My 1st white stylist as a Natural

isawstars

isawstars

Well-Known Member
I'm in a new, big city and don't have a car. Fortunately, there are a few reputable salons in walking distance so I went in and made an appointment to get a wash, flat iron, and thorough trim (which I need BADLY).

The front desk greeted me before the door shut behind me--that's a pleasant surprise! She recommended a stylist named Laurie, who appeared very open-minded and not afraid to do my hair.

Laurie is white, has thick colored hair, and has a few clients who are relaxed. She refers to them as "my girls." She tells me, "My girls are relaxed and come in for dry trims. But I can flat iron your hair if you'd like, it's just more time consuming of course." "Some ladies are just very particular about how their hair is blow dried and flat ironed..."

My hair is currently straight and in a high bun... but reverting badly, lol. So she asked me about my texture. "Are you natural?" "How tight are your curls?" "How long is your hair?" Then we talked about hair products they carry. She told me some line I've never heard of... that she wants to use on me because it's sulfate-free and extremely moisturizing. Then she showed me the Moroccan oil that she recommends for me. We talked about different oils that she and "her girls" use. I was impressed, but I wish I had asked if she's relaxed hair before.... to see if she knows what she's getting herself into. <--I mean this in reference to new growth. I am not getting a relaxer

I haven't seen a stylist since November 2011. So I know I need a legit trim but I am scared! I've made up my mind that I'm going through with this anyways because I've been trimming my hair and it's gotten to the point where my own trims are not holding up anymore.

I'm not great at flat ironing... I don't detangle well enough for someone to comb through my hair and trim.

I read older LHCF posts about ladies using white stylists and would just like some tips. Or hear any naturals who's gotten a blow out from a white stylist to calm my nerves or to give advice if anything went wrong in that experience.

I got good vibes from Lauren and the salon. I'm just nervous since it's been almost 2 years since I've sat in a salon chair. ...Thursday's the day.

TIA
 
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I've had a relaxer from a white stylist. I went to her for 6 months. The best relaxer experience I ever had. It never burned and it didn't revert back quickly. This is pre natural days though and pre flat iron. But she treated me well. I only stopped going to her because she couldn't curl my hair, which was really, really short.

I don't know if she can handle your hair. But from the sound of it, it does sound like you will be respected and that she will keep you involved in the process. It doesn't sound like she will rip through your hair or cut of 5" when you ask for a trim.
 
faithVA said:
I've had a relaxer from a white stylist. I went to her for 6 months. The best relaxer experience I ever had. It never burned and it didn't revert back quickly. This is pre natural days though and pre flat iron. But she treated me well. I only stopped going to her because she couldn't curl my hair, which was really, really short.

I don't know if she can handle your hair. But from the sound of it, it does sound like you will be respected and that she will keep you involved in the process. It doesn't sound like she will rip through your hair or cut of 5" when you ask for a trim.
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faithVA

Ripping through my hair is my biggest concerns. And my other is flat ironing on a high temperature is my 2nd concern.

I guess I should think of ways to correct her if it happens. That way I won't sit there in shock and not say anything. We've all heard those horror stories.
 
isawstars said:
faithVA

Ripping through my hair is my biggest concerns. And my other is flat ironing on a high temperature is my 2nd concern.

I guess I should think of ways to correct her if it happens. That way I won't sit there in shock and not say anything.
Click to expand...

She has already shown that she will talk to you. Take your combs with you. And tell her before she starts what your concerns are. I don't think you have anything to be afraid of. Ask her what heat setting she will use.

She already said her girls are picky about their blow outs and flat irons, so this isn't news to her. But you have to speak up for yourself.

If I had gone to most of black salons here they wouldn't have even bothered to have that conversation with me.
 
isawstars - It sounds like the stylist you spoke with has a genuine love of doing hair; to me that's important. Usually people like that are willing to listen and continue to learn. Plus they are not afraid to be honest with you (if a technique, color, etc may not work for your hair). They want to keep their customers happy and coming back for more.

I would just bring up whatever concerns you may have with her before she starts on your hair. My best experiences was with a hair dresser that gave me 1-1 attention, never turned me away from the mirror and didn't skimp on the conditioner. Good luck!
 
I went to a hair cuttery one time to get a trim and my stylist was very knowledgeable as well and she didn't chop my hair off which was a plus.

sent from my galaxy
 
isawstars, I don't trust stylists as far as I can throw them. (Heck, even when I respect them and think they are trustworthy--like Reniece--I'm not putting myself in their hands so I am really not the person to ask coz I'm so negative where they are concerned.) But I suggest you exaggerate your scalp sensitivity. Let her know you have a very low pain tolerance so to be gentle. That way she'll comb your hair as if combing a baby's.

