So depressed!

[angeleyez09]

I have been transitioning for six months and 75% of my hair has broken off. I have no choice but to BC. But the worst part is that even my new growth is damaged because I have not been combing. I do not comb on dry hair since I learned not to here. But then when I tried to comb on wash days, I only made it through the ends of my hair because the new growth was so tangled and just snapped off. Nothing worked on detangling my natural hair so I just kept going week after week not really combing it. I guess I also did not have the right comb. I could not find the jilbere comb anywhere and I was trying to use this weird detangling comb I bought from Sallys that did not seem to work because it was the widest tooth comb I could find. My friend just put a weave in my hair and she combed my hair dry and there was so many broken hunks of hair. She was talking about how I might have to shave my head! I really don't know what I am going to do.

 

[Ganjababy]

I am really sorry about this. Do you detangle first by gently pulling the hair apart before combing?

 

[toyagurl]

Have you done any deep conditioning treatments? I would start as soon as possible. No immediate results but eventually your hair will thank you.

 

[amwcah]

Angeleyez09, sorry to hear about your set back. Why are you letting your new growth stay dry? I'm not understanding this part. Why did you let your friend comb dry hair?

Anyway, now that it is weaved up, I suggest purchasing some Luster's S-Curl activator or some water based moisturizer to keep your hair moisturized while under the weave.

Also, Sally's should have the Jilbere comb. I purchased mine from there. Ask a sales associate(sometimes they are clueless though) or try another Sally's.

 

[Leeda.the.Paladin]

I'm sorry for the difficulty you've been having. Please don't let your friend comb your hair comb your hair dry anymore. I'm wincing just thinking about it

How exactly are you combing your hair? I know you said you comb it on wet hair, but do you take very small sections saturated in conditioner? Do you comb from end to root?

 

[angeleyez09]

Have you done any deep conditioning treatments? I would start as soon as possible. No immediate results but eventually your hair will thank you.

I have been doing deep conditioning treatments. I just found the DC that works great on my hair. I will start it back up after I get out of the weave.

 

[Nubenap22]

I appologoize to hear whats been ailing you and my prayers go out for you. BUT!!! There are a lot of thing on this website that aid people and work different ways for differnt people. If you know your hair needs moisture and a certain product works then use it!!! dont try to swithc it out and expect the same result someone else got. Now as not combing or detangling, some ladies may be able to get away with not doing it so often because thats what their hair needs but what it seems liek you've done is completly dropped thing that helped you get where you were before and now have big problems with matting and serioous breakage.....learn methods to comb you hair, detangle and pamper you hair....I'm sorry if it sounded like i was preaching...

 

[angeleyez09]

Angeleyez09, sorry to hear about your set back. Why are you letting your new growth stay dry? I'm not understanding this part. Why did you let your friend comb dry hair?

I let her comb it dry because I figured that it was better than not combing it at all erplexed. And I was kinda done with my hair yesterday. Way too frustrated to care. Plus she is heavy handed and I did not want her combing my hair in its delicate state. As for my new growth staying dry, I have been trying to moisturize it though I have a feeling that when I moisturized, I was missing most of the new growth because I did not section the hair into tiny pieces. I had been co-washing often though.

 

[angeleyez09]

I'm sorry for the difficulty you've been having. Please don't let your friend comb your hair comb your hair dry anymore. I'm wincing just thinking about it

How exactly are you combing your hair? I know you said you comb it on wet hair, but do you take very small sections saturated in conditioner? Do you comb from end to root?

I do comb from end to root. . . although I never really reached the root because it took me hours to comb my ends because they were in all these knots and mats. And my hair dries in fifteen minutes so I have to keep rewetting it. It is a huge struggle to detangle and after three or four hours, my arm gets tired and I end up putting off detangling the roots until the next wash. I do comb in sections though I have a hard time putting the sections back together.

I am really sorry about this. Do you detangle first by gently pulling the hair apart before combing?

I do not finger comb it first. The one time I did it seemed like my hair was still detangled. But then I did not know you were supposed to then run it through with the comb. . .

 

[2inspireU]

Detangle your hair by getting it soaking wet, saturate it with conditioner liberally and then add oil on top of it very liberally. Do this in sections. This should help you reach your new growth and get rid of the matting, tangles, and knots.

You must get detangling down pat or you are going to have a hard time whether it is transitioning or being natural. There are naturals who stay stuck at a certain length because they lose a lot of hair detangling.

 

[beans4reezy]

When you are transitioning, moisture, moisture, and more moisture is key. Also, if you decide to go the no combing route- your hair really should be in a protective style like braids or a weave to minimize tangling. No combing isn't for everyone and can lead to disastrous results if not done with extreme care. Last summer I experimented for a week with simply cowashing, bunning, and no combing. By the end of the week I had fist sized tangles all up in my hair- never again.

Lastly, you mentioned you have been DC'ing. Have you been incorporating protien DC's as well? Right now, your hair is at it's most fragile state because it weak right at that line of demarcation (where relaxed meets natural). You need protien to keep that line strong and reduce breakage.

