No Sex till marriage....okay, what about sexual compatibility?

[Shimmie]

Lovely Angels, you are exactly that and more. You deserve only the very best in this life and God DOES have it for each of you. And it's not a Secret, nor anything that you have to 'muster' up. Just let God bring him in.

 

[firecracker]

But angels after my divorce (I married in my teens - pregnant), I ended up in 3 relationships, each one wishing this was the 'one'. Only to wish afterwards, that I never gave 'it' up to them.

Yeah I had one of those moments last year right after the act.

I got saved during the 3rd relationship and fell in love with another man...His name is Jesus.

Now thats the MAN.

Wow I have had several celibate moments and years in my life but never that long. So what yo cobwebs older than mine. Well keep holding on cuz a change w/marriage first is gon come for sure. It will be the best too. Go head now!

 

[Belle Du Jour]

So you ended up with the man you were dreaming about? That's very cool.

 

[Shimmie]

Wow I have had several celibate moments and years in my life but never that long. So what yo cobwebs older than mine. Well keep holding on cuz a change w/marriage first is gon come for sure. It will be the best too. Go head now!

"Fire", I KNEW that you'd be here to see this first. I knew it. I'm so glad that I trusted the instinct from God to 'speak' out to you. You always make my day with your honest reactions. How can I not love you? And I do...{{{{Hugs }}}}.

NOW, as for those cobwebs.... Girl, your are too much. I've never been afraid of spiders...

 

[Shimmie]

Here's one of the scriptures that I've lived on for years.

In Psalm 16 - "...He counsels my reins in the night seasons."

"Classimami", one of my constant prayers at night is this, based on Psalm 16. "Lord, I thank you that you give me sweet counsel in the night.

While I am sleeping, you instruct me; Lord, you tell me what to do. When I awake, it will be among the living, my footsteps, my thoughts are ordered of you." And for this I thank you...In Jesus' name...Amen.

"Classi", He never fails me. I've been through so much in this life; not once has He ever failed me. Men have--- both male and female, both Black and White; but not Jesus, 'Classi', not Him...not ever. And never will He fail you. Not ever. It matters not what you need or what you want, He will not fail you.

Loving hugs...

 

[Shimmie]

Dearest Ones for whom I pray. I promised to post the marriage prayer for singles. Just be assured, with hearts like yours, God has no problem answering the desire of your heart to be married. That's what He created and designed us for. And in your prayers thank God as follows:

" Lord, I thank you that I will be as you have 'such' created". (This scripture you find in Ephesians 2).

Whatever you do, allow God to be first.

Such as, "Father, only you can give me the desire of my heart to be a wife and to give glory to you as such. I will not bow to the world but unto you."

Dear Father, bless me as you did Hannah when she asked you for a son, you answered her prayer and blessed her with Samuel, which means, "...because I asked the Lord for him."

Lord because "I asked", you will answer, for your word says, 'If I ask anything according to your will, you will hear me and when I know that you hear me, I can expect you to answer, 'yes'' to my request. For a happy, loving, fruitful marriage is Your will and Your will shall be done in, here on earth, in my life, as it is in Heaven.

I promise to allow my marriage to give you glory. To you I surrender all short comings that are in me and in my husband. To be the wife that you created me to be. And to allow my husband to be the man you created and designed him to be.

Father, take over my life from this day forward. To you, I surrender all. Let your will be done and not my will.

Please protect me from all counterfeits. Please allow only the right man to come into my path and into my life to make me his wife. When he comes you will prove to me beyond a doubt that he is the one. I promise to ask you first, before I surrender my heart, allowing you to be my leader and guide in all truth.

In Jesus' name, Amen and Amen.

Angels, there is no magic pattern or prayer, you are simply putting it there in God's hands. Then let it come from Him. And it will, "Because you asked" just as Hannah did and God said, yes.

I will post another prayer tomorrow. All we are doing is coming together as one, for each other, believing God.

Loving blessings and Sweet sleep to each of you. Dream of Him; the One without sin, and then the him who is yet to be. Amen.