And do not be like me who put so much confidence in a stylist coz everyone told me how great she was, that I let her work on me away from a mirror. Most of all, don't worry about offending her, if you feel uneasy about anything at all, speak up. Remember she is serving YOU. She owes you a good experience and you will be paying for that service. I'm not saying be a jerk but if you see something that gives you pause, a smoking flat iron or whatever, ask.

I've heard that places like Hair Cuttery never hack off more than you ask and most of the stylists are white so hopefully your experience will be similar.

Personally, if I was worried about tangles, I'd take the time to comb through my hair thoroughly to remove shed hair and braid each combed out section to keep it from tangling. I mean part narrow sections about 1/4 - 1/2 an inch wide and make sure a fine tooth comb can go through it several times. Even when my hair is shrunken I can get a seamless fine-tooth comb through it, so when I went to that SHS who hacked my hair off, I wasn't worried about her having trouble combing my hair coz I knew she'd not encounter any snags. But if you exaggerate your sensitivity, you can at least trust that the stylist will be uber gentle.

If you have a friend who can accompany you, that will even be better. Just having another set of eyes a trust looking over what's being done and giving some feedback or even asking questions on my behalf regarding things I may not be able to see would make me feel a lot more comfortable.

Say a prayer that if this is not a good idea, you'll know in good time. I wish you the best.
 
isawstars

I've never gotten my hair done by a white female, but have gotten my hair done by a white male on more than one occasion. In my experience, the white males are so much more attentive to our needs. I think it may be because they have an understanding on how important our hair is too us. Though i've never gotten a relaxer from any of them, I have had them flat iron my hair before. These guys did a fabulous job. I think white males are much more attentive and they seem to so much more gentle and follow directions well. The only downfall I've had with them is that they tend to work much much slower. So in my experience, they are not the ones to go to if you are in a rush.

But in general, expect a lot of questions! And don't be afraid to voice your concerns. And don't be surprised if they fawn over your hair. The white males I've gone to get so excited when working with natural hair because they love how much you can do with it.
 
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Nonie
Nonie said:
Say a prayer that if this is not a good idea, you'll know in good time. I wish you the best.
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:lachen: When I read that one line in your post, I felt like I was about to lose not only my hair... but my own life and die. :lol:

You did give me the idea to blow dry my hair before going and just have her flat iron... I'm seriously considering that. The only reason why I want her to wash my hair is because I miss getting DCs under a dryer :lick: ... because I don't have a hooded dryer anymore
 
isawstars said:
@Nonie


:lachen: When I read that one line in your post, I felt like I was about to lose not only my hair... but my own life and die. :lol:

You did give me the idea to blow dry my hair before going and just have her flat iron... I'm seriously considering that. The only reason why I want her to wash my hair is because I miss getting DCs under a dryer :lick: ... because I don't have a hooded dryer anymore
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:lachen: Girl, stylists scare me so I probably view this as being just as dangerous as walking into a field full of landmines. :lol:

isawstars, yes, do that! Hair dryers meh! Nothing special about them. I could understand wanting your hair washed coz you want a massage by someone else but dryers? Girl, safety of your hair before luxury. :bat: Don't make me come after you taking risks for a blinking dryer. You can enjoy that another time...after you guys have become an item. This is your first date. Don't give her full control. So yeah, blow dry and just have her flat iron. The only thing I'd do if I were you is ask her what to use. Stylists have their own list of products that guarantee a good press so...she may really want to do the wash. Let her know that you're doing this blow dry coz you're worried about your tender scalp so want to be prepared to make it easy for her. Why I say ask, is you don't want to use something that will make it hard for her to give you good results.
 
I have mostly positive experiences with white stylists, however I haven't used a stylist since my bc almost two years ago.
I did go to a beauty school twice this year to get a rollerset, both were complete fails but I blame two reasons.
A) it was a beauty school
B) usually I am able to walk them through whatever procedure were doing, I was as clueless as they were

Aslong as you speak up and let them know what to and how you will be fine
 
The sad part is white stylists are usually insured, so they have to know what they are doing. If she has black clients already, regardless of styling preference, she has respect did black hair and for the black head with it.

When I was debating on getting a keratin treatment, I went to a white salon and the white stylist told me "Oh, I'll do your hair!" And I thought to myself, you think you could lol. And she spoke to me. No one has ever done that. SPEAK TO ME!!!! It make a big difference. Anyway, give her a try. The white stylists are the ones we sleep on and they be the people who know out hair better than out own.

And they use better equipment, not running to rite-aid buying the cheapest flat iron/blow dryer/combs/hair products that will save them a buck!

