing she meant that I should know us black women need weaves. I really think thats a sad way of thinking. Its like my hair cant be pretty on its own.

BW wear weaves for different reasons, some of us especialy if you are on the board wear it to grow out their hair, and other simply wnat something different and then you have those that are ashamed of their real hair, whether it's relaxed or natural.

All I know is that when I wore weaves, I did it because I thought my hair was this bad, ugly, thing that would never grow and be healthy. I was ashamed of my real hair. When I came to this site I let them go.

I know one woman, who always wears weaves, and rarely wears her real hair. But her real hair is below her shoulders maybe APL, very thick, and very healthy so I dont think its always about being ashamed because she often wore weaves that were shorter than her real hair.

To be completely honestbut I rather wear my natural 4z hair than wear a weave. I would choose a fro over wet and wavy any day. I think I my self image was lower when I wore weaves than when I didnt.
 
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yuriko

New Member
Locabouthair,
This statement reminds me of something funny I heard last year when i was in London. This is just an observation of mine. But it was fashionable to rock short hair, and many girls were just rocking their own hair, and these are my friends there, random black girls on the train or bus. Then this friend of mine comes from the States to visit and she is like, "all these girls have jacked up hair, why don't they just get a weave?
Lol, some of them did have damaged hair, but now that I think of it, they were probably letting their hair just breathe, and probably overcome the damage they had from other styles. If your hair is not perfect, other black women are the first to judge you about it. But I honestly think that most BW are trying to advise you so that you look better. Sigh.
I honestly do hope that the hair issue amongst us black women improves.
 

Kurlee

Well-Known Member
While I have no deep-seated disdain for weaves & have worn them from time to time myself, I often feel sad when I get on the bus or the train here in DC and 80% of the black women that I see have some type of extensions in her hair.

While it is true that different races dye their hair and wear extensions, there has to be a deeper psychological reason why black women are so much more apt to wear a weave and/ or relax our hair.

It may be a painful topic to think about and a sad thing to admit, but it obviously has a lot to do with the emulation of European culture.
You just don't see a large percentage of women from other cultures walking around wearing yaky-perm or Afro wigs, so let's not pretend that "all women change their hair" the way we do.

Good article.
thanks for speaking the truth
 

kblc06

Well-Known Member
TheLaurynDoll, This post was dead on especially the bolded. And until "We" come to terms with our natural hair texture "WE" will always have this problem.

ALSO, I hate to say this but I resent the statements ...."trying to look european". EUROPEANS (White folks) are not the only ones with straight hurrrrrr! I resent that we give them tooo much credit (bad spelling done intentionally)
"We" experiment because we desire different hair textures/colors/lengths; or we want to feel more excepted. It's not at all accurate to assume we're trying to be White. Micheal Jackson & Pdiddy's mom (to me) are examples trying to be white. We just want a hair texture different from our own; the desire may well be indicative of lack of satisfaction with what we have naturally; but I don't think we're trying to be white. JMHO

The bolded orange statement is very telling. Now it's nice to switch it up a bit with curls, waves, straight hair, etc, but what does it say about the majority of women in the African diaspora (and even men) when 80-85% of the population has a "preference" for hair that is very unlike their own (you could almost say the antithesis of kinky hair). What does it say when the majority of black girls born after 1980 may not know what their natural texture looks like and when chemicals (on average) are put in most young
black girls hair before age 10 (usually closer to 5 or 6).


Think about it:yep:
 

MissMeWithThatIsh

New Member
The bolded orange statement is very telling. Now it's nice to switch it up a bit with curls, waves, straight hair, etc, but what does it say about the majority of women in the African diaspora (and even men) when 80-85% of the population has a "preference" for hair that is very unlike their own (you could almost say the antithesis of kinky hair). What does it say when the majority of black girls born after 1980 may not know what their natural texture looks like and when chemicals (on average) are put in most young
black girls hair before age 10 (usually closer to 5 or 6).


Think about it:yep:


Yes but if our hair texture stands out the way it does, then I can understand the desires. We've been picked on, kicked on, and discriminated and alienated for the hair we have. We've been told it doesn't look neat and/or professional naturally left.