 

[firecracker]

Aww Shimmer thanks for the awesome prayers. I love you too Ms Lady .

 

[pebbles]

Dearest Ones for whom I pray. I promised to post the marriage prayer for singles. Just be assured, with hearts like yours, God has no problem answering the desire of your heart to be married. That's what He created and designed us for. And in your prayers thank God as follows:

" Lord, I thank you that I will be as you have 'such' created". (This scripture you find in Ephesians 2).

Whatever you do, allow God to be first.

Such as, "Father, only you can give me the desire of my heart to be a wife and to give glory to you as such. I will not bow to the world but unto you."

Dear Father, bless me as you did Hannah when she asked you for a son, you answered her prayer and blessed her with Samuel, which means, "...because I asked the Lord for him."

Lord because "I asked", you will answer, for your word says, 'If I ask anything according to your will, you will hear me and when I know that you hear me, I can expect you to answer, 'yes'' to my request. For a happy, loving, fruitful marriage is Your will and Your will shall be done in, here on earth, in my life, as it is in Heaven.

I promise to allow my marriage to give you glory. To you I surrender all short comings that are in me and in my husband. To be the wife that you created me to be. And to allow my husband to be the man you created and designed him to be.

Father, take over my life from this day forward. To you, I surrender all. Let your will be done and not my will.

Please protect me from all counterfeits. Please allow only the right man to come into my path and into my life to make me his wife. When he comes you will prove to me beyond a doubt that he is the one. I promise to ask you first, before I surrender my heart, allowing you to be my leader and guide in all truth.

In Jesus' name, Amen and Amen.

Angels, there is no magic pattern or prayer, you are simply putting it there in God's hands. Then let it come from Him. And it will, "Because you asked" just as Hannah did and God said, yes.

I will post another prayer tomorrow. All we are doing is coming together as one, for each other, believing God.

Loving blessings and Sweet sleep to each of you. Dream of Him; the One without sin, and then the him who is yet to be. Amen.

Shimmie, I just wanted to tell you that you are a REAL blessing! Thank-you for posting such a beautiful prayer!

 

[Shimmie]

Shimmie, I just wanted to tell you that you are a REAL blessing! Thank-you for posting such a beautiful prayer!

Pebbles each of us have so much to give to one another here. I discovered this thread the other day at work, and when I came across your first post, I had to print out this entire thread.

Pebs', I began to read it all while on the train coming home. I couldn't put it down. Your response was truly from the heart of God our Father. There were many members who posted whose names I didn't recognize. But they are women who are not afraid to give God the glory.

"Fire" (Firecracker ) told me you are one of Christians that she highly respects in this forum. Your manner of sharing God's love is easy to receive. I see exactly what she means. You have a peaceful spirit...even in the midst... of all of this .

You give meaning to God's word, "Iron Shapens Iron." Thank you for intervening for me, yesterday.

Loving hugs...

 

[pebbles]

Thank-you so much, Shimmie! Loving hugs to you as well, sis!!

 

[Shimmie]

I agree w Shimmie wholeheartedly. But it's easier said than done. Now that I have the maturity, I don't feel horrible for just saying 'no' or putting it out there early that 'I dont get down like that'

but its hard when he puts you in that mood...

I have abstained from sex for 1 year an 4 months. Not to say to brag, but to let you know that I've known both sides of the coin..

Hey Sweet Angel, don't feel bad. Personally, I could be 'classified' as always in the 'mood' and without any help from him... I am an incurable 'Romantic' and I love it. I love Romance. But the key is "Desire". I have a very strong Desire that God was inbeding into my spirit for all these 24 years of being celibate and it comes down to this. Do I 'Desire' him for 'now' or the beauty of 'Forever'.

I choose, "Forever".

Choosing 'now' has no promise of "Forever"...choosing 'now' may last only 2-3 minutes of 'wow' and with the remaining 23 hours and 58 minutes filled with wondering how long will he still be in it. erplexed So the 'now' is not so 'wow'...