Sent from my Gramatically Incorrect iPhone
 
tmhuggiebear said:
isawstars

I've never gotten my hair done by a white female, but have gotten my hair done by a white male on more than one occasion. In my experience, the white males are so much more attentive to our needs.
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^^This!

I had my hair done by a white male stylist once (back when I was transitioning). He was my age-ish, straight, had tats and everything lol.
Not only was he gently, he was just sooo sweet. I tell you, I got a SCALP MASSAGE, A HOT OIL TREATMENT, A BLOWDRY and A FLATIRON. For like $15...I kid you not. I tipped like a beast.

The price was low because he was a junior stylists at an established salon so he was just learning. I could also tell that he had probably never seen "transitioning" hair before, because when the water touched my hair and it started to shrink up, he had a look like :eh: ..."Holy...crap. What just happened? What did I just do? Did it Malfunction?"

:lol:

but he did a GREAT job, very gentle and attentive...much better than this one horror show of a stylist who tried to flatiron my NOT-detangled, damp hair on the highest heat setting :nono: This is kinda getting into another story, so to make a long story short, I walked outta that place with damp/frizzy freshly highlighted hair. She was a black female stylist btw

just goes to show...you can't judge a book by its cover
 
naturalmanenyc

My lawd... Those pictures were not as bad as I imagined... In fact, the pictures were WORSE than I expected it to be. I cannot believe how quickly it reverted. Just wow. :nono:

genesislocks

FIFTEEN DOLLARS? at an established salon?? Whaa! I didn't realize junior stylists were that cheap! Did you have to walk him through styling though? Just curious. Because even I have a hard time being extremely gentle with my hair lol.


So ladies,

I've decided to just let her flat iron and trim. I am DCing and washing my hair tonight... sleep with braids. Then tomorrow I will blow dry using the tension method before walking over to the salon. I really like Nonie 's analogy of this being a "first date." :lol: I'm going to take my mizani anti-humidy flat iron spray... just incase. My appointment is at 2:15pm (Pacific).

Wish me luck.
 
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isawstars

Here in NYC, the white statist charge more and know more because they are insured. They cannot take chances on your hair and mess up. They have to know what they are doing and if not you can sue them. The black and Dominican owned salons don't work that way, so there is always a risk and that's why they are flip-floppy

Sent from my Gramatically Incorrect iPhone
 
The best blow out and flat iron I ever received was from a white stylist named Brittney. My hair was brushed back into a bun and I explained to her that my natural hair is very curly. She then revealed to me that she has super curly hair (though I would've never been able to tell because it was so nicely straightened) and has some experience with it. We talked about my hair and what I wanted and she definitely delivered. My hair was so soft. It lasted me a lot longer than when I do it myself. I plan on seeing Brittney again some time in the summer.

On the other spectrum. The white stylist I saw before here didn't seem to know what to do with my hair. She was sort of my last resort. She flat ironed my hair and afterwards it was so dry and poofy that I ended up going back home and redoing it myself taking care to add moisture.

But with what you've said, Lauren seems pretty knowledgeable, open minded, and ready to receive your concerns and desires with your hair. I would give her a try.
 
I haven't read any other responses (I'm watching Unsung and extremely distracted by Johnny Gill's jheri curl :yep:), but I'll be happy to give any advice I can.

First, I'm not anti-stylist. I have two stylists that I trust to trim and do other stuff that I don't do myself (or when I just don't feel like doing my hair). I think even if you are a DIY, you should have a trusted go-to professional for just-in-case situations at the very least.

With that being said, it sounds like she is knowledgeable about textured hair and is open to discussion. I think if you're very clear about what you want up front and what your concerns are, you'll have a successful appointment.
 
:) I'm very interested in knowing how it went. I live in a small town that is predominantly white and I don't always have time to drive 45 minutes out to the city for a black stylist... Who may or may not do a very good job.

Normally I wear braids so I had to go to the city if I didn't do it myself. But I've decided to let go of my braids in favor of sew ins or wearing my hair down and I really need a good stylist to relax and trim my hair.
 
I'm relaxed but my stylist is a WW, she used to do my hair about 16 years ago and I lost touch with her when I moved, last year I made it my mission to find her, my hair and I are very happy to have her back in our lives. She relaxes and trims my hair for me 3 x per year she treats my hair the way I expect it to be treated, we discus my hair and the condition of my scalp/any scratching before we start. Did I mention she is always ready and waiting for me when I walk into the salon? I have never had to wait on her once.

Your stylist sounds knowledgeable and respectful so hopefully you should have a good experience and you love your results.
 