On the other hand, even as a natural there are many of us who talk about the incredible amount of work, patience and drive one has to have in order to have our hair maintained in its state. Our hair is work either way. It's hours of work when you're chemical free and styled or relaxed and styled.

No race gets out of bed without having to manipulate their hair in some type of manner, we just happen to work harder than most in order to see results. I don't think we would even be tripping about a different texture so much if we were able to have "low maintenance" hair that didn't seem to rebel or have a mind of its own that is time consuming and still sends across a negative image (whether we personally feel that it's negative or not).

And there are plenty of women changing their hair color, using extensions (obvious or not) and wearing wigs. Wigs were not a Black invention. There are plenty of women getting and wearing permanent curls, as well as people purposely kinkifying and texturizing their hair to have fros and dreads. The almighty Black woman is just picked at no matter what she does. Ain't nothing for us to do but keep it moving. I would prefer we all knew how to grow hair long and healthy in its natural state, but at the same time, if we don't want or have to deal with shrinkage, it's our business either way.
 

yuriko

New Member
On a different note i was talking to this long time friend of mine. And he told me that his fantasy in life is to marry a Brazilian woman, so that he can have mixed kids who have their mother's hair and skin color, and he said this with no shame. What about having a fantasy to be rich, have a big house, have beautiful healthy kids who actually look like you.. Hey I might end up marrying a white man (who knows?), but I really would like to have kids who look like me. We black people are very twisted. But its not just us.
Most white women wants to have blonde straight hair
Most Indian women wants to have straight hair (even though most of them are curly)
Most Indian women want light skin and blue/green eyes
Is self loathing just a dysfunctional part of human nature? But I think that us blacks really need to find our self love
 

flowinlocks

Well-Known Member
I agree some points are true in this article. But at the same time..I feel like this. Every other race changes their hair jsut like we do and no ever says anything to them. the only reason we are looked down upon is cause our hair is so different which is definitely not a bad thing and people feel that people are hiding it. Thats why I dont wear weaves anymore but I am relaxed so dies that make me just like a person who wear weaves i dunno. and i dont think hair weaves are not necessarily about looking white as some may say.. ask any black girl who wear weaves they would not trade being black or looking black for anything... changing your hair doesnt automatically make u look just like another race of people.. you would have to do way more than just straighten your hair... I do agree more blacks do need to accept their natural hair as beautiful but at the same dont make it seem like we hate ourselves if we want to change up a bit sometimes.. i think thats wear the problem lies.. Girls who wear weaves all the time and you never see their real hair.. but alot of that comes down to poor hair care and them not have the vast knowledge like some of us on this site.



ITA, especially the bolded. For me hair has ALWAYS been like an accessory like a belt or earrings...... yeah I know, so you about guess how many styles I've had over the years. I've been doing my hair, cutting, coloring,weaving etc. since I was 14, and it was NEVER to to look like another race. However it would be to go with what I'm wearing to a special occasion, to look different that the rest of the clones that were walking around my neighborhood, or to rock a style that I felt at that moment & didn't want to wait for it to grow out. Lol why should I? Heck by the time it grew out I'd be ready for something else. These are the reasons I wore weave ..... or not. There was I time when every girl I saw when I use to go clubbing had a jet black, butt length weave. So what did I do? Chop mine off & went platinum. I can't tell you the attention I got from men in the presence of these women & they couldn't understand it, cause I was bald compared to them:lachen:even when I wore this style black the men STILL loved it!!! The point I'm trying to make is, while some BW have a negative self image & this why they wear weave. Most don't!!! Some are just me (Sybil) with multiple personalities :lachen:The bottom line is beauty is a billion dollar industry, & if that weave to the butt, fake boobs, lips, whatever. builds your confidence THEN GO FOR IT!!! Life it too short & full of too many other waaay more serious issues. I say do what ya like, if it makes YOU feel good and don't worry about what others say, cause just like the clothes don't make the man, the hair don't make the woman. You wear the hair , it doesn't wear you!! If beauty & confidence doesn't come from the INSIDE, no matter what style you wear, you still jacked up. That's just my 2 cents.
 