I want 'more' than I had in the past relationships I had with men before. As a woman, God took so much time to create me. I look at the wonder of how both me and my future husband were created...inside and out.

My 'Desire', during the times when I want him 'now', instead I want him 'Forever' and into Eternity with Jesus.

My lovng prayer to every woman, enjoy the beauty of being his mystery, you will never lose him to anyone else. God won't allow it. "That which is His, will never be plucked out of God's hands..." Who'd dare to steal your man from God?

Your screen name says it all...You are one Beautiful 'Tuff Cookie"...

And so all the rest of you wonderful ladies..."Desire Forever"...

Love to each of you...

 

[Supergirl]

Hey Sweet Angel, don't feel bad. Personally, I could be 'classified' as always in the 'mood' and without any help from him... I am an incurable 'Romantic' and I love it. I love Romance. But the key is "Desire". I have a very strong Desire that God was inbeding into my spirit for all these 24 years of being celibate and it comes down to this. Do I 'Desire' him for 'now' or the beauty of 'Forever'.

I choose, "Forever".

Choosing 'now' has no promise of "Forever"...choosing 'now' may last only 2-3 minutes of 'wow' and with the remaining 23 hours and 58 minutes filled with wondering how long will he still be in it. erplexed So the 'now' is not so 'wow'...

I want 'more' than I had in the past relationships I had with men before. As a woman, God took so much time to create me. I look at the wonder of how both me and my future husband were created...inside and out.

My 'Desire', during the times when I want him 'now', instead I want him 'Forever' and into Eternity with Jesus.

My lovng prayer to every woman, enjoy the beauty of being his mystery, you will never lose him to anyone else. God won't allow it. "That which is His, will never be plucked out of God's hands..." Who'd dare to steal your man from God?

Your screen name says it all...You are one Beautiful 'Tuff Cookie"...

And so all the rest of you wonderful ladies..."Desire Forever"...

Love to each of you...

Let the church say AMEN.

 

[AnnDriena_]

I've heard the "compatibility" arguement over and over and always I feel the same.

Certain things need to be discussed before marriage. Such as does he consider "compatibility" to be him ignoring you all day and not really carrying his share of the load and then pushing up on you like your supposed to be in the mood to please him or does he (and I say he because I know it goes both ways but it's usually the man who has the more active sex drive and is easier to get in the mood) plan on taking some initiative and actually using foreplay for what it's for..to get you in the mood and would you be open to getting in the mood.

As for whether or not either one of you will be "good" at it.Practice makes perfect. Are you both willing to practice?

And this answer is not popular among women but really if your not in the mood you can fake it.
If he is not in the mood you need to look into pharmaceutical help so you can get what you want.

Those who are having all this sex outside of marriage and think it will be just fine once they get married. I would think twice. Sex drives change and the routine of marriage helps it to change. And many times the stress and responsibility of marriage don't lend a sex life to being the exciting do it up against the wall days of yore. And if you want your sex life to be that way it doesn't need to start before marriage.

And I personally don't want to be well practiced when I get married. I want us both to discover things about the actual act of sex and sex with each other.

And even if this sounds strange to some I don't want to have anyone to compare my husband to. And he won't have to worry he's not as good as many other guys in the world who've run through my bedroom. I'll be able to enjoy him for him.

 

[Shimmie]

I've heard the "compatibility" arguement over and over and always I feel the same.

Certain things need to be discussed before marriage. Such as does he consider "compatibility" to be him ignoring you all day and not really carrying his share of the load and then pushing up on you like your supposed to be in the mood to please him or does he (and I say he because I know it goes both ways but it's usually the man who has the more active sex drive and is easier to get in the mood) plan on taking some initiative and actually using foreplay for what it's for..to get you in the mood and would you be open to getting in the mood.

As for whether or not either one of you will be "good" at it.Practice makes perfect. Are you both willing to practice?

And this answer is not popular among women but really if your not in the mood you can fake it.
If he is not in the mood you need to look into pharmaceutical help so you can get what you want.

