Have you ever lied to someone about how their hair looks?

[natura87]

Have you ever lied to someone about how their hair looks?

Are there times when you just tell someone what they want to hear even though they look a hot mess? Do you know someone that just went natural and....well it just doesnt look taken care of. Have you ever cosigned on someone's raggedy edges just becuase? Have you ever asked yourself "Did she let her baby cut her hair with those special scissors?".

Hair is a big deal in the Black community, and sometimes people may not want to hear what you genuinely have to say about their hair. So have any of you ever just told people what they want to hear ...?


I can't be the only one.

 

[PraisedBeauty]

No. I never do. I just tell them the truth. If they ask and they sound like they are fishing for a compliment... I serve them the truth. If they are hyping themselves up. I just nod and laugh to myself about their fading edges.

 

[Amoreofcurls]

Nope thats not even in my character...people come to me for hair and beauty advice.I will let them know the truth when asked...Also I cant have my friends walking around looking like HAMS

 

[natura87]

I'm just the type of person to nod and keep it moving when it comes to someone elses hair. I have no particular investment in the upkeep of another persons hair so unless they ask me , I'll just tell them what they want to hear. I've learned not to give out information/help unless it is specifically asked for becuase not everyone wants to hear about or go natural..and that is what I am about.

Some people are perfectly fine with what they have on their head...who am I to tell them to fix it. They'll cross that bridge when they come to it.

 

[NicWhite]

If someone asks me for my honest opinion, I give it to them. I try to be kind. There are ways to tell people that they are not looking the best without disrespecting them.

 

[PraisedBeauty]

I'm just the type of person to nod and keep it moving when it comes to someone elses hair. I have no particular investment in the upkeep of another persons hair so unless they ask me , I'll just tell them what they want to hear. I've learned not to give out information/help unless it is specifically asked for becuase not everyone wants to hear about or go natural..and that is what I am about.

Some people are perfectly fine with what they have on their head...who am I to tell them to fix it. They'll cross that bridge when they come to it.

I hear you on this. My boyfriend keeps trying to get me to talk to his sister who keeps gluing tracks into her hair and ripping it out like every two weeks.... I tried to explain to him that I can't just get up in her face and tell her about her hair. A lot of women are insecure about their hair. Some might get defensive. Some might be really hurt.

 

[natura87]

I hear you on this. My boyfriend keeps trying to get me to talk to his sister who keeps gluing tracks into her hair and ripping it out like every two weeks.... I tried to explain to him that I can't just get up in her face and tell her about her hair. A lot of women are insecure about their hair. Some might get defensive. Some might be really hurt.

So I'm not got gonna go around trying to convert everyone and buy them LHCF subsriptions. Not everyone is genuinely interested in healthy hair care If they are proud of what they are working with I cant knock their hustle, it may have taken them quite a while to get there...so I dont want to knock them down blatantly. May I suggest a few things if the convo goes that way, absolutely, but I'm not going to go around slipping packets of Sitrinillah in people's hands.

 

[PPGbubbles]

No, I am the honest friend and I expect the same.

If you ask me I will tell the truth. I am not rude tho, if I see an issue I usually have a simple suggestion to go along with it.

 

[Beautytalk69]

If you ask me..i will sure tell you the truth. Most of the time when someone ask you do they look fat..they already know the answer. As far as volunteering my opinion, I would never.

 

[Lynnerie]

People do it all the time on hair forums when people post pics. As for me, if I can't say something nice I don't say anything at all.

 

[Iluvsmuhgrass]

I'm honest without being rude. I'm not one to go out of my way to hurt someone's feelings but I'm not one to lie either. In all honesty, what I think is beautiful may not be in someone else's eyes (beauty is in the eye of the beholder type of deal.)

I've seen alot of beautiful hair on this board in ALL lengths and ALL textures. Someone's 3a can be just as beautiful to me as 4c. Buzz cut or tail bone length... it's all beautiful to me. So when I tell someone that I love their hair/grass/etc, it comes from the heart.

 

[LushLox]

I would never be critical, but someone would have to be asking me for advice first. I'm not going to be offering any unsolicited advice or anything. I would let them know what I would do to repair damage, or what I have done because I've been there myself. If it's a good friend I wouldn't have a problem in doing so either.

 

[PPGbubbles]

People do it all the time on hair forums when people post pics. As for me, if I can't say something nice I don't say anything at all.

this is sad but true.

