Every Black Man's Dream

What I Think Black Men Want

  • Long hair~mid shoulder blades

    Votes: 265 99.3%
  • Short hair

    Votes: 2 0.7%

  • Total voters
    267
  • Poll closed .

Moopeh

New Member
Men are attracted to beauty. If you look beautiful that is the visual dreams. For a lot of women long hair makes them look more feminine, more attractive. Some look gorgeous with short hair.

At the end of the day it's about looking good.
 

niqu92

New Member
im saying this because of my personal experience, but i think men regardless of race prefer longer hair. When you see a black girl with long healthy hair thats not a weave it attracts a lot of attention,even from girls. let me put it this way..if two girls walked into a room&one had long shiny bsl-mbl hair and the other had a short pixie cut i can almost gaurentee the girl with the long hair would get the most stares/attention from guys.
practicly all the black guys i know say they'll only date a black girl if she has long hair that isnt fake....which is kind of sad but hey, thats what most of them prefer
 

LittleLuxe

New Member
I'm sorry but some of the men's responses sounded like some ignorant bullcrap.

"All that works when you are single sister. Sure I’ll holla at a bald chick if I like it. But when you are in a relationship such a drastic change will get you the Chris Brown treatment. You can’t make drastic decision on your looks OR ANYTHING when you are someone’s LIFE PARTNER.

I'm sorry but what??? And I know some fool ain't trying to compare a HAIRCUT to a serious decision requiring a LIFE PARTNER. Shoot...you want to talk life partner, I've got a list for you before you try to talk about my hair.

There is no you, just us. We are not telling you that you can never got natural, once you have been nice and nap free. But there should be a conversation about this and were WE as a couple are going with your hair. What are we looking to accomplish by going short or natural? How long with this phase last? Will you wig it?

...where WE as a COUPLE are going with MY HAIR? ...well I can tell YOU where YOU will be going with YOUR BUTT if you really try to tell me "Honey I don't think WE'RE ready for you to go natural, you know...as a couple" Phase...ugh please let the door hit you on the way out.

Men
"Ladies, follow this advice at your own risk. This advice ties directly into point 10. which is"

Women who think they can do WHATEVER they want – These are the women screaming at the promoter outside the club. These are the women who will break things in your house because they are having a temper tantrum. These are the women who say things like, “And I will tell him to do it, and he will do that ish.” These are the women who end up at the Chesapeake Rest Area because their man didn’t make it out of Maryland before he put her out the Range.

...yeah because me not letting you run me like a 12 yr old girl equates to me breaking everything in your house. Gosh, how do you survive being that dumb?

but either way, i’ve been known to say to a girl, “if you cut your hair, i’m breaking up with you.” i was only half-serious. but that 50% was from the heart SON."

Honestly that sounds like a blessing to me. Any man who's going to break up with me over a haircut sure isn't going to stand by my side if I get sick, get into an accident, develop cancer or become ill in some other way.

It's dudes like that who make me feel like cutting my hair so short and just rocking it, I don't plan to grow my hair to impress dudes too stupid to have an open mind or perceive anything past what they think is the one and only truth. Buh-bye, don't have time to play with little boys.
 

beautyaddict1913

Well-Known Member
I only read a few posts, forgive me lol! But these days men are just so happy to run across a woman who wears her own hair. When I protective styled 24/7 my guy friends would tease me and say "do u have hair? how long is ur hair? why dont u wear ur real hair?" or when they called me on the phone they would say "where are u? buying hair?" lol

When I send guys pics of my length checks they drool lol or if Im around them with my hair straightened they touch it a million times and are shocked. So men like long hair but its by no means a "make or break quality" If you ask an old southern woman this question she will tell u "aint no man EVER asked me for no hair" In other words, they ask for something else lol (yall know lol)
 

NYDiva

Well-Known Member
actually what they were saying about making drastic changes to your looks without talking to your s.o., i agree with.........in a serious leading to marriage or are married relationship. people like what they like, and if your s.o. has expressed that they like how you have your hair now, and then you go and do the opposite, they could very well believe that you couldn't care less what they think.

My h. cut off his mustache one day, lol, and when i saw it my draw dropped, because i had expressed how much i looooved it. and when he just shaved it off, to me that said 'who cares what you think'. granted, a mustache grows back faster than a head of hair, but still.

