Question For Celibate Folks

Discussion in 'Christian Fellowship' started by janiebaby, Sep 21, 2017.

?

Kissing before marriage

  1. No

    5 vote(s)
    41.7%
  2. Yes

    7 vote(s)
    58.3%
  1. janiebaby

    janiebaby Well-Known Member

    Blog Posts:
    0
    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2006
    Messages:
    14,513
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    33,893
    Trophy Points:
    113
    So I'm wondering for people who are celibate (my definition: consciously choosing to abstain from sex once you're in a relationship), were celibate or are thinking about becoming celibate....

    How do you/did you feel about kissing the person you intended to marry before the wedding day?

    I'm thinking, and it may change, that it might me a no go for me. I'm very sexual and I feel like kissing can be sexual. I don't even know how to give a quick peck (honest) so I guess it's something I'd have to train myself how to do? I mean a kiss on the cheek could be ok but me kissing someone on the lips?? It can start innocently and linger a bit too long. :look:

    Eta: I dont take internet offense too easily so say what you want to say how you want to say it. Just say it plainly :lol:
     
    Last edited: Sep 21, 2017
    Choclatcotton likes this.
  2. Shimmie

    Shimmie "God is the Only Truth -- Period" Staff Member

    Blog Posts:
    0
    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2006
    Messages:
    33,518
    Likes Received:
    63,039
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    "Deep in His Heart"
    Don't go down that path! If kissing is your weakness, don't allow yourself to be in that situation.
     
    fifi134, momi, newgrowth15 and 3 others like this.
  3. Black Ambrosia

    Black Ambrosia Well-Known Member

    Blog Posts:
    0
    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2008
    Messages:
    12,037
    Likes Received:
    89,338
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    Building a Beginning
    I think you should follow your gut but this seems extreme.
     
    Godsdaughter001 and janiebaby like this.
  4. janiebaby

    janiebaby Well-Known Member

    Blog Posts:
    0
    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2006
    Messages:
    14,513
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    33,893
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Truuuust me I hear you because it sounds like it to me to and I definitely think each person is different so I'm not against it at all. However me, with my weaknesses, I think it might be too tempting and I want to make a conscious decision.
     
    Maracuj√° and Black Ambrosia like this.
  5. janiebaby

    janiebaby Well-Known Member

    Blog Posts:
    0
    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2006
    Messages:
    14,513
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    33,893
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Im on a similar line of thinking "don't put yourself in tempting situations". I don't think it'll lead to sex right then and there however I can see me letting my defenses down and justifying putting myself in more and more tempting situations or fantasizing. So yea I'm thinking kissing may be my gateway drug or like the backdoor (one of maybe several that haven't been identified yet) into letting my guard down sexually.

    @Shimmie don't forget to vote
     
    Last edited: Sep 21, 2017
    Black Ambrosia and Shimmie like this.
  6. Shimmie

    Shimmie "God is the Only Truth -- Period" Staff Member

    Blog Posts:
    0
    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2006
    Messages:
    33,518
    Likes Received:
    63,039
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    "Deep in His Heart"
    Hi Angel...

    As for the vote, my answer would be, don't be tempted, not a straight yes or no. I definitely would not suggest kisses of passion. Yet, engaged couples do express affectionate gestures, however within bounds of virtue and restraint.
     
    newgrowth15, momi and janiebaby like this.
  7. janiebaby

    janiebaby Well-Known Member

    Blog Posts:
    0
    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2006
    Messages:
    14,513
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    33,893
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Ah gotcha. Thank you! Yea all I know is kisses of passion so I have to work backwards :lol:
     
    Shimmie likes this.
  8. Shimmie

    Shimmie "God is the Only Truth -- Period" Staff Member

    Blog Posts:
    0
    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2006
    Messages:
    33,518
    Likes Received:
    63,039
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    "Deep in His Heart"
    The Holy Spirit is your Helper. He will always lead and guide us into all truth...always.

    When we are serious about walking right with God, we don't allow our flesh to dominate our spirit. We walk away from temptations and never look back.

    Therefore, you can overcome your flesh. Jesus did not leave us alone.

    :bighug:
     
  9. trueheartofgold

    trueheartofgold Well-Known Member

    Blog Posts:
    0
    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2014
    Messages:
    663
    Likes Received:
    4,116
    Trophy Points:
    93
    janiebaby likes this.
  10. YvetteWithJoy

    YvetteWithJoy On break

    Blog Posts:
    1
    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2016
    Messages:
    10,084
    Media:
    22
    Albums:
    11
    Likes Received:
    44,439
    Trophy Points:
    113
    I don't believe the bible discusses whether premarital kissing is a sin or not. Thus, it's a matter of wisdom.

    If you or your partner cannot handle it, I advise avoiding it.

    However, it is just my opinion: Kissing, hugging, and hand-holding are natural and normal and informative. Christians will take care to do so in respectful, loving ways, locations, lighting, etc. I think Christians risk veering into a strange abnormalcy when they do things like vilify or scarify safe kissing between two people who can kiss without then needing sex. I think it is okay to kiss your boyfriend and feel your heartbeat.

    I could be so wrong. It is just my opinion based on the culture I have lived in, the model Christian relationships presented to me, etc.

    Heavy petting in a private location? Very unwise, in my opinion.
     
    Last edited: Sep 23, 2017
  11. janiebaby

    janiebaby Well-Known Member

    Blog Posts:
    0
    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2006
    Messages:
    14,513
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    33,893
    Trophy Points:
    113
    I was thinking more and more about it after last night and I've come to the conclusion for now that it's very personal and subjective. I was thinking about how the Bible says kiss one another in greeting and it started to get me thinking about my beliefs about kissing. So for right now it's still a no-go. I may develop into a person who's able to give a friendly kiss but that just ain't today *shrug* and that's ok.

    I was also reading Romans 14 which I think is applicable to this topic. For me, my task is to be able to take the sex out of the kiss. That's not everyone's struggle.

    My goal is still to hear everyone's viewpoint. I don't tend to feel convicted by anyone's opinion (only child syndrome) but I do feel that there could be a bit of wisdom in there :yep:
     
  12. Choclatcotton

    Choclatcotton Well-Known Member

    Blog Posts:
    0
    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2005
    Messages:
    1,606
    Likes Received:
    1,436
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    frozen mitten to the Pacific
    Let's just say if have a little cake you will want te whole piece. LOL, therefore, I don't even o there until i am wedded. My first kiss was at the altar wit my late husband. If a man cant respect that ten deuces.
     
    janiebaby and Shimmie like this.
  13. YaniraNaturally

    YaniraNaturally WL-HL???

    Blog Posts:
    0
    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2010
    Messages:
    1,906
    Media:
    1
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    7,793
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    Northeast
    I don't mind kissing before marriage but I don't believe in kissing on the first date or anywhere near it. I like to settle in a bit first. Location matters too. A quick hello peck at a restaurant is much different to kissing in a car at night.

    Follow your convictions.
     
    trueheartofgold and newgrowth15 like this.

Share This Page