Relationships

[Nella]

I dont even know how to begin this but, this is in regards to relationships that I've had in the past and present. I guess I always get the short end of stick. I am admitting that I have prayed for GOD to send me someone meant for me and I mean that honestly.

My life is not a fairy tale....I feel like I'm going through so much. I guess I just don't know where to begin at times I have problems everywhere. Well, for the most part they aren't that big because, I have put them in GOD's hands. I pray alot. I don't go to church alot and I know the stresses that I have been through. At one point I used to go to church every sunday. Then I used to go to my sister's church. I want to find my own church within my neighborhood and I believe I will start that this Sunday. I want to get my life totally in order.

When I first started dating - my very first boyfriend. We thought he was the husband for me but, he wasn't something happened in his life and he ran off and married the girl.

I've dated different people with hopes each time that one of them was my husband. I guess I just have it all wrong. My baby's father - so many issues with him that it just wasn't possible and he had asked me to marry him. One of my male best friends back at the time I thought because, we knew and understood each other so well and always encouraged each other that he was the one. Things got rough after college graduation and then we fell out and I swear to you all I had to beg GOD to remove this man from me because, I was devastated. I just felt like I couldn't go on without him. He did as I asked and I must admit the morning after that prayer I woke up feeling like all of my burdens had been lifted from me. GOD does answer prayers.

Now I'm seeing a guy and he has some issues and right now I just want to let it go. I try to be understanding, caring, and compassionate. It just seems like I'm giving too much. He doesnt know what he wants and I just want something serious this time and I really believe that I haven't found it in him. I have told him this but, when I talk it appears that he cares but, there hasn't been a change.

So, I guess at this point I just want to be free and allow GOD to tell me. I have been praying seriously about everything and I know all prayers aren't always answered at once and if its not my time to know he won't show me. I've watched my sister, cousins, and girlfriend get married and occassionally I find myself longing for the relationships they have. I'm usually not one to be jealous but, in this department it just seems like I always get the short end of the stick. I don't want to rush anything so I'm going to be patient and let GOD do his work.

Sorry, for being so long winded but, you all are becoming like family.

Hugs n Kisses,

 

[pebbles]

Nella,

Your post really moved me. When I was in my early 20's, all of my friends and cousins were already married, and I felt like I was missing out. I made the foolish mistake of rebounding from a hurtful relationship and marrying someone who I didn't really love, and it's been downhill from there. Two failed marriages later, let me tell you, if I could go back knowing what I know now...

It's difficult to be patient, but that's exactly what God wants us to do. We have to be careful not to let ourselves make decisions that God didn't really want for us. When it's right, everything will fall into place. We won't have to fight so hard for it. I really believe that.

Let go and let God. If anything is a struggle, give it over to God and ask Him to make it clear what you should do about it. Ask the Lord to give you the courage to walk away if it's not working out, and pray that He gives you patience to wait on Him.

Be blessed!

 

[kitchen_tician]

I don't have any real advice, but always keep in mind, that what God has for you IS for YOU. If it was meant to be, it would be. God doesn't make any mistakes, and you did what you knew best at the time.

Pebbles gave great advice, just be patient and live your life to it's fullest and when you're having fun and living right, it will happen before you even realize it. As said before, people get married for the wrong reasons and often to the wrong person. Just think of this as your season to be free and enjoy all of the goodness that life has to offer. Then when that person comes along, you will know, because God has been preparing you through other relationships. These "trial" relationships and even heartache are getting you ready for the "ONE" that's for "YOU".

Just put your energy towards your child and remember that God will send you not only a special man, but a special man that will also be a good father to your childl. Don't be sad, shake it off and keep it moving. Your heart will be too busy enjoying life, to be sad and hurt. Just continue to ask God for clear guidance and patience. It will come.

As far as your spiritual walk with God, start by listening to some good inspirational music to keep your spirit in the right place. Check out Kirk Franklin's new cd and Surel. She's in my link. I hope this helps.

 

[Nella]

Pebbles and kitchen_tician,

I just wanted to thank you both for your advice and you are so right. It is time for me to LET GO AND LET GOD. You know what is amazing is yesterday I was talking to a co-worker of mines and she used that same phrase and bible scripture.

I'm definitely going to get back into the church as I spend alot of time praying and I know that I'm doing this own my own as nobody is forcing me and I want my daughter and I to be filled with the spirit of GOD.

I will pick up the cd's that were mentioned and also The Barrino Family's Gospel CD. After watching the Lifetime Movie "Life Is Not A Fairy Tale", I found there gospel music to be very good and I truly enjoyed it.

Thank you both once again as you have both touched my life in a special way.

 

[**Tasha*Love**]

Nella we are alike in alot of ways. From the job situation, having a daughter and waiting for the right relationship. I have recently met a man that I am interested in but this time is different for me. In previous relationships I felt like I HAD to make it work. My mind was always on negative thoughts and subsequently the relationships never prospered. I began to question myself and started to look within. Right now I know what I want and I am waiting on GOD to supply my needs. I don't want another fly-by-night relationship. I want the man that God has for me. If that means waiting a little longer, then so be it. I focus on my 7 year-old, finding a rewarding job, schooling and other activities.

My heart does get lonely but I know that God knows what is right for me. Like I said I have met someone but I am waiting on God's answer not my own. He's holds my future and is always looking out for my best interest. Keep your held up and keep praying. God will answer and deliver the desires of your heart.

 

[Nella]

Nella we are alike in alot of ways. From the job situation, having a daughter and waiting for the right relationship. I have recently met a man that I am interested in but this time is different for me. In previous relationships I felt like I HAD to make it work. My mind was always on negative thoughts and subsequently the relationships never prospered. I began to question myself and started to look within. Right now I know what I want and I am waiting on GOD to supply my needs. I don't want another fly-by-night relationship. I want the man that God has for me. If that means waiting a little longer, then so be it. I focus on my 7 year-old, finding a rewarding job, schooling and other activities.

My heart does get lonely but I know that God knows what is right for me. Like I said I have met someone but I am waiting on God's answer not my own. He's holds my future and is always looking out for my best interest. Keep your held up and keep praying. God will answer and deliver the desires of your heart.

Natasha, you are exactly right we are both very much alike. I feel like I've known for the last two years exactly what I want. I'm going to focus on other things so that things start happening on his time and not mine. I think I'm ready but, God will do everything for me in time. I had an interview today girl and I really think it went well. I feel so good about it. I should know if I have this job tommorow. If this is the case I'm leaving my current job and walking out on faith. I have the will and determination. I'm amazed at everything and you're right everything is about timing. He will give it to us when he know's we can handle it. Everything that we go through is for a reason and even if none of it makes any sense now it will later.

Blessings to you!

 

[Nella]

I'm sitting here hoping that I got this job. I was hoping to hear back today and although it is still early he could call before the end of the week. I am a little nervous, anxious and scared at the same time.

One of my friends at work called and told me that someone at work passed a rumor around (regarding me looking for work) so now things here are driving me crazy . I hope that you all can continue to say a prayer for me as I definitely would like to pursue a new career path and it seems like someone or something is getting in the way.

I'm on vacation and should be returning to work next week and I don't even want to go in there now that everyone know's I'm looking.

 

[Supergirl]

Nella,

I have to say that I admire the fact that you are willing to wait on the right one and not just marrying any old body for the sake of being married. Your times are in God's hands. Do you know He has already seen your wedding day? He knows exactly WHO & WHEN. Smile about that if nothing else.