Those who are having all this sex outside of marriage and think it will be just fine once they get married. I would think twice. Sex drives change and the routine of marriage helps it to change. And many times the stress and responsibility of marriage don't lend a sex life to being the exciting do it up against the wall days of yore. And if you want your sex life to be that way it doesn't need to start before marriage.

And I personally don't want to be well practiced when I get married. I want us both to discover things about the actual act of sex and sex with each other.

And even if this sounds strange to some I don't want to have anyone to compare my husband to. And he won't have to worry he's not as good as many other guys in the world who've run through my bedroom. I'll be able to enjoy him for him.

So well said. So VERY well said.

 

[pebbles]

That was a really nice post, AnnDriena.

 

[AnnDriena_]

Thank you. I'm glad I didnt' upset anyone. I also had another thought that sums up this question all others like it. You know the what ifs' and what about this" questions.

I'm NOT trying to bite off the head of the person who originally posted this question but this is on my heart.

He is GOD. Trust that he has already taken care of this. I say this because I've heard so many questions like this. What if this, What if that. Like God hasn't already thought of this and of that. It's like saying "The sun is so hot what if it falls out of the sky and burns us all to death?" Not trying to be funny but overexagerrating for illustration. Trust me, HE'S THOUGHT OF EVERYTHING.
And then we hear all the excuses and "really good" reasons for people disobeying and going against him. yes against him. If you're not for him, you're against him.
There are no excuses. Either He is LORD OF all or he isn't LORD AT all.
There is no such thing as "kind of" sinning.

And one more thing. I think our society is so pornified we have this misconception that we are supposed to be having the same reaction and hair pulling, screaming at the top of our lungs "fake" sex that is being thrown at us to sell everything from gum to music.

"Compatibility" has become this mythical term for being perfect together. And then when someones' sex drives changes. Yes that happens. What happens to your compatibility? You have to do what GOD originally intended for you to do anyway. You have to love and work with your spouse to learn what pleases them. Just like with two virgins will initially be doing anyway.

 

[pebbles]

Nope, no heads should feel bitten off. Your post really does give one cause to think and ask if we're really trusting God or making our own provisions. It's a fair statement and one to be considered seriously.

 

[Shimmie]

Thank you. I'm glad I didnt' upset anyone. I also had another thought that sums up this question all others like it. You know the what ifs' and what about this" questions.

I'm NOT trying to bite off the head of the person who originally posted this question but this is on my heart.

He is GOD. Trust that he has already taken care of this. I say this because I've heard so many questions like this. What if this, What if that. Like God hasn't already thought of this and of that. It's like saying "The sun is so hot what if it falls out of the sky and burns us all to death?" Not trying to be funny but overexagerrating for illustration. Trust me, HE'S THOUGHT OF EVERYTHING.

And then we hear all the excuses and "really good" reasons for people disobeying and going against him. yes against him. If you're not for him, you're against him.
There are no excuses. Either He is LORD OF all or he isn't LORD AT all.
There is no such thing as "kind of" sinning.

And one more thing. I think our society is so pornified we have this misconception that we are supposed to be having the same reaction and hair pulling, screaming at the top of our lungs "fake" sex that is being thrown at us to sell everything from gum to music.
"Compatibility" has become this mythical term for being perfect together. And then when someones' sex drives changes. Yes that happens. What happens to your compatibility? You have to do what GOD originally intended for you to do anyway. You have to love and work with your spouse to learn what pleases them. Just like with two virgins will initially be doing anyway.

AnnDriena, you are speaking nothing but the truth. I support you 1000%. And your Father in heaven backs you up even more.

Why 'pitty-pat' someone on the head straight to hell, telling them that it's okay to believe a lie? You are only telling them the truth. And the truth must be told. Expose the myth of 'what if'' for what it is, a blatant, outright lie of deception. This what if's and why's are only deceiving tricks of the devil to get someone to yield to the flesh.

You know the devil is going to use every subtle and not so subtle device and scheme to make wrong appear justified. All of these 'what if's' is exactly that, false justifications and nothing less. A false justification to get one locked up in sin. And his whole purpose is to shame us as Christians; minimize our integrity to the world.