It doesn't mean that as an individual you can't ultimately do what you like with your appearance, but if you don't care what your s.o. thinks........why have one? and this isn't someone telling you to change something, it's someone telling you they like how you look now. it's not about someone telling you what you can't do, but just that 'gee i'd like to know you're about to chop off 10 inches before you do it.
 

nikolite

Well-Known Member
I think most men view our hair in a similar way that we view their hair. We want it kept neat and clean, whether its dreads, a fro, chunky twists, clean-shaven or a caesar. I prefer a small fro with a mean shape-up, thin sideburns, and a nice fade-out at the neck, but a fine man with a beautiful smile, personality, and bangin' body with dreads (which I don't prefer) wouldn't curb my interest. Of course, since us women are usually the objects of beauty, there is more emphasis on our looks in general, but most men can't resist a ton of other stuff about us (our eyes, smile, smell, asses, shapes, skin, voices, etc.) before they can let some hair scare them away.

Hair is just an accessory--its not the first, second, or even third thing on a man's mind.

Plus these days everyone and their mama is wearing a long weave on a regular basis, and I don't think long hair looks as glamorous as it used to since most men can't tell the difference yet they are aware that many women are wearing weaves. Somehow, APL to BSL length straight hair is the norm now on the heads I see. I agree @beautyaddict1913, most black men are just fiending for real hair at the moment, in whatever state that it's in.
 

bimtheduck

Active Member
I think it depends. I LOVE sassy, short haircuts but I dont have one because my face face is way too fat and round. I do know that my man loves him some long hair.
 

omegachick31

New Member
....I have always found it wise not to think for others but instead ask what they think.

Because I try to live what I speak....

Me to my Black Man: Do you think long hair is every Black Man's Dream?

My Black Man: No, not every black man

Me to my Black Man: Do you think long hair is most Black Men's Dream?

My Black Man: I don't know, probably....

....Next.....
 

Shadiyah

Well-Known Member
I can say this for sure and certain... men like hair that is well kept.... done!! looking fly!! and a lot of times why black men like short cuts is because it is fresh.. they love long hair but long hair that is done.. even if they are dreads, twist or straight... I had a friend who husbad insist she kept her hair cut off like a man because she was lazy in doing her hair... would he had like to see long hair? if it was kept fly??
 

DivaD04

New Member
my black man LOVE long hair. He hates short hair. I have short hair. I have 2 mid length lace wigs. He'll live.
 

brg240

Well-Known Member
Idk know about every black men's fantasy my older brother only likes curly hair of various lengths or fades if you have the face to pull it off. Other men in my family well their preference is not really short hair. I mean I don't think they hate it but both my mom and bro's gf cut their long hair to really short and well they weren't happy.

I will say I almost exclusively get hit on when I wear my my hair down. (guess men don't like buns) And for black men I generally get compliments along with it like your hair is so pretty and long.
 
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Britt

Well-Known Member
I think that Black men like hair that looks good... period... However, since I've been a child I've always seen them have a liking or admiration for black women who wear their own hair, and especially if it's long. So yes, I think that statement puts it correctly "black man's dream"..... this is why you see so many of them fawn over women w/ 3c hair and higher. I find that especially younger black men def have a penchant for liking long hair, it def gives us an extra 'umph'. Growing up, hell even now :lol:, I know dudes who will usually only date black girls/women w/ at least shoulder length hair. When I was a teenager and early 20s, dudes were bold about only wanting chicks w/ long hair. My younger brother is 21 and only messes w/ chicks with long hair and usually 3c and higher, eventhough his arse is a 4a/b :rolleyes:.
 

EllePixie

New Member
Regardless of race, men have a preference for longer hair. Now, to them, long isn't what we think is long - I think they do fine with SL to BSL. They always prefer if it's yours as well - weave is more of a deal breaker for a man than short hair. It comes from the "standard" of beauty in society...I hate generalizations, but overall, that's just the way it is. However, short hair usually won't deter a man from dating a woman, and we also need to take into account that a short relaxed style (like Halle's) is totally different from a TWA.

A couple of examples...as my hair grew, one of my male friends came over and I hadn't seen him in a few months. When I answered the door he goes, "OH! What'd you do to make your hair look more feminine?" My reply was..."Ummm, it grew?" followed by a heavy side eye.