I have viewed many threads and exited without comment

I cannot even bring myself to lie to my LHCF sisters let alone my friends in real life

ETA: you do not help someone by lying

 

[lamaria211]

ALL THE TIME or else ide have no friends and no air in my tires

 

[LilMissRed]

nope. cant do it. wouldnt want anyone to lie to me about mine either.

 

[kittikat24]

If a gals hair looks messed up and I'm trying to be nice, I FIND something nice about it...usually I hype about the color
I'm honest though, but no one really ASKS for my opinion on their hairs condition, but rather on hair care methods, so I talk about that

 

[LushLox]

this is sad but true.

I have viewed may threads and exited without comment

I cannot even bring myself to lie to my LHCF sisters let alone my friends in real life

ETA: you do not help someone by lying

Yeah, I'm not into that either.

 

[BraunSugar]

I'm tactfully honest. I'm not gonna say, "Girl, her head is to' up!!!" because there is no reason for me to be a jackass LOL. Anyway, I offer my constructive honesty where I will toss them out a suggestion to help their situation. Some are open to it, others get defensive but at least I know the defensive ones won't be seeking my opinion anytime in the near future.

 

[ManeStreet]

With my friends and family, if someone is like, "Why hair is so thin" or "I'm balding" etc. I don't chime in on the negative. I just say "Have you changed what you do to your hair or are you taking a new medication?" or say "Have you tried (insert product name here), it really worked for me".

Like if I'm getting ready to go out with friend or family member and they are like "My hair looks horrible, I can't go out, my hair looks so bad". I'm like "Gurl, slick it back in a ponytail and put on some cute earrings, cause you are workin that dress. You look cute". I look for a true statement (they really do look hott in the dress) and I focus on that. Re-affirming that somebody's hair looks bad isn't going to change the present. Me being "honest" or "real" with them isn't going to cause a genie to pop out of a bottle and magically transforem their damaged hair in an instant, that will take time. So for the moment, I'd rather make them feel good about themselves then more self-conscious.

People know what their strengths and weaknesses are, I don't find it necessary to further point it out. But that's just me.

 

[AlliCat]

No I don't see the benefit of lying...If they ask my opinion I'll be honest and try to give some constructive criticism too

 

[howyoudoin]

ill tell them the truth whether its good or bad, but i always try to use tact because i wouldn't want to them think i was putting them down.

 

[Truth]

If it looks like a chicken ran a muck in your head, and you ask me "does this look good" I will glady tell you the truth. I'm not gonna lie to you.

 

[AlliCat]

If it looks like a chicken ran a muck in your head, and you ask me "does this look good" I will glady tell you the truth. I'm not gonna lie to you.

your username is highly appropriate for your response in this thread

 

[Solitude]

Nope. People don't ask me stuff like that because they know I'm truthful and they often don't want to hear the truth.

 

[*CherryPie*]

I've lied on here a few times to NICE people. Some people can't handle the truth, and i'm not trying to ruin someone's day.....and some days I don't feel like arguing/drama, so i'll lie to keep the peace.

But I usually tell the plain truth no matter how it sounds. I tell folks on here, and in real life if something looks ridiculous....but ONLY if I think they can handle it.

The ONLY people I always tell the truth to are my daughter. I really want them to know and believe that what I tell them is the truth...always!

...andI will not have my daughters out there with ridiculous looking hair!

 

[ladysaraii]

I wont lie if they ask me how it looks and I think it looks a mess.

But if someone is showing their hair and it's not my personal tastes, I just wont say anything

 

[lala89]

I'm honest with my friends on how their hair looks. Most of them follow my advice because with the help of lhcf, my hair has gone from wispy, fine, heat damaged sl with no curl pattern at all due to damage to thick and happy almost waist length. There's only one of my friends who refuse to listen to my hair advice, she's one of those "we have different hair/you're not fully black/my hair can never do that/I can't go natural because I don't have curls" excuse type of people. We can only give others information, the way they use it is out of our control.

 

[My Friend]

It's just like seeing someones newborn......awwwwwww...she is so purrrrrty even tho you think differently.

 

[havilland]

People do it all the time on hair forums when people post pics. As for me, if I can't say something nice I don't say anything at all.

this is my philosophy as well. (unless the person begs for an honest opinion and seems sincere about wanting the truth. then i will truthfully, tactfully, reply.)

 

[MariposaSexyGirl]

If someone asks me what I think, I will be honest.