Inches411

New Member
Yes but if our hair texture stands out the way it does, then I can understand the desires. We've been picked on, kicked on, and discriminated and alienated for the hair we have. We've been told it doesn't look neat and/or professional naturally left.

On the other hand, even as a natural there are many of us who talk about the incredible amount of work, patience and drive one has to have in order to have our hair maintained in its state. Our hair is work either way. It's hours of work when you're chemical free and styled or relaxed and styled.

No race gets out of bed without having to manipulate their hair in some type of manner, we just happen to work harder than most in order to see results. I don't think we would even be tripping about a different texture so much if we were able to have "low maintenance" hair that didn't seem to rebel or have a mind of its own that is time consuming and still sends across a negative image (whether we personally feel that it's negative or not).

And there are plenty of women changing their hair color, using extensions (obvious or not) and wearing wigs. Wigs were not a Black invention. There are plenty of women getting and wearing permanent curls, as well as people purposely kinkifying and texturizing their hair to have fros and dreads. The almighty Black woman is just picked at no matter what she does. Ain't nothing for us to do but keep it moving. I would prefer we all knew how to grow hair long and healthy in its natural state, but at the same time, if we don't want or have to deal with shrinkage, it's our business either way.


I totally agree with this.. Many non black women do the same thing we do as far as weaves and stuff but no one ever assumes its weaves cause you know they got the "good" hair.so ppl assume they dont and wont ever need to use that or have some type of assistance. But i have seen many of women in the hair salon that are not black take out some blonde tracks and they ahve bald spots and thinning hair that look much worst than mine. Your right no matter whether natural or relaxed we gonna get talked about .. and most of the time its from our own kind anyway.. so we really shoudlnt be pointed the finger at anyone but ourselves..
 

ebonylocs

New Member
On a different note i was talking to this long time friend of mine. And he told me that his fantasy in life is to marry a Brazilian woman, so that he can have mixed kids who have their mother's hair and skin color, and he said this with no shame.

I guess this guy doesn't know that there are a large number of black (and dark) Brazilians. I guess he thinks "Brazilian" is a race? :ohwell:

Hmmm. In these threads you always have people saying how every race of women changes up their hair but only black women are picked on for it. Yeah, obviously all races change their hair. But it is dishonest or delusional to pretend that we don't do it to the greatest degree and frequency. You know that is so when even random white friends are asking you if your hair "is yours" because that's all the experience they have PERSONALLY (including their own close friends / partners) of Black women's hair.

i once had a white guy who exclusively dates Black women tell me that over the years he has learnt at least two things about Black women: 1) that we all can't dance like everyone thinks, and 2) that our hair "isn't ours". I quickly set him straight. And his reaction was "I don't mind either way." I told him that the issue wasn't his opinion of it, but the fact that it is untrue. But really, a perspective like his doesn't come out of thin air.

At the same time, I agree with Lauryn that many BW would be content to wear their hair as is, if it weren't for the shrinkage and the tangling / difficult combing.
 

Ivonnovi

Well-Known Member
1. My point was that we give "YT" folks too much CREDIT for our styling options when clearly we look to Hispanics, Asians and others for styles.

AND

2. thelauryndoll best addressed the rest of your comment. Thank You thelauryndoll.


The bolded orange statement is very telling. Now it's nice to switch it up a bit with curls, waves, straight hair, etc, but what does it say about the majority of women in the African diaspora (and even men) when 80-85% of the population has a "preference" for hair that is very unlike their own (you could almost say the antithesis of kinky hair). What does it say when the majority of black girls born after 1980 may not know what their natural texture looks like and when chemicals (on average) are put in most young
black girls hair before age 10 (usually closer to 5 or 6).


Think about it:yep:
 

Almaz

New Member
Africans have been wearing Weaves and wigs since the beginning of time. In Egypt people just shaved their heads and wore wigs in Ancient times.
 
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