Also, my ex was well aware of my obsession with my hair, and was (too) honest about how he felt about long vs. short hair. He told me that anything above shoulder length is too short (prefer, not deal breaker), but he liked my hair and knew I was growing it out. THEN, he was like, "Yea, I can't date a 'bald' chick though." I jokingly showed him pictures of my BC when my hair was like an inch, and he gave a visible lip curl of disgust and says, "Yea...ummm..." When I had a relaxer, I cut my SL hair to about chin length like a Posh bob, and I LOVED my hair, yet he was like, "Ew, why'd you cut your hair?" We no longer speak.

Of course men gave me compliments when I had one inch of hair - "Dang girl, you are rockin' that short cut!" but the men who know me were more likely to say, "What the heck did you cut all your hair off for? Are you okay?"
 

arosieworld

Thanks 4 our nail *****!
I have 5 adult brothers and all have said no matter how cute a girl looks with short hair her man will secretly want it long. They all felt the need to tell me this when I was bald or had short hair and then would say not to use a weave either because to quote the youngest of the bunch that just means your hair is short, will never be long and you are sensitive about it. Of course I told him that is not true, I wore weave for years but he said weave equals hassle somehow someway, he's a moron but he seems to speak for all of the men with the common sense not to say anything.
 

Curlee_lurker

LA face/low class booty
Sheesh it was something said in passing. What would some of you prefer her to say? "38% of men of African decent would appreciate the length of that".

One of my co-workers tells me what he likes all the time and it's the opposite of me...yet I catch him gazing at me all the time. I've yet to have a guy that's showing interest in me say he doesn't prefer what I have...but I see them show interest in women not like my at all. Do you think he's telling the tall chocolate chic with the bob that he likes a long hair thick redbone? Probably not.

None of you are trying to grow long hair because you think it'd be sexy? That's quite intriguing.
 

helixhoney

New Member
I can agree that longer hair on women might be something considered attractive across cultures. As far as black men, I think many of them do cherish long hair. But so do many black women. Hey, look at me, paying to belong to an online forum dedicated to growing long hair. Yep, and I do it without regret, too:)

But I wont say that having short hair is deal breaker. I find that men's "deal breakers" when it comes to physical beauty is pretty individual to that man. Some absolutely won't date a woman with short hair. And some absolutely won't date a woman with a small butt, a big butt, small breasts, a huge rack, etc. Yeah, there might be some ideal of beauty out there, and that ideal involves lots of hair, but most guys I know don't expect perfection, they just want you to look good to them, and they got their own list of physical priorities going on in their head.

Also, I think many black folks erroneously mistake long hair for mixed ancestry, which is almost a genetic standard of beauty in the black community, in my opinion. I don't think it's a coincidence that when men find out that my hair is not a weave, their eyes shine with excitement as they ask their next question: "You mixed with Indian?" It's terrible, but it's true.
 

RegaLady

New Member
Yeah I asked Dh and he isn't worked up over long hair. He really isn't. That's not to say he wouldn't think a woman is attractive who happens to have long hair or he wouldn't look. He just isn't caught up in hair like that. But that's him. Not many men are like him :).
 

CurlyMoo

Well-Known Member
Yes it's true. Black men are men and share the same desires as other men when it comes to what makes a women desireable. Not all of them have the same tastes but hands down I would say most men of all races perfer long hair on women. I would say MBL is probably ideal. But to be specific, Black men want it long and for it to be real. However, I do believe the Black men are more likely than any other race to actually like short hair on women, (considering so many of us have short hair) and some just accept it because they figure many of us can't grow it long anyhow.
 
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CurlyMoo

Well-Known Member
The only hair discussions I’ve seen men engage in all centered on “real” versus “fake” hair; the long and short of it, so to speak, didn’t appear to be a relevant factor.

Probably because they encounter so much fake hair they will take any length as long as it's real. But if it were not for that the discussion would have been short vs. long and relaxed vs natural; like it used to be.
 

CurlyMoo

Well-Known Member
I'm with the camp that says guys just want it to make you look good. If most guys preferred long hair, what was all the hoopla when Halle had it in a bob? They drooled over it because IT MADE HER LOOK GOOD (well she always looked good I mean it enhanced her features)

It just has to look good. Healthy and well maintained.