 

[Chaosbutterfly]

I'm not a transitioner, but just some stuff from your story stuck out to me.
1. If your hair is drying in fifteen minutes, your porosity is probably off. Are you doing ACV rinses, using porosity control, doing cold water rinses, or otherwise trying to manage it? Correcting the porosity of your hair can help will probably help with the tangles, because hair with cuticles that don't lie flat tend to snag on themselves and other hairs. And correcting your porosity can help your hair hold moisture, which will keep it from drying out so quickly, so you can detangle. IMO, all the moisturizer in the world won't help unless your hair can retain it.

2. What are your detangling methods like? Do you use any kind of aid made specifically for detangling, like Mane n Tail or Kid's Organics Detangling Lotion? And have you tried a K Cutter comb? On my stretches, it's the only comb that touches my new growth and it helps immensely.

HTH!

 

[angeleyez09]

When you are transitioning, moisture, moisture, and more moisture is key. Also, if you decide to go the no combing route- your hair really should be in a protective style like braids or a weave to minimize tangling. No combing isn't for everyone and can lead to disastrous results if not done with extreme care. Last summer I experimented for a week with simply cowashing, bunning, and no combing. By the end of the week I had fist sized tangles all up in my hair- never again.

Lastly, you mentioned you have been DC'ing. Have you been incorporating protien DC's as well? Right now, your hair is at it's most fragile state because it weak right at that line of demarcation (where relaxed meets natural). You need protien to keep that line strong and reduce breakage.

I have not protein DC'ed. I occasionally use Aphogee 2min like once every six weeks for five minutes. I am scared about the protein/moisture balance. I know I lack moisture because my hair is snapping. But I did not know if I should use a protein DC too. I was moisture DC'ing twice a week but it was only just now that I found a DC that actually worked for me (Sitrinillah).

 

[angeleyez09]

I'm not a transitioner, but just some stuff from your story stuck out to me.
1. If your hair is drying in fifteen minutes, your porosity is probably off. Are you doing ACV rinses, using porosity control, doing cold water rinses, or otherwise trying to manage it? Correcting the porosity of your hair can help will probably help with the tangles, because hair with cuticles that don't lie flat tend to snag on themselves and other hairs. And correcting your porosity can help your hair hold moisture, which will keep it from drying out so quickly, so you can detangle. IMO, all the moisturizer in the world won't help unless your hair can retain it.

2. What are your detangling methods like? Do you use any kind of aid made specifically for detangling, like Mane n Tail or Kid's Organics Detangling Lotion? And have you tried a K Cutter comb? On my stretches, it's the only comb that touches my new growth and it helps immensely.

HTH!

1. I have been using porosity control but I do not know how much to use. I have been using like a dime sized drop from the really tiny bottle. And I have been rinsing it off in hot water so I did not know if the effect was counteracted. It is winter now so I do not do cold water rinses.

2. For detangling, I just slather my hair in conditioner and try to comb it out. I have never really found anything with really good slip. I bought the Mane n Tail Detangler but I was going to wait to use it until my hair was more moisturized since it has so many cones. I will try the K Cutter. Thanks for the tip!

 

[BostonMaria]

Ouch! My scalp hurt just from reading your post. I'm so sorry this happened to you. No combing doesn't work for everybody. I couldn't go more than 24 hours without detangling my hair. One thing I've learned on these hair boards is that if something doesn't work for you then you shouldn't continue doing it.

Try finding the jiberee comb at Target, CVS, Walgreens or Walmart. You can also try a denman type of hair brush to detangle your hair. I've also been able to find a similiar jiberee type of comb at Dollar stores.

 

[curlicarib]

The best detangler I've ever found is Herbal Essence Dangerously Straight conditioner. Don't let the name fool you - it does not make your hair straight, but it does provide some serious slip that makes detangling a breeze (at least for me). Apply liberally to your hair in the shower and detangle in the shower under running water. For daily moisture, try Organic Root Stimulator Olive Oil cream. Part that hair and get it right on that new growth, then comb it through. Yes, I said comb it through - every day. Eventually you will get the hang of how often you have to detangle/comb your hair and you can adjust as needed. But for now, moisturise and comb everyday.

Good luck.

 

[brucebettye]

I am so sorry this has happened to you. I say hide your hair for a couple of months in braids, weave, or wigs and make sure to detangle your hair more often. Things can only get better.

 

[Charz]

I could not find the jilbere comb anywhere and I was trying to use this weird detangling comb I bought from Sallys that did not seem to work because it was the widest tooth comb I could find. My friend just put a weave in my hair and she combed my hair dry and there was so many broken hunks of hair. She was talking about how I might have to shave my head! I really don't know what I am going to do.

Do you still need this comb? I have one that I do not use. I can sterilize it and send it to you if you would like.

 

[locabouthair]

I agree with everyone on the detangling. I went through that a few weeks ago. I wasn't combing my hair and I was wearing a wig underneath and when I went to comb it, it was tangles and knots galore. I lost a lot of hair. Try using mane and tail detangler. That helped me.