Caramelangel247
Dayjoy
Dak

So sorry for taking forever! Things have been chaotic. I didn't even have time to wash and blow dry my hair before going to Laurie so I just walked in and had her do the entire process.

I arrived to my appointment 10 minutes early and my stylist, Laurie was ready for me. She was so excited, it was really cute. As I took down my bun she was in awe by how long and soft it was... it was only APL so I didn't understand what the big deal was. But whatever, it still made me feel good. While she fluffed my hair she asked me if I ever wore my hair in this wild state... :lol: The she asked me what my concerns were about my hair. I told her that I haven't had a professional trim in over a year and my ends were sticking together. She said that my hair wasn't too uneven but some of my length is making hair look really thin. She wasn't positive about what is causing my ends to stick together. She said it could be extremely dry ends or the last bit of my texlaxed ends that are still hanging on. She asked if it was okay to cut a little more and I told her, yes. I think she's right about the texlaxed ends. I'm done hanging on to those couple inches that are left.

She sent me to the shampoo bowl with her assistant with very specific instructions. I think the girl was nervous because she kept asking laurie questions. They used Redkin All Soft Shampoo and Conditioner. I requested to DC underneath the dryer for 15 minutes. Laurie had the girl use a mix of Redkin All Soft and some other brand I cannot pronounce. I was worried that my hair would be extremely tangled from having them wash it... but to my surprise it wasn't at all. Laurie even told me that my hair wasn't tangled almost as if she was surprised as well.

They got me a beverage when I returned to her chair and Laurie's assistant sat behind us and watched lol. I didn't mind at all. Laurie applied Morrocan oil serum to each section of hair as she trimmed my hair. She quickly figured out that cutting my hair wet is not going to work. :lol: I probably should have told her but I was really curious about her approach.

I was in SHOCK when she started blow drying my hair using the tension method. She was extremely gentle when combing out the tangles before flat ironing. She used Morrocan oil before flat ironing each section. She had the iron set on 400 but I asked her to turn it down to 350 and she didn't mind. The only issue I had is that she flat ironed each section 4-5 times. She simply did not have the technique to flat iron natural hair silky straight.

My hair was poofy when she finished but I love the cut. My hair looked 10x better! I really needed to get rid of those ends! At first I was a little sad that I'm back to CBL but I really needed that cut and I don't regret giving her permission to cut a bit more.

Sadly my hair reverted in hours. I put it in a bun as soon as I left the shop because I just felt it getting bigger and bigger which is strange because California doesn't have much humidity compared to my hometown back east. Maybe I should have given her my Mizani thermastrength to flat iron but I'm not sure if it would have made a difference since she doesn't have the proper technique. I don't know. She did ask me how I styled my hair. But I didn't want to get all technical in fear of sounding like I should have done it myself.

OH. Funny thing: Laurie and I figured out we live in the same condo building... in fact she lives on MY FLOOR. Like 4 doors down from me. After discovering this she said, "Oh wow! Well... I REALLY hope you like your hair cut!" :lachen: She was a lot of fun to chat with.

Although I was extremely impressed with how gentle she was, the tension method and the great service... I don't think it was worth $95. I know this is California but my stylist back east only charged $80 for my natural hair and made it relaxer straight. It was originally $65 for a shampoo, flat iron and cut but then I saw Laurie add an additional $30. I didn't say anything because I think it's common for natural services and she's not used to the labor needed for natural hair. I could tell she got tired lol. Fortunately it was only in there a little over 2 hours! Still pretty fast in comparison to other shops.

Would I do it again? Yes. But next time I am flat ironing my hair before going in for a service.

photo-7_zpsa20a427b.jpg



One hour later....

photo-8_zps86b6b55d.jpg
 
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I went to a white stylist before I went natural and she was the best stylist I've ever encountered. She tried to convince me to go natural-- I absolutely refused. She told me I had "good" hair (not something I was used to hearing) and to treat it like silk (said slow down on the extensions). She taught me about co-washing way before I ever saw a hair board. She introduced regular deep conditioning (and on dry hair) to me, and protein treatments. I wish I could find her so I could show her my hair now! ETA: I just saw your post above. She flat ironed on way too low of a temperature to expect straight hair. That's no surprise. My hair would laugh at 350 :yep: and so did yours. If you plan to flat iron your hair before the service then what is the stylist for? I bet you could learn how to trim your own hair. There are thousands of ladies on this site doing it. I bet they can give you some tips. Anyhoo, your hair does look nice and thick above. I bet that trim really thickened your situation.
 
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Prior to my big chop, I found a white stylist who maintained my pixie while I self relaxed. Now when I need to dust my ends, I blow my hair out and she takes her time to go through and only dust the ends. She's super gentle and asks me for tips as she goes.
 
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