That's because Halle Berry is the dream girl for many Black men. The same with other women who wore that hair style like Nia Long, Toni Braxton and Anita Baker. I don't think anyone is saying Black men aren't attracted to women with pixie or bob hairstyles. The question is what do they really want. Halle looks great in that bob and she is very attractive. The very short hair cuts along with the right makeup showcase your features.

Many Black men like that style on women because it probably reminds them of their adolecence like when they hit puberty staring at Halle Berry, Nia Long and Tony Braxton posters. The same can be said for many White men and the Fariah Faucett poster.
 

SequinsAndAbsinthe

Well-Known Member
Oh dear, it a hard one because taste is individual but we also known its driven by socially accepted norms, stereotypes and environmental conditioning.

I knew a girl with long hair once who looked just like a horse. Black beauty, we used to call her. And yep, a guy I fancied LOVED her. Trust me, it wasn't her sparkling personality nor the junk in her trunk that did it - definitely her lovely luscious hair.

But like anything else, I think its all a matter of that thing called TASTE. In my household it goes like this.

Younger bro no. 1 loves weaves, the faker the better. If u have a pink weave he'll mary u. It it better be Rupanzel-ey or he won't be interested. He was also into crayons until age 12 so that explains that.

Younger bro no. 2 loves TWAs and shorter relaxed styles because in his generation (bar Beyonce) all the popular celeb ladies and DJs sport those dos. Keri Hilson, Rihanna etc. He thinks long hair is dull and stopped complimenting my hairstyles when I straighten my hair and its APL

Dad loves really short afros, dunno where that comes from but he's Zambian and in that country length = nothing special, we'd rather concern ourselves with a cute smile or eyes or ***!!!

But yeah, TASTE def comes into play. Its like how some women like men with long hair. I personally gag when I see men with long hair.
 

PureSilver

Well-Known Member
Most guys I date like clean, real hair. Emphasis on real hair -short or long.


I find that most men i know really do prefer us Jamaican women wearing our own hair wether it be relaxed or natural, not only that they tend to have a preference for long hair, no baldies:nono: preferably no TWA unless it's styled nicely. There is a saying among some Jamaican men that goes "my woman must have hair on her head"(in reference to the baldies).
 

BLESSED1

New Member
i've been told by men that they prefer long hair
i think they're hardwired to, taking it back to cavemen times
but the length of the hair doesn't matter when your naked
so when you're w/your dude but having a bad hair day, do what i do: get naked ;)

*BLESSED1 runs her silly arse out of thread, contributing nothing*
 

RegaLady

New Member
i've been told by men that they prefer long hair
i think they're hardwired to, taking it back to cavemen times
but the length of the hair doesn't matter when your naked
so when you're w/your dude but having a bad hair day, do what i do: get naked ;)

*BLESSED1 runs her silly arse out of thread, contributing nothing*

I think this is a myth that stuck and sold, and its a bunch of bull:ohwell:. What 'cave' are they referring too? NO doubt 'they' as in Europeans did research on their own history which dates back to 'cavemen' times. African women always wore their hair short which is why I think its is more forgiving on us than Europeans. Which is why some black men like it on us. I don't think they deal with shot hair cause they 'have to'. I think they deal with it because just like the Hottentot Venus body with the big but and narrow waist which is so admired in the black culture is beautiful, so can short hair be on a black woman, its genetic.
 

Mz.MoMo5235

Well-Known Member
most men i know prefer long hair. i say prefer because its not a deal breaker usually. if a chick is hot she's hot you know. but if you have the same chick (twins lets say) and one had short hair and the other long but both equally hot... a good number of men would probably point to the long haired one and say "i want that one"

just my thoughts
 

Jewell

New Member
I've NEVER had a man (of any race) say that he PREFERRED short hair on a woman. Most are more attracted to you if you have long vs. short, but that is not a slight against short hair. I know I had MBL hair, cut it to ear length in 07 and my new bf (black male) kept remarking (dang, you shouldn't have cut your hair)...but mind now he NEVER saw me with my long hair. He met me AFTER it was short, but I assume he was envisioning how much more he would like my aesthetic, if I still had the long hair.

If blk men didn't prefer long hair, weaves would not be as popular among blk women as they are.
 
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