 

[classychic1908]

1. I have been using porosity control but I do not know how much to use. I have been using like a dime sized drop from the really tiny bottle. And I have been rinsing it off in hot water so I did not know if the effect was counteracted. It is winter now so I do not do cold water rinses.

2. For detangling, I just slather my hair in conditioner and try to comb it out. I have never really found anything with really good slip. I bought the Mane n Tail Detangler but I was going to wait to use it until my hair was more moisturized since it has so many cones. I will try the K Cutter. Thanks for the tip!

A cone heavy conditioner is going to hopefully give you the slip that you need right now to detangle. Once you get the tangles under control, you can switch back to a no cone conditioner if you like. I also second the idea of getting an activator type product to keep your new growth moisturized. Good Luck!

 

[halee_J]

Do you still need this comb? I have one that I do not use. I can sterilize it and send it to you if you would like.

Thats so nice Charzboss . This is why I love this board OP, everyone has given you excellent advice so far. I just want to stress finger detangling before the comb and using lots and lots of condtioner. Its just as important as finding the right comb. Hope these tips help and hope u feel better (((hugs)))

 

[Nonie]

I haven't read what everyone has shared but I honestly believe that you can get to comb your hair "dry" if you applied a curl activator spray to the new growth and baggied. You'd part a small section, apply S Curl spray and then comb through starting with a wide tooth comb and then moving on to a finer tooth comb. In this discussion, relaxed ladies (WantNatural, Sunnydelight, HaleeJ, to name a few) shared how well curl activators help with keeping their new growth soft and manageable. IIRC WantNatural finds it to work even on 24 months post growth!!!

 

[PPGbubbles]

You have some good advice! Im just here for support

You have to relearn how to detangle and moisturize natural hair. While your weave is in moisturize you hair daily with DILUTED moisturizer to avoid build up.

Start detangling in sections then finger comb/ separate 1st then use a wide tooth comb. and take your time!!!!

 

[KinkyGenius]

A cone heavy conditioner is going to hopefully give you the slip that you need right now to detangle. Once you get the tangles under control, you can switch back to a no cone conditioner if you like. I also second the idea of getting an activator type product to keep your new growth moisturized. Good Luck!

What's an activator type product?

 

[Nonie]

What's an activator type product?

Examples:

S Curl (my favorite)

Hawaiian Silky 14-in-1 (my other favorite)

Care Free Curl

 

[vkb247]

I'm sorry to hear that you are having problems with your hair. The ladies have given you great advice for detangling your hair but since you are in a weave it is extremely important that when you take out your weave that you detangle extremely well before you add conditioner, water, or any other moisture to your hair.

Don't keep your weave in too long and make sure that you are keeping your hair moisturized (you can use an applicator bottle to get to it easier) while the weave is in. Then when you take it out try to get all of the shed hair out when its dry. There will be a good bit of it. But if you don't than it will tangle and clump up dreadfully. This has happened to me and many ladies.

 

[KnottyGurl]

First, I'm sorry to hear about your ordeal. I really understand how frustrating it is. I didn't learn how to transition successfully until my second try. I'm relaxed again, but I know how to do it if/when I transition again.

Second, I agree with this post 100%. This definitely worked for me when I was natural. I could not use a palm-sized, itty-bitty amount of conditioner. You have to really SATURATE the hair with conditioner and oil. Let it sit in for a few minutes. Then mist it or wet it a little with water (not rinse) and detangle with a Jilbere shower comb. You can also detangle in the shower under running water while rinsing out conditioner which works GREAT. Also, with natural hair, I would only comb my hair on wash days and only use the shower comb to comb my hair.

There's a thread about saturating your dry hair with conditioner, putting on a plastic cap and sitting under some heat (dryer, heating cap or wrap head with towel) for about 30 minutes. I tried it and it seems like the dry hair absorbs the conditioner better than wet hair. Then do an oil rinse and another co-wash. I would do this 5-10 times more than I shampoo. It works great and I love it! Also, keep reading any and every post about transitioning, since that the stage you're in. PM other transitioners about their regimen.

Detangle your hair by getting it soaking wet, saturate it with conditioner liberally and then add oil on top of it very liberally. Do this in sections. This should help you reach your new growth and get rid of the matting, tangles, and knots.

You must get detangling down pat or you are going to have a hard time whether it is transitioning or being natural. There are naturals who stay stuck at a certain length because they lose a lot of hair detangling.

 

[hillytmj]

I recommend saturating your dry hair in oil and you will be able to detangle the hair in small sections. I have done this before when my hair was matted and filled with single strand knots. Your hair needs to literally be dripping wet with oil; you may need to put a plastic cap on so you won't soil your clothes or furniture. I've used olive oil to do this in the past, but I'm sure you can use any oil.


Afterwards, you can wash and DC as usual.

 

[ilah]

2inspireu - girl!!!!!
Thank you for that bit of info - I'm going to be taking micros out and detagling this way will save my hair. Thank you!

 

[amwcah]

Do you still need this comb? I have one that I do not use. I can sterilize it and send it to you if you would like.

That is very nice of you Charzboss!