Don't we have enough of this mess in the news already? So-called preachers in adultery, and all other kinds of sexual sin. I'm tired of it!!! And I'm not judging, for this judges itsself -- as we can all see with the consequences of sexual sins running rampant. It's a self-exposing sin that judges itsself and those who participate in it. Period!

What others don't see is that 'yeilding' to this lie is no different than any other reason a person chooses to have premarital sex. The 'what's if's' are no different than emotional 'foreplay' -- whatever it takes to manipulate our mindset to think this reason makes it right to have sex outside of marriage.

The bottomline is that a person is just plain looking for and / or justifying their desires to satisfy a sexual urge. If this were not so, there would not be any need for any question of 'what if'. We're not stupid. The devil may be stupid, but we're not. Get real with ourselves and just face and acknowledge what is really going on and then deal with it, God's way.

God's way is: Sex is for marriage and marriage is ordained of God as between a man and a woman - ONLY. If one wants to have sex, get married. I Corinthians 7, makes it perfectly clear that it is better to marry than to burn...meaning in passion and hell. It's just that plain and simple.

AnnDriena, just keep telling the truth and don't you ever apologize for it. I can't be more supportive of you and others like you. I'm sick of people playing games. When something is wrong, just don't do it. It's elementary; it doesn't take a college degree to figure it out. I'm sick of people 'playing' Christian. Coming into churches, playing the praise games and then living like the devil.

If you're going to call yourself a Christian, than let your light so shine as such and stop playing around with fire and misleading others into watered down ethics. That's why the world disrepects our faith. Too many people have worn our label on tattered ethics.

What makes it sadder, it that other religions have stricter guidelines and yet they are followed.

Again, AnnDriena, you are a Light that we need in the Body of Christ. Thank you for your boldness; thank you for your pureness, thank you for your honesty. Don't ever back down and shut up. Keep sharing the truth and share it boldly. God is proud of you for waking people up to the deceptions of false justifications, when in truth, it is only an excuse to yield to sin.

Just to clarify...I'm speaking the truth. The only head I've bitten off is the devils and without remorse.

 

[kisz4tj]

All of these 'what if's' is exactly that, false justifications and nothing less.
Don't we have enough of this mess in the news already? So-called preachers in adultery, and all other kinds of sexual sin. I'm tired of it!!! And I'm not judging, for this judges itsself -- as we can all see with the consequences of sexual sins running rampant. It's a self-exposing sin that judges itsself and those who participate in it. Period!

emotional 'foreplay' -- whatever it takes to manipulate our mindset to think this reason makes it right to have sex outside of marriage. [/B][/COLOR]

The bottomline is that a person would this be me....I'm the OP is just plain looking for and / or justifying their desires to satisfy a sexual urge. If this were not so, there would not be any need for any question of 'what if'. IF only life were that simple

I so wish this thread would die already. I’d quote AnnDriena also but I don’t have the strength to do so. My what if’s weren’t fantasy day dreams…they were my reality. Nor was it a not so slick ploy to give into my flesh. STICK A FORK IN ME!

 

[Shimmie]

I so wish this thread would die already. I’d quote AnnDriena also but I don’t have the strength to do so. My what if’s weren’t fantasy day dreams…they were my reality. Nor was it a not so slick ploy to give into my flesh. STICK A FORK IN ME!

This is not about you, Kisz4tj. I promise this is not about you. It's the subject at hand. And you should stand up and take a bow for being the vessel to bring up this very timely and necessary subject.

Kisz4, it is so NEEDED in the Body of Christ. You don't know the impact and the importance of this subject which you originated. It was a while back and you have come full circle in your life. We ALL question the reasons, and had you not had the heart and the courage to come forth with this question, the enemy would still be out there tricking people with his deceptions.

I stand up and I applaude you. Do hear me? I applaude you. For we have to expose the devils tricks and schemes which he is using to keep us bound and in dire straights.

I tell you in truth, you are the champion here. No matter how it 'appeared' to say otherwise, you are the champion. For you created the platform to speak out a question that no one else dared to do.

Take a bow...this is not a play on words. You are highly regarded in God's favor, for each time you posed the questions of 'what if's', we -- including -- you were taking the devil down with his lies.

I cannot thank God for you more, for who you are in His kingdom. Be at peace, you are not the subject in question...and never will you be.

This is not about you...Angel. Only the devils deception. We in the Body have been 'fooled' by him long enough. With loving thanks to you, his sexual lie has been exposed.

Loving hugs...

 

[Shimmie]

An Apology to the OP...

Your post is doing a wonderful thing. Please be proud of yourself.

Whatever I have stated or made appear to the contrary, I apologize.

With all of the threads that don't honor 'our' faith, you came up with one that challenges and shakes the very foundation that satan thought he could fool us with. You have opened the platform to tear down his lies.

God could not be more prouder of you, for your boldness to start that thread. For it opened the door for Him to shine through.

Keep shining for you have truly shined a needed light for the Body of Christ to follow in the path of Jesus.

 

[caligirl]

I only know 1 person period who is a virgin and she happens to be in her mid 30's but not because she is such a faithful Christian, she's a good girl but I dont even think she goes to church and I've never heard her talk about God, but because she's been about 300 pds and not very attractive her whole life and nobody wanted it. That in itself is a miracle to me since even the fatest ugliest people can get laid. She just lost over 100 pds and is dying to give it up! :eyebrows2

Not being mean just telling the truth.

well dag! could you make it any plainer?!

 

[thiccknlong]

If two people truly love each, they will want to satisfy each other sexually. I have never heard of these sexual problems b/w couples who are 100% giving and loving to each other. Me and DH were akward at first, but he was willing to do and try anything to please me sexually. And I the same. Did your husband try to do things that pleased YOU sexually and not just himself?

re:the girl that got married who is misearble sexually
Same issue applies. Is her husband a God-fearing loving and giving man? Also, I find sometimes, due to poor information, women come to the marriage with hangups which affects their sexual experiece (i.e. mom says she never liked it, sex is more pleasurable for a man, its painful, its a chore, etc.). These hangups are not the husband's fault.

ETA: Either God is able or He's not. If this is the man God chose for you, and you went into this marriage prayed up, then you know everything will work out. When you get married outside the will of God, you are asking for trouble.

I love your response ! If 2 ppl are truly in love with each and want to please each other, it can be done.

You can be kept if you WANT to be kept. But, you have to work at it....anyway, I do plan to wait. Although, I'm scared to tell him this up front...i think i'll leave that for later

 

[Shardonay11]

I'm probably gonna get chewed out here, but I am not married (yet) and have been with my boyfriend of 3 years and I would never, never, get married to someone I was not sexually compatiable with. In my opinion, that is a serious mistake waiting to happen. My current relationship, Thank God is not like that. My last relationship, which last 4 1/2 years, we were not sexually compatiable and it was frustrating and unsatisfying. I was very often left wanting... Why I stayed with him so long? Well, I loved that fool- see I was a good girlfriend! LOL. But after we broke up, I took care not to make that mistake again, life was too short to be that unsatisfied. I made sure with my current boyfriend, that if I did not even like the way he kissed, it would go no further. And we discussed sexual relations prior to us having relations and found that were both open-minded and liked the same things- we were evenly "yoked" when it came to that! LOL.

I was asked once how important sex is in a relationship and marriage; well for me, the sex is 50 %, good communication, compromise , respect and understanding is the other 50%. No disrespect for those saving themselves before marriage but I would seriously kick myself if I waited so long and then waited to dtd in my marriage bed only to be left like , "Damn, i could have had a V-8...."

With that said, I'm out! *****running out of thread******

You won't be getting chewed out from me because I completely agree. I am married, but my husband and I was having sex before our marriage. My husband comes from a real religous southern family that view me as the anti-christ because of our pre-marriage sexual realationship. (His brother still remains a virgin and he 30+ and sister was one before she got married)
The whole of his female family, to this day they see me as the sex kitten, and litterly hold on to there men. It kinda funny when I think about it. Anyway, I would never change the physical relationship my husband and me had before marriage. I think it important to explore that aveune. I too could not image being sexually unsatified for life. Honesty, I would probably cheat. Good sex can get you through some hard times, it not something to play with in my book.

 

[Shimmie]

You won't be getting chewed out from me because I completely agree. I am married, but my husband and I was having sex before our marriage. My husband comes from a real religous southern family that view me as the anti-christ because of our pre-marriage sexual realationship. (His brother still remains a virgin and he 30+ and sister was one before she got married)

The whole of his female family, to this day they see me as the sex kitten, and litterly hold on to there men. It kinda funny when I think about it. Anyway, I would never change the physical relationship my husband and me had before marriage. I think it important to explore that aveune. I too could not image being sexually unsatified for life. Honesty, I would probably cheat. Good sex can get you through some hard times, it not something to play with in my book.

I gotta ask you...

How did his family 'know' that you were having sex before you were married? Who told?

God bless you angel...

 

[He_Leads_I_follow]

I have been saved and single for 9 years and have been living according to God's word for 7 (wholly abstinent being one). In the last 2 years, someone very close to me began to pursue me. Something didn't seem right but later I agreed. The Lord actually showed me this encounter in a dream before he approached me (warning #1). Well, we didn't know what "this" was because at the time others in our prayer group were being drawn away. [Clearly an attack on the group but we all were too arrogant to heed the FOREWARNING of the attack from our leaders.] FOOLISH!

Well, we had walked together in the same intercessory prayer group for 4 years at the time. So we went to our spirtual leaders of our prayer group and shared it with them to weigh it. One of them being male said "this could blow up in your face". The other being female said "shut it down now. Don't play with it". (Warning #2).

We stepped back by just talking now and then. Then he would come over and we would watch movies from time to time. A little leaven... After awhile I hugged him. This may seem like nothing to most of you but intimate hugging opens doors. Especially when you're so arrogant as we were to think we would not fall into error. Because we knew the other loved the Lord and hated sin, we trusted each other . We really thought we were safe and saved enough to be alone. Little did we realize the scriptures were true "in the flesh dwells NO GOOD THING.If it had been any other person, we would have never allowed ourselves to be in this position

Your flesh can dupe you into making the wrong choice. It's like a twillight anestesia. You're asleep but not fully so you think you're fine. You think you're still awake. A sleep walker may be up and walking around but they are not awake!

Soon after it went from intimate hugging to passionate kissing. Then it escalated ofcourse to clothes on simulated sex. We would stop when it was too much (as if we hadn't already crossed that line). We have probably had at least 10 encounters like that. I remember the first time we had gone that far, after that time I felt bonded to him and he did to. It amazed me how a soul tie can happen even without penetration.

It hasn't gone any further but the stronghold that has been setup in my mind from this thing is worse than if it had gone all the way. My thoughtlife had become corrupted and my prayer life flacid and weak. We are both called to greater things and are greatly asahmed at our behaviour. We carried on as if God could not see. As if the Holy Spirit was not in us. Would the Holy Spirit participate in such perversion. NEVER. We don't want to be like Saul. After awhile Saul did not know that the Spirit of the Lord departed from Him. We could be going through the religious motions and never relaize (but others will see because your fruit does bear witness) that we had no spirtual power and authority. Our prayers for others would have been rendered useless because if you regard iniquity in your heart, He will not hear you.

Fleeing youthful lusts,
He Leads

 

[Supergirl]

I have been saved and single for 9 years and have been living according to God's word for 7 (wholly abstinent being one). In the last 2 years, someone very close to me began to pursue me. Something didn't seem right but later I agreed. The Lord actually showed me this encounter in a dream before he approached me (warning #1). Well, we didn't know what "this" was because at the time others in our prayer group were being drawn away. [Clearly an attack on the group but we all were too arrogant to heed the FOREWARNING of the attack from our leaders.] FOOLISH!

Well, we had walked together in the same intercessory prayer group for 4 years at the time. So we went to our spirtual leaders of our prayer group and shared it with them to weigh it. One of them being male said "this could blow up in your face". The other being female said "shut it down now. Don't play with it". (Warning #2).

We stepped back by just talking now and then. Then he would come over and we would watch movies from time to time. A little leaven... After awhile I hugged him. This may seem like nothing to most of you but intimate hugging opens doors. Especially when you're so arrogant as we were to think we would not fall into error. Because we knew the other loved the Lord and hated sin, we trusted each other . We really thought we were safe and saved enough to be alone. Little did we realize the scriptures were true "in the flesh dwells NO GOOD THING.If it had been any other person, we would have never allowed ourselves to be in this position

Your flesh can dupe you into making the wrong choice. It's like a twillight anestesia. You're asleep but not fully so you think you're fine. You think you're still awake. A sleep walker may be up and walking around but they are not awake!

Soon after it went from intimate hugging to passionate kissing. Then it escalated ofcourse to clothes on simulated sex. We would stop when it was too much (as if we hadn't already crossed that line). We have probably had at least 10 encounters like that. I remember the first time we had gone that far, after that time I felt bonded to him and he did to. It amazed me how a soul tie can happen even without penetration.

It hasn't gone any further but the stronghold that has been setup in my mind from this thing is worse than if it had gone all the way. My thoughtlife had become corrupted and my prayer life flacid and weak. We are both called to greater things and are greatly asahmed at our behaviour. We carried on as if God could not see. As if the Holy Spirit was not in us. Would the Holy Spirit participate in such perversion. NEVER. We don't want to be like Saul. After awhile Saul did not know that the Spirit of the Lord departed from Him. We could be going through the religious motions and never relaize (but others will see because your fruit does bear witness) that we had no spirtual power and authority. Our prayers for others would have been rendered useless because if you regard iniquity in your heart, He will not hear you.

Fleeing youthful lusts,
He Leads

I appreciate your honesty and I understand every word. I think some people would read this and think "What's wrong with that?" But with the Spirit in your heart, I know this just cannot sit well. I hope you will be able to get back on track and back to where you know is best for you at this stage. Best wishes and blessings.

 

[He_Leads_I_follow]

Thank you for the encouragement Supergirl.

Blessings unto you
Shalom

 

[secretdiamond]

WOW. I am leaving this one alone..... erplexed I am a born again Christian and far from a virgin. Although, I am a virgin again in the eyes of the lord. What about people like me who knows what they are missing and have a boyfriend (3 1/2 Yrs together). We stopped having sex because I am born again, but at the same time how long can it last. This is a question I know the answer to, "until marriage." But the reality of it is things happen and not everyone’s spirits are not strong enough to fight of everything the body wants. I have to struggle everyday with withdrawals form the things I enjoyed. If I slip I know my Father (God) will forgive me, but that is between Messiah and I. Some answers aren't black and white, there is just gray. We live life in the gray area.

This is me right now. I have so many q's about this, but I'm leaving it alone. erplexed

 

[star]

Remember their are different levels of Christians and some are in name only. If you are a growing Christian and have read the Bible at some point it has never been a secret that fornication is a sin. Now whether you believe it or not does not change God's word. We all have had to struggle with this but as we GROW in God and become closer to him having sex outside marriage leaves a sense of guilt. There is no way you getting closer and closer to God and enjoy any kind of sin. And, fornication is the worse as stated in the Bible because you are sinning aganist your own body.

We cannot water down the word and pick what we want we all must make up our minds whom we want to serve and strive to get there. I rather hear someone who is a known fornicator not say anything on this subject than to promote sin. People respect you when you respect God. Does not mean you understand everything or even like it but just because God said that settles it.

Promoting any kind of sin to say it is OK shows the level of Christian maturity in the person and although it is between you and God it does change the fact that it is wrong or sin. God loves you too much to keep you in sin or ignorance especially since the world is watching people who confessed to be Christians. We(Christians) are the only Bible some people will ever read. People look at what you DO rather than what you say.